SessXRin Drabbles
by elohiniar
Summary: Conversations Rin and Sesshomaru would have, from the time she meets Sesshomaru to the end of her life. Consider these drabbles connected to, Sesshomaru's Heart, Sesshomaru's Fear and, Lost Memories and Instinct. It just makes it easier. Since these are drabbles consider the series complete. Unless I add more. Please R and R.
1. Table of Contents

**Table of Contents**

**_Okay this is lame that I only thought of this now, I don't want to shift all the chapters to make this in order. So I'm just going to list the titles of the chapters and brief descriptions, this will be updated each time I post a new chapter._**

**1\. ****_Table of Contents_**

_Self explanatory_

**2\. ****First Words**

_Sesshomaru revives Rin with Tenseiga after being mauled by wolves. She follows after him. We see from the author's point of view the first moments with Sesshomaru-sama before Rin begins to speak for the first time._

**_3\. _****The Field of Daisies**

_This takes place after the episode "True Heir". Sesshomaru abandoned Tenseiga to Totosai. Rin asks to take it and promises to return it. Rin tricks Sesshomaru into taking back Tenseiga and then spends the afternoon playing on his back in his true form._

**4\. ****_Parting_**

_Sesshomaru says good bye to Rin when she is 8._

**_5\. _****_First Visit_**

_Made by Fan Request: Sesshomaru's first visit after leaving Rin in Kaede's village._

**_6\. _****_Marriage_**

_Rin is fourteen. Sesshomaru comes to the village to visit Rin. Upon arrival he finds Rin is missing. He discovers that Kaede began speaking to Rin about getting married. Furious he follows after Rin. What transpires is an adorable conversation between Rin and Sesshomaru about love and marriage._

**_7\. _****After the Kiss**

_Rin is 15 years old. The afternoon before she kissed Sesshomaru on a dare, this is what happens afterwards._

**8\. ****_Flying_**

_Made by Fan Request: Rin is 15 years old. On his last visit Rin kissed Sesshomaru on a dare, what happens on the next visit_

**_9\. _****_Let's Talk about Sex Baby- Lemon chapter_**

_Made by Fan Request:_ _Rin wakes up after having made love to Sesshomaru the first time. They discuss his previous sexual experience and Rin's insecurities._

**_10\. _****_Jaken Finds Out- Soft Lemon_**

_Jaken is informed of Rin and Sesshomaru's relationship. Ensues some cute interactions between Rin, Jaken and Sesshomaru._

**_11\. _****_Rin Tells Sesshomaru About Yuki's Pregnancy- Soft Lemon_**

_Rin finally tells Sesshomaru she is pregnant. This is their interaction afterwards._

**_12\. To Raise a Hanyou_**

_Made by Fan Request: Sesshomaru and Rin learn about raising their hanyou daughter Yuki_

**_13\. _****Yuki's First Words**

_Made by Fan Request: Yuki speaks her first words. It's cute._

**14\. ****To Conceive a Demon- Lemon Chapter**

_This takes place after Sesshomaru's Fear. Rin wants another child after giving birth to Yuki. She discovers that Sesshomaru must channel his primal energy in order to do so, which creates some animalistic tendencies on his part. Will they be able to conceive another child and move past one of the challenges of being a human/yokai couple?_

**_15\. _****Good-bye Kaede**

_This lovely drabble follows life from the time Miroku comes to get supplies for Rin's impending birth until the end of her life. Contains scenes from Sesshomaru's Fear and happens directly before Lost Memories._

**_16\. _****Sesshomaru's Regret**

_Made by Fan Request: This drabble takes place between Chapter 10 and 11 of Lost Memories. Rin is still in a comatose like sleep after miscarrying their third child after her battle against the bad guy. Yuki awakens with an injured back, Sesshomaru teaches her to heal herself. Kagome brings medicine from her time to help Rin heal and Sesshomaru discusses his regrets with his son and daughter._

_**17\. **_**Hisato Life of a Guard**

_Made by Fan Request: Hisato is the loyal guard of Rin and the children. Yuki is precocious eight year old girl and Harutoga is a calm 5 year old boy. Sesshomaru hired Hisato to guard Rin and his children during his absences. This takes place from his point of view. We find who his soulmate is. Takes place after Lost Memories_

**_18\. _****_Kagome's Attraction_**

_Made by Fan Request: Kagome asks Rin about Sesshomaru's defined body. It turns into Gobodo-sama giving a lecture about the varying degrees of human blood and how it changes the markings while Kagome gets an eyeful of Sesshomaru, Hideyoshi, Sato and Hisato._

**_19\. _****_Why Rin was Unhappy_**

_Rin and Sesshomaru discuss why she was so unhappy. Takes place after Lost Memories._

**20\. ****Sneak Peek into Instinct- Lemon Chapter**

_Touma has returned with a new plot to destroy Sesshomaru's family from the inside out preying on his instincts. We see the couple finally begin to move on from the miscarriage that shattered their live in Lost Memories. This will be a sequel to Lost Memories, do not expect to see it published for a long time until I can get it together to write it._

**_21\. Rin's Sickness_**

_Made by Fan Request: Sesshomaru arrives home during the third month of Rin's pregnancy to find his house in emotional shambles. Akari, Yuki, Sota and Taisho are all in human form. Rin is so ill from her pregnancy she can't get out of bed._

**_22\. Aftermath of Instinct- Lemon Chapter_**

_Rin decides she needs to talk to someone that isn't a dog demon after Sesshomaru and Natsuki have sex again in Chapter 14 of Instinct. She goes to Bukoseno and asks for advice._

**_23\. Hisato and Gobodo-sama- Lemon/Lime_**

_Made by fan request: This shows the first encounter between Hisato and Gobodo-sama before they are bonded to each other._

**_24\. Dog Sounds_**

_Rin and Sesshomaru discuss what his various sounds mean while spending time in seclusion together in their villa. Rin may make fun of him for purring like a kitten._

**_25\. Simple Conversation_**

Rin has a nightmare in the middle of the night. As Sesshomaru cares for her she comes down with a fever. They discuss their relationship.

**_26\. Time in the Villa - Lemon Chapter_**

_Sesshomaru returns to the villa after leaving Taiyomaru with Bukoseno. He finds her hot and bothered and decides to help her dream along waking her in the process. This is really a glorified smut chapter._

**_27\. Rival Lover_**

_Made by Fan Request: Katsumoto, a cousin of Hisato becomes infatuated with Rin. He attempts to steal her from Sesshomaru. The consequences have an interesting effect on their relationship as they continue their week of seclusion in the Villa._

**_28\. Relaxation_**

_Rin's fever persists. Sesshomaru figures out a way to wield their bond and heal her of their fever. They share a sweet conversation by the river._

**_29\. Feminine Attraction_**

_Made By Fan Request: Sesshomaru and Rin return to their home as soon as she leaves he feels a something tugging at his bond to Natsuki and Rin. He returns to find well...read and find out_

**_30\. The Last Day in the Villa and First Day Home- Lemon_**

_Semi Fan Request: Sesshomaru and Rin complete their last morning in the Villa and their return home. They deal with the after effects of Touma's attack on Rin, both mentally and physically._

**_31\. Katsumoto's Training- Soft Lemon_**

_The upstart demon who tried to steal Rin begins his training at Sesshomaru and Rin's home. What ensues, is hilarity._

**_32\. Hisato's Bond- Soft Lemon_**

_Fan Request: Gobodo-sama returns to Hisato to finally complete their bond._

**_33\. Sneak Peek at the Disease_**

_Fan Request: Sesshomaru discovers Rin after she went through the well and visited future Sesshomaru_

**_34\. Sneak Peek at the Disease Part 2/reincarnation story_**

_This is how I wanted part of the reincarnation story to go...should I roll this into the Disease?_

**_35\. Important Author's Note and Review Responses_**

_Self explanatory_

**_36\. A Day in the Life of Harutoga_**

_Made by Fan Request: A day through the eyes of six year old Harutoga._

**_37\. Rin's Weapon_**

_Made by Fan Request: Rin chooses her weapon of choice._

**_38: Rebirth_**

_Atsuko goes into labor with her baby but something goes wrong. Closure to Lost Memories._

**_39\. Sota's Wedding- Limes_**

_Made by Fan Request: The day of Sota's Wedding has finally come. The story is told through the eyes of all the members of the family._

**_40\. After Harutoga's Birth_**

_Made by Fan Request: Sesshomaru cares for Rin after she gives birth to Harutoga_

**_41\. Author's Warning._**

_Pretty self-explanatory_

**_42\. The Children Lead the Way_**

_An Earthquake in collapses Sesshomaru's home and threatens his life and Harutoga's._


	2. First Words

**First Words**

_If it isn't extremely obvious from what I write below, this one-shot takes places after Sesshomaru revives Rin when she is eight years old. I often wonder what her first words to him were, and how long it took her to start talking to him. _

The smell on the wind surprised him. Wolves were abundant in the area, but it wasn't there smell that aroused his senses. His mind flashed back to the little girl that had been trying to "save him". Her toothy grin flashed through his mind. He didn't like what his senses told him or that his feet seemed compelled to follow her scent. He found her on a dirt road, her ankle twisted into the grasp of a gnarled branch. Her tiny body was covered in puncture wounds. The light was gone from her eyes. That also bothered him. It was bad enough the smile caused an uncomfortable warmth in his chest from a child who had obviously just taken a beating. But now it seemed the wolves had mauled her to death.

Jaken the green toad that followed him everywhere spoke out, "oh she's a goner. Do you know this child?"

Sesshomaru ignored him. Jaken always had something to say. But then something happened, Sesshomaru's eyes closed for a moment, when they opened he saw them, minions from the netherworld. Four grey monsters with beady eyes surrounded the limp tiny body. They were taking what was left of her life, carrying her to the afterlife. Tenseiga pulsed at his side, "should I try it? The power of tenseiga?" He slashed through the bodies with a luminous blue light. The grey bodies disintegrated in the wind created by tenseiga.

Sesshomaru knelt down, he lifted the lifeless girl onto his knee. Shock, that was the only word that came to his mind when tired, little brown eyes looked back at him. The _thud, thud_ of her heart vibrated against his hand. He gasped in surprised. He had just brought the child back to life. She gazed at him with hopeful eyes. He stood and walked away.

In the background Jaken was screaming and crying about something. That wasn't what gave him pause. As Jaken finally caught up, there was a new sound behind Sesshomaru, the light step of little feet. He stopped to look over his shoulder, the little girl was following him. "Do you have a family?" Sesshomaru faced forward.

There was no answer behind him.

"Answer Sesshomaru-sama when he speaks to you dirty human!" Jaken shrieked at the girl.

Sesshomaru turned around, recalling that up until this point she had refused to speak to him. The only sound he heard was a pitiful high pitched cry. He caught Nintojo in his hand before it landed on top of the cringing girl. "Jaken," Sesshomaru's voice was cold and firm, "do not touch her."

"Do you intend on letting her follow us, Sesshomaru-sama?" Jaken's mouth was practically on the floor.

Sesshomaru eyed the girl, she was still ducking. Tiny dirt covered hands were covering her face. The bruises were gone, the swollen eye was open. Tenseiga brought her back completely whole. "Do you have a father? Mother?" He inquired of the little girl again. But then he wondered what kind of parents would let the girl dress in clothes that clearly didn't fit her and that stunk as badly as they did. From the first moment he saw her she had never been clean, she was always splattered in dirt and foliage from the forest.

She wrung her fingers and hung her head low. Her face overcast with sadness.

Sesshomaru turned on his heels, "we go." They walked back to the field where his loyal two headed dragon waited for them.

The little girl ran up to the dragon, she touched one head, then the other and smiled. Sesshomaru looked at the pathetic little thing, it didn't escape him that her hands seemed thinner than they should be. Sesshomaru continued past the two headed dragon and towards the smell of fresh water. A lake was nearby. "Jaken," he turned on the little green monster.

"Yes, Sesshomaru-sama?" Jaken fumbled with the brown hem of his robe.

"Go find her a new kimono," Sesshomaru continued towards the body of water he smelled in the distance. He looked at the little girl, she had a surprised look on her face.

"You want this Jaken to go to a human village?" He stammered, clearly incredulous.

Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow at Jaken.

"We're really taking her with us?" Jaken started backing away.

Sesshomaru tilted his head annoyed. He ground his teeth.

"Yes, Sesshomaru-sama," Jaken scurried on top of the two headed dragon and flew away.

Sesshomaru was grateful for the silence.

"We go," he looked at the girl. She was watching him intently. She followed behind him, quiet as she had been from the moment she first came upon him.

An hour later, Sesshomaru found the body of water he was looking for. Halfway through the walk it was obvious the child was tired. Her footfalls became erratic. She fell once skinning her knee. She didn't cry, not even when the blood dripped down the tiny appendage and splattered her already dirty feet. The smell of her blood and the thunk caught his attention, Sesshomaru turned around and took in her tiny form. She pulled herself off of the ground, dusted off her front and continued on. She limped slightly on the leg that was cut. Something stirred again uncomfortably inside Sesshomaru. He walked over to the girl, picked her up and flew the rest of the way to lake.

Once there he set her down, "wash yourself." He sat down under a tree. Jaken should be returning soon. He wondered if she had a name, what happened to her parents? Were they good parents? Did they feed her? When she removed her kimono, her spine protruded from her back, her ribs were visible, through her skin. It was obvious she hadn't eaten well in a long time. There it was again, that uncomfortable feeling in his chest. He didn't have a name for the feeling. It was tight, bitter. It brought out his protective instincts. Clearly she had been neglected. Sesshomaru turned around just as Jaken landed with the nameless two headed dragon. Sesshomaru had never found use in naming the thing.

Jaken ran up to Sesshomaru and showed him the checkered orange and yellow Kimono with the green sash. "I have it, Sesshomaru-sama!"

"Help her wash," Sesshomaru barked at Jaken.

"What?" Jaken hung the clothes from a nearby tree branch.

Sesshomaru turned on Jaken, since when did he have to repeat himself?

Jaken backed away apologizing, groveling, on the forest floor and ran to the little girl. There was splashing and another sound. It tickled Sesshomaru's senses, _laughter. _She was laughing. Jaken tore a piece from her old Kimono and she ran from him up and down the side of the lake while he tried to pin her down and wash her. She kicked at him, and eventually Jaken landed face first in the lake with a big splash. Sesshomaru had to stifle a chuckle. For now he was hunting his prey. The smell of deer filled his nose. He was hungry himself. He left them without a word, expecting to find them in the same place when he returned.

He returned with a sumptuous doe, skinned only minutes later. "Make a fire, Jaken," he commanded. Sesshomaru had already eaten his fill in private. He figured if the little girl saw him eating raw meat it might make her sick or scared. Behind those chocolate brown eyes, a sorrow lingered. "Cook the rest of the meat."

"Cook the meat?"

Sesshomaru picked up a rock and threw it at Jaken's head.

"Yes, Sesshomaru-sama," Jaken scurried over to the leftover carcass and began preparing the meat.

The little girl smiled at him again. She pranced around in her new kimono. Her knee had bruised over in a black and blue. She ran over to Sesshomaru and bowed low on the ground. "Your welcome," he told her. He didn't need words, from one silent being to another he knew what she was saying.

As soon as the child ate, and Jaken stored away what was left, Sesshomaru stood from his place beneath a tree, "we go. Jaken?"

"Yes?" His voice was getting more and more pathetic.

"Put the girl on the dragon," she was already looking rather drowsy with a full stomach that pooched out like an overstuffed pocket. That brought about the uncomfortable feeling again in his heart. Had she really been so desperate to feed him, when she hadn't had enough food for herself?

"P…p?" Jaken shrieked as Sesshomaru's foot came flying at his head.

Sesshomaru turned and continued on. Behind him were the heavy footfalls of the double headed dragon and the quiet grumblings of Jaken. Sesshomaru peaked over his shoulder, she was already asleep stomach down snoring on the dragon's back. Sesshomaru had his suspicions of where the bruises on her face came the day she first smiled at him. She was an orphan, had no one shown her the slightest bit of kindness? To make sure she was clean? Or that she had enough food to eat? And there it was again, his instincts told him the child needed protection, perhaps he should have found a human village for her. Was this how humans treated the orphaned?

He was drawn out of his thoughts by hysterical high pitched, ear piercing screaming. He turned thinking she was in danger only to find her tossing in her sleep. The motion caused her to fall from the dragon's back. She thudded to the ground scooted backwards and backed into a tree. Fear, she wreaked of fear. It didn't suit her at all. She was covered in sweat, her hair was matted. For the first time he heard her speak, "no, no! Not ka-san! No, ni-san, no!"

He walked towards her, she was having a nightmare. Her body shook so hard, she shuddered in short breaths.

"Oi stop that noise!" Jaken yelled at her waiving Nintojo in the air.

Sesshomaru glared at Jaken. He wasn't sure what to do with the terrified child, "quiet." He instructed her with a tender voice he didn't know he had.

She stopped shaking, she looked up at him. There was little light in those eyes, not like when he had first met her. _What demons hide in her past? _He wondered to himself. He knelt down in front of her, "why should you fear when you are with the great Sesshomaru-sama?"

Her eyes lit up, the smile and the light came back.

Jaken peered over Sesshomaru's shoulder, "what is your name child?"

The little girl glared at Jaken fiercely.

"If you don't wish to speak, that is fine," Sesshomaru stood up. "We go," he intoned firmly.

"Rin," the voice was almost inaudible behind him. "My name is Rin, Sesshomaru-sama."

_Rin._ He thought to himself as he walked ahead. Her footfalls fell behind him and damn if it didn't feel natural for a human girl to be following behind him.

**To Guest #1 and #2 **_Thank you! _

**Gayle Nightingale** _The goal is to stay close to my other three stories so I don't have to worry about new character development. I just may change a few things here and there ;). _


	3. The Field of Daisies

**_This place is mentioned frequently in all three stories. It ends up being the place where Sesshomaru decides to build their home. This happens after the episode True Heir. _**

"Umo, can I have it?" Rin looked up hopeful at Totosai. She took Tenseiga from the crazy old sword maker and ran to catch up with Sesshomaru-sama, "I'll give it back to him when he is in a better mood!"

Rin ran after Sesshomaru until her feet started hurting. He usually didn't set the pace so quickly. She stopped for a moment to massage the blisters forming on her heels. Sesshomaru-sama was still in a foul mood. Rin considered how she would get him to take back Tenseiga when he seemed so angry with the sword. It was nearly as tall as she was and although he wielded it lightly, it was a burden for her.

"Rin, keep up!" Jaken yelled back at her.

"My feet hurt!" She yelled back at Jaken. "Stupid Jaken," she whispered under her breath.

Sesshomaru stopped for a moment. His eyes tracked back to Rin who pushed herself back up and trotted to keep up with him. He watched as Rin curiously lifted her nose into the air and smelled the wind. She almost looked like him.

"Neh, Sesshomaru-sama, I smell flowers! Can we find them?" Rin ran to Aun. She climbed onto the double headed dragon's back and took hold of the reigns still holding tight to Tenseiga.

"I'll go with you Rin," Kohaku ran next to Rin. He climbed onto Aun's back.

"Hey where do you two think you are going? The last time you we were without Sesshomaru-sama, Naraku attacked us! The last thing I want is Inuyasha saving us again!" Jaken shouted after them chasing the two children with Nintojo in hand

That gave Sesshomaru pause. It was becoming more dangerous travelling with Kohaku. The Shikon shard embedded in his back was constantly bringing enemies towards them. He would have left the child to his own devices, but the thought brought back that uncomfortable feeling in his chest. And keeping the shard close made Naraku's life harder. _I can no longer leave them by themselves. _He glanced at Kohaku and Rin on Aun's back. Kohaku tickled Rin's side as her laughter filled the air like the sound of a spring. "Neh, Sesshomaru-sama!?"

"What?" He turned around. He wanted to shake his head, Rin was still holding tight to Tenseiga. He wanted nothing to do with the useless sword.

"Come with us?" Rin asked him hopeful, "please? What if Naraku comes again?"

"I'll kill him," Sesshomaru raised his nose into the air. _Daisies, _he thought to himself, _a field of daisies. _The smell was sweet and too strong to be only a few flowers. He could also smell sulfur, pisceas and magnolias. "Follow me," he flew into the air.

Jaken screamed something and ran to get on Aun's back before they flew away.

Rin smiled as Aun followed Sesshomaru-sama, so far her plan was working.

"So many flowers!" Rin shrieked when they landed. She practically fell off Aun with Tenseiga still in hand. She dragged it behind her leaving an indentation from the tip of the sword in the ground. Rin's next foot fall caused a splitting pain on the ball of her foot. She bent over and shrieked in pain. "Ow," Rin sat down and rubbed her foot.

"What is it Rin?" Kohaku knelt down next to Rin.

Rin held up her foot blood trickled down the heel.

"You need to wear shoes," Kohaku ruffled the top of her head. He took her foot in his hand. One of the blisters popped and seeped with both blood and pus. Kohaku opened the shoulder armor on his left side and took out a shell with cream inside. He put the cream onto Rin's foot. Her face went from being wrinkled and in pain back to her smiling self. Kohaku tore a small strip from his belt and tied it around Rin's foot.

"I don't like shoes," Rin snapped back. She stood up. Suddenly Rin knew how to get Sesshomaru to take back Tenseiga. She hefted it up, and held it with two hands the way she had seen Sesshomaru-sama, "Kohaku can you teach me to use a katana?"

Kohaku chuckled, "sure, the first thing you have to do is learn how to stand." Kohaku pushed one foot in between Rin's feet to widen her stance, "wider stance, make sure your feet are the same distance as your shoulders."

"Yeah but I want to know how to wield it, like this," Rin swung the sword around. She nearly hit Kohaku in the head with it.

Kohaku blocked with his blade. "Rin that's not how you use a katana!"

Rin thrust at Kohaku laughing. Soon both children were giggling as she play sparred with Kohaku. She swung Tenseiga around nearly throwing herself down with the weight.

"Oi, Rin, Kohaku, stop playing with Tenseiga!" Jaken ran over.

Rin slammed Tenseiga towards Jaken's head.

"Stop that!" Jaken yelled as he blocked it with Nintojo.

Rin chased Jaken with Tenseiga, "look out Jaken-sama!" She swung it again at the little urchin's head.

"Rin," came a firm low voice from behind her.

"Hai?" Rin skidded to a stop as Sesshomaru-sama loomed over her.

Sesshomaru held out his hand, "that's not a toy."

"Sorry, Sesshomaru-sama," she handed him Tenseiga. As soon as he turned his back to her Rin smiled, _I did it Totosai-sama,_ she congratulated herself. "Kohaku, let's play hide and seek, Jaken-sama you play too!"

"Dai-yokai do not play hide and seek," Jaken folded his arms in his brown robe and sat down.

"You hide, I'll find you," Kohaku patted Rin's shoulder.

Sesshomaru watched the play curiously. Rin tried hiding behind trees, in patches of daisies and behind bushes only for Kohaku to find her within a few minutes. The sound of her heart racing and heavy breathing from running was enough to give away her location instantly. When Kohaku hid, he climbed trees, he blended into branches and barely made a sound as he leapt from branch to branch. If Sesshomaru's sense of smell wasn't so attenuated he would have lost Kohaku.

At one point Rin threw herself down on the ground and screamed, "it's not fair, I can never find you and you always find me!" She folded her arms and to Sesshomaru's surprise a single frustrating tear ran down Rin's cheek.

This child would be the death of him and he knew it. He wanted to make her smile again. "Rin," he whispered.

"Hai?" She trotted over to him.

"Look high in the magnolia," Sesshomaru told her.

Rin grinned and ran over to the tree, "but I can't reach him up there," she said in a soft voice. She jogged back to Sesshomaru. "Umo, Sesshomaru-sama, can you pick me up?"

Jaken's mouth fell open, "Rin, don't ask Sesshomaru-sama such stupid questions!"

Rin stuck her tongue out at Jaken, "but I can't climb all the way up there. I know Sesshomaru-sama, can you turn into a big dog?"

"He won't do it, Sesshomaru-sama only uses his true form when he is fighting powerful demons," Jaken gloated while rocking on the balls of his feet.

"Why not? He's a pretty dog," Rin looked at Sesshomaru hopeful, "he did it for his mother."

Sesshomaru rose off the ground where he had been sitting and staring at the sky. He leapt into the air. His smile melded into white fur he landed next to Rin in his true form his long white mane blew in the wind. Rin giggled and ran up to Sesshomaru, "can I touch your nose?" She squealed in delight.

He lowered his nose down to her. She stroked the wet white nose with her tiny hands. He bent his mouth down and nipped off the bandage on her foot. He gave the sole of her foot a bath with his tongue. Rin laughed holding her stomach, "Sesshomaru-sama that tickles!" He knocked Rin over with his muzzle and licked the other foot. Rin was laughing so hard she didn't notice the blisters healing almost instantly.

Sesshomaru nuzzled her onto his nose and walked over to the tree that Kohaku was hiding in. Sesshomaru extended his nose up until Rin was able to reach Kohaku.

Kohaku yelled in shock, "Rin that's cheating!"

"No it's not," Rin sat between Sesshomaru-sama's eyes, "I can't climb that high!"

Kohaku leapt down from the tree and walked towards Jaken.

Rin turned around and hugged the fur on Sesshomaru's head. She scurried over his head and onto his back, "neh, Sesshomaru-sama, let's make Jaken more upset than he already is, can we go for a ride?"

The big dog shook his head. He tossed Rin off his back. He caught her with his nose before she hit the ground. Rin slid down his muzzle back onto the ground. He gave her a good shove then turned around. Rin looked back at the giant dog. He motioned with his head for her to go hide. "Are you going to find me?"

He nodded.

Rin giggled again and ran to find a hiding place. She ran as far and as fast as she could, ignoring Jaken who bellowed at her that she was wasting Sesshomaru-sama's time and strength. The field was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen. The daises went on for what looked like miles. Rin continued running until she smelled sulfur. Just over a hill Rin found a small hot springs that probably could only fit three or four people. Next to the springs was the most beautiful sakura tree she had ever seen. Rin looked around, there was a forest behind the flowers but Rin didn't want to hide in there. She flopped down in a patch of ground covered thick in flowers and tried to hide herself amongst the petals.

She tried to breathe as quiet as possible as she heard the heavy thud of paws coming towards her. Rin was an observant child, she noticed how it sounded different than when Aun walked. With Aun she could hear the _thud thud _of his back feet followed by the _thud thud_ of his front feet. When Sesshomaru-sama walked, she heard the _thud thud_, of his back feet and only one _thud_ on the front foot. _I wonder if he misses his arm? _Rin closed her eyes and breathed in the afternoon air. When she opened them she was met with two fiery red eyes and big tongue that lapped at her face. She giggled pushing away at his nose. "Please can we fly?"

Sesshomaru-sama gave her a clear, _are you serious? _look. He lay down on his stomach. Rin clapped her hands in joy and ran onto his back. Sesshomaru-sama flew her into the air. She held on tight to his long white ruff. He flew straight up then flipped around causing Rin to lose her grip. Rin plummeted towards the ground. He caught her after she fell for a few seconds and then did it again. Rin's stomach clenched the first time but then she started falling off his back on purpose just to make him catch her. She laughed until she was out of breath. "Sesshomaru-sama can Kohaku fly too?"

Sesshomaru flew back down to the field of daisies where Jaken was rolling on the ground about Sesshomaru wasting his strength and motioned for Kohaku to get on his back. Kohaku looked at Sesshomaru shocked, "really?"

"Come on Kohaku!" Rin laughed, "it's fun!"

Sesshomaru flew them around and around, dropping them on purpose catching them until he heard Kohaku, "Sesshomaru-sama, Rin is sleeping." Sesshomaru turned his head to find Rin curled into his mane, snoring peacefully. The growl that came from his throat was like a staccato of laughter. She was worn out. Sesshomaru flew back to the ground. Kohaku jumped off his back and reached for Rin. Sesshomaru gave a warning growl that made Kohaku back away. There was something peaceful about the child sleeping on his back. Sesshomaru lay down on his stomach, he set his one arm in front of him and rest his head on it.

"Sesshomaru-sama!" Jaken came up, "if your enemies saw-"

Jaken was met with the same growl. He walked away with his head bowed. Rin continued snoring peacefully.

Late into the evening Sesshomaru felt Rin slide off his back. She walked over to his face and hugged his muzzle, "I love you Sesshomaru-sama."

Sesshomaru felt the warmth spread from his chest into his stomach. He answered by nuzzling her stomach with his nose. He shifted back to his human form and sat down. He patted the ground next to him. Rin curled into his mokomoko. He rubbed her back until she fell asleep again. Sesshomaru looked at the stars, it was getting too dangerous to keep her with him, deep down as much as he knew he was attached to her, the time was coming to say good-bye.

**Thank you for all the reviews! If anyone knows how to change the order without messing up reviews let me know or we'll just be cursed to skip around or for me to put a table of contents in the middle. **

**Guests **_I'm just lumping all three guests together. Your wish is my command I have an idea for writing Sesshomaru's regrets with his children. I plan to write it tomorrow I hope. I need to figure out how to reorganize these so they are in order. Yes, I have an idea for a second love for Sesshomaru. I know it's fanfiction but if you remember his mother told him that life is meant to be limited. I would love if she could live forever like __**moonlight**__ wants, but I don't see that in the cards for her. _

_As for whether or not I will write another full story, I came up with an idea and jotted a plot down that had me bawling my eyes out eeek. _


	4. Parting

**Okay is anyone else disappointed that RT didn't draw and Viz Studios didn't animate the parting between Sesshomaru and Rin? I mean I know the show is called Inuyasha not Sesshomaru, but it would have been amazing to see that. I wrote a brief parting in Sesshomaru's Heart. At the time I was trying to keep it simple and short, so I decided to write the longer parting here. I think I was also finishing Final Act at the time. Here is the longer version.**

**Interested in opinions. I almost 2/3rds done with Instinct. I am tempted to start posting some of it but then I will be on hiatus started August 26 for school. Which means I whatever gets up before then, is what gets up and the rest will have to wait until after finals in December. Is it worth it to keep people waiting or binge load in December?**

**Parting**

Sesshomaru observed as the tree-like fanged head of Naraku's disappeared into the well. He lamented that even a blow from Bakusaiga was not enough to dispel the power of the Shikon no Tama. It didn't stop a meido from abducting Kagome from behind, and sucking her body into oblivion. Inuyasha, the fool that he was leapt in after her. Sesshomaru turned from the well, "we go," he said firmly to Rin and Jaken. His work was done, Naraku was banished, there was no point in continuing his presence in the foul human village. Rin fell in line behind him, her face smudged with dirt, but still in rather good spirits after being abducted by Magatsuhi. He felt a surge of relief knowing that she was safe. For a brief moment, he surveyed the village. There were children coming out of hiding places, parents that held them close. A sense of comradery he had not seen other villages. In that brief moment he observed the village, he considered what he feared the most, leaving her behind. Allowing her a normal human childhood, instead of a life at his side, where she was in constant danger.

"Sesshomaru-sama!" An elderly voice called to him. The old woman, Kaede they called her came running after him. She stopped short of tripping on the uneven ground left behind by Naraku's destruction.

He turned to face the nearly white haired old woman with an eye patch and wrinkled skin like a prune that had been left in the sun for too long. He inclined his head slightly.

"Allow Rin to stay, Sesshomaru-sama. She is human, she must learn to live among her own kind," she leaned on her staff and huffed catching her breath.

"No! Rin doesn't want to!" Rin shrieked, her face contorted in a way he had never seen before. "I don't want to live in a human village again." She hid behind Sesshomaru's legs, ducking down to make herself invisible. He could hear the pounding of her heart, thudding like a fast percussion.

"Rin stop that, right now," Jaken attempted to correct her, "you're getting dirt on Sesshomaru-sama's hikama."

A tiny red raspberry colored tongue stuck out from little lips and blew spit at Jaken.

"I will care for her," Kaede continued as if Rin had said nothing. "She will be safe here. We both know a life by your side means constant danger."

He blinked his eyes, considering her offer. A life where she would not face danger, where she could grow up safe. Isn't that what he had thought when her body began to fade, her life force sluiced to the side in the underworld? The laughter of the village children tickled his ears, he would miss that laugh, the little feet that followed behind him. Here, she would have a chance to be human.

"No!" Rin screamed, instead of staying behind his legs, she dashed towards the forest.

"Rin come back!" Jaken attempted to chase after her. He was quickly flattened by one of Sesshomaru's feet, smashed into a green puddle on the ground.

Rin ran until she felt her face smack into a pair of sturdy legs that wore white hikama. The force made her fall backwards onto her back. She rubbed her sore nose and looked up at Sesshomaru-sama. "Rin," he said. Was that regret in his voice. He took her by the hand and led her back towards the village, to the old woman who said she would care for her.

Rin beat futily at his wrist, smacking it with her small fist in attempt to escape. "I won't go! I won't go!" She kicked at the dirt. He continued walking with her back to the village. It was a feeble attempt, she couldn't escape his grasp. She tried digging her feet into the ground only for her heels to plow the dirt. She tried kicking at his calves which resulted in nothing more than aching toes.

Jaken finally caught up to them. His eyes dilated with the disrespect she was showing Sesshomaru. His green tentacle like fingers shook against the wooden Nintojo, "Rin, stop showing such disrespect for Sesshomaru-sama!"

"Shut-up toad!" She screeched like a squirrel at him, "let me go," she renewed her attempts to free herself from his solid grasp. "I want to stay with you! I want to stay with you! Did Rin do something wrong?"

The words forced Sesshomaru to a halt, _she thinks she did something to offend this Sesshomaru, that this is a punishment. _He released her hand. The light that he enjoyed from her cheeks, the smile, the laughter was replaced by a terrified child. Even when she was kidnapped, he had never seen her like this, "I will come back to visit soon," he searched his mind for the words that would comfort her. He knew this was what was best, she would be able to run in the fields, splash in the lake, she would be with other human children.

"Why?" Rin sobbed, tears cutting a path down her cheeks and creating a pool in her lap.

"Because Sesshomaru-sama doesn't need a child following him anymore," Jaken griped. The sentence ended with Sesshomaru throwing a rock at his head knocking his skull so hard it left a bump.

"Rin," was that regret in his voice, he knelt down to be on her level, and gently placed one clawed finger under her chin to lift her face. "I will come back to check on you."

"No…" She sobbed and covered her face with her hands. Her shoulders were trembling so hard she could barely stand, she hiccupped back her tears to catch her breath.

Behind her, she heard Jaken whimper, "Sesshomaru-sama will not cry, he is too proud, so this Jaken must." Tears flowed from his eyes like a waterfall.

"Shut-up Jaken," Sesshomaru growled. "Rin, when you stay with me, there is danger." He paused, Rin was too young to understand that he was on the verge of sorrow himself. Too young to understand that a day might come when he wouldn't be able to save her in time. The trust she had in him, her faith that he would always be there spread like flood over the banks of his shallow heart. "When you are older, when you have had the chance to understand being human, you will decide. "

"Decide what?" She quivered.

Sesshomaru didn't answer, he made to stand but she grabbed the metal armor that protruded around his chest, her small face bringing his closer to hers, "will you hug me good-bye?"

Sesshomaru glanced down at his hand, _this hand was meant to carry a sword,_ yet it had carried Rin in the underworld. He had allowed himself to cup her face, and hold her hand in his mother's palace. Would it be so horrible if he embraced the little girl now, would it give her the confidence to allow him to leave?

Jaken's shrieked pierced the background. "Rin! Such rudeness! Of course, Sesshomaru-sama would never hug a human, who's filth…" Jaken fell to the ground squealing in pain from Sesshomaru's whip.

Sesshomaru wrapped his arms around Rin, folding her into his chest. He pulled her against his left side where his mokomoko cradled her almond shaped visage. He let his nose hover over her willowy hair, tickling his senses with that silly pony-tail she wore. In those last breaths they spent together his mind waltzed through their memories together. The sound of her footfalls behind him, the soft padding of her feet. Her sweet high pitched voice that sounded like a lark singing in the morning, the way she had melted the ice in his chest. "You will be safe here."

"Sesshomaru-sama?" The little girl whispered. "Don't forget me!" She hugged him tighter.

His deep voice floated into her ears almost as if it didn't exist, so quiet none heard but her, "I will visit often. I will not forget you, Rin." They walked somberly together back to Kaede. Rin continued wiping her nose on the sleeve of her kimono.

"Come Rin-chan, you must be hungry," Kaede held out her gnarled, rough hand.

"Sesshomaru-sama?" She whimpered.

"Go," he encouraged her.

"Good bye Sesshomaru-sama," she took Kaede's hand.

"Good bye Rin," he answered her flying into the air, barely giving Jaken or Aun a chance to follow him.

**Please review! I totally cried writing this.**


	5. Rin

**Yay thank you too all my readers. This story just crossed 16,000 views and it makes me so happy! **

**This is for AM78. On InuxKag drabbles they asked for a one-shot with Rin choosing her weapon with Sango. Here it is. This will remain here for a few weeks before I push it back to where it belongs chronologically.**

**Rin's Weapon**

She was twelve and he left her furious. Furious that she had dared to defend herself, to stand against the hordes of demons that had attacked the village and not hide like she was told to. Inuyasha had made her feel like she was nothing more than a burden, but it was Sango and Kagome who had given her heart that if she wanted to begin her training in earnest, she could. She stood in front of a row of weapons. Kohaku sat on a fence post with a large sickle tied behind his back. Satsu followed Rin as she inspected the weapons in front of her.

"Which one will you choose Rin-chan? A katana? The Hiraikotsu? A sickle, like Kohaku-kun?" Satsu leaned in next to Rin. "Do you like him? He's so cute!"

"Shh," Rin hissed at her. "I'm trying to think which one I want. Not think about boys."

"You're so boring," Satsu complained from behind her. "I heard that Hideki wants to marry you."

"Eww," she rolled her eyes.

"So you don't mind if I like Kohaku?"

"Go ahead," Rin said absent-mindedly as she gazed at the weapons in front of her with a hand on her chin.

"What if I want Jaken?" Satsu giggled.

"Sure."

"Sesshomaru-sama?"

"I don't care," Rin responded gazing at her prizes. One of the weapons in front of her would be hers.

"Are you even listening?" Satsu jumped on her shoulders.

"What?" She shook her head out. "I'm busy."

"The first lesson you need to learn is that it's about feel. You need something you're comfortable wielding," Sango plopped her large weapon into Rin's hands.

She nearly face planted with the weight of the weapon. "No…nope," she flopped it against the fence post nearly hitting Kohaku in the process.

"That's my old sickle," the boy said, picking it up and handing it to the girl.

"I know it's sharp. You nearly took my head off with it," she stood at the ready, swinging it in the air and threw it.

Satsu screamed and ducked. She landed in the dirt, her new pink kimono covered in mud with the sickle only inches from her face.

"Maybe not that either," Rin picked it up. "Sorry Satsu. Maybe I'm too much of a klutz for this."

"You just have to strengthen your upper body," Sango encouraged her while bouncing the baby on her back. "We still have a sword and a quarterstaff. Although we'll practice with quarterstaff whether or not you want to use it as a weapon."

"I have my bokken. I like that and I took out a few demons by myself," she ducked a swing of a blade from Sango, then ended up on her back with the older woman squatting on top of her.

"Over confidence, another lesson we'll work on."

"Oh fine," Rin pushed herself off the ground once Sango got off her. No one with a baby strapped to their back should have been able to move that quickly.

"How are you going to get married if you can fight?" Satsu picked up the sickle. "No man likes a woman stronger than him."

"She'll just have to find a man who's stronger," Kagome said as she joined them. "You could use a bow and arrow."

"Not as my main weapon. What happens in close contact? Sesshomaru-sama said he never held an attachment to a useless weapon. A bow becomes useless if I have to be in close range."

"That's where I come in," Kohaku raised an energetic hand. "When I'm here I'll work with you."

She exhaled happily then picked up the katana that was Sango's. It felt light and easy to move. She went through a few forms, practicing her ready position, sheathing it and unsheathing it as she moved. "I like this."

"Pathetic," a voice squeaked from behind them.

"Jaken-sama!" she shrieked and ran to the green imp. She picked him up hugging him. "What is this?"

In all her squeezing him, Jaken dropped a golden-hilted katana. A letter was attached to it with a thin red string. **_Use it well._** She knew the handwriting. She had learned to write Sesshomaru-sama letters and he sent her clipped replies. She unsheathed the katana to reveal a white slightly curved blade. She went through a few moves, jabbing, a ready stance, defensive stances, swinging it high over her head and then down. "What do you think Sango-san?" She handed the blade to her mentor.

Sango inspected it for a moment then tossed it back to Rin. "Defend yourself."

"What? Ah!" She blocked a blow to her head. Sango had somehow managed to grab her own katana back and slashed to Rin's left side. The girl raised the katana blocking, then to her right, she blocked again.

Sango kicked the katana out of Rin's hand and then slid her blade dangerously close to Rin's throat. "It's a fine blade. But you still have much to learn."

Rin was already out of breath. She swallowed tensely. "Okay. I want the katana."

"A fine choice," Sango said with a smile on her face. "We need to work on your grip. A sword is no use if one kick is all it takes to get it out of your hand. Here, I'll show. Kick my sword out."

"But you're holding a baby?"

"That didn't stop me from nearly taking your head," Sango held her katana out in her right hand. "Attack. Now."

And she did.

"Where did Jaken-sama go?" Satsu asked.

"I don't know," Kohaku answered as Rin tried to kick the sword out of his sister's hand.

"Harder!" Sango yelled at her.

Rin was breaking a sweat trying to get the sword out of Sango's hand. The slayer slammed the girl onto her back and held the blade of the knife against her neck, "one day, a death grip on the sword will save your life. Now keep practicing."

**Please Review!**

**Esther247: **Thank you so much for your gracious comment! Yes children see things very much black and white.

**Sessrinlover: **Not sure how to respond. I like my stories the way they are. In the anime and the manga no human/demon story ever ended well.

**Guest#1: **Assuming you aren't awesomeguest, coolguest, superguest. I hereby dub thee guestasaurus. My niece was conceived via a one night stand. So yes, you don't need love to make a baby, just sperm and an egg and that's basically what he said.

**AM78x2: **I know Sesshomaru could have done a better job but someone who is so clipped and short in speech and hides his emotions and expects others to do his bidding I don't imagine him saying more to Rin. I promise at some point (carefully because I am strapped for writing time0, I'll go back and make a hilarious Jaken scene going into a village to get her a clean Kimono.


	6. First Visit

**This was made by Fan Request. If anyone else has requests please let me know! Leave a review send a PM and I will try to write it. This was originally in Sesshomaru's Heart. The words, "my strength is your strength," play out in all my stories. It represents the special connection between Sesshomaru and Rin. This was another scene that I short changed, so this is the longer version. Okay if I didn't mention it enough times in other stories. I am a psych major, which plays out in my how my characters react to the world around them. I took inspiration from a few scenes where Rin seemed visibly disturbed by separating from Sesshomaru-sama when he asked her to stay in the village and in Forever with Lord Sesshomaru. You also here her say it many times that she still had nightmares about her family's death. When children make big transitions, which she would have going from being with the Dai-yokai to the village, it wouldn't be without it's challenges. I wanted to explore the idea of the nightmares resurfacing but in the end you see that she finds her peace with the dreams thanks to Sesshomaru. **

**First Visit**

It was her first few days in the village. After Sesshomaru-sama left her she waited for the perfect moment to run away. Sango and Miroku were off exterminating yokai in a nearing village. Kaede was packing to go off and visit the one called Jinenji with Inuyasha. Kaede yearned to grow her garden and have the many wonderful herbs for healing yokai and humans that Jinenji had. Rin was supposed to be helping, instead she walked towards the forest. She ignored Kaede's earlier warnings that the forest wasn't safe. She had been in the village only a few days and she was already miserable. There were other kids in the village but they thought she was strange.

"You came with all those yokai, what's wrong with you?" One of them, a little boy named Hideki asked.

"Where are your parents?" Another a little girl named Satsu asked.

"You look weird," the boy named Hideki said.

Rin walked away defeated. She didn't understand why Sesshomaru-sama left her in this village to grow up. She didn't like humans. Kaede was kind enough. Sango and Miroku brought her candy from the outer villages, Inuyasha was gruff and tried to tell her there was a time Sesshomaru-sama wasn't always kind. "Wait!" Little Satsu called, "I'm Satsu, I like flowers, do you like flowers? Do you want to play?"

Rin nodded her head.

"Come on! I'll take you the lake, we can swimming!"

That day, in the early days of her adjusting to village life, everyone was just distracted enough. Rin was going to find Sesshomaru-sama. She trudged into the forest unafraid. She had a bag over her shoulder with a meager supply of food. Food didn't concern her. She knew she could scavenge for whatever she needed. Sesshomaru-sama had taught her how to find food in the forest.

Rin walked until her legs started to hurt. She missed Aun. She missed being able to ride on the double headed dragon, when her legs got tired and she needed sleep. She sat down under a tall magnolia and closed her eyes, allowing sleep to overtake her. _Stupid Sesshomaru-sama, leaving Rin behind. _

Rin startled awake from the sound of hissing and something slamming against her leg. She didn't have time to scream or allow her eyes to adjust to what she was seeing. She bolted up and ran as fast as she could deeper into the forest. There were flying yokai surrounding her and two ogre in front of her, "I knew it!" One of them called, "that's Sesshomaru's human! Let's eat her!" He grabbed for Rin.

Rin tripped on a root and fell and hit her chin cutting it open. Rin cried. When she looked up the blue ogre dressed in a ratty cloth was reaching for her with an open clawed hand.

"Sankan tesou!" Came a yell from behind her. Inuyasha came flying through the air and decimated the blue ogre. He removed his katana and threw kango soha at the next one then a blast of meido to finish off the other yokai flying at Rin. "What are you doing kid? You worried Kaede-baba."

Rin turned away from him. She curled her knees into her chest.

"He isn't anywhere near here," Inuyasha sniffed the air, "at least not that I can smell. Come on, back to the village, we're leaving to go to find Jinenji," he held out his hand.

Rin turned away from it, not speaking.

"Fine, have it your way," Inuyasha hauled Rin into the crook of his elbow and ran with her back to the village.

When she was returned to Kaede's hut, Rin refused to talk to Kaede. She turned her head away when Kaede tried to adjure her of the dangers of entering the forest alone. Rin didn't want to hear it, she knew if anything ever happened Sesshomaru-sama would rescue her. She didn't want to be in the village, she wanted to be back with Sesshomaru-sama, not in this stupid village.

Rin tossed in her sleep. They travelled by horse, something Rin wasn't used to. She let the brown creature smell her hand. It's hot breath tickled the hair on top of her knuckles. She let the horse nibble on them, then she stroked its face before Inuyasha plopped her on the saddle. It wasn't that different from riding Aun, except the horse kept wanting to run with her. They journeyed, Kaede-Baba, Inuyasha and Rin until the sun began to set. Rin was so tired, she barely ate the dried meats and fresh figs before she collapsed on her sleeping mat.

Within hours, she was tossing and turning in her sleep. Inuyasha watched her curious. He had seen nightmares before. Kagome had them often after battle, or before fighting the demons called exams and tests. Especially the big demon test she had to defeat before they fought Naraku. Rin's scent changed from flowers, and fresh morning dew to the stench of fear. She was terrified, she cried, "no! Ka-san! No!" In her sleep. Inuyasha slinked towards her quietly. He tickled her chin.

"Oi, Rin, wake up," he told her. He had to come with them, the night after Sesshomaru left her in the village, he returned to find Inuyasha and told him plainly, _if anything happens to her, I will kill you. _

She screamed loud enough to cause the birds to fly from trees, to shake the ground beneath her. Her breath came out in pants.

Kaede startled awake next, "Rin-chan? What's wrong? A nightmare?" The old woman embraced Rin against her bosom, "it's alright, there, there, you're okay."

"I want Sesshomaru-sama," Rin said quietly, "when is he coming?"

"He didn't say," Inuyasha answered.

"But he said he would come, he said he wouldn't forget Rin," she played with the material at the bottom hem of her kimono.

"He will," Inuyasha encouraged her.

The next morning, Kaede became concerned. Rin wasn't eating. If she did it was only small amounts. Where she could chatter on for hours about flowers in the field and her favorite colors, she was becoming more withdrawn and quiet. By the time they returned with Jinenji who had offered to help tend their garden and get it started Rin was becoming silent again. Kaede whispered to Inuyasha, "I think you need to find him. Something is wrong, she isn't sleeping at night. She has the nightmare almost every night now. I know she needs time to adjust, but I think she needs to see him."

"I'll find him," Inuyasha went in search of Sesshomaru.

He found him surprisingly close to the village surrounded by a horde of ogres and at least a hundred yokai. Inuyasha hung back. Since receiving Bakusaiga, and Naraku's defeat there wasn't a demon that could stand against Sesshomaru. So Inuyasha proceeded to pick at his claws and wait for Sesshomaru to dispatch of the vermin in front of him. When he was done, Inuyasha went up to him and said, "you need to visit Rin."

Sesshomaru turned to walk away from Inuyasha calling Jaken and Aun as he did.

"Oi! Did you hear me? Something's wrong with Rin!"

That got his attention. His long silver hair whipped around his face as he turned around to face Inuyasha, "what's wrong with Rin?"

"Kaede-baba will tell you, I'm just the messenger," and just like that he ran through the forest back to the village.

Sesshomaru sent Jaken to a nearby village. He told him to find a new kimono for Rin, something that would keep her warm and grow with her. The one she wore with the yellow and orange patches covered her entire legs when he first met her. When he parted with her it barely went down to her knees. Jaken returned triumphantly with a purple kimono. It was striped lavender and royal purple with yellow butterflies. It suited her perfectly. Once he had it, he returned with Jaken to the village leaving Aun behind. He landed by a large plot of newly tilled ground. Rin bent over the ground with her hands in the mud, helping to put seeds in the ground. When she looked up, her eyes went from dark and shaded to bright lights. A large grin covered her from ear to ear as she alighted towards him. He watched curiously, stoically, as she slammed into his legs and wrapped her arms around his knees. "Sesshomaru-sama! You came back!" He pat her head with his right arm.

He lowered down the box with the kimono inside. "Clean your hands first!" Jaken yelled at her, "honestly, you're going to ruin the present inside."

Rin smiled at them both and ran to a bucket. She wiped the grime and dirt from her hands and returned to the box. Sesshomaru hadn't moved. She opened it quickly, excited to find what was inside. "Have you been good Rin?"

Rin nodded her head. She pulled the box open and took out the new kimono, "Kaede-sama, Sango-san look what Sesshomaru-sama brought me!"

"What a beautiful gift!" Kaede called.

"Jaken-sama, help me put it on!" She yelled at him, dragging him by the hand into the hut for privacy. She threw off her old Kimono and dressed in the new purple and lavender one. Jaken tied the red obi for her into a perfect butterfly on her back. She ran back out and strutted in front of Sesshomaru. "Do you like it?" She asked him.

"Yes," he answered her quickly. He sat down in the grass just as another little girl ran up to Rin.

"Rin!" This little girl had her hair tied into to pony tails on either side of her head, "is that him?"

Rin nodded, "yes," she answered. "Sesshomaru-sama, this is Satsu, Rin's friend."

_So she's made friends. _That made Sesshomaru suppress the smile that dared to mar his features.

"Ehhh?" The little girl asked, she grabbed Sesshomaru by the back of the head, "where are his ears?" Her hands searched through the hair on the top of his head looking for the feline-like points.

"Satsu! Don't grab Sesshomaru-sama's hair!" Rin flushed red.

"Off stupid child!" Jaken waved Nintojo at Satsu.

Sesshomaru reached behind him and removed the offending little hands digging around the top of his head for his ears, "I am not a hanyou." He scolded the girl.

"Hanyou?" The little girl asked.

Sesshomaru tilted his head to the side and pointed at his long triangle tipped ears.

"He's pure blooded, dai-yokai, I met his mother, she lives in a castle in the sky." Rin bragged. That too made Sesshomaru want to suppress a smile. "See the white sword? He used it to defeat Naraku, no one is as strong as Sesshomaru-sama!"

"He doesn't look very strong," a boy came over that stunk of mud and bugs.

"Shut up insolent little child," Jaken screamed.

Rin came over to Sesshomaru and whispered in his ear, "that's Hideki, he makes fun of Rin."

"What does he say?" Sesshomaru asked just as quietly.

"That Rin is ugly and weird because I came with yokai," she said. "Satsu is my friend, we play in the rice fields together. She is teaching Rin to swim."

Sesshomaru stood up from his place, unfolding his long slender body and stalked towards the little boy. The boy's posture changed from confident to unsure. He gripped Bakusaiga's pearled hilt. He stopped just in front of the boy, towering over him. Sesshomaru flashed his eyes red and let out a low, furious growl. He let his chin and mouth protrude enough to obscure his features. Hideki fled for his life screaming, "yokai! Yokai!"

"Serves you right insolent child! Never be mean to Rin again!" Jaken blasted the tail end of the boys feet with Nintojo.

Rin and Satsu both covered their mouths while they laughed. "He'll never bother you again," Satsu said.

"Sesshomaru-sama will you stay for dinner?" Rin clapped her hands in excitement. "Come," she grabbed his hand and led him towards her hut. For the life of him he couldn't understand why he allowed her too.

"Stop grabbing at Sesshomaru-sama Rin! Did you lose all your manners in the last month?"

"Shut up Jaken," Sesshomaru barked at him, stepping on his head as he followed her towards the hut.

Kaede came from the field and followed them, hobbling along leaning heavily on her cane. "Thank you for coming Sesshomaru-sama. I have been teaching Rin to write her own letters, soon she will be able to write one herself." A sweet smell floated across the room, Sesshomaru's mouth watered slightly. Kaede smiled, "wild boar, I left some raw for you, if you were to stay. Rin-chan has been waiting, she told me it was your favorite. Rin tend to the fire I need to speak to Sesshomaru-sama a moment."

"Yes, Kaede-sama," Rin answered her. She looked nervous to him. Against the light of the hearth, he saw that she also looked thinner than when they had parted.

Sesshomaru's chest filled with _pride?_ He wondered, was that the feeling, she knew him well. He followed Kaede out of the hut as she walked into the forest towards the bone eaters well. "She is slowly becoming happy, she still cries at night. Sesshomaru-sama, Rin has not been sleeping well. I am worried, she has been here for a month already. When she does sleep she has nightmares. The next day she cries and refuses to be comforted."

"I see," he answered, his visage remained unchanged as he examined the emotions welling in his chest, _she does not feel safe here._

"Did she do the same with you?" Kaede only had one eye, and though she spoke often and filled the air with words, they had meaning. Sesshomaru did not mind speaking with her, even if the majority of the conversation was one sided.

"Only at first," he turned back towards the hut. The door flap was pulled to the side. He could see her tending to the fire and churning the spit that cooked the food she and Kaede would eat for the night. He refused to tell Kaede that at night when Rin could not sleep, she would come into his lap and rest her head against his tail breathing softly. Or that on the rare occasions when he slept somehow the clever girl knew just how to not set his senses off and he would find her next to him.

"Did she ever tell you what the dream was?" When he did not answer her she continued, "sometimes, like a bird that has been caged for many years and released into the wind to spread its wings, a child should be encouraged to speak of a dream that never stops. She needs to know she is safe here, that you trust us, _all of us."_

"Keh," he responded, he knew what she meant, that he could trust the two hanyous here would not hurt her. With a heavy heart he walked back to the hut and called, "Rin, come with me."

Rin followed nervously. "Did Kaede-sama say I did something bad? I try to do what she says. I went into the forest alone and a yokai came for me, but Inuyasha-sama came and it was gone quickly, I promised to never do it again, are you mad at me? I haven't done it again after she used the cane."

"Foolish girl," he stopped when he knew they were alone. They were surrounded by fresh pine trees, tall magnolias and bushes. Above them a camaphor tree bloomed providing shade for their heads. The sun was setting casting an orange hue as the last signs of summer were quickly vanishing. The air was filled with the smell of meats, vegetables and milk. His stomach churned lightly, it was the way of humans to force obedience instead of demand it, expect it, the way he did. Had she really become so difficult? "Kaede said you are not sleeping?"

Rin nodded, "hai," her voice was dejected. She kneeled down to play with some flowers that were nearby. She held the stem of the flower between two of her fingers. She brought it to her nose and inhaled deeply.

"Rin, the dream, tell me of the dream." He commanded.

"I can't," she whispered shaking her head. He smelled fear and embarrassment wash over her, pain, and tears. He could not get used to the sound of her cry. He understood that children cried when they were scared, sad or hurt, but the sound shook his heart. It's why he attacked the monk in the forest when a demon had lured her away. He couldn't stand the sound of her screams. He was sure given the chance she would have stayed with them, but when she called his name and begged for him to come, he couldn't stop himself.

"Rin, I am not asking," he repeated himself.

She shook her head.

He went from his heart being pulled for her sadness to anger. Then he sighed, words, he did not use many, "Rin, even I fear at times."

She turned to him in shock, eyes wide and the tears stopped, "of what Sesshomaru-sama. Sesshomaru-sama is never scared."

"The day you were taken by the Band of Seven do you remember it? I knew as soon as I heard the blade through the mist, but I could not get to you in time and when Magatsuhi possessed you," he sat down next to Rin and motioned for her to sit as well.

"You were scared for Rin?"

"Yes," he answered softly.

"But you weren't scared of that man or that spirit?"

"I fear no one."

"I do," she licked her lips nervously, and took a deep shuddering breath, "Sesshomaru-sama, when I dream," she was swallowing hard, and her body began shaking worse than he had ever seen it. The smell of fear went from barely being noticeable to penetrating deep within his mind, "they killed my family. Thieves, they took my mother, she screamed and told me to hide. I heard her cry over and over while I hid in the barn, she kept screaming stop, let me die, and then she was quiet. My brother told me he would be brave, he took a pitchfork, but then he was gone, and my father, they took him. I couldn't breathe, I was so scared my heart stopped, the world was black and when I woke up they were gone. I had no family in other villages. No one who cared for me…no one until," she looked up at him shuddering and stuttering through her tears. She held her knees and her little body shook.

_Me, she was alone until she found me._ He thought to himself. "Rin," he put a hand on her shaking back, "you must trust that if this Sesshomaru-sama left you here, you are safe, when you wake scared in the night, you must remember that my strength is your strength." He untied his yellow obi and placed it in her hands. He held them in his own, feeling their delicacy, "my strength is your strength." And it truly was if she only knew, he would never have mastered Bakusaiga or Tenseiga without her company. She used his obi to wipe her tears and together they walked back to the hut. "Do you understand?"

"I think so," she answered.

Rin did not ask him to stay that night. Yet he did. After dinner Rin helped to wash the dishes they used. They sat by the fire with a book. Sesshomaru observed with pride as Rin chopped through it pointing out letters and words that she knew. _Why did I never teach her to read? _Jaken snoozed against the wall nearby, his arms folded. Sesshomaru left the hut when Rin changed into sleepwear. He stayed longer, not comprehending why he hadn't left yet. She curled onto a hard bamboo mat. A flash of lightning and thunder slapped the sky, lighting it with eerie shadows. Rin jolted. She picked up his obi and folded it around her hands. She thumbed the smooth silk until sleep took her. Sesshomaru shook his head, he made a mental note to bring her something softer to sleep on. As the rains came he noticed with disdain that droplets of water were making it through the hay stacked roof. "Kaede," he called the old woman who sat on the porch. He removed a bag of coins from his pocket, "you will ensure the roof doesn't leak."

"I will," she accepted the money reverently.

He glanced at her cane with scorn, "if you use that on her again, I will kill you."

"It's how all the children learn discipline, Sesshomaru-sama, in human villages it's normal."

"You will find another way, or I will remove her from your care," he folded his arms and leaned against the wall. A short time later, he heard it. Rin tossed in her sleep, she whimpered. Her scent spiked like rotten peppers, like siracha and spices, the sick smell of fear. He immediately left his place by the wall and placed an open hand on Rin's shoulder. The pressure of his palm against her arm settled her. "My strength is your strength," he muttered in her ear. She held tight to his obi. Leaving in the morning would be even harder than slaying a thousand demons.

As dawn came, Rin woke up. She rubbed her eyes. She walked out of the hut to find Sesshomaru gazing at the last stars remaining in the sky. "Are you leaving?" She still held his obi in her hands.

He nodded his head.

"When will you come back?"

"In a month, the evening of the full moon, look for me as the sunsets," he stood up.

"Sesshomaru-sama…can Rin ask for a hug again?"

This time as they were alone, Sesshomaru's smile effortlessly creased his features. He held his right arm out to her to avoid her scraping her face against his armor. He held her in one arm. Her brown eyes looked up at him. She smiled, "I love you Sesshomaru-sama. Don't tell Jaken, he would yell at me."

**Guest:** _Your wish is my command. Lovely guest about **Trafficked. To all my readers asking why I took that story down. The first two chapters were relatively unintense but as I said I am a Psych student. My goal is to work with victims of human trafficking. Through study, classes, documentaries, true and fictionalized books I have a very intimate knowledge of the realities that girls and boys face when they are forced into prostitution. Chapter 3 was extremely dark, it traumatized one of the readers. In that chapter it depicted Rin being be R...by man after man after man after man. Victims of trafficking can be raped between 10-30 times in one day. I want to tell an authentic story because the more people know about it the more we can do to fight it and stop it. No one should have to go through it. Trafficked will be reposted on AO3 when I finish it where it will be more suitable for adult audiences. Unfortunately when I write her R scenes, I do it through the eyes of a thirteen year old. The reader experiences R through her voice, her hopelessness, her drug dependency and eventually her courage. Once I get it on AO3 I will let everyone know. Keep an eye on my profile and I will post it in my stories. I am elohiniar on AO3 as well.**_

**Flor:** _Don't remember if I ever responded, I agree Rin needs a happy ending, she'll get one eventually. _


	7. Marriage

**In the Feudal Era it was normal for girls to get married around the time they started their monthly cycles. This represents what I think a conversation about marriage would like :). Especially knowing in the end they end up together in my stories.**

Sesshomaru flew through the air. He left Jaken behind this time while he went to visit Rin in the village. It was only a few months after Rin's fourteenth birthday. It wasn't really her birthday, she didn't know when it was, so they made up a date and that became the day they celebrated her life. He sent her a gorgeous emerald green silk patterned cloth to make into a kimono. It had embroidery on it in gold and silver that looked like vines climbing a lattice. She squealed in delight when he opened it, the faintest blush crossed her cheeks as she looked at him and bowed her head in thanks for his kindness. There was something else behind those eyes that day. When he arrived, she smelled like blood, but not her own. Sesshomaru questioned her as to who's blood it was. It held the faintest scent of a centipede demon. She didn't give him much of an answer as to how why. She smiled and continued on their walk.

Walks were becoming more frequent during the visits. Moments away from everyone else, he found her conversations to revolve around friends who were getting married, some of the girls her age were already pregnant with their first children. Of the many things he knew Rin was picking up in the village was herbs and midwifery.

The sky was a beautiful orange that day. It was speckled with patches of pink and purple. The air was crisp. As he flew closer to the village that autumn day, her scent seemed absent from the village. He landed lightly in front of Kaede's hut. Kaede was not in her home either. When he turned around he was greeted by the monk and several of his children. The monk's scent gave away his intimidation, "where is Rin?" Sesshomaru's voice was low and almost cruel. She hadn't been in the village in days, couple that with the wide brown eyes of the monk Sesshomaru knew something was amiss.

"She got into a fi…argument with Kaede-sama four days ago," the monk choked on his words, "we haven't seen her since then. She hid her tracks well, Inuyasha isn't here to use his since of smell to find her."

Sesshomaru glared for a moment, then turned towards Kaede's scent. She was in the fields with the scarred hanyou. They were harvesting something that had a putrid scent, perhaps humans thought it smelled good, but to his nose the smell was too strong. He stalked over to Kaede making sure to walk in between the plowed rows of plants, "what did you _fight _with Rin about?"

"It's nice to see you too Sesshomaru-sama," Kaede responded just a coldly as Sesshomaru. Her one good eye glanced at him in between plucks of greenery. "Marriage."

"Marriage?" Sesshomaru balked, "Rin wishes to marry?" That caused an uncomfortable twist in his stomach, she had not said anything to him. Was she ready for marriage? The idea of a man…no he would not go there, he was sure if he caught any man touching her in that way he would end their lives.

"No," Kaede knuckled her old bent back. She stood up coming just above Sesshomaru's elbow, "we discussed that it was time she start thinking about marriage. She did not seem very happy about the idea."

"She's fourteen," Sesshomaru tried to suppress the anger in his voice.

"Fourteen is far from a child," Kaede's eye took in Sesshomaru's aggressive stance, "tell me something Sesshomaru-sama, what did you envision as your role in Rin's life when she is old enough to get married and have children of her own? Many of the girls her age are already married and expecting their first children in the spring, why should Rin be any different?"

_My role in her future? _He had never thought that far in advance, he viewed himself as her protector, friend, confidant and at times he felt like a father figure to her. Obviously the conversation had not gone as Kaede had planned or else Rin would not have ran off by herself and stayed away for as long as she did, "did you imagine she would remain a child forever that doted on your every step? Would you pay the dowry for her when she does find someone? She is no longer a little girl Sesshomaru-sama it's time she stopped acting like one and prepared herself for her future." Kaede hobbled away from the inu-yokai.

Sesshomaru leapt in front of her, "there will be no further discussion of Rin's marriage without my consent. If fourteen is old enough to marry, it's certainly only enough to _decide." _

Kaede balked openly, her mouth hit the ground, "you would curse her to stand by your side and never experience what normal human girls do? Family, friends, children?"

"If you wish her to remain here longer, you will not speak to her of marriage again without my consent," Sesshomaru was already gliding into the air. "If Rin chooses to marry, it will be her choice, not yours and not that of this Sesshomaru."

"Do you plan on supporting her the rest of her life!" Kaede yelled at him as he rose into the orange autumn sky.

"Is money your motivation? For that I have plenty, you will not speak to her again without my presence about marriage."

"Kohaku would make a fine husband for Rin!" Kaede yelled at Sesshomaru who was almost out of earshot.

"Kohaku-kah?" Sesshomaru rolled his eyes. The boy was barely a man himself, only seventeen. Kaede basically just told him that Rin should marry because she was of the age, not for love, not for happiness, not for her own good. The child had already experienced too much sorrow in her life to be forced into a marriage of convenience, he would not allow it. _But will my role be, will she need me? _The thought plagued him as he followed what was left her fading scent. _Will my presence still be appropriate? We have not spoken about her return to my side for a long time. _The thought that she might make the choice to remain in the village almost pained him. He was comforted by her reaction to the conversation. Rin was undoubtedly against the idea of marrying.

Sesshomaru sped through the air, she had a four day start on him. It would not be that big of a hinderance unless she…Sesshomaru landed by a river. Her tracks were old, but there. Dainty feet that left light imprints ran into the shallow area of the river. Sesshomaru leapt to the other side of the river, unlike the side he had just been on, there was no sign of her having crossed. Sesshomaru laughed inwardly, and half grinned to himself, she would have known they were going to sick Inuyasha on her. Rin took care to cover tracks and her scent. There was something familiar about this wood. Sesshomaru sniffed the air. It held nothing familiar to him. He looked up river to the glade and then downriver towards the bush of the forest. He had to choose which one and hope it was the right choice. Something pulled on him, _I've been here before. _

The image of a little girl with a battered face coming into the forest upon an injured Sesshomaru washed into his head. This was near the village Rin had grown up in. He approximate about ten miles downstream he would find the long abandoned village where Rin had grown up before she found him in the forest. Sesshomaru floated near the surface of the river watching for signs of her exit. He was fairly certain this was the direction she had gone, as to why he was unsure.

Roughly seven miles downstream he caught wind of Rin's scent. The bush in the area was disturbed but only lightly. She was surefooted these days. Rin was confident as she travelled. She left no sign that she had camped anywhere along the way. No felled trees, no signs of a fire being lit at night despite the chilled autumn evenings. She did him proud being so self-sufficient. She was nearby. Sesshomaru spotted Rin behind a bush with a knife in hand. Half her face was covered with a scarf. She crouched waiting for a rabbit he could smell nearby. Sesshomaru stayed behind the trees. She stalked her prey, coming closer. The rabbit knew she was there, but had yet decide to run. Rin threw her blade, it hit the black rabbit in the neck, spilling it's life force on the ground. Rin came out from her hiding place the same time Sesshomaru did. Her eyes were wide, her scent was that of panic.

"Sesshomaru-sama," Rin picked up her prey, "you found me."

He eyed her curiously, _did she think I wouldn't?_

"I guess I'm in trouble," she knelt down and went to work skinning and cleaning the rabbit. "You remember this place don't you?"

He inclined his head.

"Quiet as ever," she muttered under her breath, "I wanted to go to my parents graves. You know that's where I was headed the day that I found you injured? I wanted to see them and my brother," for a moment she seemed sad. She removed the cloth covering her face. She wore a green hikama with a brown top. Simple, yet perfect for blending in to her surroundings. She looked up at him, expecting him to say something, "I just can't quite remember where they are buried. I know it was near where I found you, the village is gone. I guess Koga's wolves really did eat everyone, me included." The rabbit was skinned and ready to cook in moments. Rin put the carcass in her brown bag and stood up. "I'm going to get firewood. Are you going to yell at me for leaving the village alone?"

"No," he followed after her. He watched as she bent over and picked up handfuls of dried pine. She attempted although feebly to use her knife to hack away at dried saplings. Sesshomaru walked forward, he gave her a gentle push out of the way. He flicked his left wrist, his whip went flying taking down the branches of a piscea, in six even pieces.

"Thanks," Rin picked them up. She stood them up and removed a fire bow from her bag. "I didn't eat much the last few days, mostly berries and mushrooms. Do you want some before I cook it? I won't eat the whole rabbit." She cut off the hind quarters, she knew him well and passed it to his clawed hand. "Am I in trouble?"

"With Kaede perhaps," he nipped at the meat she handed him, "not with me."

"You know you could have told me you ate raw meat that day, I would have found something for you," Rin smiled.

Sesshomaru gave her a small grin, finally, smiling again.

"I guess she told you what we talked about?"

He nodded while chewing a particularly tender piece of the hindquarters.

"I don't want to get married, I'm not ready to be a mother," Rin blew on the sparks she created with her fire bow. Once the fire was burning stronger she put her own meat on a skewer and placed it over the burning embers. "I guess that's why I came here, I wanted to talk to my parents. Do you ever visit your father's grave?"

Sesshomaru took in her face, she seemed depressed. "At times."

"You know they died when I was seven, I was alone in the village for a year before you found me," Rin touched the meat, "almost done. I wonder if my parents would be proud of me? We didn't have a lot of money, we were poor. I didn't have so many clothes like I do now, we didn't always have food, but I always felt loved. My mother said that her family exiled her because she chose love over honor. I didn't know what that meant at the time, I was just a child, but I do now. Kaede wishes me to marry for honor, not because there is someone I love."

"Not even Kohaku?" Sesshomaru inquired as he finished the last of the rabbit.

Rin removed her skewer of meat, she pinched the sides, "ouch," she laughed, "he's more like a brother," she looked at Sesshomaru and flushed. There was a clear spike in her heartrate, "I don't feel anything more when I look at him."

"Is there no one that you like in that village?" Sesshomaru looked at the sky. It was getting dark, the stars were shining down on them, the moon was full.

Her dark brown eyes turned to Sesshomaru, "I don't like anyone like that."

There was something about the way she looked at him, and the clear lie that crossed her lips. He did not inquire further.

"Do you remember where I found you?" She scratched her head as she finished her own meal. "I'm tired now," Rin took out a blanket from her bag. She curled up on the dirt and covered herself with the tattered blanket. Rin shivered from the crisp autumn air.

"I remember," he sat himself down next to Rin. He looped his tail under her head, and around her legs, "you're going to catch a cold."

Her cheeks were redder than before, "do you think my parents are proud of me?" Her voice was sleepy, she yawned as she nuzzled into his fur.

"Yes."

"Are you proud of me?"

"Very much," he leaned against a nearby tree trunk.

"Sesshomaru-sama?" Her eyes had black circles around them, she yawned again, "can you take me to where I found you that day? They are buried near there, I want to tell them I'm okay and that one day I'll marry, just not now."

"In the morning," he replied quietly.

"Sesshomaru-sama?"

He should have known if alone with her she would prattle on, even though her body was begging for sleep. "What?"

"Did you love Kagura?"

He gasped shocked for a moment, had Rin really picked up on so much?

"It's fine if you did."

"Love is not the right term. Respected, perhaps, felt fond of, love would not have been possible, she knew it and so did I."

"Why?" Rin propped herself on her elbow.

"As one of Naraku's incarnations her life would end when his did. Her life was over the moment he discarded her from his body."

"Do you love me?"

He patted her shoulder softly, "go to sleep, Rin."

"I don't mean like that…I wouldn't expect that ever, I mean, you keep coming back to me, why? You're Dai-yokai, why me?"

Sesshomaru thought for a moment, it was irrational to bring her back to life with Tensaiga it was ridiculous travelling with her as a child. None of it made sense, not then and his attachment to her now also made no sense.

"Will you come to my wedding when I do get married?"

"Yes," his eyes were still on the stars. Would he be able to give her to someone else? Would he trust that man to treasure her the way he did? Rin was more like a daughter to him now. He counted the constellations. Rin shuffled in her blanket still trembling from the growing cold. Sesshomaru flicked his wrist at one of the trees knocking down another branch. He tossed it on top of the fire stoking the flames again.

"I don't have a dowry, I mean, I've saved a few things, but I don't have that much."

"Dowry?" _Ridiculous human customs. _

"You know, the woman pays the man for the trouble of taking on another mouth to feed? Can I come closer? I'm cold."

Sesshomaru pat his lap. Rin scooted until she was flush against his leg. He could feel her cold hands against his hips, he reached down and rubbed them in his own hands. "You needn't worry about your dowry. When the time comes this Sesshomaru will provide one for you."

"You won't kill my intended will you?"

Sesshomaru shook his head, if he didn't stop her she would prattle on all night, "sleep," he encouraged Rin. "You needn't worry about marriage now. Kaede will not speak to you of it again."

"Thanks," her voice was groggy, her eyes half-mast. "I love you, Sesshomaru-sama, my parents will be glad to know you took care of me."

For some strange reason those words lit a flame of pride in his chest. "Sleep," he repeated himself.


	8. After the Kiss

**Thank you all for the reviews. Don't worry, I'm going to give Rin a happy ending, sheesh. I may just torment her first. As I write Instinct though, I remind myself that when I started writing these in April, I was writing for me. I am so grateful for all the reviews, both the good and the critical. I have had so much fun posting on FF. After all that seriousness I needed a fluff piece. This takes place after Snowfall First Kiss...if you haven't read it, it's probably one of my funniest pieces. Rin wants her first kiss and her friends Satsu and Kohaku dare her to kiss Sesshomaru. Link below if you want to read it. Rin is 15 in this piece. It's winter time. I think I keep writing about winter to survive summer.**

**Oh stupid Ff not letting me put a link to their own freaking website. Seriously. Go to my profile and check out snowfall first kiss. It's hilarious.**

**Should have sat with this one overnight, I was too tired last night to think of some funny one liners to add. This is an updated version.**

**After the Kiss**

Rin sat near the square hearth of her home, warming her hands against the orange flames. She was soaked from head to toe in snow thanks to Sesshomaru-sama. Her entire body was chilled from the cold. The tips of her fingers were purple and blue and her toes felt numb. She glanced at her old boots with holes in the toes. She hoped that he brought her new ones. She stirred the pot of water lightly, waiting for it to finish heating so she could drink hot tea.

Jaken scampered in and out of the hut bringing in box after box. There were already four stacked against the far wall where Rin's sleeping mat was. Aun bellowed outside from the cold. Even his groans sounded frozen. Rin looked through the door flap when Jaken came in with two more boxes, she didn't see Sesshomaru-sama. _Why did I let them talk me into that?_

Rin puffed her bangs out of her eyes and stood up. _No sense pouting, _she told herself. "What are all these boxes?" She asked Jaken.

"Gifts, you ungrateful girl, how dare you do that!" Jaken waived Nintojo at her, his brown robe blew in the wind just as Kaede walked into their home.

"Do what?" Kaede leaned heavily on her cane as she walked towards the hearth. She removed her winter coat and hung it near the door. "So many gifts this time?"

"This brat," Jaken pointed at Rin, "kissed Sesshomaru-sama on the lips!"

"Rin!" Kaede yelled at her.

Rin flushed a deep shade of red and ran behind a room screen to change out of her wet clothes. "It was just a dare!" Rin called back, ripping off wet and freezing clothes. She hung them on the wall to dry, she rubbed her goosebump covered shoulders, trying to warm them.

"Rin," Kaede harrumphed at her again, her hands on her hips, "how dare you! Child what were you thinking!?"

Rin flopped her back against the wall and looked up at the beams that lined the hut, _obviously I wasn't. Stupid, stupid, stupid! _"Is he mad at me Jaken-sama?"

"Obviously," Jaken ran over and picked up one of the boxes, "here," he pushed it with the end of Nintojo to the edge of the white room screen. "If you must know, these are winter clothing, new furs for your sleeping mat, a softer futon to sleep on and new boots."

Rin suddenly felt very guilty. He always took good care of Rin, why did she have to go and makes things awkward between them. Not that they weren't already becoming increasingly awkward. Rin's heart seemed to always skip a beat around him, she felt herself blushing more when he arrived. It was like her body was telling her something she didn't want to admit. She took out an under layer and tied it down. It gave her only the smallest reprieve from how cold she felt. She went through the box that had four new woolen kimonos. One was a deep royal purple with light lime green leaves embroidered up the sides. She put it on and tied the obi the matching obi. She found another box with thick winter socks and pulled them on and another with wool hikama to cover her legs. She slid on a simple white pair and came out from behind the screen, "these are beautiful."

"Rin-chan, that's beautiful," Kaede limped over and examined the girl's kimono. "You should have more respect for him than that."

"It was a joke," Rin insisted, "Satsu and Kohaku dared me."

"And you had to say yes? Rin, what am I going to do with you? You refuse to even think of marriage, and spurn all the young men that come asking for you and on a dare, you kiss a Dai-Yokai?"

Rin lowered her head, "forgive me," she muttered sheepishly, "Jaken-sama, did he leave already?"

"He is out there somewhere, it's starting to snow again," Jaken answered Rin.

The wind began to howl like a pack of wolves in the night. Kaede went back to the door flap, "it looks like a blizzard is coming. Jaken take Aun to my shed, he will be warm there. Does Sesshomaru-sama plan to stay the night?"

"He was," Jaken sneered at Rin, "although now he may not ahh!" Jaken was flattened by a foot racing through the entrance.

Satsu ran into Rin's hut. Her brown eyes were red around the edges, her hands shook, her gaze spoke of fear. "Rin-chan!" She ran up to Rin, "it's my brother, Dou! He's missing! The snow is falling, he's only four!"

"What?" Rin ran down to the entrance of her hut, "I'll help you find him, Jaken-sama tell Sesshomaru-sama I'm sorry. I have to help Satsu find her brother!" She ran to the boxes rifling through them until she found the boots she had been hoping for. She shoved her feet inside and ran from the hut into the chilled winter air.

"Rin! Your coat!" Kaede held up a brown wool overcoat for Rin.

"Don't dress her in those rags, Sesshomaru-sama will eat me for breakfast," Jaken held a space blue overcoat up for Rin to put on with fur lining the inside. There was a large hood.

Rin ran back and grabbed it, "I'll try to be home before the sunsets," she hugged Kaede and ran into the snow with Satsu putting the coat on while she followed. "Where did he go last? Do you know his hiding places?" Rin hid her hands under her arms. She pulled the hood over her head. The wind blew fiercely against their faces, freezing their cheeks and stinging their eyes.

"I don't know, he was with my sister, then he was gone. He's only four," Satsu's hands shook against her sides. "Dou!" Satsu yelled as they entered the forest.

"Dou-chan!" Rin yelled, "where are you? Satsu go back to your home, I'll find him. Your boots are old and your coat is tattered. You're going to freeze."

"No, I'm not leaving you," Satsu held Rin's hand.

"I'll find him. Just go back home, I'll be fine, Sesshomaru-sama is around here somewhere. If you see him, give him something that smells like Dou, Inuyasha isn't here." Rin urged Satsu to leave. "Here take my coat," she pulled of the kingly coat and handed it to Satsu.

"What about you?" Satsu's cried.

"I'll be fine, this kimono is made from wool, I'll be warm enough," Rin hugged her arms to her sides. She continued into the forest herself, she listened for the child, hoping to hear him. "Dou-chan!" She called with her hands cupped over her face.

The sun was beginning to set. Kaede looked out the door flap into the whistling winter wind. The snow was already a foot higher than it had been in the afternoon. She had a wool blanket wrapped around her shoulders. "Where is she?" Rin had yet to return. Jaken snoozed by the wall after unpacking all of the new clothing for Rin.

Sesshomaru landed outside the hut and walked in. He looked around the hut and asked, "where is Rin?" Although he was unsure if he wanted to see her again after the stunt she pulled.

"Sesshomaru-sama," Kaede regarded him, "forgive me, I did not raise Rin to be so forward and do what she did this afternoon."

Sesshomaru's face failed to react to her knowledge of Rin's kiss. Jaken sputtered awake. "uh…Sesshomaru-sama, Rin went out with a friend to look for a missing child."

"Sesshomaru-sama," Kaede glanced at the boxes, "do you plan on proposing to Rin yourself?"

"_Propose?"_ His face was incredulous.

"You brought Rin so many gifts, is that the reason she has not married?" Kaede asked. "Is something more happening between you two?"

"It's winter," he grated at her, "Rin is in the blizzard?" He opened the door flap again, the wind blew the falling snow into whirlwinds. He didn't wait for Kaede to answer, he flew into the falling snow. He sniffed the air, _dammit, the fresh snow is marring her scent. _The sky was pitch black filled with grey clouds. The snow fell in droves. He stopped mid-air and closed his eyes. The wind blew against his skin, sending his hair flying. He ignored the scents coming into his nose and reached out with his ears. In the distance, he could hear her. The wind carried her voice from the forest. _He was fighting an evil spirit named Magatsuhi! First Magatsuhi called him weak, but no one ever d…dares to call Sesshomaru-sama weak. Magatsuhi was powerful. He burned Sesshomaru-sama's arm with a horrible shoki, then he pierced his one arm! He only had one arm then. _

He flew towards her voice further in the forest. As he approached a grove of snow covered pines he could smell the embers of a small fire and another dirt smelling scent alongside Rin's. _Magatsuhi impaled Sesshomaru-sama through the stomach twice, once through the back and once through his chest. His evil tentacles enveloped Sesshomaru-sama. I started crying, I thought he d...d…died._ He could hear her teeth chattering. Sesshomaru landed just under the branches. He would have to crawl under them to get in. He crouched down to find Rin holding a boy in her arms wrapped in her wool kimono that he had purchased for her. Rin had found Refuge in the only area of the forest not buried in snow. She wore only her under layer, _baka,_ he thought, "Rin," he called into the trees.

"Sesshomaru-sama? See I told you he would come," she set the boy down next to the fire, still wrapped in her royal purple kimono. Her hands shivered along the cold pine covered forest floor. The tips were blue again. Her teeth shook against each other, her nose and cheeks were nearly blue.

"I want to hear the rest of the story!" The little boy called.

"Dou-chan tripped and fell down a hill. I found him a few miles and carried him as far as I could before the snow s..st…stopped us," she hunched over next to Sesshomaru with her arms folded around her white cotton under layer. "I'm sorry…about earlier, I shouldn't have done that," Rin lowered her eyes.

"You're freezing," Sesshomaru rubbed her shoulders. "Where is the coat I brought?"

Sesshomaru pulled her against his chest and wrapped his mokomoko around her shoulders.

"I gave it to a friend, I'll replace it, I have some money," she leaned into his warm fur still shivering and trembling from the cold.

He had to act quick, she felt like ice, "bring the boy out."

"But the snow!"

"Bring him out," Sesshomaru backed away from Rin. He bounded into the air in one big ball of light. The markings on his face combined into a V as his face smiled and transformed into his true form. He landed on the forest floor in front of Rin and nudged her back into the trees with his muzzle.

Rin carried Dou, who was covered in dirt and pines, small scrapes and bruises towards Sesshomaru-sama. Sesshomaru lay down and motioned with his head for Rin to come closer. She sat down next to his neck still holding the boy in her arms. Sesshomaru-sama folded his tail on top of Rin. Rin pulled his long mane over their shoulders, and heads to block the snow falling on them. She snuggled into the warm fur, "well, the rest of the story is that he…well…I'm not sure what happened inside of Magatsuhi, Jaken-sama and I thought he was dead for sure. But then he came out with his left arm glowing. The power inside the light destroyed Magatsuhi's body, he couldn't reform himself and inside the light was a new arm and Sesshomaru-sama's katana Bakusaiga. He destroyed Magatsuhi's body."

"What happened to his spirit form?" Dou asked Rin.

Rin yawned, her teeth finally stopped chattering, "Sesshomaru-sama destroyed it with Tenseiga, but that's another story. Sesshomaru-sama always saves me."

"You're lucky," Dou told to her. The little boy climbed into Rin's lap. Rin wrapped them both in her wool kimono. Dou yawned, "my ankle still hurts."

"I'll fix it tomorrow, I think Sesshomaru-sama wants us to stay put, it doesn't look broken," she told him.

"Are you going to marry him?" Dou snuggled closer into Rin's stomach.

"Why would I do that? Do yokai even marry?"

"But he spends time here and gives you gifts, he must love you."

A low grumble rattled their bodies from within the chest of the big white dog.

"Is he courting you?" Dou continued on.

"No," Rin suddenly became defensive.

"But you kissed him!" Dou poked Rin's stomach.

They were rattled again by the vibrations coming from within the giant white dog.

"Did Satsu tell everyone?" Rin asked.

"Well, me, and sister, and mother and father, and…"

"Oh kami," Rin frowned and covered her forehead with her hands, "great." She elbowed the side of the dog, "see, I told you, no one is ever going to marry me because of you!"

The dog released a satisfied sigh.

"Do you love him?" Dou asked Rin.

Now she knew she was blushing and her heart was beating faster. Sesshomaru-sama would know if she was lying but she couldn't bring herself to admit her feelings, "no, of course not, he's Dai-yokai."

A guttural snarl came from the body of the dog.

"Oh stop talking Dou and go to sleep!" Rin yawned against and turned onto her side, "goodnight, Sesshomaru-sama. I promise I'll never kiss you again," she pat his fur.

If Rin didn't know any better she could have sworn she heard laughter coming from inside of the ribcage of the giant white dog. It was almost as if he was saying, _yes you will. And next time it will be on my terms._


	9. Flying

**This one is for Lucy :)...technically their love story is in Sesshomaru's Heart. These drabbles are meant to be short. So just for you I am editing Sesshomaru's Heart, making the chapters longer and adding in more scenes of Ri as a teen before they cement their relationship.**

**Flying**

"Rin pay attention," Kaede snapped at the young girl.

Rin was fifteen. Her knees were sore, her arms were tired. They had been with Arakawa-san for three days now waiting for her to birth her baby. The labor was long and painful. Kaede-sama suspected twins. Rin tried to adjust her stance so her knees burned less. They were both huddled between the poor woman's legs as she shrieked in pain. Rin was distracted, Sesshomaru-sama should be landing any moment. It was his first visit after the debacle of her kissing him on a dare. _He's going to hate me, I can't believe he is coming back. _Rin rubbed her back, "ouch," she mumbled to herself. "The baby isn't coming like this Kaede-sama, another walk?"

"No, you are forgetting something, listen to the next contraction," Kaede corrected her tersely. _Distracted child, you'll see Sesshomaru-sama on time._

Rin moved her red sore knees out from underneath her and sat Indian style. Arakawa-san screamed again, "it hurts! It hurts!" Rin heard that from all the women, especially at the end when the baby crowned and stretched the sensitive skin below. It was like watching a cloth stretch and sometimes tear. She hated the ones that tore.

"Where is Kagome-sama?" Rin asked, she knew how to fix the tears.

"At home resting, the doctors in her time told her she needed to stay off her feet," she told Rin.

Arakawa-san shrieked again, "listen Rin," Kaede elbowed her.

Rin complied, the voice went high, but then it pitched low at the end, changing to a growl, "she's pushing."

"Yes," Kaede told her.

"But shouldn't we move her, wouldn't it happen faster if we get her on her hands and knees? Or at least squatting?" Rin offered. She dipped a wash cloth into warmed herbal oil and held at Arakawa's center. The mother looked at Rin grateful for the relief, "just breathe Arakawa-san, the baby will be here soon," Rin didn't particularly want to be at this birth.

"If you want to brace her that's your prerogative, I'm an old woman Rin, my back and knees can't do it anymore," Kaede followed Rin's cloth with one that had sat in hot water.

Rin forced herself up. Grateful to stretch her legs. She rubbed her eyes, three days, she was exhausted. "I'm going to help you up," she told the birthing woman. Rin lifted her onto her haunches and braced the woman against her knees so she was squatting. Rin knew it did the trick the low pitched growling doubled and became non-stop. Arakawa-san strained, cried and then Rin saw the head peeking out from between her legs quickly followed by shoulders and the body. Rin's favorite part was finding out if the baby was a boy or a girl. This one was a girl. She helped Arakawa-san down as Kaede wrapped the baby in a blanket and set it on her chest.

"Rin another one," Kaede called her.

Rin immediately took the little girl from her mother's arms, "I'll put her in the basket," she said. She wrapped the baby in warm furs and set her inside the nearing basket. She ran back to Arakawa-san and lifted her up on her haunches bracing her one more time while she pushed out the second baby. This one was a boy. Rin and Kaede finished by helping the mother latch the babies. These were her fourth and fifth children, she was skilled at the task. Rin wiped her front and back then asked, "can I go now? The sun is setting."

"Go on child I can do the rest," Kaede shook her head, _how long is it going to take those two to see what everyone else does?_

Rin ran from the hut. Her feet rebelled against her. They blistered in pain. She didn't have shoes or tabi on. The hill was the same one he always landed on. It was either there or by her hut, but that only happened when he knew she was there. The hut she was at was on the other side of the forest. They hadn't even brought their horses. She continued on, jumping over fallen branches and tree trunks, across large boulders, over a brook and landed in a heap in the bushes, just as she saw the flash of white light. "I'm coming," she said more to herself than to Jaken, Sesshomaru-sama and Aun who landed. She came limping from behind the trees. She hoped Sesshomaru-sama didn't see how tired she was. She wanted to sleep for the next two days to make up for the three nights she lost.

As she came from the bushes she looked down at herself. "I probably stink," she said rolling her eyes.

Sesshomaru turned around with an entertained look on his face, "you came from a birthing?"

"Yes," she said.

"You are bleeding," he said quietly.

Rin glanced at her feet, "I forgot my shoes," she picked one up and touched the sole of her foot. There was a small cut down the ball of her left foot.

Sesshomaru knelt down and held her foot in his hand. He licked his thumb lightly and ran it over the cut on her foot. She felt instant relief, "sit," he told her.

Rin lowered herself grateful to be able to rest. "How did you know I was at a birthing?"

"It has its own smell," he said quietly joining her in the grass.

"I'm sorry," she apologized.

"It's a pleasant smell," Sesshomaru admitted, "new life." His eyes seemed far away as they spoke the last words.

"Even human life?" Rin wondered.

"He wouldn't have said it, if it wasn't what he meant silly girl," Jaken sat down with them.

"Useless toad," Rin shot back.

"Little wench," he threw the words at her.

"Tiny maggot," Rin raised an eyebrow challenging him.

"Witch," he snorted.

"Coward," she glared.

"Enough," Sesshomaru raised a hand. "Boy or girl?" He asked Rin.

"Both," Rin smiled, "twins," she yawned.

"You need to sleep Rin," Jaken said kindly.

"I'll be fine," she lied stretching. "Tell me about your travels, where did you go this time?"

Sesshomaru immediately shot a look at her that screamed he knew different. "West," he answered plainly.

"To your father's lands?"

"They are no longer his lands, Kensaku another Inu-Yokai, is the new Lord of the West," Sesshomaru spoke, "to Bukoseno."

"I remember that forest, with all the old magnolia trees," Rin grinned. "Did you walk or fly?"

"Fly."

"I wish I could fly," she said softly picking at the skin on her feet.

"Stupid girl you've flown on Aun many times!" Jaken protested vehemently.

"Stupid gizzard," Rin rolled her eyes, "every time I fly it's on something or someone else that can fly! I mean that, I want to know what it's like to fly, and not have anything underneath me."

Sesshomaru's ears twitched. He thought for a few moments how to accomplish the feat of Rin flying, "get on Aun," he barked at her.

The moment Rin stood her feet faltered underneath her. She tripped over Nintojo, crushed Jaken's head and would have landed on her face if Sesshomaru hadn't grabbed her by the arm, "perhaps you should sleep."

"But you leave in the morning," she said defeated, "I'm fine, I can sleep after."

He nodded. He held Rin's arm as he led her to the two headed dragon. Jaken stayed behind. As they were nearing the dragon Rin looked down at Sesshomaru-sama feet. He wore the same black Chinese flavored shoes he always did, "Sesshomaru-sama?"

"What is it?" He asked as Rin climbed onto Aun's back.

"Do you have toes?" Rin covered her mouth before she could giggle. She truly wondered if he had toes, or if he had paws hiding under those shoes like Shippo.

He quirked an eyebrow at her while he and Aun rose into the air, "toes."

"Can I see them?" She dared to ask.

Sesshomaru turned away from Rin pursing his lips to avoid smiling. He motioned Aun higher and higher until the ground below disappeared and all they could see was the topography of the land. The trees were as small green broccoli puffs. The river that ran through the village was like a brush stroke of blue ink. The fields were a luscious greens with patches of yellow from the thirsty ground and there were rich patches of brown where the gardens were growing.

Sesshomaru glided in the air. He sat down next to Rin on Aun and lifted up one of his feet. He reached underneath the white hem of his haori and pulled his shoe off. Underneath were pristine white tabi that looked and smelled like they had never been worn. Rin watched excited as the shoe came off. Underneath was a human foot with slightly elongated nails. Over the tops of his feet were the same matching magenta stripes as his face. Rin reached out a finger. She ran it along the stripe of his foot.

"Don't touch my foot," he pushed her hand off.

She rolled her eyes at him, "I thought you would have paws like Shippo."

He shook his head as he put his tabi and shoe back on.

"Are your feet ticklish? She asked Sesshomaru.

Instead of answering he shoved Rin off Aun's back. She flipped backwards off the saddle over the other side shrieking. At first she was terrified until she remembered why he had brought her up in the first place. She looked at the fast approaching ground, the wind whipped at her clothes, it took her breath away. She flattened her body out laughing, her arms extended to the sides her legs slightly spread. She shrieked in joy just as Sesshomaru flew beneath her. He slowed her descent with his own body, his stomach against her chest. His right hand slid up her back catching her. He blasted her through the air making her stomach feel sick. He set her on Aun's back. "Again," Rin grinned. She wiggled in the saddle getting ready, "catch me Sesshomaru-sama," she giggled and fell backwards off the saddle again.

She laughed all the way down feeling the wind whip at her skin and lick at her clothes. Her plain blue kimono with white stripes flittered in the wind. Sesshomaru caught her by flying beneath and sliding his hand up her back. Rin saw something in his eyes, something that made his face look softer than usual. Rin smiled at him, then choked when he yanked her back up to the saddle.

The moment she touched the saddle, she flipped over the side again. This time she wanted to do something different. As she fell she rolled like a log with her arms outstretched. She couldn't stop laughing at the exhilarating feeling. After several minutes Sesshomaru was slowing her fall again. Rin felt her heart flutter gazing into his eyes. She touched his face then continued log rolling. Sesshomaru followed suit, he swirled around her body moving with her. He took his time catching her, then bolted back to Aun who waited above. "This is fun," Rin said as they flew.

If he was having fun, Rin couldn't quite tell.

She landed in the saddle, breathing quickly. She pushed her feet onto the top of the saddle. She tried standing and nearly lost her balance. The moment she fell forward, Sesshomaru caught her hand. He helped her up. She glanced at him and below. She jumped and turned like a helicopter. The wind flapped at her arms. She flattened her body out in time to see Sesshomaru next to her. He flew spread eagle keeping Rin close. He reached out his hand to her. She grasped his fingers, they intertwined in his hand. She couldn't help but smile. He pulled her beneath him so her back was against his chest. He grasped her other hand, lacing his fingers between hers. He let his nose dip into the fine hair on the nape of her neck. She felt his breath against her skin. His left hand slid down her back and around her stomach. Rin turned her head to the side, his hand felt so warm in hers. She felt sparks flying between them. She felt butterflies in her stomach.

Sesshomaru pulled them up and flew with them back to stomach in long luxurious circles around the village. "It's like I'm a bird," she tightened her hold on his fingers. "Thank you," she whispered.

"You're welcome," he flew her back to Aun. This time he sat next to her in the saddle. Sesshomaru stared at his hand, feeling like it was betraying him. He had not held her hand since she was a child, it didn't feel the same. The skin was harder, there were more lines. He turned it palm up, there were callouses on her palms. He scraped them with his nail. "You're hands are not soft anymore."

"I have a lot responsibilities here," she said. Rin yawned with a wide mouth. She leaned onto his shoulder with the mokomoko looped around it. The moment her head touched his shoulder, drowsiness flooded into her body.

"These responsibilities, do they make you happy?" He asked.

"I guess," she sighed yawning. "I might fall asleep if we stay here longer."

"The sun is setting," he pointed ahead of them, "watch the clouds below us."

Rin glanced down, "they look like gold."

He pointed again, "the horizon."

"Purple and pink, but they're brighter than when you see them from below," she nuzzled the fur of is mokomoko. She couldn't stop her body from falling asleep. Her eyes shut against her will. She became limp.

Sesshomaru wrapped his arms around Rin. He pressed his lips to her forehead, "silly girl," he nuzzled her sleeping nose. He lifted her into his arms and flew towards her hut. He landed without a noise on the porch. He brushed pass the door flap.

"Is she okay?" Kaede came rushing forward.

"She fell asleep," Sesshomaru informed the old woman. He set her down on her futon in the back of the hut and covered her with blankets. He let one finger linger by the warmth of her mouth, he was not yet ready to tell her, that he wished to feel those lips again. "Sleep well, Rin."

**Lucy **Here you go! Hope you lliked it

**guest **You're welcome! I had actually already started writing that one. It was in Sesshomaru's Heart and I always wanted to write make it longer. A note about Trafficked is on the previous chapter.


	10. Let's Talk About Sex Baby

**Okay this was a fun fan request :). Beware of Lemons. Technically I stole this scene from Sesshomaru's Fear when Rin is remembering the second time they made love. It was a very clipped version, this is a longer version where Rin and Sesshomaru discuss his previous sexual partners and Rin's insecurity. Remember at the end of Sesshomaru's Heart while Rin was facing off with the Bear demon she was thrown back first into the wall of the cave. While she was still full of adrenaline she didn't notice the pain she was in. After the battle and after Sesshomaru found her in the mountains, her back was badly bruised. Imagine that her back is entirely covered in black, blue and purple bruises. It's difficult for her to move. Sesshomaru cannot heal it because the wounds aren't open. He took her to the hot springs and Sakura tree where their house now stands. It was the same field where he played with her as a child letting her fly in on his back and the same sakura tree he held her under when he thought she would die from pneumonia. It's a very sentimental place for them.**

**And AHHHH LETS CELEBRATE 30 REVIEWS! THIS IS THE MOST I GOT ON ANY STORY. Think we can get me to forty? It doesn't matter if you have an account or not let me know what you think. Leave me requests and I will try to write them. I still need to write Yuki's love story but I think that needs to be it's own story.**

**Let's Talk About Sex Baby**

It was the strangest feeling that first morning to wake up next to Sesshomaru. Her back still ached terribly from the bear yokai throwing her against the wall of the cave. When her eyes opened and she attempted to move, she felt less pain than she had the day before. She knew it was from the long soak in the hot springs before. The moon shown down on her and Sesshomaru. _Is it still night? _Rin wondered how long she had slept this time. _Did I sleep for days again? _

Next to her she found a wooden water jug, figs, nuts, berries and two cooked fish on a skewer next to a fading fire. The embers were black and grey. They barely gave off any heat. She blinked and rubbed her eyes, wondering if she had dreamt Sesshomaru finding her against the tree in the mountains. She wondered if she had dreamt what had happened, after the soak in the hot springs. She had never done that before. If Kaede-sama knew what she and Sesshomaru-sama did, she would be in for it. As her mind came out of the fog of sleep, she felt a small soreness between her legs. _Kami, I really did that with Sesshomaru-sama, I mean Sesshomaru. He said to call him Sesshomaru. _

As she tried to get up, there was a magenta striped arm wrapped around her waist and her legs were entangled with someone else's. She looked down and almost wanted to giggle. He had stripes over the tops of his feet and his toenails ended in points similar to his fingernails. When she thought about his hands she blushed, _oh what he did with those hands._ Her back was pressed into his side as he slept on his back. She turned to get a better view of his face. The Dai-yokai was breathing peacefully in a deep sleep. They were both wrapped in his white and red haori. She was still cushioned thickly by his white fluffy mokomoko. Rin giggled quietly, trying her best not to wake him. She stroked the fur of his mokomoko, _it's so soft. _She nuzzled it with her nose. Sesshomaru's breathing changed for a moment before it became deep and even again. _I should let him sleep. Kami, I'm still naked! _Her mind screamed at her, when she lifted the Haori, _and so is he._ She swallowed hard, staring at his naked body, the man, or demon was like a dream. His body was chiseled and firm. Everywhere a line could exist he had one. Even his lines had lines. _If Jaken-sama saw us now…_she could only imagine what the green imp would say, _he would never debase himself with a human, _she rolled her eyes. As they rolled from one side of her head to the other she noticed is silky silver hair splayed around them. She picked up a bunch and ran her fingers over the baby fine hair. _He's perfect. _She grinned, she had never thought she would be able to be this close to him. He was always so aloof before, so beyond.

Rin pushed herself up so she could glimpse his face. His eyes were closed, and as of yet, it didn't seem like he noticed her moving. She forced herself up wincing as she did. Her back didn't like the motion of sitting upright. She held the haori to her chest with one hand, trying to cover her breasts. _Do I really need to? He already saw them, he even put them in his…._she flamed red again. It covered her face, exploded in her cheeks and blistered down her back and shoulders. Rin decided she would explore him more while he slept. She traced the moon on his forehead, and tenderly stroked the stripes that painted his cheeks. Gingerly she placed a timid kiss on cheek. His skin was warm against her lips. For a moment she rested her head against his neck and ran her hand across his chest.

"You're awake," he said as a smile broke across his face. Rin's expanded. He never smiled, not unless he was going to kill someone, or he thought no one was looking. His eyes remained closed. He tightened his hold on her stomach.

Rin smiled, "so there is something besides battle that makes you smile," Rin wanted to test this closeness that was between them. She shifted her weight onto one arm and brushed his bangs from his eyes. When he didn't stop her, she kissed his lips, they were warm and inviting. He returned the kiss opening his mouth for her, darting his tongue into her mouth. His hand ghosted up her back careful to avoid causing her pain. "Mmmh," she sighed breaking the kiss, "how long did I sleep this time?"

"One day," Sesshomaru opened his eyes lazily. He turned onto his side, "and yes, the warmth of a woman always makes me smile. Eat and drink. When you are done I will take you back to the hot springs."

"So, any woman would make you smile?" Rin flinched in pain trying to turn around, "ow," she held her side. It was like her legs didn't want to work. She felt Sesshomaru scoot closer to her. He lifted her up slightly off his mokomoko. She rotated herself to face her food. She began with the fish.

He stroked her hair behind her shoulders, "not any woman, my woman," he placed his haori over her shoulders leaving him completely exposed. He helped her put her arms inside.

"Your woman?" Rin giggled, "um, Sesshomaru?" She was holding herself up excruciatingly with one arm and attempting to eat with the other. "Can…" she stopped, she didn't know if she could ask him to help her sit up.

"What do you need my Rin?" He sniffed her the curve of her neck, "you're in pain? Is it difficult to sit up?"

She nodded.

Sesshomaru sat up behind her and pulled her back against his chest, "lean against me." He laced his arms around her waist. He stroked her hair and rest his mouth on her shoulder. "Eat, I can already see your ribs," he poked them lightly, making Rin laugh.

As soon as she did she regretted it. The second her back tightened she nearly buckled over again, "ow," she held her side, "don't make me laugh."

She felt him pull back the haori in a finger, "it's still bruised badly."

"Jinenji would probably have something to put on it to help."

"In a few days, I will send for Jaken," he nuzzled her shoulder.

Rin nearly blanched, "but then, he'll know that we and…oh my," she covered her eyes.

Sesshomaru moved them from her face, he had his own curious look about his countenance, "know that you are bound to this Sesshomaru? This," he smelled her shoulder again, "embarrasses you?"

"Well, um, you were my first and it's not like I have been with men before, well you weren't the first to put your hand up there does that count?"

Sesshomaru's eyes darkened, "Kohaku touched you?"

"Yes, we, well," she could see the anger and possessiveness practically boiling like hot honey in his eyes. "It was only a few times."

"I should end his life," Sesshomaru growled. His arms tightened. Rin felt small pin-pricks from his fangs against her shoulder.

"You said you would become more possessive," she rolled her eyes. She opened the figs he brought her, and ate them. "It's not like I was your first. Are you biting me?" Sher rolled the shoulder against his mouth.

"Yes," he chuckled in her ear, "do you not like it?"

"Is it a dog demon thing?" She almost started laughing again, this time she stopped herself for fear of the pain coming back.

"Yes. I have been told, in the weeks following a bonding there is a need to be close." He scooted closer to Rin. She tilted her neck to the side, he lowered his mouth on it nibbling on her supple skin.

"It feels nice," she smiled, "thank you," she tried to embrace him from behind, "for being here with me."

"There is also a need to tend," he stroked her cheek, "if you have a need, I would hear it. In your current state I assume you will need much tending."

"The great Sesshomaru-sama is going to _tend _a human?"

"I've tended you in the past," he sniffed her neck again, "you're emotions are erratic."

Rin reached for the water bottle and took a deep drink. She resumed snacking on some of the food she found around her. She was surprised the fish tasted so good and wondered who had caught and cooked it. "Did you?"

Sesshomaru nodded. He put his chin on Rin's shoulder. He slid the haori off her shoulder revealing the joint of her collar bone on her shoulder. Rin felt heat radiating from between her thighs again. His lips came down on shoulder. "Did you think this Sesshomaru didn't know how to find human food?"

"You usually made Jaken do it." She turned her head to look into his eyes but was immediately faced with his lips only millimeters from her own. It seemed like he was waiting for something, Rin couldn't quite figure it out. She saw disappointment in his eyes when she lifted the skewer of fish to her mouth again. "Hey!" She protested.

Sesshomaru put it down, he cupped her face in one hand, his thumb slid up jaw bone towards her ear. He warmed her mouth with his own, he teased her mouth open wider, "I see I have much to teach you."

Rin pursed her lips and wrinkled her eyebrows, "teach me?"

He nodded, "that was a clear invitation to kiss this Sesshomaru."

"It was?" Rin blushed. She elbowed his stomach, "well how am I supposed to know, some of us haven't been with how many demonesses? I assume I am the first human you ever had sex with!" She wasn't sure if she should be offended at his words.

Sesshomaru closed his mouth tightly. Entertainment played across his eyes.

"How many?"

"You think I kept track?" He drew circles in the dirt with the tip of his index finger.

"Estimate. It's not like I never saw you when I was a child, you didn't even bother to take all of your clothes off," she picked up the water bottle again.

"Why would I let the unworthy touch the body of this Sesshomaru?"

"So I'm worthy?"

"More than," he brought his face close to Rin's, his eyes full of expectation. He cocked an eyebrow at her.

"I should kiss you?" She giggled holding her fish skewer. "Okay, I'm probably not very good at-"

His lips flew against hers before she could finish the sentence. His mouth pushed hers wider, his tongue dappled in and out of her mouth. She attempted to copy the motion feeling like a clumsy eel. Her hand rose to touch his chin. She ran her thumb over the dip in his chin, "exceptional," he pecked her lips. "Continue eating."

"How many?" Rin asked again, half not wanting to know. She finished on skewer of fish and began on the other.

He shrugged his shoulders.

"Okay," she bit into the still warm fish, "how old were you the first time?"

He closed his eyes thinking, "perhaps a little over three hundred and fifty. Physically I was as a fourteen or fifteen year old."

"Who was she?" Rin's stomach pitched.

"Why?" Something in his mind was tickling him. She was curious but he could feel a sense of hurt that was not his own. "Does it bother you?"

"Maybe," Rin whispered.

"In what way?"

"Because they're probably better at it than me, and they're demonesses not humans. Who knows what Jaken is going to say when he finds out and how am I going to explain this to Kaede-sama, we aren't ma-" his lips were on hers again, stopping her talk.

Sesshomaru pulled away holding a finger to her lips, "Jaken will die if his words are anything but pleasing. As for Kaede, she need not know at this time. Privacy, I crave privacy with you. As for skills, you did well for your first time. This Sesshomaru was satisfied. Were you satisfied?"

"I think so, can't you tell? I hear about it all the time that men can tell," she was starting to feel hot and bothered again. She wiggled uncomfortably against his mokomoko.

"I am not a man. It was obvious, your body responded as expected," he chuckled. He ran a crooked finger up and down her arm.

"Did you just laugh?" Rin paled, "you can laugh?"

"I am capable of humor," he boasted, "I see no use in it. You are having an unexpected effect on this Sesshomaru."

"I like it, Sesshomaru-sa," she was interrupted with a clawed finger against her lips again.

He shook his head, "Sesshomaru. You are no longer the little girl who followed in my footsteps. I have tasted your skin, our souls are bound together as one. You will call me, Sesshomaru."

"Really?" It would take some getting used to.

"Sesshomaru, say my name."

"Sesshomaru," she grinned like the teenager she was, "Sesshomaru," his fingers pulled her hair into a tail at the nape of her neck and ran down her back. She covered her mouth, giggling.

He took her hand down, "I love your smile, let me see it," he watched her eyes light up, he listened to the sound of her laughter, "beautiful."

"Are all Inu-yokai this affectionate?"

"We crave physical closeness. As children we sleep in groups. The Western Lands, where Chichiue raised me had many children. We slept together in large beds. My father's family lived in the same home. All of the young ones shared a bed. Parents hold their children and carry them on their backs until they are old enough to defend themselves."

"When is that?"

"Around two hundred, we age much slower, we don't come of age to find our soulmates until four hundred. What am I smelling? I feel something that is not mine," he touched the back of his head, "it's as if fear, nervousness and embarrassment have combined."

"You can feel my emotions? I thought only when I held the sword?" Rin asked him.

"Our soul is one, vaguely, I can feel what you feel, what is it?" He looked concerned.

"You were only with yokai before?"

He nodded.

"So I am the first human?"

"You will be the only human. What is this feeling called?"

Rin knew what it was, she lowered her eyes. She fingered the fluff of his mokomoko.

"Rin," he wrapped his arms around her again, his voice was commanding, "what is it called? I do not suffer from such a feeling."

"Insecure," she whispered.

"You do not feel secure in my love for you? Our bond ensures security."

"It's not that," she bit down on her bottom lip, "you've been with a lot of women and you're practically the son of a king and one of the most powerful yokai of the age and I'm just me and don't kiss me," she put her hand up to block his mouth, "let me finish. Sometimes humans need to say what is bothering them to make a negative feeling go away. Are you sure I'm the right one for you?"

"My instinct would not have bonded you otherwise," he moved her hand down, "insecure?"

"Yes," she tried to smile.

"I should have held you more as a child," his voice lowered to a whisper, "I should have carried you on my back. You should have slept in my arms more often. You would not feel this _insecure_ if you knew how loved you were."

"Even then?" Rin tried to imagine him carrying her around on his back in his human form.

"Even then," he brought one of her hands to his bare chest, "you warmed my heart."

Rin smiled.

"This Sesshomaru loves you," he pulled Rin into another embrace. He pressed his lips against hers, "you are my heart."

She lowered his hand to her stomach, she had to ask again, "what if I'm pregnant now?"

"Then I will be proud you are powerful enough to carry my child," he assured her. "I do not like this _insecure_. Stop feeling it."

"Who was she, the first one? Do you remember her?"

He sighed, "will telling you this remove this _insecure_?"

Rin shrugged her shoulders.

"Yasuko."

Rin turned her head, "and?"

"And?"

"How old was she?"

"Over seven hundred," a guilty grin crossed his face, "I was young to begin. She was the daughter of one of Chichiue's allies. She had an interesting smell I had not been around before. It drew me in, and she led the way, much like I led you. Strange that telling you this makes _insecure_ go away. It was a pleasant experience. She was very skilled in pleasing this Sesshomaru."

Rin blushed.

"You will learn," he poked her side tenderly, "you were very nervous. I was unsure how painful it would be for a virgin human."

"Is it painful for female yokai?" That perked Rin's ears up.

"Very," he shook his head, "it's why I severed your virginity rather than breaking it with pressure. The symbol is thicker on female yokai."

"So you've been with a virgin before?"

"Many," he regretted saying it. "Why does this bother you? It benefited your experience."

Rin huffed, "I suppose that is a good point."

"You're smell is more intoxicating," he held Rin closer to him.

"You won't seek anyone else out now that we're bonded?"

"No," Sesshomaru told her confidently, "you are mine. Urges begin the same physically as they do for humans. I assume they feel the same way. You will satisfy my urges now and I yours. No others."

"How strong are these urges?"

"You must remember I am Inu-yokai, we have very strong sexual urges. I obviously did not do enough to shield your eyes from them when you were a child. My instinct tells me to hold you close to me now, to keep you in my sight, to satisfy you. You will always be able to tell me no, and I will stop at your request. You will tell me if I am hurting you and I will help you enjoy it."

"Sesshomaru," she gulped. All this talk of love making was getting her extremely hot and bothered. She took a deep breath. Her breathing became heavier. Her thighs were practically burning with desire.

"What is it?" He _was_ smiling. His eyes were very predatory, taking in her body. He was already toying with her hair, twirling it in his fingers. She had never seen a smile touch his eyes before, never seen him look amused the way he did staring at her.

Rin didn't know what to do, he had led the way the night before. She lowered her head touching her forehead against his. His breath was hot, just inches from her mouth. She kissed his lips, he returned the kiss with the same intensity. He cupped her face. She slid her tongue into his mouth. She pulled away enough to break the kiss. Her mouth remained only millimeters from his, "um," she held his face, "can I touch your fangs?"

He laughed again, a sound Rin was beginning to enjoy hearing, "they won't hurt you." He opened his mouth.

She touched the upper fangs with her index finger, "they feel sharp," she scoot closer to him, "can you help me turn around? I can barely sit up."

He lift her up from under the arms. He used his mokomoko beneath her to move her around until her front was facing his. She leaned against him. He sat entertained, her aroma filling his nose. He knew exactly what she wanted, he was just waiting to see what she would do with what she felt. "Do you want to rest?"

"I want…um," she tried to steady her breathing, "can I touch you?"

"You're touching me now," he reminded her.

"I mean here," she lowered her hand to the solid member that had been pressing against her back. She ran her hand over the tip.

"Mmmh," he sighed into her mouth, "touch me," he helped her hands wrap around him, "like before." He groaned against her lips, "firmer," he encouraged her. His stomach was tightening with need, his lower back aching for release. Low rumbles escaped his throat.

She wrapped her arms around his neck. "Can we?" She kissed his neck, then his collar bone. She nipped at it lightly the way he had done on her shoulder. He seemed almost offended.

"Harder, you may bite harder."

She tried again, clamping down on the skin over the bone until she felt her jaw hurt. She was rewarded with his hand feathering through her hair and more of the low rumbles he was making in his chest. He lay back enjoying the sensations. Rin nipped and kissed along his check. Her back rebelled against her, as she licked his pecs, and then ran her nose against the muscles of his stomach. She watched as his muscles twitched as she worked her way to his navel, slowly lapping a circle around it.

"Take it off," he sat up and removed his haori from her shoulders. She blushed again. He suppressed the need to grin at her innocence. "Continue," He gave her head a gentle push urging her on.

Rin glanced up seeing ecstasy in his eyes. His fingers gripped the dirt on his sides. She paused stroking his firmness. She looked up at him, he nodded. She had an urge to put him in her mouth. He seemed to want her too. She kissed the tip, encircling it with her mouth. She licked the skin of the bottom. She felt intense pleasure radiate within herself pleasuring him like this. He was warm and hard in her mouth. She suckled the tip.

Rin was excited to watch his back arch in pleasure. "Rin," he sat up quickly and pulled her face to his, he was breathing hard. "You please this Sesshomaru. Again."

"My backs getting tired," she admitted sadly, "I can use my hand again."

"My Rin," he embraced her tightly as if the warmth of his chest could remove the pain she felt in her back.

"Ow, not so tight," she cried against his shoulder.

"Can you lay down on your back?" He adjusted his mokomoko to cushion her.

"I can try, help me?" She held onto is shoulders as he lovingly lay her down against the white fluff. She groaned in comfort, "it's so soft."

"I know," he let the back of his hand run from her navel up to her breast. He touched her nipple with his thumb. He smiled in her eyes again. He let his mouth fall on her neck. She held his face, inviting him to continue circling her skin with tongue. He traveled down her neck, stopping to taste the tips of her mounds. He clamped down firmly, her back arched into his mouth, "good," he said more to himself than to her. He kissed the line of muscles down the center of her stomach. He let his tongue trace the milky white skin, "you're so strong." His hands ran up the sides of her stomach and back down feeling her defined body. He kissed her hips, underneath her navel and then stopped at her center. He ran one hand over her lower lips. She grabbed his shoulders. "Eyes open," he reminded her, "let me see your enjoyment."

"What are you doing," her legs were rigid.

"Open your legs," he lift them up and lowered himself between them, "something new," he looked mischievous.

"What?" She said nervously, "oh," her back arched into his mouth.

He parted her petals. He nudged her swollen bud with his nose first breathing in the sweet scent of her heat. He let his tongue press against it, he flattened it out and licked and flicked. Her fingers squeezed tighter into his shoulders, her moans intensified. "You like this," his voice was deep and seductive.

"Yes, oh…Sesshomaru," she widened her legs. "Please inside…it burns."

He inserted one long finger than a second, pumping them firmly within her. She flinched at the invasion at first, they felt that much harder inside of her out of the water. "Relax," he reminded her. His tongue continued along her bud, flicking pressing. He added sucking and kissing.

"Sesshomaru?" She was becoming desperate. The pleasure nearly felt like pain. It lit into her stomach, heating a fire between her legs.

"Shh," he comforted her, "you're almost there."

"Almost where? OH!" She cried out, the last nudge of his tongue sent shock waves up her spine, down her legs, into core. Her entire body shook in pleasure, "Oh…uh!"

He held his thumb against her feeling her pulsing, letting it continue until she was weak against his mokomoko. "There," he rose and lovingly kissed her mouth, he held the kiss with his thumb rolling slowly, she broke it to moan. "It's your peak," he caressed her chin, "you will help me reach mine now." He pulled her legs around his waist.

Rin gazed up at him in adoration, "why do you always make sure I feel it first?"

"Because I love you, and it makes this," he nudged his way inside of her, one small thrust at a time, "easier." He plunged himself deep within her. She gasped with eyes wide open. Her nails dug into his shoulders. He stopped for a moment and smelled her neck, she was only slightly scared but there was a different scent there he had not smelled before. "Alright?" He held himself up with a hand on either side of her.

"It just hurt a little this time," she was breathing so hard he could see her breasts heaving. He bent over and teased one in his mouth until it was hard and pointed.

He lift the upper-half of his body up struggling to maintain control, "just relax, open for me," he took her legs and opened them wider. He slipped deeper within her. He caressed the inside of her thighs bringing the pulsing between her legs back. He slowly began moving within her, "is that better?" His eyes were focused, and boring into her, "does it feel good?"

"Yes," she panted.

"Move your hips with me," he pushed into her. As he did, he gripped hers and helped them meet his, "oh Rin, like that." He groaned into her neck.

This was what she wanted, to make love to him. The muscles in his arms tensed, he moved in and out of her in gentle strokes. He held her chin in his hand and wetted her lips with his own. Together they moaned in pleasure. She saw what he probably saw in her when she reached the phase of incoherence. His eyes flashed red for a brief moment. He held her hands above her head in his, kissing her neck. He panted against her neck. Almost inaudibly he spoke in her ear, "I love you, my Rin." Before she felt him burst within her. He stayed like that for several minutes, holding her hands and resting his face against her cheek.

Rin still could not believe those words, "I honestly feared you would be gone when I woke up." She admitted. She let her legs fall to the side.

Sesshomaru rolled onto his side, pulling her to his chest and took a deep breath, "you should know the ones who love the most, are often the most quiet. I don't speak idly and I do not lie. I told you I would not leave you until you are healed." He kissed Rin's hands, "I left you at Kaede's knowing that when you matured it would be your choice to come back to me, or to stay in a human village. That choice is still yours."

"I love you too," she sighed, exploring his hands, feeling his sharp claws, "I think that's why it was so hard to be around you the older I became. I didn't understand why my body was doing what it was. I felt warm, and my heart would pound and my face would flush. It didn't feel the way I should have felt and I thought you would never return my feelings, once I knew what they were. I want to stay with you once again," she turned to face him, "I want to explore what we have started."

"As do I," he sat up and cradled her in his arms. "You must speak if I hurt you, making love to a human is different than yokai."

"Because you have to be gentle?" She curled into his embrace.

He nodded.

"Why did your eye flash red again?"

"They did?" He frowned trying to recall the sensation he felt before he released himself inside of her.

"It's okay," she sighed exhausted, "my back is really starting to hurt."

"Come," he slid one arm under her shoulders and the other under knees, "you can rest in my arms in the hot springs."

"I may sleep in your arms."

"If that is your wish."

"Stay with me?"

He looked at her confused as he walked towards the warm water. He hovered over the water and slowly lowered himself in. His feet found the bottom. Rin curled into him as the warmth hit her skin. He found the ledge he sat on before with her in his arms. He sat down and maneuvered her onto her lap.

"Stay with me," she whispered half asleep again.

"Forever, my heart," he nuzzled her nose, he stroked her brow, "sleep."

"Stay with me," it was almost inaudible. Her eyes closed to tiny slits.

"I will be here when you wake," _she's exhausted. _He kissed her cheek, _heal my Rin. Heal._

**Guest:** _Ahhh you are right, there will be some insecurity that happens in instinct but not in the way you think. I can't wait for that story to progress :) _


	11. Jaken Finds Out

**This could have been funnier. I always wondered what Sesshomaru would say to Jaken after he took Rin as his. So this is it. Thank you to everyone who has reviewed this. I'm entirely too distracted from my class I am taking right now...I have about 18 days of freedom left before I start taking 3 classes and I will be on a writing hiatus after August 26th lasting until December 6th. If you have any requests please send them. :) Instinct is up and running if anyone is interested in reading it. **

**This takes place after Sesshomaru's Heart. Soft Lemon Warning**

**Jaken Finds Out**

Sesshomaru held Rin against his skin. She slept again. With her injury it seemed all she could do was sleep, eat and soak in the hot springs. For his part, Sesshomaru struggled to keep his hands off of her. They made love twice, he yearned for more. His yearning was staunched by the bruising on her back that was healing so slowly he wasn't sure how long they would be in this field by the hot springs. The day before Rin had tried to stand, her legs buckled beneath her the moment she put weight on them. He had to heft her into the bushes to relieve herself. Rin begged him to help her walk. He held the majority of her weight while she dragged her legs weakly in the dirt and grass. Rin settled for trying to stand, even that brought her to knees. He set her down on the ground and helped her lay on her side. She fell asleep almost as soon as her head touched the ground, "I'm sorry," Rin apologized, her voice fading as her eyes closed.

"I'm going to dress you," Sesshomaru helped Rin into her clothes. "I'll be back," he set her back down. He picked up his white haori with the red flowers on the sleeves, covering Rin up to the shoulders. He set her knife and sword next to her hand. He kissed her forehead. _Jinenji would have herbs that would help._ She was already sleeping soundly. He nuzzled the skin by her neck. She stirred lightly, then fell asleep again. He didn't feel proper leaving her alone like this. She was vulnerable, weak, unable to stand. He would have to be fast.

He flew into the air towards Kaede's village. He assumed that Jaken would have returned with them unable to find Sesshomaru. It was early morning, the sun was just beginning to rise. The sky was changing latently from midnight blue to light blue. Golden rays of sun peeked from the horizon. He landed in front of Kaede's hut. Aun's head perked up the moment his feet touched the ground. Sesshomaru responded by patting the dragon on their heads lightly. Jaken was inside, he could smell the green imp and hear him snoring against the wall. "Jaken!" He called.

Jake stumbled over his feet, tripped over Nintojo and ran out of the hut, "Sesshomaru-sama! You've been gone for days! Where have you been?"

"Go to the hanyou Jinenji, ask for herbs for a bruised human back," Sesshomaru instructed him. "Rin is hurt."

"Right away Sesshomaru-sama," Jaken ran down the wooden stairs of the hut.

"Jaken," Sesshomaru stopped him. "Do you remember the field of daisies?"

"Yes, Sesshomaru-sama?" Jaken turned around, there was something different about Sesshomaru's eyes. Jaken could see it, a softness that wasn't there before when he said Rin's name.

"Meet me there in two days," he told Jaken. "Bring Rin clean clothing, and supplies young women need."

"Yes, Sesshomaru-sama," Jaken tried to run off towards Jinenji's hut again only to get picked up the back of his brown robe and brought eye to eye with Sesshomaru.

"Rin is bound to this Sesshomaru," his voice grated.

"What?" Jaken's mouth fell open, "you bound Rin-chan?"

Sesshomaru dropped Jaken on the ground and flew into the air, ignoring the protests coming from below.

**Two days later…**

"Sesshomaru-sama!" Jaken screeched at the top of his lungs as he walked through the field searching for Sesshomaru.

"Oh…oh…," Rin's moaned as she rocked her hips against Sesshomaru's. She straddled his lap. He leaned against the Sakura tree, his hands gripping her breasts.

He pulled her mouth to his.

"Sesshomaru-sama!" Jaken shrieked again.

Sesshomaru's eyes flashed sideways, "shh," he put his hand on Rin's lips, he pant against her neck.

"Sesshomaru-sama!" Jaken yelled again.

"Shit! It's Jaken," Rin tried to get off Sesshomaru's lap and lunge for her clothes.

Sesshomaru caught her by the shoulder, he nuzzled her nose, he lifted his hips up to meet hers again, pushing himself back inside, "shh," he said again, "Jaken! No further!" He yelled.

"But he'll know we are…" Rin protested.

Sesshomaru held the back of her arms, "and that we will often," he held her hips in his hands, "mmh," he ran his hands up into her hair, he pulled her mouth back to his. He lips fell down her neck, he lifted one of her firm breasts into his mouth. "We will finish."

"Oh," Rin sighed holding his shoulders. She rolled her hips against his again. She held onto his shoulders while he pressed his hips into hers. She grinned into his neck, she felt his liquid flush into her thighs.

"Umo…Sesshomaru-sama!" Jaken called.

"I'm going to kill him," Sesshomaru whispered into Rin's neck. He pulled her against his chest, she was covered in sweat.

"Maybe we should ask what he wants?" Rin said softly. "Give me your haori," she reached towards it, her hand coming up short.

He shook his head, pulling Rin defensively closer to him.

"Sesshomaru-sama what should I do with Rin's clothing?" Jaken's voice came tumbling over the hills again.

"He's going to see me naked, on your lap! He sounds closer," Rin tried to get up again.

Sesshomaru shook his head again, he pulled Rin against his chest, "remain where you are."

"Why?"

"Sesshomaru-sama!" Jaken yelled.

"Shut up Jaken!" Sesshomaru bellowed over the field, "I will kill him."

"You'd have to let me off your lap to do that," Rin laughed lightly.

"Not yet," he pulled her closer. "Rest against me," he ran his hand over Rin's back.

Rin curled against him, "Sesshomaru?"

"Mmh?" He stroked her hair as she rest on his chest.

"Does he know about us?"

"Yes," Sesshomaru lifted her chin, "does this displease you?"

"No. I'm proud to be yours," she kissed the underside of his chin.

"As you should be," he said arrogantly.

"I need to lay down again. I'm hungry," she yawned in his ear.

"Lay on your stomach," he set her down on his inner layer chest down. He took his outer layer and covered her up to her waist, he ran a finger down her back, "this is taking too long, let me heal it."

"I thought you said you could only heal open wounds?" Rin asked him.

"I will open them," he placed light pressure with his claws against her skin, "then put my blood in."

"No!" Rin shrieked, "are you crazy?"

"It would be healed in hours?"

"And you would cut into my back!" She tried to scoot away from him.

"You don't want to heal?" Sesshomaru asked her.

"On my own," she set her head back down.

"Jaken!" Sesshomaru yelled at the imp, "bring the salves for Rin's back."

"Get dressed!" Rin yelled at him.

"Why?"

"Really?" Rin begged him, "put your hikama on."

Sesshomaru pulled his hikama on before Jaken came through the bushes with a jar in his hand. "Uh…Sesshomaru-sama?" Jaken held up the salve, "why are you on his clothes."

"Put the salve on her back," Sesshomaru commanded Jaken.

Jaken came forward quietly. He opened the jar and took some of the cream out. He climbed onto Rin's back and began spreading the cream over the bruises.

"Not a word," Sesshomaru barked at Jaken.

"Ow," Rin squirmed, "you're fingers feel like sticks Jaken," she rolled her shoulders.

"Stop fidgeting," Jaken rebuked her.

"Ow, you're scratching my skin!" Rin slapped at his hand.

"Stop moving," Jaken tried to sit on her hips.

"Get off me stupid toad!" Rin slapped at Jaken's face.

"Sesshomaru-sama told me to put this on you, silly girl!" He lost his footing.

"Ugly stinkpot!"

"Filthy wench, you smell!"

"Rotten knave!" Rin rolled over and threw him off her back. The haori fell of her back leaving her completely exposed. Rin squealed grabbing for Sesshomaru's haori. Her skin flushed red.

"Stupid imp," Sesshomaru took the salve from Jaken in the process throwing him several feet and sat down next to Rin. "Lay down," he supported her weight as she went back down on his inner layer. He dipped his fingers inside the cream and rubbed it into Rin's skin.

"Great now he saw me naked," Rin hid her face in her hands.

"He's seen you before," Sesshomaru reminded her.

"I was eight years old! I have breasts now-"

"Gorgeous breasts," Sesshomaru chuckled continuing the working on her back. "This salve reeks."

"It feels good, he used something like a mint root for the pain, I can smell it," Rin smiled.

"Uh, Sesshomaru-sama?" Jaken scuttled forward nervously. His eyes were covered.

"He said I smell," Rin whispered annoyed.

"Jaken, turn around," Sesshomaru growled at him. Jaken turned around, Sesshomaru pulled his Haori over Rin again. "Bring Rin clothing and," he sniffed the air, "soap."

"He brought me soap?"

"Yes, I asked Kaede what a young girl would need, she said you would like soap," Jaken said apologetically.

Rin smiled, "thank you Jaken-sama," she sighed, "Sesshomaru?"

"How dare you Rin!" Jaken fumed.

"Jaken," Sesshomaru barked at him.

"Yes, Sesshomaru-sama?" Jaken lowered his head.

"She is the soulmate of this Sesshomaru, perhaps you should call her Rin-sama," he cocked an eyebrow at Jaken.

"Rin-sama?" Jaken whined.

Rin covered her mouth laughing, "Rin is fine."

"Bring the clothing and leave us," Sesshomaru ordered him.

Jaken brought Rin a clean under layer and an outer layer. They were both soft yellows. He left a bag of what Kaede had said were women's essentials next to Rin, then at Sesshomaru's insistence left the area. "What were you going to ask?" Sesshomaru asked Rin.

"Do I smell?" Rin took her inner layer.

"Not to me," he tickled her cheek.

"Will you help me bathe?" She blushed.

"Still so shy?" He looped his hands under her arms and legs.

"Help me walk?" She pushed his wrist off her knees.

He nodded. "Take my haori off."

"But we actually need to make it to the hot springs this time," Rin flushed red again.

"If you weren't so attractive it wouldn't be so difficult for this Sesshomaru to keep his hands off you," he kissed her mouth, "and if you didn't taste so sweet. Ready?"

Rin nodded, "this is going to hurt." She braced herself. She forced herself off the ground. She leaned against Sesshomaru's open arm, she gripped his elbow, "your gorgeous," she chuckled as she limped towards the hot springs.

"I know," he said, "come," he supported her around the waist, "your steps are stronger."

"Jinenji's salves are powerful the swelling went down, you'll see, I'll be on my feet by myself in a few days," she lowered herself excruciatingly next to the hot springs. "Help me in?"

He removed his hikama. Rin blushed again. "We must work on this shyness."

Rin only laughed in return. She slid into the springs next to him. He pulled her into his lap, "we forgot the bag," Rin pointed to the brown bag.

"Jaken!" Sesshomaru yelled.

"Yes, Ses…" Jaken's eyes widened seeing them together in the hot springs. He shielded his eyes, "This Jaken's eyes are not worthy of seeing Sesshomaru-sama in this way!"

Rin hid her giggles in Sesshomaru's neck.

"Bring the bag to the edge of the hot springs, then leave us alone," Sesshomaru ordered him.

Jaken complied. He ran for the bag still shielding his eyes and carried it to Sesshomaru's waiting hand. Rin burrowed herself deeper into Sesshomaru's body when Jaken was near then relaxed when he left. "Whew," she sighed, "are you going to become cold and aloof again?"

"Not to you," he stroked Rin's cheek. He leaned her forward and inspected her back, "finally," he nuzzled the nape of her neck, "it's healing. How is the shoulder?" He ran his palm over her left shoulder blade.

"Still sore, I love you, Sesshomaru," she hugged him around the chest.

"And I you," he returned her embrace.

Jaken sat near the river staff in hand, thinking to himself. It had been a little more than a month since he had rejoined Sesshomaru-sama. Rin was now their constant companion again, but where they had left her a happy child in Kaede's village, she was now a woman. A woman that spent almost every night with Sesshomaru-sama while Jaken plugged his ears trying to ignore the grunts, growls, groans and moans he heard from the bushes where Sesshomaru-sama and Rin made camp. In the past they had all shared a fire, now Jaken spent the evenings with Aun who didn't speak at all. He was resolved to being Rin's guard during the day, as much as she no longer needed one. She had hid much of her true-self from Sesshomaru since turning twelve. Jaken couldn't fathom why she had not asked Sesshomaru to train her rather than Inuyasha and his group.

When evening fell, Sesshomaru took Rin's hand and led her to a group of trees where they were mostly hidden, and Jaken would be summarily dismissed. He spent the evenings contemplating his life, cleaning Aun, polishing his saddle, and thinking about where they would go the next day. This evening, Rin sat by Jaken's fire warming her hands. Sesshomaru-sama told them he went to hunt. Rin hadn't been feeling well, she asked for something more than fish, something tender. Jaken sat next to her, he blasted their camp fire with Nintojo again, "what's wrong girl? You're green around the gills."

Rin sighed, the flames flickered lightly. She held her hands close to their warmth, she pursed her lips, "why did Sesshomaru-sama hate Inuyasha so much in the beginning?"

"He's a hanyou, and Sesshomaru-sama's father died the day he was born. He fought a great dragon, then felt Izayoi calling him. He was killed by the Samurai Takemaru, you remember him?"

"I remember," she whispered. She held her stomach and groaned.

"What's wrong, Rin? This Jaken knows you, you're worried about something," Jaken walked over to her and set a small green hand on her shoulder. "I remember when we were the same size," he laughed.

"I think I'm pregnant," she said softly.

Jaken's eyes grew to the size of tennis balls and glazed over with specks of light, "with Sesshomaru-sama's baby?"

"Who's else would it be? Yours?" Rin didn't have the heart to smack him in the head. "I'm going to give him what he hates the most," she folded her knees into her chest.

Jaken became pensive, he understood Rin's dilemma, "you think he won't love his child?"

"I will never be able to give him a pure-blooded child, I'm human, what if this was a mistake?" She asked him.

"It wasn't. Inu-yokai are extremely picky about who they reproduce with, and who they bind themselves too. If his instincts didn't tell him that you were meant for him, he would not have bound himself to you. And even then, he loves you. You may not think I pay attention but I do. Ever since you were fifteen, things changed between you two. You fought more often to hide your feelings. Both of you were too stubborn to see what I saw. He was falling for you even then, he just needed time to sort out his feelings. I try not to hear what I hear at night, but he wouldn't share his body with you the way he does at night if his affections weren't there. He hunts for you, something he never did when you were a child. He holds you at night while you sleep, even though he doesn't need to. He makes sure you have the best clothing, enough food and spends more time talking to you than he has ever spoken to me. Tell him, Rin, his heart will be glad."

Rin nodded, she wiped a tear from her eyes, "sorry, I've been more emotional lately," she hugged Jaken.

"Let me go!" Jaken squirmed in her arms.

Rin dropped him, "does he want to be a father?"

"He never said anything to me, he will be happy Rin. Tell him."

"Tomorrow, promise me you won't say anything?"

"I won't. This Jaken is so happy! The child will put that hanyou Inuyasha to shame!"

"Thank you, Jaken-sama. I'm going to bed, ask him not to wake me?"

"You didn't eat," Jaken reminded her, "you should eat something."

"My stomach is too upset," she said quietly.

"He'll be back soon," Jaken reminded her.

"I'm tired," she stood up and walked through the bushes towards her furs. She lay down and pulled the furs over her shoulders. She fell asleep quickly, snuggled into her blankets.

Jaken heard rustling behind him, "where is Rin?" Sesshomaru returned with several rabbits in his hands.

"She went to sleep," Jaken informed him.

"Is she still unwell?"

"Yes," Jaken answered, "Sesshomaru-sama, I'll prepare these, go be with Rin." Jaken chuckled watching the emotions float in Sesshomaru's eyes. Anger at being told what to do, sorrow that she was asleep and he didn't get to spend time with her that evening, frustration that he had spent the time catching the rabbits and no one was there to appreciate it, then he smiled. Jaken never saw him smile unless he was going to kill someone, and here he grinned as he walked towards Rin. Jaken knew, long before they did what would happen, if they would have both just set their pride aside.

**Mirala: **_Yes please read the whole story. I have been revamping Sesshomaru's Heart to make it better and there are four stories that revolve around this one. I've actually been thinking while I write Instinct that if people haven't read the previous three and the drabbles they will be missing a lot!_

**Guest:** _Thank you!_

**Heartsonsleeve22:** _I know I love writing young Rin and Sesshomaru interactions too. It's fun thinking about what he was thinking, and how he may have been different with her in private than in public. Read Instinct, the idea of what happens without Rin becoming immortal is explored in this story and the story is about to explode. The next two chapters once I get them up on their are going to blow up :) I can't wait._


	12. Rin's First Pregnancy

**Now we go back in time. I'm going to leave this here for about 2 weeks then put it back where it belongs. This is just after the chapter where Rin and Jaken talk about her being pregnant. AKA this is her pregnancy with Yuki I needed fluff after this week. Holy cow. Beyond editing for my Beta-ees I haven't had much time to write. My family member that had surgery had some complications but thank Goodness is much better now. Unfortunately it's still making it impossible to spend a lot of quality time on my writing. I also am gearing up for school to start October 14th. As long as nothing goes crazy this time...I would expect slow updates from here on out, probably until December. **

**I have so many ideas for the Disease and my Reincarnation Story :). I keep writing them down but right now I'm focusing on finishing Trafficked which I also need to update. I have a half finished chapter for my Inu/Kag drabbles. Argh...I don't have the time I did this summer! (Throws a fit in the corner). **

**And to all those that keep asking that I write, don't worry I knew when I wrote Instinct it would make people frustrated, upset yada yada. It goes against anything that anyone else has written and I'm okay with that. It was awesome and emotional and took Sesshomaru on a roller coaster ride of feelings. I'm not going to stop writing because of some negative reviews. **

**Not that anyone has flat out asked this question but if you were wondering why I would let Natsuki live and keep her bond to Sesshomaru let me explain it. Everyone kept asking for a punishment to fit the crime. If you think about it, she had to wait for an extra 140 years for Rin to die. After Rin's death she's spent another 350 years living in Rin's shadow in a loveless relationship. So...personally I think that was definitely punishment. Death was too easy, breaking the bond just didn't seem like punishment enough because I couldn't make them fall in love with each other. She was too selfish and immature at the time. **

**Rin Tells Sesshomaru about Yuki's Pregnancy**

She had been acting strange for several days. He couldn't quite wrap his head around it. She was more tired than usual. She was falling asleep earlier in the evening. A few times she had even bowed out of hunting by his side. Something he knew she enjoyed immensely. She was eating less and heaving more often. He had heard of this human illness that made them expel what was in their stomachs. He had never heard of it lasting for so long. As he returned to camp with the rabbits that night, he passed them quietly to Jaken then strode to her side. She was already deep in sleep. She had not even bothered changing into a yukata. She wore the same teal kimono with her inner layer intact as she had been wearing that day. He couldn't tell if she was cold or warm. It was Fall, the leaves were changing. The air was cooler at night. She curled into a ball on her side.

They had gone two weeks prior to Kaede's village to retrieve her things. Rin was finally able to stand more comfortably on her own then. The pain of her back had finally vanished. She packed lightly. He still preferred she dressed nicely. He removed his armor leaving it standing next to a tree. He untied his yellow and purple obi, setting it and his katanas near where his head would rest. He removed his haori and inner layer, hanging them from the tree she had chosen to sleep beneath. He lifted the blankets she slept on and slid into the bedding next to her. He kissed her tired red cheeks and nuzzled her neck. He thumbed her cheek bone just under her eyes. She roused momentarily, her eyelids fluttering before falling asleep again.

"Sesshomaru-sama?" Jaken called from the bushes, where a low fire glowed. The air was filling with the savor of cooked meat.

"What?" He answered annoyed.

"She asked you not wake her," he could hear the imp cringing from words alone as Jaken cooked the rabbits over the fire.

Sesshomaru groaned laying on his back, putting one hand behind his head. He had wanted to do more than just lay next to her that night. Although, even in her sleep she gravitated to him. She had been on her side before facing away from him. She rolled over to her other side scooting closer. She wrapped her arm over his chest. Her nose found his skin and lightly kissed his pec. He shushed her softly encouraging her to remain asleep. He sniffed the dip of her neck. She did not smell of sickness. "Did she eat?" He raised his voice enough for Jaken to hear.

"No," Jaken's voice floated over the branches. "She was nauseas again."

"Perhaps we should find a Healer," Sesshomaru stroked her hair lovingly.

"Perhaps," Jaken agreed, already knowing the source of the sickness.

"My heart," he whispered in her ear, "what's wrong? You are unwell." He reached behind her and untied her obi. He let it fall to the ground, split her first layer and untied the smaller obi that held her inner layer shut. She should at least be comfortable while she slept.

* * *

Morning came slowly. He spent the evening considering where they would go for the day. Sesshomaru had heard of a snake demon colony that was plaguing the area miles from where they were camped. He felt the need to repay them for what they did to Rin during her battle to save Kohaku. If not that, he was ready to find a human village and have this illness investigated. Rin moaned lightly in her sleep before rubbing her eyes. "I think I'm going to be sick," she rolled over immediately throwing up the nothing that was in her stomach. Most of it was yellow bile followed by dry heaves. "I'm sorry," she muttered to Sesshomaru.

He rest his palm in between her shoulders, "what is it? Are you unwell?" He tried to avoid covering his nose. The scent was acidic and made him feel queasy.

"I'm fine," she forced herself onto her knees, regretting the action as it caused the world to spin. She held the side of her head and gagged again, falling on her free hand to the forest ground.

"You have been doing this for over a week," he massaged her shoulders as his lips caressed the somewhat bare skin.

"I'm fine," she pushed herself off the ground half losing her kimono as she did. She scrambled to cover herself. She gave an annoyed look back at the curious dog demon who lay in the bedding behind her. "Did you untie my obi in my sleep?"

"You did not put a yukata on," he rose off the ground.

She laughed wiping her mouth. He held her wrist in his hand and pulled her body to his. She hid her lips against his bare chest. "You may want me to rinse my mouth out first."

"I smell the acid," he kicked fresh mud and leaves over her sickness. He kissed her neck. "I go to find a snake demon today. Remain with Jaken and rest."

"I can go," she knew that wasn't true.

"No. You've been too ill. The rabbits were cooked last night. I thought perhaps a more tender meat would sit better on your stomach. Are you hungry?" He helped to close her inner layer. He reached around her sides and closed the teal kimono then wrapped her obi around her waist. There was something about tending her that drove him nearly as mad as making love to her. He tied the knot intricately behind her, satisfied that he had highlighted her pleasant curves with the tangerine colored obi.

"No," the idea of eating anything made her want to gag all over again.

Sesshomaru bent over, lifting up a wooden water jug to her. "Drink. I will not leave until you have eaten."

"Perhaps a lighter breakfast," she said guilty that she had made him hunt the night before and would not partake of it. "Do you smell pione growing anywhere? Nuts?"

He raised his head proudly sniffing the air. "To the east," he answered blandly.

She rinsed her mouth out, then quickly tugged the back of his neck down so their lips could finally meet. She took her time kissing his mouth. He embraced the kiss, sliding his hands around her waist. He pressed her back against the bark of a tree, lifting her legs around his waist, "I missed this last night," he slid his fingers under her kimono up her thighs. They flitted just near her opening making her legs tense around his torso. "You like that," he chuckled into the kiss. His lips ran nimbly down the side of her neck. He loved how she automatically tilted her neck back so he could nip at the skin just under her chin. He pressed his groin deeper into her open hips. She clung desperately to his shoulders, one hand tangling in the back of his hair, encouraging him. Until she went rigid. He could smell the putrid acid and water before it came flying out of her mouth landing against his shoulders and sliding down his stomach. "I'm," she choked as the next wave came. He let her down and bent her over the roots of the camaphor tree. "Sorry," she landed on her knees coughing.

"We should find a Healer," he knelt down despite being the target of her splatter and held her around the waist.

"I just need to eat something. The piones…take me there?" She said desperately.

Jaken's green head peeked in between a swath of nearby bushes. _Tell him_, the imp mouthed to Sesshomaru's turned back. Rin glared at him, eyes widening, lips pursing, adjuring him to remain silent.

It was only now that the sun was up he noticed the black circles around her eyes. He traced one with his thumb. "Jaken," Sesshomaru called.

"Yes Sesshomaru-sama," Jaken screeched from behind the bushes.

"Pack our things. We go east." He grabbed a cloth and wiped her vomit from his shoulder and stomach. He threw his inner layer and outer layer over his shoulders, slapping on his armor, tying on his swords in a rush. He handed her, her katana. He hefted Rin off the ground, grabbing the bottle of water before they left. He passed it to her lips adjuring her to drink. She feebly sucked in some of the warm liquid. The ride was short, lasting only a few minutes. He landed next to bushes that were covered in fat, ripe, black piones. Nearby was a fig tree and an area with nuts on the forest floor.

Rin kissed Sesshomaru's neck in gratitude. "Thank you," she smiled into his skin. "I'll be fine. Go hunt your snake demon."

He held her for several minutes conflicted as to whether or not he should leave her. Their lips met again, one of his favorite things to do with her. He nuzzled her nose as he pulled away. "Do not leave this area without Jaken."

"I'll stay. I promise," she returned his nuzzling with a simple peck on the lips.

He checked her waist to make sure she had her katana. He held her hand, his grip slipping until he gave the tips of her fingers a squeeze. He could already smell his prey off to the south. He turned into an orb of light leaving her behind. He flew into the trees. The first stop was finding the river to wash the stench of her vomit off of his skin. He sloshed water over his shoulder and chest, ensuring that it would not give away his presence. He resumed his search for his prey.

Snakes had their own disgusting smell. It was sour, and sharp all at the same time. He knew his prey would be worthy of the battle he would face, another reason he did not want Rin following him. Snakes were vicious, often poisonous and faster than most humans could handle. She had held her own in the cave because they were confined. In the open expanse of the forest, she would be at a disadvantage. He landed lightly in a copse of trees that reached high into the sky. Hissing sounded from behind him. He closed his eyes, removed Bakusaiga, then felt joy and happiness cascade into his senses. Elation and pining. A half smile touched his lips, she was calling him. He let his prey go. He would come back another day. He fled back to the shrub covered area where he had left her.

The smell of another round of vomit hit his nostrils. It sped his coming. "You were joyous in this calling," he found her facing the river. It was obvious that she was washing her mouth out from being sick. He seized her from behind, turning her around. He cupped her chin, tilting her head back, taking in her lips.

She tasted of nerves. Her hand held his fingers. She pressed them against her stomach just below the end of the orange obi that tied her teal kimono shut. "The strongest hanyou." Her voice shook as she spoke.

His stomach cramped as if wind was howling through it. His bottom lip shivered. They both knew she was not the first woman he had been with. Yet he had never managed to impregnate the many demonesses he had been intimate with. Perhaps it was the bonding that caused it, perhaps it was his love for her. _Love, _that word still felt so foreign on his lips. It felt like a budding flower in a crop of weeds in his mind. Yet it overpowered the bleakest recesses. "You're sure?" He managed to sputter out. He pressed the palm of his hand into her flesh. He had been told that if he had taken a demoness he would be able to sense his yoki inside the female. He sensed nothing from Rin. Perhaps it was because the child would be a hanyou.

"I'm late," her bottom lips dripped with fresh tears from her eyes. It was only then he noted the way her body was juddering in trepidation. "And I keep throwing up," she wrapped her arms around his neck. With the slightest tug she drew him down to her. He embraced her mouth, cupping her chin, running his fingers along her jaw bone. He opened her lips wider to allow his tongue entry. "Please," she broke the kiss, "say something? Are you happy?"

His crescent moon rest on her tanned brow. "My child grows within you?" He couldn't stop caressing the lower part of her belly. He couldn't sense it, "how do you know?" It wasn't hard for him to admit he knew next to nothing about humans. The extent of his knowledge came from caring for Rin.

"Remember my cycle? When I bleed once a month? I had it a week I think before the bear yokai attacked," she sniveled as her hands skimmed the skin of his neck. They ran from his jaw, up to his ears as the rate of her breathing increased with each touch of their lips. "I should have had another already. It hasn't come. I keep getting sick. I'm pregnant Sesshomaru."

He splayed his fingers over the material of her teal kimono. She was wearing too many layers. He yearned to touch the skin with his bare hand. His other hand traced the line of her quivering jaw, collecting the tears that bathed the skin of her cheek, "is this why you've been so sick? You carry my child?"

"Yes," it came out as a relieved exhale as small pools of water gathered at the corner of her eyes and dripped down her cheeks to mingle with his tongue as he opened his mouth against hers.

There was something primitive whipping in his senses. "This Sesshomaru is very happy," he knew she needed to hear that. She was trembling like a leaf in his hands. He would ask her later why she seemed so scared to tell him. In the years he had known her, fear was never associated with their interactions. He folded his arms around her waist, lifting her into the air. He soared silently over the quiet forest searching for privacy. He found it in a circle of tall pines. He set her down, removing his armor and swords. His haori was often used as a blanket. He removed it hurriedly. He pulled her quaking form to him, untying her obi from the back, "why do you shake?" He licked the side of her neck, his tongue tracing circles over her skin.

She answered by gripping the back of his head as he removed her layers. He made a pallet for them to lay on. He ached to feel her beneath him. "Lay down," he was on his knees first, towing her down with him.

That is how he found himself with his ear resting against her naked stomach. Every now and again he thought he could hear the faintest rush of heartbeats from within her. He had taken his time gearing her up only to become distracted when his tongue dipped into her navel. His claws ran up and down the curves of her sides. Each caress caused her to flinch in anticipation. She held the hair of his head in one hand while the other ran circles over his defined shoulders, that stopped every few seconds as if asking him to continue what he started. "Um…Sesshomaru?"

"Mmh?" He sniffed her navel. Her scent had not changed beyond the heat of summer morning that overtook the morning dew when she was aroused. He tasted the skin under her navel with his tongue, lapping at the sensitive bundle of muscles. She groaned in response putting light pressure on his head.

"Can…what…"

He loved when he made her words falter.

"What are you doing?"

He lifted his head. "Listening."

"For what?"

"A heartbeat," he set his ear back against her stomach. For a female, she was more toned than even the average demoness. Her muscles were similar to his. Deep wells ran from side to side coupled with the long ravine that dipped down the middle of her stomach. Her biceps were well formed. Her legs were powerful, filled with strength he had never thought this human capable of holding.

"Do you hear it?"

He shuddered. Her finger circled the tip of his pointed ear. "Somewhat," he was annoyed he couldn't hear more. He felt pressure against the top of his head again. "Is there something you want?" He asked her playfully. He looked down at her opening. Her clit that was already swollen with desire was surrounded by two pining lips and a moist layer of dew he had meant to open his mouth against.

"You're really going to make me ask?" Her breath came out in stutters.

He chuckled against her belly. "Life," he whispered against her stomach. He enjoyed the smell of new life. Perhaps he should finish what he started.

"Sesshomaru…please?" This time she tugged on a bunch of his hair to get his attention.

A low growl escaped his mouth. He would reprimand her at a later date for pulling his hair. To satisfy her need, he pressed the tips of his middle and index finger against the budding flesh. Her hips opened wider. His ear remained poised against the skin of her belly.

"Sesshomaru," she said annoyed, "as good as it feels….mmmh….you know what I like."

How he knew how to toy with her. "Tell me," there were more ways to tease than just with her body.

"I'm going to kill you," she shot back at him pushing on his shoulders futily to get him off her. "At least move so I can do it myself." She tried to reach for her own opening, only to get forced back down and her wrist pinned to her side.

He lifted his head enough to look in her desperate eyes. He webbed his fingers together beneath his chin, still relaxing on her stomach. "Is there something you want from this Sesshomaru?"

Her face was just as stubborn as his. She growled, herself exasperated that he was now completely blocking her opening. "Move…"

He shook his head.

"You're going to make me ask?"

He raised his eyebrows, saying nothing.

"Your mouth," she flushed bright red.

"My mouth? What would you like this mouth to do?"

"I hate you," she flopped back onto her back. "I'm going to feel sick before you finish, oh kami…" she gripped the material of the kimono and haori beneath her.

He finally conceded finding her center and tasting the condensation that had gathered around her opening. He teased her until he knew she was so close to finishing. He rolled her over encouraging her to get on her hands and knees. In the seclusion of the trees he had her howling his name, crying out in pleasure. He felt her clenching and milking him. It wasn't until they were both laying underneath his haori, covered in her sweat did his hand find its way back to her belly, "when?" He knew nothing of human pregnancies. He imagined beneath the skin his hand touched, his son grew. The other arm held Rin close to his skin. Close enough to breathe in her breath, to kiss deeply.

"Humans carry for around nine months," she yawned against him. "So another eight months about. I'm not sure which pairing conceived the child."

"Perhaps the first," something about that pairing had been so sweet it was almost painful. He had felt a fire boiling inside of him, a raging flood of yoki that he had not expected.

"Maybe," she kissed his lips.

"Just before Spring," he said gratified. "It's a good time to be born." There was something about her scent that had been plaguing him. "You are still anxious."

"I was afraid you would be upset," she sat up reaching for the bottle of water that sat near them.

"No," he said firmly. "Did you eat?"

"I tried. I threw it up," she shrugged her shoulders.

"You will try again," he sat up with her. Jaken would arrive soon. They would need to get moving. He still needed to go back and dispatch of his prey. "You will remain with Jaken while I hunt."

"I knew you were going to say that," she rest her head on her knees. "I'm going to get bored."

"You cannot battle as you are." He would not have her endanger her life and the life of his child. He enveloped her waist from behind, pressing his torso into her back.

"I know," she said resigned to her fate.

"Will you be sick often?" He almost didn't need to ask. The last week and a half had been enough.

"It's the worst in the beginning. In another month and a half or so I should probably feel better," she turned to curl into the warmth of his embrace.

"Rin," he pushed her back thinking back on the week and a half that she had been so obviously unwell. "How long have you known?"

She flushed with guilt, lowering her eyes to avoid his gaze. "Maybe a week…maybe a little longer than that."

"You didn't think to tell me?" His heart was twinging uncomfortably. He hated how she could do that to him. _Hurt, _he pondered the feeling. He felt hurt that she had not told him.

"I was afraid you would be upset…to father a hanyou," even with his sensitive hearing he almost missed what she said.

"We spoke of this. Perhaps it should repulse this Sesshomaru. This child was created in love and will be raised in love," he wedged his lips against hers. "I do not like this illness. We will find food that your stomach will tolerate."

"Female inu-yokai don't get sick when they are pregnant?" Rin chuckled.

"No." It was true, they suffered no ill effects in their pregnancies.

"Maybe you should leave me at Kaede-sa-"

He cut her off by pressing two fingers against her lips. That was the last thing he would do. If he had needed her near before, now he would not allow her to leave his side. He had seen and heard of too many deaths when a human carried a yokai's child. Especially when left in the hands of humans. He knew of Shiori and her mother, living in squalor in a hut at the edge of the ocean in the south. It was no secret that Shiori's grandmother killed her father. Then there was Jinenji's scarred body. Izumo was driven crazy from his desire to become a full-blooded demon. Inuyasha made a fool of himself with Kikyo until Kagome tamed the hanyou. Rin would be safest by his side, so would his child. "You will stay with this Sesshomaru." Then it dawned on him, he wasn't entirely sure what a human pregnancy required. "What do you need during this time?"

"Water, food and rest. Rest is the most important. A woman's body is strong but too much stress can bring labor on early or cause a miscarriage," she informed him. "Maybe some more furs so the ground is softer. Especially when my demon lover leaves to hunt at night taking his very comfortable mokomoko with him."

"I cannot remove it from my body."

"You could get me some pillows," she laughed into his neck.

"Miscarriage," the word tasted foul on his tongue. Inuyasha and Kagome had had one between Taisho and Izayoi. He knew Rin had delivered the lost female infant, but she never spoke of it. He never asked. The idea that it could happen to them bothered him. "We will travel slower," he affirmed, "rest more and do this more," he pulled Rin to straddle his lap. "You carry my child." He said elated.

"Yes," she answered brushing her lips against his. "_Your_ child." She emphasized to whom the life in her belly belonged.

"You are mine," he allowed himself to feel the effects of the smile that creased his features. He rolled her onto her back beneath him, "this Sesshomaru is in love with you." _Love…_he was in love and he knew it.

**Pleaser review! I love your reviews :) **

**If anyone is looking for an awesome Sesshomaru story, I ran across a story called I See You on wattpad written by animemadness101. It's probably the best Sess story I have ever read. If I am honest that one and Tales From the House of the Moon are my favorite canon based stories even if they aren't Sess/Rin. Also Iye Tea wrote an awesome fic called Mudita. It's by far a literary masterpiece. **

**Now to respond to my revieweres**

**Guest #1: **Yeah I know LOL...I knew people would be frustrated I used Natsuki but it was priceless! You ask, I wait for inspiration. I can't help what it turns into.

**Guest #2: **I finally watched 3/4 of Frozen while in the hospital with said family member who had surgery. Said young member protested halfway through, "this is stupid!" But it was great because I got to see what you meant. I imagine Natsuki a bit more youthful as she looks like 14 year old. I was a bit rushed writing that chapter in a few weeks or months who knows I probably will go back and adjust it so his shock is drawn out more.

**Guest #3: **Thank you for the prayers they were definitely needed. We had some post-op complications and it's been a slow and painful recovery :(...

**Guest #4: **Soooo...yeah...that happened. That was fun to write.

**Guest #5: **You are right. Their relationship will never be the same. If it wasn't apparent though after the end of Instinct, in the end it was deeper because of what happened and they valued each other more. But this is a truth of most relationships, when things go south because they do and always will, you end up with a better relationship if you can work through the issues. I have said it a million times but I have never believed based off canon these two would have a normal life. No one else did.


	13. To Raise a Hanyou

**Thank you to all my wonderful reviewers. I got this request on Instinct. People lets start a #Reviewolution and make sure all the new authors and new stories on FF get the appreciation they deserve. This is a time lapse chapter. It starts around the time Rin is 3 months pregnant with Yuki and continues until Yuki is 3 months old. And if you haven't read My Forever Heart by Kimmigirl9, I've been beta-ing for her and that story makes me swoon like a school girl.**

**Raising a Hanyou**

Rin crouched behind a tree. Squatting felt awkward. By her count she was only three months along and her stomach already looked like she was four or five months. She had a cantaloupe size bump. She wore a short kimono that stopped around her mid-thigh. It was plain in color. She had asked Sesshomaru to find her something that would accommodate her the rest of the pregnancy, but allowed her movement. It was plain deep brown to match the colors of the forest. She flipped her knife in her hand. Her feet were bare. The sun was setting, she knew he would be back soon, but she was hungry and she wanted something more than fish and vegetables. In fact fish sounded terrible and made her stomach rile. She covered her mouth, _not now…._off in the distance behind the orange and red autumn leaves she saw a doe tenderly bending its neck and lapping at the fresh water of a stream. The ground was moist and soft. It had rained for several days before. Sesshomaru did the unthinkable for those days, he stopped at an inn, in a human village. He merely needed to stare down the innkeeper to obtain a room to keep Rin dry and shut down the gossip about her relationship with a yokai.

Rin stalked forward, as quietly as she could. Her feet were louder than they had been in the past. The air smelled like winter would come soon. Her skin had a fine layer of dew on it from the moisture. _I'll need new clothes for winter, _she thought as she stalked her prey. She continued forward. Right when she was about to raise her knife she tripped clumsily on a log, the snap of several twigs alerted the deer to her presence. The doe bolted, only to be hacked down by a white hand with magenta stripes on the other side of the stream. He picked it up with a proud expression on his face, "you make too much noise." He scolded Rin.

For reasons Rin couldn't fathom she burst into tears in front of Sesshomaru, "you try hunting with this sticking out of your front!" She said and fled back towards the camp.

Sesshomaru was left holding the bloodied body of the deer with a perplexed look on his face. He could hear her crashing into every possible twig on the ground, and breathing so heavily, she might as well been screaming, not to mention the salty scent of her tears. He refused to run after her, although his heart felt compelled to. He decided to take longer strides and fly part of the way back to cut her off. He threw the doe at Jaken, "prepare this," he said and followed Rin to their private camp. He found her doubled over by the trees gagging. He covered his nose to avoid the putrid smell. He removed his armor, swords and haori, along with his inner layer. He knelt down next to her, setting his hand on the middle of her back, "you're mad at this Sesshomaru?"

"You stole my prey," she wiped her mouth, "and made me throw up."

"You throw up often, how is it my fault?" He rubbed her back.

"I was fine until you came along," she started crying again, "I don't need your help. I could have caught it myself."

"Humans can't run as fast as Sika, how were you planning on catching it?"

She started crying harder. "Don't touch me," she pushed him away.

He stood up and kicked dirt and leaves to cover her sickness. He tried hugging her from behind only to be pushed back again, "your emotions are erratic."

"That's because I'm pregnant!" She screamed at him, "and that's your fault too!"

"Enjoyably so," he chuckled.

"Why are you laughing?" Her tears doubled, "your so mean," she sobbed harder.

His mouth went dry, he had no idea what she needed. She was angry, he could smell that, sad, frustrated, and they were coming and going so quickly he had no idea what she needed. He didn't understand how she could be upset that he caught the deer she missed, or how it was his fault that she threw up. Was she suddenly unhappy to carry his child?

"And you aren't even trying to make it better!" She shrieked at him. She tried to bolt again.

Sesshomaru pulled her against his torso, he pressed his lips to her neck. Her skin felt cold to the touch, "I will hunt for you. Are all human females this irrational when they are with child?"

"You think I'm being irrational?" She tried kicking his shins, "why would you say that. I'm not being irrational, you're being mean!" Her face covered in tears again.

Sesshomaru nearly bit his lip, she was being irrational she just didn't see it. "Why are you unhappy to carry my child?"

"I didn't say I was unhappy," she struggled against his grip, "let me go, I need to change."

"Why are you crying?" He was about to go find something to kill, to compensate for her erratic mood.

"You stole my prey!" She repeated herself.

"You made so much noise it ran," he thought logic was the best option.

"Because you got me pregnant!" She shouted at him.

He shook his head confused, "if this Sesshomaru understands, you are angry with me for stealing your prey, that you couldn't catch, because I made you pregnant?" It didn't make sense.

"Yes," she finally stopped crying.

He wrinkled his nose, and forced down his laughter for fear she would start crying again, "and this is not irrational?"

"Maybe a little," she sighed, "my stomach isn't supposed to be this big so soon," she wrapped her arms around his waist, "and I'm dirty and cold."

"Jaken," Sesshomaru called the green imp.

Jaken came running, staff in hand as always, "yes Sesshomaru-sama."

"Fill the bucket with water and heat it for Rin," Sesshomaru demanded.

Jaken took the large bucket that was nearly as big as he was and went into the forest towards the stream. He returned several minutes later and blasted the water with Nintojo until a light steam rose from the water. "Leave us," Sesshomaru instructed him.

"I'll tell you when the meat is prepared," Jaken bowed and left.

"Do you want me to wash you? Or shall we put the sheets for privacy?" Sesshomaru's kept his voice soft, tender in attempt to keep Rin from getting upset again.

"You can wash me, is this part of that tending you once told me of?" She sat down next to the bucket.

"Yes, and something primal, your stomach grows with my child," he removed a towel from Rin's bag. "Take your kimono off."

She untied her obi and let it fall over her shoulders. He gazed at the muscles in her shoulders, the perfect curves of her waist, the way her hips had widened slightly to accommodate his child. She was beautiful. He sat behind her and wrapped the towel around her waist, his fingers brushed against the bump protruding from her middle, "of all the women I have been with, you are the first that has been strong enough to grow my seed." The words came out proudly. He dipped the wash cloth in the water and rubbed soap against it, "are you still upset?"

"No," she moved her hair over her shoulder as he scrubbed her body. "I seem to remember being told often that your arm was meant for a sword too," she tilted her head back and kissed Sesshomaru.

"Now they are meant to hold you," he grinned into the kiss.

"And that you didn't like physical contact, you've made love to me every day," she giggled. His fingers danced along her sides.

"This Sesshomaru prefers not to be touched by others, but you. Your touches light a fire in my heart," he sat in front of Rin. He opened the front of the towel, he set his hand on her stomach, "and something, about this. If you were inu-yokai the child would be born already."

"Really?" She asked, "does that mean hanyou pregnancies are shorter?"

"I never asked," he said.

"Not even when your father was with Izayoi? That tickles," she held the hand that was caressing her front.

"I was not interested. Our yoki makes our children develop faster. I sense yoki from your stomach, my yoki," he bent over and kissed the tip of her bump, "have you felt him move?"

"Him?" Rin lift Sesshomaru's face, "I am sure she will move when she is ready."

"You will give this Sesshomaru a son," he wrapped his arms around her.

"And if it's a girl?" Rin nuzzled his nose.

"Then we will have to do this more often," he pulled Rin on top of his lap, her hips straddling his.

"Again?" She kissed his mouth.

"Again," he removed the towel from her waist, "look at this body," he ran his fingers over her breasts and down her sides and over the small bump on her stomach, "I love you, Rin," he lifted her enough to remove his hikama.

**Two weeks later…**

Rin stirred from her sleep. She felt something that felt like popcorn poking her stomach only stronger. At first she ignored it, and tried to go back to sleep. She pulled her furs back over her shoulders in attempt to stay warm. She was still naked from making love to Sesshomaru before she fell asleep. Their fire was burning low. Her vision was blurry, it was still dark. She saw lightening flash across the sky. She smiled, rolled over and felt empty furs next to her. She felt the bumping and popping against her stomach again, she touched her bump, "is that you my little one?" She felt pressure against her hand. Rin opened her eyes all the way. Their private camp was empty, "Sesshomaru?" She called to the night air. "Sesshomaru! Come quickly!" If he was near he would hear her. She reached for her katana just as she felt the covers lift up and his body slide behind hers.

"What is it?" He was dressed except for his armor.

"Feel," she took his hand and placed it over his stomach.

He felt little limbs beating at the palm of his hand almost as if they were angry. They pushed and popped against his hand, "is that?"

"Yes, it's our baby," she pulled his mouth over to hers.

"A strong son," nuzzled her nose.

"Daughter," she corrected him. "Where were you?"

"Hunting," he kissed her bare shoulder, "when did it start?"

"I just woke up," she giggled, "you're going to be a father."

Sesshomaru smiled, he had never felt a happiness like this before. "And you a mother," he was taken by a wave of concern, "does it hurt? Human birth?"

"A lot," Rin sighed, "women scream and scream. Some are quiet. I'll probably scream. I can handle pain, but this pain, it's supposed to the worst. Do female inu-yokai experience pain?"

"Not as long as the father is near. If the father is not present, both the mother and the child will die. He comforts her and takes her pain," he rubbed Rin's shoulder. He had not considered the pain she would endure to give him a child, "it will be painful?"

"Yes," she held his hand, "but I will be okay. Too bad you can't take my pain."

"If it were possible, I would. What is the role of the human father?" Sesshomaru lifted her up enough to put his mokomoko under her head.

"They're never in the room. They leave the hut, usually to go drink sake with their friends until it's over," Rin laughed, "they don't really know what to do. I think it scares them seeing their wives in so much pain and not being able to do anything. Kagome-sama says in her time, the men take a more active role. They help with the birth."

"How?"

"Massaging their backs, hugging, cuddling, all things you are very talented at," she rolled over and hugged his chest, "will you be with me?"

"Yes," he pressed his mouth against hers.

"It's really bloody," she warned him.

"Is that an issue for human males? Give me your lips," he kissed her again, his hand ran down the back of her head and down her throat.

"The few times they are in the room, they almost always faint," Rin started laughing, "like this," she put her hand over her forehead and feigned falling unconscious.

"It will be no issue for this Sesshomaru," he nuzzled her nose, "although I do not look forward to seeing you endure a pain I cannot take away."

"Just be with me," she nuzzled into is chest and yawned, "I should sleep. Are you going to leave again?"

"You need something for breakfast," he stroked her hair, "I'll return before morning. Do you want rabbit? Deer?"

"Boar," Rin answered quietly.

"Their nesting grounds have moved, I will find one for you."

**Six Months Later**

**After Sesshomaru's Fear, the first time he returns to Rin after the promised three day interval. Yuki is around three months old.**

Rin held Yuki strapped to her front. She slept fitfully, every so often the infant woke up crying. There were several hours before sunset. She trudged through the melting snow, her feet getting wet from the cold. Yuki was covered in a fur, then wrapped in Rin's winter coat that was buttoned over her. She sniveled and coughed. Rin also didn't feel well. She had spent the morning out in the cold gathering firewood. Inuyasha had offered, but she was tired of depending on everyone else to do it for her. It was a mistake, her feet were cold and her nose was stuffed by the time she got back. Now she was trudging to Jinenji's to find some herbs for her and the baby. His hut was near Kaede-sama's.

"Oi, Rin, what are you doing out, it's cold!" Inuyasha called. He leapt down from a tree and landed next to Rin. "You shouldn't have her out in this, hanyous get cold just like human babies. Get on my back, I'll take you home."

Rin sneezed and started coughing, then Yuki sneezed and coughed.

"She doesn't sound good," Inuyasha put his hand on Rin's forehead and then on Yuki's "he's going to kill me," he knelt down, "come on I'll get you home."

"I need herbs from Jinenji-san," Rin said.

"I'll make something for you two. My mother made a brew for me from the livers of a bunch of different animals, it always worked within a day or two. Come on, the sun is going to set in a few hours and if he catches you out here and sick, he'll kill Jaken and me," Inuyasha took her hand.

She climbed onto his back, careful not to squish Yuki in the process. He sped back to her hut on the outskirts of the forest. He set her down on her porch, "next time ask for help."

"I'm tired of everyone catering to me," she said, "thank you, Inuyasha."

"Your wood pile is low, I'll bring some back for you," he dashed off.

Rin sighed and returned to her furs. She felt her forehead, "great," she groaned and lay down on her side.

Jaken came up from the floorboards carrying some jarred fruit, "your sick now aren't you? Silly girl! I told you not to go out in the cold."

"You weren't offering to get more firewood," she snapped back at him.

"It's cold," he argued.

"Which is why we need firewood!" Rin snapped at him, "now I'm sick. I hate being sick and so is Yuki."

"Sesshomaru-sama's daughter is sick?" Jaken came running over. He touched her forehead, "she's very hot."

"Inuyasha said he would make something," Rin sighed and laydown on the furs.

"Worthless hanyou, what does he know," Jaken grumbled.

"More than you, he probably knows more about raising a hanyou than you or Sesshomaru!" She picked up a bunch of dirty rags and threw them at Jaken. Yuki started coughing again, "Yuki," she kissed her forehead, "you poor thing."

As the sun set, Rin rose from the furs weakly towards the door of her hut. She put her coat on, Yuki cried in her arms from the fever. Neither one of them felt very good. She waited on the porch for Sesshomaru to come. _Look for me by sun set. _She rubbed her eyes, Yuki barely slept because of the cold which meant Rin barely slept. Rin started coughing again and shivering. As soon as the orb of light flashed in front of her home, she felt a sense of relief. He held a box in his hand as he walked towards the stairs. Rin practically threw a crying Yuki into his arms and ran inside.

Sesshomaru followed her cautiously. She smelled terrible, he knew that scent. She was sick. Yuki's body felt entirely too hot. "Stay here," he said to the black haired Inu-yokai that followed behind him, "you will respect our privacy, Hisato."

"Yes, Sesshomaru-sama," Hisato answered quietly. He folded his arms and sat down on the wooden rocker on the front porch of the hut.

Sesshomaru pushed aside the door flap and pinned it down. He noticed the low fire and the cool air inside the hut. He knelt down next to Rin, touched her forehead, "you're burning up."

Rin covered her mouth coughing, "I don't feel good. I'm sorry."

"Yuki is also sick," he rubbed the baby's cheek, "her skin is hot."

"She's been sick for two days, she got it first, Inuyasha is going to make us something," Rin pat the furs next to her. She closed her eyes.

"He knows what a hanyou needs?" Sesshomaru asked surprised.

"He said it's a cure his mother made when he was sick, something with a bunch of different livers, he has to go hunt for them," Rin said quietly.

"Perhaps I should learn this recipe," Sesshomaru stood up.

"Stay, please? She hasn't slept well in the last two days," Rin's body racked with coughs again, "I'm tired."

"I'll stay," he said softly. "Has she eaten?"

Rin nodded, then sneezed.

"How often does she eat?" _I missed her first three months, _he thought to himself, _I know so little of what she needs. _

"Every hour, most of the time, unless she sleeps, but she only seems to sleep when you are here," Rin smiled, "she loves her father."

"She barely knows me," the words came out sadly.

"She knows you, the night you came back, she barely cried. Before that she was miserable, she knows her father," Rin pat his hand, "I bet she can already smell you. I changed her before you came."

"Does she need changing often?"

"Are you offering?"

"Does Jaken know how?"

"Yes," Rin giggled which quickly turned into a deep throated cough, "don't make me laugh. I change her after I feed her, her skin is sensitive. Especially around her stripes on her belly, she doesn't like being wet."

"Is that like human babies?" He bounced his daughter up and down. "Her eyes are gold now," he smiled.

"Human babies are born with blue eyes, they change as they get older. How long are Inu-yokai babies small?"

"Two years they look like newborns and they are babies for years after that. By the time they pass their first century they look like seven or eight year-olds," he lifted the baby towards his mokomoko. "They do not suffer from illness. Were you out in the cold."

Rin's face flushed a deeper shade of red than she already was from the fever.

"Did Jaken not care for you? Inuyasha?" He snarled in frustration.

"I wanted to do it myself, my boots have holes in them, my feet got cold," she showed him the tips of her toes that were still a light shade of purple.

He scooted closer to her and slid the end of his mokomoko under the covers by her feet. He stroked Rin's cheek, "I was hoping to share my body with you in a more enjoyable way. You look exhausted," he ran his thumb around the curve of her racoon eyes. "Sleep, when you wake you will meet Hisato. He will guard you while I am away."

"Okay," she sighed, "I wonder how raising Yuki will be different than a human baby."

"She'll get fangs first, instead of real teeth," Inuyasha came in with a giant bag full of items that he hunted down, "who's that yokai outside the door lounging in the rocking chair?"

"Hisato," Sesshomaru glared at Inuyasha, "you will knock next time."

"I would have heard if you two were doing something else, she moans loud enough for the entire village to hear. Besides, it's not like I can't hear you being all lovey from outside," he dropped the bag down, "I need your biggest pot, a cup of this and the two of you will be better in no time."

Sesshomaru flung a hand full dokkasu at Inuyasha.

"Stop it," Rin held his wrist, "please? I'm too tired for you to start fighting."

Sesshomaru growled frustrated, "Inuyasha, you will tell me this broth you make."

"Or you could just ask," Inuyasha started pulling a load of carcasses out of his bag. He glanced at Sesshomaru who had a furious look on his face, "or maybe not…ok. Do you want to know more about raising a hanyou?"

"Not from you," Sesshomaru sifted through the items that Inuyasha brought making mental notes.

"Sesshomaru, please?" She was too tired for this, "please stop fighting. My head hurts, my ears feel like they are going to explode and I haven't slept in two days. For once pretend like you like your brother?"

"She's got you whipped, Sesshomaru-sama" Inuyasha pulled out a large pot from a chest by the wall, cracking up while he did.

Sesshomaru glanced over his shoulder at Rin who looked pathetic and was giving him a please don't start look and then at Inuyasha who gloating because he was winning the verbal combat. He ran his tongue over his top teeth in annoyance, she really did look pathetic, skinny and exhausted, "I will concede this time Inuyasha," Sesshomaru turned back to Rin.

Rin coughed again, this time it kept going until her face nearly turned blue, she held her ribs, "tell me Inuyasha. She's your niece, what will be different?"

"You need to rest my heart," Sesshomaru ran his crooked finger over her cheek.

"Your heart, you're so cheesy, " Inuyasha added the livers to the water. He went to the wood pile outside the house and stoked the fire in the hut. He sat down and stirred the brew, "she'll get fangs around four months and then lose them after a year, then grow new ones and lose those. You'll want to be careful nursing her after that, they're sharp, they'll break your skin. She'll age normally until she is around six, then it will slow down. She'll look young for about a century. If she's anything like her father," he rolled his eyes at Sesshomaru, "she'll have a temper. Don't expect the world to like her. Hanyous aren't accepted by yokai or humans, but she'll always have us. She'll be lucky if you succeed in making that village you want."

"Shut up," Sesshomaru barked at Inuyasha, "she's sleeping," he stood up and sat next to the fire pit. "What else is different?"

"She might walk early, or late, it depends on how strong her yoki is," he threw some herbs into the pot, "she can't keep herself warm, not like you can. Even I get cold in this weather. She'll be hearty though, little scrapes and bruises will heal quickly. Larger more dangerous injuries won't kill her, remember that one time you stabbed me through the chest?"

Sesshomaru snorted proudly.

"Yeah, you'll be glad she has your blood," Inuyasha watched Sesshomaru hold his little daughter, "how can you be happy she is a hanyou when you spent so much energy trying to kill me?"

"She is my daughter," Sesshomaru nuzzled her fevered little nose. "She does not smell well." He touched her brow with the back of her hand, "can these illnesses kill her?"

"Ka-san once said that someone she knew who had a baby with a yokai lost them to an illness. She's sick Sesshomaru, but she isn't that sick. You've seen Rin sick with fevers before, you're just worrying because this time she's yours," he nearly set his hand on his older brother's shoulder then stopped. "It pulls on your heart more, no matter who you are. Jinenji makes herbs a bit different for hanyous."

"She'll wean later, I don't know why," Inuyasha raised his eyebrows, "mother said human babies wean around two years, hanyous need the milk longer. Oyaji wasn't around to explain why. And my ass of an older brother didn't really care."

Sesshomaru snorted again and added an eyeroll.

"She'll start learning about her strength around the time she is two and a half. You'll have to teach her to be careful with those claws. I hurt my mother badly when I was two, she had scars down her stomach from a tantrum. That's when I learned to throw hijin tesou. It's starts out weak, then gets stronger as they age. She'll have more control, the older she gets. If your blood is as strong as Oyaji, Sesshomaru, you know that is something else you will have to look out for."

"I know," Sesshomaru tucked Yuki into his mokomoko, "her skin is so hot."

"She'll be fine, we run fevers higher too. Ka-san was sure it was from the yoki fighting back against the illness. It's almost ready. I gave this to Kagome once, she was healed within a day. Don't take it for granted that she has your blood. For the first couple years, her body will be similar to a human body. Once she's over four you don't have to worry so much about cuts and falls. At least she'll have you to train her, teach her about who she is. She won't have to grow up the way I did."

Sesshomaru nodded, he knew. He remembered how he had treated Inuyasha, he knew how Yuki would be treated by his own kind.

"She can eat real food once she gets her first fangs. She'll like raw meat, don't tell Kagome, I still would rather have something soaking in its own blood," Inuyasha laughed, "you know you hurt Rin by being gone for so long."

He didn't respond. He knew, he didn't need to be reminded.

"And the last thing, you probably already know, the first thing they develop is the heightened sense of smell. She will learn very quickly from that smell who she can trust and who she can't. Who is around and who isn't, she probably remembers your smell from the day she was born. Had you been gone any longer she would have forgotten who you were. Her hearing will pick up after she turns six. You'll be a good father, Ni-san."

He remained quiet. It wasn't that he needed to hear it, but it arrested the fear in his heart that somehow he failed Yuki by being gone for so long.

"Well this is done, once it cools off, give some to the baby, she'll love it. Tell Rin to plug her nose. Keep it brewing until she wakes up, I told her I would bring more firewood, her pile is low. She needs new boots."

Sesshomaru nodded, "thank you," he said quietly to Inuyasha.

"Sure, if you want to know anything else, just stop by, you know my kids love seeing you," Inuyasha waved as he left the hut.

Sesshomaru went back to Rin, he set Yuki down near his head and tickled her cheek. He pulled Rin to his torso, _you're burning up too. _He kissed her forehead, he had things he needed to do when morning came, but he knew that he would stay until they were well. He didn't have the heart to leave her like this.

**Please remember to review! Authors love knowing their works are appreciated, I wish there was a simple like button, but since there isn't, please drop a note. Send requests I love making one-shots for people.**

**Therec3iver: **_Ha! I know Jaken was great in the last chapter. If you liked him in that you will love him in Instinct. He has some great moments with Natsuki. I don't envy his job or the abuse he suffers._

**Overinathousand **_Thank you for spamming my stories and my beta-ee Kimmigirl9 and making it look like we have more awesome reviews so you can shit your pants about Rin/Sess stories. tell me do you shit yourself about Sess/Kag too? And by Kag I mean Kagome. I mean if you had read the summaries of my stories you would notice they are post manga/anime which means Kagura is dead so why post your garbage on other people's stories? I swear you and another troll are like let me search through and find every story that has a theme I don't like and spam them. Since I'm a beta I hear about from the people I edit for. Ok...I'm done_


	14. Yuki's First Words

**Wow! I am so flattered this story has over 10k hits :). We are backing up again LOL. This is a fan request from Consistent guest if I remember correctly. I wanted to write all their first words in one, one-shot but that is not what happened. This is just Yuki's first words. I actually like it because it shows the forming of the village where they protected mixed couples like their own and Sesshomaru shows a moment of weakness to Rin. It's fun! I will hopefully get to the other requests. I did write a list of them so I won't lose track I hope. **

**Yuki's First Words**

It was Fall again. Rin thought back to the two years she had spent bound to Sesshomaru. Their first year had been spent mostly as a nomadic couple, until Touma's attack. After she spent the months in Kaede-sama's village. Over the summer she spent several days a week at what would be their new home. She was intimately involved in choosing the chests of sheets and linens that would line their large bedroom. She aided in making the dimensions of their small cottage comfortable for them, insisting that Jaken have his own private room across the hall from Yuki's room. For now, it was imperative to have the small family area built first. As soon as it was, they would be able to move. She spent the majority of her time readying the room that would be their private bedroom. Sesshomaru demanded a large futon, larger than she had ever seen. She asked why he needed so much space. She was answered with a coy smile, that let her know just exactly what he planned to do in that bed. That alone was the size of the hut she lived in now. It had been Sesshomaru's idea to connect Yuki's room to their own. Rin chose the bright turquoise colored paint for the door. Rather than traditional Japanese style manors that had sliding wooden doors, and wooden floors, their home was being crafted from stone and marble. The walls and floors were shaded ivory and smooth. When the torches were lit at night the walls seemed like they were gold and contrasted the red wooden doors. Sesshomaru had settled on the house colors, meaning as he contracted servants for their home, they would wear a uniform. Rin stood her ground, demanding either human or hanyou servants.

Her trip to their home the week before had surprised her. Several huts popped up around the home that was being built. "What's going on?" She asked her Inu-yokai guard, another thing she was still getting used to.

"Your village is being built. These are mixed race families," Hisato trailed behind Rin. He loped wolf like along the grassy hills.

"I should introduce myself," she walked purposefully to the hut. Yuki protested against her back. "Ouch, dammit," Rin arched her back. "Hisato take her out."

"I'm not a maid," he ignored the command crabbily stalking past her.

Rin grabbed him by the wrist, "listen, you work for me."

"I work for Sesshomaru-sama," he pulled his wrist out of her grasp with a playful look on his face. "I may not be a pure-blood inu-yokai but surely you know you play at a dangerous game?" He raised a thick black eyebrow at Rin contrasting the bright gold hue of his eyes.

"Do I? If you hurt me, or piss me off, we both know to whom you will answer and whom can transform into a giant white dog and bite your insolent head off! Take her off my back now…unless you want to deal with my lover's wrath when he returns tomorrow," she faced away from the black haired sentinel and moved her long black hair to the side. "Now." She said firmly.

Hisato grumbled, then picked Yuki up from under the arms and handed her to Rin. "You are injured," he informed her as if she didn't already know.

"She cut into my back," Rin tried to reach the spot that was just below the apex of her shoulder blades. "You," she scolded her nine month old daughter who smiled broadly causing her cheek stripes to curl and her eyes to glint. "You are in so much trouble." She tapped the baby's nose fondly. Yuki grabbed her finger and attempted to bite it. She sported fangs, three upper incisors and two lower incisors making her mouth a hazardous area.

"Are you Lady Rin?" A woman with long blond hair came out from the hut. Her skin was pale, her eyes gaunt. She spoke with an odd accent. Inside the hut Rin almost giggled. There was a rabbit yokai. His legs were furry and bent exactly like a rabbi. "I'm Elaine," she curtsied. Even her clothes were foreign. "We have a little girl named Rei," she picked a hanyou rabbit demon baby up from the floor. The baby had the same bent legs as her father and orange hair on top of her head. "You must find me strange. I'm from England, it's a land a long way away from here. This isn't my first language. Hiro and I met under very unusual circumstances."

Rin smiled. "It's nice to meet you. How old is Rei?"

"She's nine months. We heard about your village several months ago. I believe Sesshomaru-sama had traveled to China and the word slowly spread. Hiro's family isn't very happy about our union and my family had no idea what to make about me being connected to a Japanese demon. He was kidnapped as a child and used for forced labor…well I guess you don't need to hear the whole story," she bounced Rei-chan on her side happily.

Rin couldn't stop grinning. It was what she had wanted, to give haven to families like her own.

"The other hut is Akari's. She's a hanyou fire cat from the East, her husband is a pure-blooded fire cat. They have a few children, some already grown and few younger ones. No babies. Atsuko just came with her husband. He's a horse demon. They have a few hanyou children. We're all just," the woman teared up wiping her eyes, "so grateful you made this safe haven for us."

"You're welcome. I know what it's like," Yuki wiggled in her hands, flipping around. "To be bound to a demon. Yuki do you want down?"

"Chi-chi, Chi-chi!" Yuki laughed happily in her arms as she squirmed and flipped.

Rin grit her teeth. "Chi-chi?" She asked Yuki.

"Sounds like she is trying to say Chichiue," Elaine set her own wiggling baby down. The two gravitated to each other.

Yuki crawled cautiously her nose wiggling in the air. She leaned back on her haunches raising one of her hands mischievously. "Oh no you don't!" Rin grabbed the baby's wrist and shook her head firmly, "you keep those to yourself. Damn my back stings."

"Chi-chi! Chi-chi!" The baby pointed to the skies.

"He's not here," Rin knelt down on the yellowing grass.

Elaine joined them straightening her apron. She wore a stained blue Victorian style dress, with multiple cotton layers.

"Chi-chi!" Yuki's index finger traced circles in the sky.

"He's coming," Hisato dropped to one knee, crossing a fisted hand over his heart and lowering his head.

"He isn't due back until tomorrow," Rin shielded her eyes from the sun waiting to see the streak of light flash across the sky.

"Chi-chi!" The baby shrieked as an orb of light formed in front of Rin.

"I am not due back to our home in Kaede's village until tomorrow evening," Sesshomaru corrected inspecting the land that was chosen for their haven village.

No words were exchanged. Rin was hauled off the crunchy yellow grass, turned around and the slices in the back of her kimono inspected. Sesshomaru snarled at Hisato, "why is she injured?"

"Your daughter," Hisato answered blandly, his head still bowed. It was odd meeting one with a similar deep voice as Sesshomaru, yet his face was that of a seventeen year old boy.

Rin felt a nose in her back, then a warm tongue slide against the cuts. "Sesshomaru," she was immediately hauled into a nearing tree. "Yuki is down there by herself." She protested.

"Hisato will guard her. I have not taught you proper etiquette as to your station," he closed his mouth tightly, obviously upset. "You may not refer to me by name in public. Here you will call me, My Lord, or Sesshomaru-sama," he kissed her lips as if apologizing.

Rin blinked back tears, "I already embarrassed you."

"No," he kept his voice low. "Hisato is charged with keeping your safety and maintaining our privacy. His proximity to us will most likely involve choosing to ignore the things he hears. In private we will be as we always have been," he could sense her ill ease. "Do not cry. This will not change our relationship."

She brushed the tears from her cheeks taking a deep breath. "How am I to know what to do? I came from a tattered hut, in a poor village," she cupped his cheek. "I'm not a Lady. I told you I didn't want to be one."

"They must see our strength. Power will protect us. Fear and intimidation. Jaken will instruct you now that we are closer to moving into our home," he wiped the sides of her cheeks. "Do not be upset. We will discuss the rules of etiquette when I return tomorrow evening. Come you must meet your maids. Akari and Atsuko will service you when our home is completed," he led her out of the tree back down to Yuki.

"Chi-chi!" The baby shrieked now sitting on top of the other infant who cried in protest.

"Yuki!" Rin scolded the baby. "I'm so sorry Elaine."

"Don't be sorry," Hiro hopped from the hut happily. "Rei needs to learn to toughen up. Rabbits are often seen as prey. It would be nice if she learned a bit of strength from a hanyou inu-yokai."

"Chi-chi!" Yuki squealed crawling full speed to Sesshomaru's legs. For his part, Sesshomaru stood there dumbfounded. He knelt down offering his finger for Yuki to bite. His skin was not supple like Rin's and did not break under the pressure of her gnawing.

"I think she said her first word…My Lord," Rin stepped on his toe where no one but Hisato saw. She would go along with this ridiculous title calling, but, she pushed her toe down harder earning a flash of red eyes, she would push back just enough to punish him for it.

He picked up on her chagrin and returned to his daughter. His face remained bland and bored. He merely lifted his daughter into his arms, off her prey and tickled her nose.

She slapped her hands against his cheeks with a funny toothy grin, "Chi-chi!"

"Yes, Chichiue," he kissed the button tip of her nose. "Rin, follow." He walked in the direction of the other two huts. "Akari was a servant in a castle of a great Dai-yokai as a young woman. She was also a warrior. She will serve you at night as she spends most days cat napping," the last two words dripped off his tongue uncomfortably. "Atsuko is a human female, in her mid-twenties. She is bound to Jinenji's father's brother. She will serve you during the day." As if on call the two women came running from their huts. They bowed to Rin and offered their thanks for finally having a haven to call their own.

"Chi-chi!" Yuki flung her arms around his face and hugged his nose into her belly, tousling his hair. He blew air on her navel making her laugh.

"If we have another child," Rin mumbled, "**she** better say my name first."

"If we have another child I am sure **he** will say this Sesshomaru's name first," he said just as devilishly hushed near her ear.

Rin paused, "Sesshomaru, who guards these people while you are away?"

"No one…" he observed the area. There was a large field at the Norther area of what would become the village. "What does My Lady suggest?"

Rin turned around, observing with Sesshomaru, "the earth near the lake will be fertile and easy to irrigate. I suggest we bring Jinenji in early spring to help plant a garden to feed the village and ourselves. The lake will make a source of drinking water. The river is five miles from here and can also be drawn on. But even once we move here together our might will not be enough. I can provide a modicum of protection."

"Lady Rin, Sesshomaru-sama," the red haired hanyou fire-cat knelt on one knee, "my husband and I are both battle hardened. Until a guard is in order, we would be happy to maintain the safety of this village."

Sesshomaru nodded, "I accept your offer. Serve with honor. Hisato!" Sesshomaru called Rin's guard.

Hisato rose from his kneeling position, straightening his black haori. He bowed in acknowledgment.

"You have a brother, Sato correct?" Sesshomaru inquired.

"My twin, yes, although we do not look alike."

"When I return to the village tomorrow, you will retrieve him."

"If he refuses?"

"If he knows what's good for him he won't," Rin said half laughing.

Sesshomaru smiled proudly, wrapping an arm around her waist, "very good," he gave her ear a lick. "What else?" This was after all her idea. Suddenly he had a wet mouth slobbering all over his nose and teeth digging into his skin.

"Chi-chi" The baby giggled licking the bit of skin between his nostrils as she did.

"I think it's clear, her first word is Chi-chi," Rin sighed mirthfully. "I think we need a barrier. This village is going to be vulnerable. Hisato when we return, we will speak to Kagome-sama and Miroku-sama about the possibility of erecting a barrier to protect the village and our home."

"That would block all from entering," Hisato argued.

"No," Sesshomaru's dipped his index finger into Yuki's mouth and pushed her mouth of his nose. A bead of saliva dripped from her gums connect to his face. He chuckled at her antics. "I have heard of barriers that allow in those that are loyal to the Lord of the Land. Those that swear loyalty to this Sesshomaru, will be able to come and go as they please. It only takes finding one with the spiritual power to create it and a physical vessel to maintain the barrier."

"I agree," Rin held him around his armored waist. "We'll need a Healer and a midwife."

"We have a midwife," Sesshomaru held Rin's hand.

"You know I only did that to make Kaede happy. I'm not sure I want to do it again unless necessary," Rin argued.

"I know birthing," Atsuko rose her hand timidly. "Well somewhat. Would you teach me what you know?"

"I also know birthing. And if I'm not mistaken birthing in demon world is different than the human world. We all deliver our babies together. There is not just one," Elaine said shyly avoiding Sesshomaru's gaze.

He strode to the strange woman. He felt compelled to inspect her straw colored hair. He had not seen hair like it before. He lifted a strand in his hand, taking in the odd color, "you have traveled far."

"England," she told him.

"Interesting," he backed away. "There are yokai there?"

"Something similar," she smiled at Hiro. He bounced next to his wife and bowed to Sesshomaru. "In our travels we have found many across the lands."

"Hiro. We will share a cup of Sake upon my next return. Your age?" Sesshomaru demanded.

"Eight hundred, give or take," the hare demon smirked nervously.

"We have much to learn from your travels," Sesshomaru handed Yuki back to Rin. "I believe I win this round."

"Chi-chi!" Yuki sqwaked happily.

"So not fair!" Rin protested holding her daughter. She tugged his hand behind a large conifer tree until they were hidden behind the trunk. "Am I allowed to kiss you in public?"

"Yes," he weaved his fingers into the hair by the nape of her neck, tilting it up. He dipped his lips into hers, tasting of her heated cavern. "I will be back tomorrow evening."

"I miss you," she whispered, her lips brushing against his.

"I do not relish these partings," he rubbed Yuki's cheek. "Chichiue loves you," he nuzzled the baby's nose. He exhaled, "I am hungry. I have not had time to hunt."

"Can I ask them if they have something for you?" Rin hid the shock of him admitting a weakness to her. Even she could hear his stomach rumbling.

He shook his head sadly, "it would make me appear weak."

"Will you be okay?" She ran her thumbs along the stripes on his face.

He nodded, obviously exhausted.

"Please…let me get something for you before you go. I might have some dried meat inside my bag. Do you want me to ask Hisato or Inuyasha to get wild boar for tomorrow?"

He smiled, "it would be appreciated. I will not have time to hunt until I return to you tomorrow. You don't need the meat for yourself? You know I do not enjoy dried meats."

"It's all I have but you can take it. I can find some berries and nuts for us. It's in our bedroom. You need sleep don't you?" She didn't see it often, but she was beginning to be able to see the lines on his face, the changes of color on his skin when he did.

Again she was answered with a nod. "It has been challenging. I have scouted the land of my choosing. I meet with Koga in several days. The trip is long. I will need more than three days. The North is willing to accede lands to this Sesshomaru. The south refuses. The West is ruled by my kind and the East is more tentative. Battles will rage as I claim our lands."

"Be careful," she kissed his mouth. "Come home to me."

"I will," he held her fingers to his mouth then backed away. He stopped, looking her up and down, then smiled softly. He set his right hand over his heart, his eyes intent on Rin. She knew what he was saying. She blew a kiss to him as he disappeared into an orb of light.

**Please Review!**

**Guest#1: **_I will keep he martial arts instructor idea. That reminds me of Kiss of Fate I am working on Kimmigirl9 with. If you haven't read it, it's AU and fun._

**Gust#2:** _Rumiko Takahashi clearly set up some women as being badasses. First off Sango was a total badass. Kikyo was a badass, Hitomiko was a total badass. True there was no battered women's shelters but polygamy was also normal so why did Rin freak out so badly? Don't worry I am preparing another one shot for that one. Rin was a badass in the Anime and the Manga, I don't know what they did to her in English but she flat out yelled at Sesshomaru in the Final Act, she blew Jaken off all the time and in the Manga she dumped water on Sesshomaru's head. She's never been this little prissy princess people make her._

**Guest#3** _The next chapter is semi-guest requested. I'm working on writing about why Rin forgave him and also the lingering effects of Touma's attempted rape. The next chapter will be a bit more emotionally heavy. One of the main reasons she offered forgiveness was because they were all manipulated. It's one thing when a man purposely is unfaithful, it's another when they are manipulated and the culture already has polygamy rules._

**_Estherale247:_** _You are most welcome! Now finish it! Just kidding but seriously finish it. So I'm rewriting Lost Memories and you see more of him as Sesshomaru the disciplinarian even in the two chapters I fixed up. I will consider writing one with he and Harutoga. If you remember he was already traveling often and missed the first three months of Yuki's life and the first two months of Taiyomaru's life. I will try to incorporate a oneshot of him as a new dad to a newborn. He's a half softie LOL. Thank you for the well wishes for my daughter. Thank goodness she is much better. It's still a process and I have barely slept in two weeks._

**Guest#4** _I am keeping everyone's reincarnation ideas. I am not reincarnating Sesshomaru. I have big plans for him and Natsuki. _


	15. To Conceive Demon

_**This is just one big smut filled lemon one-shot. I wrote this and considered it to be out of place, but since I made is so that Sesshomaru cannot create children without infusing his seed with yoki that overpowers his senses, this is how they conceived Harutoga. I had to play off Lost Memories because she knew what she was getting into when she goaded him, and it mentioned the two marks he made. I wanted to explore the idea that it didn't just happen overnight.**_

_**I'm actually curious as to how Mr. I'm 900 years old doesn't have any kids, he's either never been with a woman which I don't believe or there is more to it. Considering Toga only had 2 sons, I'm cool with creating a story line where he would have to use his yoki. In Lost Memories we find out the a demoness sends a comforting wave to the male that calms him. I want to write another smutty-lemon one shot when he finally figures out how to impregnate Rin without injuring her and how they heal from the miscarriage I made them have in Lost Memories. **_

**To Conceive a Demon**

Rin curled against Sesshomaru's chest. Her hand played along the lines of his cream colored chest. The water of the hot springs lapped against her shoulders. The steam from the hot springs matted her hair against the nape of her neck. Sesshomaru ran his hands through her wild hair. Her left shoulder was bothering her again. She rolled it trying to loosen the muscles. They had just finished an intense training lesson. Rin touched the open cut on his shoulder, a twinge of pride passed through her heart, "did you let me do that on purpose?" She touched the wound that was already rapidly healing itself.

"It's bothering you again isn't it?" Sesshomaru touched her tender left shoulder. "You should have let me heal it."

Rin shook her head, "I don't think I could have survived you cutting into it with your claws just so you could use your blood. Mmmh," she rest her head in the crook of his neck, "how much longer do we have?"

"A few hours, I go after nightfall," Sesshomaru tightened his hold around Rin's waist. He ran his thumb around her navel, he nipped at her left shoulder, "plenty of time."

"Yuki is going to come looking for us soon. She'll get bored with Akari," Rin reached behind Sesshomaru for the pieces of cloth to wash herself. She lathered the floral soap. She slushed it over her shoulders. "What?" She noticed his eyes on her.

Sesshomaru took the cloth from Rin. He ran the soap over her shoulders. He spent more time lathering the warm water against her left shoulder. The other hand braced her front while she bent over slightly in his lap.

"Put your head back," he whispered into her ear. Sesshomaru cupped water in his hand and poured it over Rin's forehead until her hair was completely saturated. He took the cube of soap and ran it into her hair. He massaged her forehead, kissing her lips as he did. "What do I taste?"

"Chocolate, Kagome-sama brought the last time-" she was cut off with his tongue invading her mouth licking the roof, and lapping around the teeth. Rin wrapped her arms around his neck. She turned until she was straddling him. He turned his attention to her neck. "Sesshomaru?" She rocked her hips against his. His tongue continued exploring her body, over her shoulders, up her neck, down her collar bone, "why haven't I gotten pregnant again?" The thought had been plaguing her. Yuki was almost three. Winter would be setting in soon. Sango's children were all two years apart, so were Kagome's. Somehow Rin hadn't missed a period even after Yuki was weaned the year before. "Yuki is almost three."

Sesshomaru's mouth stopped. He moved so he could look her in the eyes. He furrowed his eyebrows.

"What aren't you telling me?" Rin knew him well enough now to know when he was considering how to word something, or when he was holding back. Almost four years together, some of the best years of her life.

He pursed his lips, "I control when we have children." His eyes seemed to darken for a moment. He flashed back to their first time together, heaven. It had felt like heaven to him, a most holy pairing, when his yoki filled her body simultaneously bonding him to Rin for the rest of her life and conceiving their beautiful white haired daughter Yuki. He knew from the vision his father showed him, the experience for Rin was entirely the opposite. The flood of yoki that over powered his senses caused her pain. He slashed at shoulder, she still sported the puncture scars on her shoulder. He read the confusion on Rin's face, "I never told you?"

She shook her head. Rin lifted herself out of the water. A chill covered her skin. She grabbed a nearing towel and wrapped it over her shoulders. She gave Sesshomaru a nudge, so he would move forward. She piled his hair over his shoulder and set about washing his creamy skin, "no," she answered him softly.

Sesshomaru sighed inwardly. He had never built up the courage to ask her about what he done to her that day. She asked him to bind himself to her, but what happened after that request still gave him pause. He took Rin by the hand, "come back in the water with me." He didn't give her a chance to object, he practically pulled her in and situated her back in his lap. "Do you remember when I bound you to me?"

"Yes," Rin smiled, remembering that it had happened underneath their sakura tree. They had been soaking together much like they were now, in the very hot springs their home was built around.

"You told me it only hurt a little? That wasn't true was it?"

Rin felt her stomach cramp, how did he know? Rin figured it was just part of the binding process. It had never happened again. Sesshomaru was always gentle, vigorous, occasionally he would nip or bite her, or dig his claws enough to make her skin tingle, but he had never drawn blood again. "No," Rin's spoke almost inaudibly.

"I hurt you." It was not a question, rather a statement. "Not just here," he kissed the scars on her right shoulder. He let his hand fall between her thighs, "but here as well."

"How did you know?"

"Father," it was almost embarrassing that his father had drudged up that memory up and slapped him in the face with it just to make a point that Sesshomaru wasn't as all powerful and in control as he believed himself to be.

"What does this have to do with me not getting pregnant again?" Rin pulled his face down to hers so she could see his eyes. It was something they both learned early on, she enjoyed eye-contact and he avoided it. It was like a window to his soul.

Sesshomaru slowly kissed Rin, taking his time to take in the heat of her mouth and the sweet taste on her tongue, "first tell me why you didn't tell me?"

"I thought it was just part of your yokai-nature, part of the bonding process. You've never been so rough with me since. Sesshomaru what aren't you telling me?" She held onto his chest.

He pulled her close to him until her forehead rest against his throat, "it will happen again, if we try to have another child. I must allow my yoki to overtake me," he touched the puncture scars. They were supple and pink in color. They accused him with the pain he had inflicted. "Without my yoki, my seed is dead. Did you never wonder how I could go 900 years and have no other children?"

"Oh," Rin's voice dropped, "you'll have to hurt me again?"

He nodded.

"Is it like that for everyone? I mean…if you had taken a demoness, would the same thing happen?"

"I assume so, but a demoness wouldn't suffer the same effects. Straddle my lap again," he picked Rin up easily and maneuvered her back over him, "I want to enjoy these last few moments with you."

"Isn't there a way for you to control it?" Rin knew what he wanted, but she wasn't really in the mood now. Her mind was too busy racing to understand everything he was telling her. "I always wanted more than one child."

Sesshomaru was quiet. He wasn't sure how to tell her it was like holding back a hurricane. It whipped through his body with an intensity he had never felt before. The feeling of that kind of power coursing through him felt like fire and ice at the same time. The release was the sweetest pleasure he had ever felt. The release came at a cost, while his mind was eaten by the all-encompassing power, Rin's frail human body wasn't strong enough to sustain his demonic tendencies. The thought of wielding that kind of power came with an abundance of excitement. He wanted to feel her beneath him in that way, to cling to her body, to emit his yoki inside of her. To spread his warm seed inside of her womb. The need to procreate was coming back to him. The thought alone brought a growl to his lips.

"Would your mother know?"

That sentence tore him out of his sensual thoughts and made him shift uncomfortably, "I'm not speaking to my mother about intimacy."

"Not even if it would make this easier? I'm the one that's going to have to get clawed and bit until I bleed," her voice was raising, Rin couldn't fathom why he had never said anything earlier. "I can't believe you, I can't believe it. You've known about this for almost three years and you never said anything to me, ever!" Rin stood up and pulled herself out of the hot springs. She grabbed her towel and stormed towards the door to their bedroom. "Why did I have to fall in love with a yokai?" She whispered. Rin covered her eyes with her hands. She fled towards their room.

"Rin!" Sesshomaru called after her. Her words scalded him. The last words were under her breath but screamed in his ears. He caught her before she could get to the door. "Why did you just say that? Come back to the hot springs with me."

"No," she tried to get out of his grip. She held her hand out to the sword, she had only been able to call it once without the scabbard before, it rattled lightly until Sesshomaru shot it a glare that was worth a thousand deaths and it flopped to the ground.

"Let me go."

"No," he held her around the waist. "Why did you say that?"

"I'm cold," Rin tried to pry her arm free, "let me go. I can't believe you never told me."

"You never told me you wanted more than one child," Sesshomaru countered. "Inu-Yokai don't create children this quickly, Rin, talk to me."

"I don't want to talk to you," Rin quirked an eyebrow at him, "just let me go, please?"

"No," his voice was lower hurt and filled with regret.

Rin slumped over in his arms, "why is it when you are overwhelmed you get to run off and sleep in a tree for two months while I can't even leave the same space as you?"

Sesshomaru's stomach tightened, "I thought we were past that."

"I thought we were past keeping secrets like this from each other!" Rin tried elbowing him in the stomach. Unfortunately Sesshomaru knew her tricks. "Let me go."

He wrapped his arms tighter around her waist, "no, come to bed with me."

"That's not going to fix this," she had no choice but to follow with tears streaming down her face. She crawled from the bottom of the bed up to the pillows and curled under the covers. There was a knock on the door. Rin made to get up, but Sesshomaru tenderly shoved her back down.

"Put Yuki to bed Akari," Sesshomaru yelled through the door, he turned on Rin. "You are going to explain to me what you just said, you regret our bond?"

It was then Rin understood he had heard her. The hurt in his eyes was clear, tangible. "I'm sorry."

"You're not sorry," he went to an ivory colored wooden chest. He lifted the golden crusted lid and pulled out a thick emerald green blanket. He threw it over his shivering Rin, then crawled into the bed next to her. "You're afraid of me."

If the tears weren't coming before, they were falling now. Rin tried wiping her eyes, she tried breathing but it wouldn't stop them. She had never been honest how badly he hurt her before. The thought that she would have to endure that again for another child to be conceived terrified her. He was like a wild animal beyond her reach, feral and instinctive. Her wounds recovered quickly at the time because of his constant care to her. She didn't think they would be in this place again.

Sesshomaru pulled Rin back to her place on his chest and kissed the top of her head, "we don't have to."

"We do i…if I want…a…another b…baby!" She shouted at him.

"I'm sorry Rin, I should have said something before," Sesshomaru attempted vainly to brush the tears from her cheeks. "Rin?"

"What?" She sniffed back her tears.

"Let's make one now," Sesshomaru knew Rin had him wrapped around her fingers. He could deny her nothing that was within his reach, "I will hold myself back until the last moment," he ran his hand over her tear stained cheek.

Rin breathed in sputtering, "I can't even ask you to be gentle."

"I have to leave soon," he kissed her lips, "I don't want to leave things like this between us."

"I'm not in the mood now," Rin finally stopped trembling. She curled closer into his chest, "I wish you would have told me." She felt his tongue sweep over her neck in soothing motions. It made her shoulders tingle. He tenderly rubbed her left shoulder that always seemed to act up when the weather got colder. He nipped at her shoulders then looped his hand under over her side and ran his claws and down her bare stomach. He enjoyed how they rippled down her defined stomach. Her abdomen was nearly as solid as his own. "That's not helping."

"Are you sure? What about this?" He licked her earlobe. His fingers circled just above her hip bones. He pulled her leg up and ran his hand down her thigh stopping just beneath her heated center, "now?"

"Why do you think sex fixes everything?" Rin was completely rigid and unmoving in his arms. Her skin was tingling.

"Different swords for different battles," he chuckled into Rin's throat. He grabbed her by the side that was against the bed and pulled her on top of him until she straddled his lap, "I'm sorry," he caressed her cheek, "I should have told you."

"I'm sorry too…I shouldn't have said that, about falling in love with you, I don't regret loving you," she leaned over him and kissed him. "I really want a sibling for Yuki, Sesshomaru. I don't know what to do. It's like you aren't there and someone else takes over."

"I'll wait until the last minute, Rin," he pulled her back down and rolled on top of her, "do not let me hurt you. Do what you must to get my attention and make me hear you."

"I'll try, please, try not to hurt me?" She reached a hand up and stroked the curve of his ear up to its' point.

"I'll try," a slow smile spread across his face, he ran his hand over one of her breasts. Her body was still tense against his. He started by deeply kissing Rin, holding her close to his chest. She ran her hands down his chest and over his stomach. The motion made him gasp. There it was, in the back of his mind, the flood of yoki desperate to take over. The whole conversation ignited in him the need to procreate again, it was primal, it was irresistible, "I want a son this time." He dipped his lips into the curve of her neck.

"That is not in my control," Rin pushed Sesshomaru over. He allowed it. She straddled his lap and bent over pinning his shoulders into the bed, "that's your job as well."

Sesshomaru gave her a confused look, before rolling her back onto her back and underneath him, "don't fight me," something primal told him he wanted her beneath him. The flood was there, beating at his defenses. He ran his hands over her body from her breasts down the curves of her hips to her thighs. He could already feel his teeth his getting longer, his nails lengthening, he ran his mouth from her neck down her breast, through the line of her stomach and stopped just below her waist. He grasped her hips, "you're very tense." He parted her lips carefully and breathed in her scent. It was not nearly as arousing or intoxicating as it usually was, he forced another wall up to block the flood he felt in his mind, "are you ok?"

Rin looked down at him, "you're already changing, your teeth are shaper, your eyes are almost completely red," she tried to get herself in the mood, she brushed his silver hair away from his face, "can we just…finish already please?"

Sesshomaru nuzzled between her legs with his nose. He gently ran his finger only a sliver into her opening, "you aren't ready for me. Do you want some sake?"

She sat up on her elbows, "what?"

"To help you relax."

"You think I should drink?" Rin plopped backwards on the bed. She threw an arm over her forehead, "just go," she motioned him.

"I want you to enjoy it too, my heart," Sesshomaru laid down next to Rin. He pulled her mouth to his.

"I can't…not when I know what's coming…afterwards you can make me happy, please, just get it over with?"

"Roll over," Sesshomaru pushed Rin over before she could object.

Rin knew what he wanted. She went on all fours. She gathered some of the pillows to brace herself. She felt him push slowly into her from behind, she let out a small gasp, she really wasn't ready. She just couldn't get in the mood. "I'm going to make sure you enjoy at least some of it now, move the pillows."

"My shoulder hurts," she pushed herself up. The weight on her hands didn't feel very comfortable.

He pulled the pillows out from underneath her. Sesshomaru reached his hand around her stomach and carefully stroked her clitoris. He rocked into her slowly. She felt hot and somewhat dry. Her nerves were not making it nearly as hospitable as it usually was. He continued circling her clit, waiting for a sign that she was enjoying herself. The moisture was coming timidly inside, he exited for a moment to gather some to place against her bud.

When he pushed himself in again, she gasped, "mmmh."

He leaned over and kissed her neck, "that's what I want to hear," he pushed into her again. He kissed down her back. He used his free hand to run up her hips, over her buttocks. He felt his stomach warm, his blood was boiling. "I love you," he licked her ear, "I can't hold back much longer," it was teeming within him. Just talking about making another child brought out his inner demon.

"It's okay," she rocked backwards with him, she used her hand to move his to a place that felt more pleasurable for her. She widened her legs, "it feels good, go deeper."

He pushed in further, they moaned in unison, "Rin…" he couldn't finish his sentence, he gripped her wrist in his hand, "I…" he growled low, the second deep thrust was all he needed to lose his senses. The yoki washed over him like a wave, it flood into his senses. He felt it luminate his belly, he started moving faster. It was like he was in a fog. The hand that covered her wrist dug its' way up to her elbow, it felt warm and wet. He thought he heard someone calling his name, someone asking him to slow down, to stop moving so quickly. He felt a finger on his ear, the hurricane became a raging river. The finger kept stroking the tip, this time he heard her. Her scent wafted into his nose, it wreaked of fear, something he didn't like smelling on what was _his_. His mind relaxed enough for his primal side to possessively hold onto _his. _He could hear her voice now.

"Slow down, please?" She pushed back against him, his body moved with hers, "Sesshomaru, more here," she redirected one of his hands down between her legs, "please?"

She was begging him to please her. His primal side yearned to feel her clenching against him. He gave in to her wish for pleasure and rubbed her bud in quick circles, she moaned a long moan that turned into bliss filled smaller ones. She clenched and tightened on him, his mind slowly came to as he filled her with his warmth. He collapsed exhausted next to Rin, pulling her down with him. The release was as sweet and as powerful as he had wanted it to be. The red receded from his eyes to blood stained sheets.

Rin gripped her wrist. She stood up and ran to her chest with her Yukatas. She pulled out a green one that was nearly see through and pressed the fabric against her wrist. Sesshomaru shot up and grabbed her, he pulled her back to the bed, "let me heal it."

"No, you're leaving soon, I still have to care for Yuki in the morning, I can't have a fever for hours on end," her hand was shaking, holding the flimsy material against the cut.

"Let me see it," Sesshomaru pulled the cloth off, the cut was deep, it went nearly down to the bone. He licked the incision, not just at the top, but pried apart the laceration to lick the wound from the bone up. He held firm when she tried to her wrist away from him.

"You're hurting me."

"If you won't let me use my blood, let me do this," he continued cleaning the wound with his tongue. He could almost feel her bone against his tongue. He washed the open muscles with his saliva. When he was finished he put the cloth back over her wrist. "I'll go get some bandages," he touched Rin's face, "I'm sorry, are you hurt anywhere else?"

Rin blushed. It stung down there too.

"Let me bandage your wrist, then I'll fix that too. Hold it tight." He released her arm.

Within moments he was back. He gave her the bandages and helped her wrap her wrist. The bleeding stopped quickly once he had cleaned the wound. "Lay down," he instructed Rin. He ran his face down to her center, she wasn't bleeding but it did look red and irritated. He went to work slowly licking each lip until the red dissipated.

Rin gripped the sheets. The first few strokes were painful against her sore skin. Then the warm tingling began. First aid felt like fire on her. Her body was filling with warm honey again.

He parted her lips carefully and tenderly kissed around her opening. He leisurely poked his tongue inside her opening then up to her clitoris, back down again until the irritation was gone. Now she was finally filling with the moisture he wanted earlier and the scent that drove him mad. Her heat was rising. He repeated the motion up to her clitoris and down again. "Please don't stop," she feathered her fingers through his hair.

There were sniggers against her nether regions. He continued gently sucking and kissing her bud. He circled it with his tongue, up and down until he heard Rin moaning. He inserted two fingers into the core that was dripping with desire and within moments she was pulsing again. He sat up pleased with himself and leaned over Rin, "may I?"

Rin chuckled weakly, she looked down, he was already hard again. Rin nodded. He entered and groaned in her ear. She wrapped her arms around his waist and rocked her hips against his. She wrapped her legs around his waist. "That's better," she touched his face, "much better."

Within moments he exploded within her again. He pulled Rin close to his chest, eager to spend the few hours they had left together sharing their warmth.

Before he left, Sesshomaru removed the bandages and repeated licking the cut he had inflicted from the lowest point to the highest. Rin cringed, the movements were painful at first. His tongue felt like sand paper, but when he finished the pain felt like it was numbed. He stood to dress, Rin lay on the floor on their futon. He laid down next to her fully clothed, "I'll be back in three days." He kissed her forehead, "I may need to extend it to five."

"I'll miss you," Rin kissed his lips.

"Don't get up," Sesshomaru stroked her hair, "my heart," he pressed his forehead against hers.

"My love, three years of this and I still want to cry when you leave me."

He answered by tightening the embrace and pressing his lips to hers.

In the middle of the next night, Rin felt something tugging at her bandages. She tried to roll over in her sleep and ignore it, until she felt something wet lapping at her wrist. She groaned in pain, the action felt like something sharp beating against the already broken skin. Another hand landed on her shoulder, keeping her still. She came out of her sleep groggily to see Sesshomaru leaning over her arm, "Sesshomaru?"

"Go back to sleep, I'm almost done," he continued licking her open wound.

"You're hurting me," Rin tried to push against his head.

"It will feel better soon, go back to sleep." He held her wrist firmly in between his hands.

She forced her senses wide open, "why are you here?"

"I can't stay, I came long enough to clean your wrist."

"Can't Hisato do it?

"No," Sesshomaru stroked Rin's cheek, "it only works if you are pure-blooded. None of the sentinels are. I'll be back tomorrow night to clean it again." As quickly as he came he was gone out the door to the garden and disappeared into a ball of light.

He returned to his home every night that week to care for Rin's injury. By the third night he found a visitor sleeping in their bed. Rin was snuggled around Yuki. When he removed the bandages, he was much happier with what he saw. Her arm was less irritated now than it was before, the cut was almost completely closed. She stirred enough for him to tell her, "I'll be gone a few more days, I'm sorry."

She grabbed his pant-leg when he turned to go, "I love you."

He turned around and pulled her to him, "my heart, I love you."

Several weeks later Sesshomaru came home to find only Yuki waiting for him. It was turning into winter already. The first white flakes were falling onto the ground. The larger part of their house was still being built. They were expanding beyond their small cottage. Rin never considered the cottage small. There was a large washroom, three bedrooms, theirs was the biggest. A foyer that led to the garden, and the unconstructed area that would be become the public dining room, a large meeting room to discuss treaties and create allies and public guest rooms. The area was covered in a large slab of cement that was the floor. The winter and newly falling snow had all but stalled the building. Many of the workers were from the village. Most of them were hanyous or yokai, with a few humans. The extra strength meant that the home was being built much faster than it would have by human builders. Yokai could still work during the winter as long as the snow wasn't falling. As soon as it covered the ground, building would be stalled completely. Sesshomaru wanted the rest of the home finished in the next half year.

Yuki ran up to her father and jumped into his arms. She was wearing one of the kimonos he bought for her on the last trip. It was emerald green with golden diamonds, the sash was blue. Her hair was pulled into a tight bun on top of her hair accenting her little pointed ears. Behind Yuki was Hisato the guard that Sesshomaru had hired to protect Rin and Yuki, and watching her was Atsuko. Atsuko was wrapped in a warm wool blanket.

Sesshomaru took some warm wool lined leather boots from the inside his haori and put them on Yuki's bare feet. He put her back down on the ground and watched as she ran around the marble flooring as the snow dropped onto her head. He sighed inwardly, thinking about her birth. He missed it, but he felt every pain that Rin did. He glanced at Atsuko, "where is Rin?" He knew she was in the house but this was the first time that he had returned and she was not there to greet him.

"Ka-san is in her room crying," Yuki told her father. "She's cried so much yesterday and today."

"I don't know," Jaken said before Sesshomaru could ask. "She's been very upset the last few days."

Sesshomaru gave a questioning look to Atsuko. Atsuko shook her head in response and raised her hands. Sesshomaru walked to their home, down the corridor that had a new roof. He took a mental note that the builders were proceeding as planned. As he came closer to the door he could smell her blood faintly. He knew that smell though, she wasn't hurt. Sesshomaru felt a small twinge of disappointment. He rest his head against the door, he knocked lightly, then opened the door.

Rin turned to look at Sesshomaru. She tried to force a smile on her face, "hi." Her cheeks were red. She feebly attempted to wipe them. Her eyes were blood shot, "I'm sorry, I should have been outside to meet you."

Sesshomaru sat down next to Rin, "what's wrong?"

Rin wiped her nose with the napkin she was holding. She wiped her eyes, "I'm not pregnant."

"When did it start?"

"Two days ago, please go away…" She tried not to look at him.

"Why?" He took Rin by the chin and turned her face back to his. He took her lips in his.

"I'm mad at you and it's not your fault, it's mine, I'm human and I can't…we can't," she rubbed the twisting scar on her wrist. They hadn't tried more than the once. The injury on her wrist was enough to make them both cautious.

"We have to try again," Sesshomaru was filling in the blanks, "and you regret being with me."

"No." It was one thing for Rin to think those words, hearing them fall out of his mouth made her cry with renewed disquiet.

He stood up. His heart felt heavy, he was already tired from the fighting along the borders this isn't what he had hoped to come home to. She wasn't even being honest to herself, "Rin, don't lie to me."

"Please, just let me be alone with my anger. If I'm alone, at least I won't say anything."

"You've said enough," Sesshomaru walked towards the door to the garden, "I'll be in the hot springs."

"You must hate me," Rin rest her head in her knees.

"Don't presume to tell this Sesshomaru how to feel," he grabbed one of his longer kimonos and walked out the door slamming it behind him. He let the cool winter air fill his lungs and chill the upset he felt bubbling within him. He undressed and lowered himself into the water.

Rin sat with her knees to her chin, not sure what the right thing to do was. She did regret, the regret was there. There was no way for them to make a child without Sesshomaru going primal. It was never comfortable, it hurt, it was like trying to talk to a wall. She hoped it would work like it did with Yuki. With Yuki, it happened overnight, they didn't have to try more than once, it just happened. It also happened before she could think about the consequences. Before he could and all of a sudden there they were a couple expecting a child the same way many of her human friends had. Rin wiped her eyes. The regret was really that it couldn't happen easily for them, they couldn't just create a child the way two humans would.

They never made love when she was cycling. Sesshomaru may have been okay licking the wound with her blood on it, but he had no taste for human blood beyond that. He found it repulsive. They spent more time talking and holding each other until the flow ceased. Rin rubbed her eyes clean again. She walked out of their bedroom and into the garden. Sesshomaru glanced at her, then turned back to look at the sky. Rin picked up his soiled clothing and took it back to their room and then into the hallway for the maids to clean. She took a towel for herself and a fresh yukata. She went back to the hot springs and knelt down behind Sesshomaru. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and buried her eyes against his neck, "I'm sorry, my love, I'm so sorry."

He grasped her wrists. He held them tightly in his hands. He felt the same emotion she did. He could not give her what she wanted without pain. There was the slightest bit of regret in his heart, not that he had taken her, but that he had never asked his father about this side of life, even when his father tried to explain. "I love you," Sesshomaru turned around. "Do you still want another child?"

Rin nodded her head.

Sesshomaru took her hands in his, "if you want to leave this Sesshomaru, I won't stop you." If he let her go, she might still have the chance to have a normal human relationship.

"Do you want me to leave?" Her stomach hurt more than it already did, _does he want me to leave?_

He touched his chest where the raised scar still remained, in three years it never healed. "Only death or great heart-ache can break my bond to you, if you want to go, this will break, but then you could-"

"No!" Rin wrapped her arms around his neck, she silenced his speech with her lips, "no, I want you Sesshomaru and only you. I don't want to hurt you." She stroked the marks on his face, "I already hurt you. It's how I feel and the more I deny it the more I can't stop crying. Can't I feel both? Upset that we can't conceive children the way human couples do but in love with you? I didn't know everything about human-yokai relationships before we became a family," her kimono was absorbing water from the hot springs. Her front was soaked.

Sesshomaru snorted softly. "You're all wet now. You're going to get sick." He pressed his lips against hers, "I feel the same conflict. I am sure of my love for you." He stroked her cheek, "do you want to try again?"

"I think so."

"Will you permit me to be away for a week?" He wiped her tears for what felt like too many times this last month.

Rin felt a shadow of mourning wash over her, "a whole week? When are you leaving?"

"In the morning. I will stay for a week when I return, we will try again then."

"Will you speak to your mother?"

"No."

"Not even to spare me pain?"

"This is private, between you and I. What did you do before to get my attention?"

Rin rubbed the tips of his ears with both fingers and down the sides.

Sesshomaru rolled his shoulders, "it feels nice. Just that?" There were goosebumps on his arms.

"I talked to you," she offered. She brought her hands down onto his chest.

"It was your fear that brought me out of it, and I was aware that your needs weren't being met. Perhaps when we try again, we will try this," he held her hand to his ear.

"Sit down, I'll wash you," Rin instructed him. She sniffed and wiped her nose again.

"I can bathe myself," he grinned and sat down.

"And you know you like it better when I do it, lean forward," Rin pushed his hair over his shoulder.

"I do," Sesshomaru took Rin's hand and turned it over, "this healed well." He traced the line of the cut he had made on her.

"Because my yokai lover cared for it," she rest her chin on the top of his head, "why do you love me so much?" Even at twenty one Rin never understood why Sesshomaru had cared for her all the years she was a child. There were days she didn't understand why their relationship had changed when she became an adult. He was gone often, but when he returned his attention was on Rin and Yuki and his emotions very clear.

Sesshomaru chuckled, "because you complete me. You are the calm to the storm inside of me. The light to my darkness. The reason I am able to feel and for those I will always treasure you." The warm water splashed down his shoulders relaxing his muscles. Rin took a cup and poured it over his head soaking his hair. "One day, you will tell me why you love me."

"It won't be as poetic," Rin sighed.

"It will be as it should."

Rin thought for a moment, "because to me you have always been kind. You are my home, my safety, the one who taught me to be strong, to stand on my own two feet. You're strength is my strength."

Sesshomaru smiled, "so we will try again?"

"Yes."

"And the week?"

"As long as you spend the afternoon with Yuki and I. She wants to play hide and seek."

Sesshomaru gripped Rin's hand. "You will drink sake next time to relax." He understood her regret, but it was not strong enough to leave him. For a few minutes he feared that the bond he had created with her would be broken again. His fear was in vain.

The week was the longest week of Rin's life. She kept herself busy with Yuki. They drew pictures with crayons that Kagome had sent from her time. They went for walks in Yuki's new wool lined leather boots. The little girl strutted around like a peacock prancing in the freshly fallen snow. They walked to the river. They went into the village to make sure that the orchard was surviving the cold and that the vegetables patches were covered with thick blankets to protect the soil. They waited patiently for Sesshomaru's return. The snow continued falling. Jaken kept the fires in the home going. The building of the house completely stalled. Rin started teaching Yuki about writing, they spent their time playing in the snow. They made snow angels, and snowmen. Until the evening of his return finally came.

Rin held Yuki wrapped in a lavender wool long kimono outside their home. Over the kimono was a blanket. Rin wore the grey fur lined kimono Sesshomaru had given her all those years ago. Yuki was already nodding off on her shoulder. Rin adjusted Yuki on her hip. She checked the skies with her hand over her eyes, she turned to Hisato who stood behind her arms folded with an angry look on his face, "can you smell him?"

Hisato raised his nose to the air, causing his black mane to whip in the window, "not yet."

"I'm putting Yuki in bed, if he comes, tell him," Rin was still getting used to ordering others around. She went from being a tiny, dirty child in a village to now being the one that gave orders.

Hisato nodded.

Rin walked back into the house from the garden. It was rare these days that she met him in the unfinished area of their home. The snow was too deep and the air too cold. She took Yuki to her bed and laid her tiny body on top of her futon. She covered her up and turned to go back into her own room. As soon as she did, she came face to face with a striped face that grabbed her into his arms. He pulled her into a heated kiss barely giving her a chance to catch her breath. "A week is too long," he told her. He ran his hand from inside her kimono up her bare leg. He threw off his armor, he threw his swords to the side of the room. He shirked off his soiled haori and inner layer. He grabbed Rin again not giving her a chance to catch her breath.

Rin could barely keep up with his hands. They removed her wool coat, they untied her obi, they pushed her kimono over her shoulders and onto the floor. "Sesshomaru?" Rin tried to come up for air.

"Quiet," he took her down onto the futon. "I need to feel you," he nestled his way between her legs. He kissed her neck, her throat. He licked his way from one side of her collar bone to the other. He rubbed his full erection against her opening. He held her hands laced between his fingers over her head. He nipped at her breasts.

She felt heat and pleasure shooting up her stomach. She responded to his thrusting with her own hips meeting his. He stifled a moan on her lips. His hand massaged her breast, "I missed you," he growled. His hand nestled its way into her opening.

Her hips rose to meet his fingers, aching for him to be inside. He thumbed her slowly, while two finger entered, "you're ready for me this time." She was hot and wet just like he had imagined for the last week while he was away from her.

Rin nodded her head. She thought her hips were going to break from straining against his hand. Her voice filled the room with euphoric sounds.

"Roll over," he removed his hand.

"What?"

"I'm taking you now, I can't hold it back any longer," as soon as he saw her on her hands and knees he drove himself in. He looped his hand between her legs, he felt the yoki coming. He spent the entire week fantasizing about the release he would feel from channeling so much yoki into the woman he was bonded to, "help me stay with you." It was coming, ebbing at his awareness ready to overpower his senses.

It took Rin a few sharp thrusts to catch up to what Sesshomaru was saying. His hand between her legs was making her shake, her womanhood was so tense it begged for release. She shot a free hand up to his ear, she rubbed it lightly, "mmmh," her hips moved with his, back and forth.

"Rin," the growl became lower, carnal and primal. Another deep thrust, the red took over his eyes, a clawed hand ran single nail down her neck, to her shoulders. He ran his tongue back up the cut he just made.

Rin winced when the claw drove into her back, "Sesshomaru," oh but it felt so good, "Sesshomaru!" She called his name louder, half in ecstasy and half in desperation to get his attention. She pushed hard back against him. She was answered by a snarl, he wrapped one hand around her chest the other continued below. She pulled on the ear in her hand and rubbed the tip, "calm down." She bared his weight on her back. His body trembled as he moved against hers.

"I can't," his voice was shaking. He panted against her ear pushing and pulling. He tried to force his mind to focus, to come through the hurricane whipping through his mind. "Release," he whispered in Rin's ear. He needed to feel her pulsating against him, "release for me."

"Touch me here," Rin understood, as soon as he moved his finger, "uh!" Her hips took on a mind of their own pushing against his. She pulsated so powerfully she thought she would crash over the ledge he pushed her over. She turned to take in his face and kiss him as deeply as she could. She focused the kiss on bringing his mind back.

He finished inside of her, slamming one hand on the bedding to catch himself filling the room with a growl much louder than he intended. The red receded from his eyes slowly. His body was slick with sweat. He collapsed onto the futon breathing heavily. Rin sat down. Her hand touched her the back of her neck and came away covered in blood. She shook her head, "I hope we don't have to do this again. You cut my back."

She felt his tongue run along on her back and up her neck, "lay down on your stomach," he pulled her down onto the silver silk sheet. He continued cleaning the cut on her back, "I'll be home for a week. Will you let me heal you?"

"No, I don't want the fever," Rin touched his head when it reached the back of her neck, "that was amazing," she smiled running her hand through his hair.

He vibrated with suppressed laughter against her back. He pulled her to his chest, "I enjoyed it as well."

"You're covered in sweat." She ran her hand down his beaded chest, "it's usually me that breaks a sweat."

Sesshomaru held Rin tightly to him. Rin rolled onto her side. Sesshomaru spooned her from behind. He stroked the hair from her face, "Rin, I considered what you said, feeling both love and regret. I understand," he kissed her temple.

Rin held his hand in hers.

"No relationship is perfect," he gave a playful nip to her ear, "ours will be no different." He touched Rin's stomach. "You won't be able to go into the forest with me anymore to train if this works."

"I know."

"It means you will be stuck here more often with two hanyous."

"I know."

"If this works, this Sesshomaru will have outdone father again," he gloated.

Rin cackled, "because you would have fathered two hanyous?" Rin rolled over to face Sesshomaru, "you forget though, he fathered the most feared and powerful pure blooded Dai-yokai of the age…something your human can't give you." She traced his sweat soaked brow.

"In some things he may remain superior," he kissed Rin's lips and pulled her closer to him until their bodies were intertwined in a warm embrace, "sleep."

"Why do you think commanding me to sleep will make me sleep?"

"Because this Sesshomaru also needs sleep, it's been a long week. We will speak more in the morning after I have rested." He pulled her head down. She rolled back over so her back was against his stomach.

Five weeks later Rin again waited poised for Sesshomaru. They did not try to pair like that again. Rin told him she would rather try once per cycle than over and over. He agreed. It didn't mean each night wasn't spent in ecstasy.

When he landed that evening, Rin asked everyone to leave, including Akari who was holding Yuki. As soon as they were alone in the public entrance, Rin ran up to Sesshomaru and jumped into his arms, "we did it."

Sesshomaru's smile deepened. He touched her stomach. "I expect a boy this time."

"Kagome-sama said the medicine in her time has proven that the man's seed chooses the baby's sex. That's your problem. Mine is to sustain this life until it's ready to come out. Ah!" Sesshomaru grabbed Rin around the waist and flew into the air, "where are we going?"

"Remember when you told me about Yuki?"

"Oh," Rin blushed and held onto his neck, "I love you."

"Not as much as I you."

Five and a half months later Harutoga was born. (See the second to the last chapter of Sesshomaru's Fear)

**Heartsonsleeve22 **_I totally loved how aggravated Sesshomaru was when his mother said that she married someone younger. I might write a Yuki love story at some point, but what I really want to write later on is Sesshomaru's second love. I want to make him fall in love with a pure blooded demon._


	16. Good-bye Kaede

**Kaede Finds out About Rin and Sesshomaru**

_This takes place throughout Sesshomaru's Fear. At the end of Sesshomaru's Heart Rin finds out she is pregnant. In Sesshomaru's Fear she is attacked by an old foe of Sesshomaru's. He sends for Inuyasha to take Rin. Their group intercepts Sesshomaru and Rin during a fight with the antagonist. They only find out then that she is pregnant with Sesshomaru's child. I always wondered what Kaede would do when she finds out that her little Rin went to bed with the Dai Yokai that protected her. It's hinted at throughout Sesshomaru's Fear and wouldn't have been crucial to the plot to put in. Also during Feudal Japan times it was considered harlotry for a girl to have a baby outside of marriage…_

Miroku flew through the air holding tightly to Kirara's back. The air was cold, snow would be coming soon. Sango and Kagome sent him back to the village to retrieve supplies from Kaede for Rin's inevitable birth as well as warmer clothes for Rin. He thought for a few moments to get himself some warmer clothes as well. It was too cold for sandals and both his fingers and toes felt numb from the chilling wind. Winter was coming faster than expected.

"Find Kaede," Miroku patted Kirara's soft fur. He buried his hands deeper into her locks. Kirara gave a short meow in return, "forgive me Kirara, my hands are cold, and your fur is so warm."

Kirara gave him a gentle shake just before she landed in front of Kaede's hut. Miroku hopped off Kirara's back. "Kirara, can you go back to my hut and get my winter boots and wool coat?"

Kirara nodded and flew off.

He ran up the steps quickly shielding his ears from the cold with his already chilled fingers. He knocked on the side of the hut to announce his entrance, "Kaede-sama?"

"Hoshi-dono!" Kaede called, "come in, where is Rin? Is everything ok?"

Miroku stepped over her threshold and came inside. He went right to the fire to warm his hands. "Rin is with Inuyasha still hidden…umo I came for birthing supplies," Miroku blushed and paled at the same time.

Kaede was huddled over a pot of soup stirring it slowly. When Miroku mentioned birth she dropped the spoon, "surely Rin isn't?" She had seen Kagome and Sango before they left, that meant. "Who is the father?"

"Sesshomaru-sama," Miroku answered sheepishly. "It seems there was more to him taking her with him again six months ago than they both let on. That's why this Touma is after her. He intends to use Rin and their baby as a tool of revenge against Sesshomaru-sama."

Kaede's one good eye was practically bulging from her socket. Her eyebrow twitched, "I can't believe he would do something like that with the child he helped raise."

"She isn't a child anymore, even I noticed the pleasant changes in her body, round hips, beautiful brea…ow," Miroku was interrupted by Kaede's hand leaving a crimson mark on his cheek. "Either way," he rubbed the imprint painfully, "Kagome-sama has informed us because of who the father is, the baby will come much faster than human children, we would like to be prepared if you don't mind to make a package for us."

"I can't believe he would do that to her." Kaede muttered as she hobbled over to her supplies box in the back of the hut. There she had herbs from Jinenji, cloths and blankets. "I can't believe she would do that and not even seek marriage first!"

"I'm not sure that's how it works for yokai," Miroku dared to add, "you know Inuyasha and Kagome weren't when they first…"

Kaede glared at Miroku like she would purify him.

She came back with a bundle of cloths, a few blankets and several jars, "Kagome-sama will know what to do with these." She handed them to Miroku.

_Time lapse Rin returns to the village alone with a newly born Yuki by herself. This is after Sesshomaru leaves her without explaining why. _

Rin sat slumped against Inuyasha's back. Kagome was in front of her attempting to direct Aun towards the village. They had been flying for hours. Rin started with more energy than she thought, but after being upright for so long, her body was beginning to ache. There was too much pressure on her backside. She shifted uncomfortably in the saddle trying to change where she felt the most pressure. Her hand flitted up to the hem of her kimono and checked on the tiny squealing baby that slept fitfully against her breast. Yuki was sweating and moaning softly. Rin felt guilty leaning as heavily against Inuyasha as she was, but when Kagome looked back and gently rubbed her knee, she knew it was okay. Yuki was five days old now, Sesshomaru had been gone for five days and Rin still didn't know where. She tried to hold out hope that he would return, he would come back to them. Wouldn't he?

Aun landed in front of Kaede's hut. "Stay here Inuyasha, I want to see if Rin's hut is finished, and I don't think Rin can sit up on her own."

Rin just shook her head. Inuyasha felt warm but his chest wasn't nearly as inviting as Sesshomaru's. "Sorry Inuyasha," Rin whispered. Her arms and legs were on fire. Her body was simultaneously recovering from the birth of her child and the battle she fought while Yuki was being born. Her rip cage felt like it was going to break each time she moved, and her hands had callouses on them from how hard she had held onto her sword in the last few fights. Her hand went to her hip only to be reminded that Sesshomaru took the sword with him when he left. Rin tried to force back more tears, _Sesshomaru? Where are you?_

Kagome disappeared into the hut and returned with a wool blanket she threw over Rin's shoulders. Inuyasha adjusted it to make sure she was covered, "just rest okay?" Inuyasha told her. "He'll come back." Inuyasha patted her head like he did when Rin was a child.

Kaede hobbled out of the hut leaning heavily on her staff. She took in Rin's form. Rin's hair was matted against her head, there was soft cooing coming from within her kimono. Rin leaned heavily on Inuyasha and looked as if she would fall over from exhaustion if he didn't prop her up, "where is _the father?"_ There was venom in those words.

Kagome gave a sympathetic look to Rin. Rin bit her lip as the tears ran down her cheeks. She shook her head.

Inuyasha also did not speak.

Kaede tightened her grip on her staff, "Rin I thought I taught you better than this," she hobbled down the steps, "come on Aun, your hut is ready Rin, you can stay there or here with me."

"I'd rather be alone, Jaken!" The sight of the little toad filled Rin's chest to bursting. At least there was someone who had seen the last six months between her and Sesshomaru.

Jaken came running from the hut waving Nintojo, "where is Sesshomaru-sama?"

Rin bit her lip again.

Inuyasha adjusted his grip on Rin, "we need to get them inside, Aun, go to my forest," Inuyasha instructed the two headed dragon.

Kaede stepped forward and took Aun's reigns, "I'll lead him, Rin, we will talk about this."

Jaken jumped onto Aun's back. Yuki whined against Rin's chest. "Is that the baby?" Jaken turned around and asked Rin.

Rin smiled weakly, "yes," her voice was getting softer, "he named her Yuki."

"Yuki, this Jaken is proud, where is he?" Jaken's voice was as low as Rin's.

"I don't know," Rin answered.

The words weren't lost to Kaede. Kagome followed next to the big dragon, "how are Miroku and Sango?" Kagome inquired.

"Healing, I sent Shippo for the children, they should be back in a few days." Kaede informed Kagome.

They arrived at the forest. There Rin found a rather sizeable hut. "Is this for me?"

"It was for you and Sesshomaru-sama," Kaede fumed, "come on get down."

"I'll help you, take the baby out," Inuyasha instructed Rin.

Rin removed Yuki from the warmth of her chest and handed her to Jaken, "she looks like her father," she cried softly.

Jaken took the baby in his green hands, his mouth wide open, his eyes wide, "she does look like Sesshomaru-sama, look at these stripes and the crescent moon," he carried the baby proudly into the hut.

Inuyasha lifted Rin into his arms and carried her up the steps. "Oi Jaken, make yourself useful," he hefted Rin over to a bed of furs and set her down, "use that staff to make a fire. There's wood around the back of the hut, I want to go check on Miroku and Sango. Are you going to be okay here alone?"

"I have Yuki and Jaken," Rin looked at the entrance of the hut and swallowed hard, "and Kaede-sama."

"I'll come check on you later, I'll bring you some dinner," Kagome patted Rin's arm and left with Inuyasha.

"Thank you, for everything," Rin said as they exited her hut. Jaken busied himself bringing in wooden logs to light the fire in the center of the hut. Kaede kneeled down next to Rin. Rin latched Yuki onto her breast and tried her best not to look guilty, "it's not like that, Kaede-sama."

"Then what is it like child? You know women do not do this unless they are married, not even with Dai-Yokai like Sesshomaru-sama, what were you thinking?" Kaede touched the pointed cat-like ears at the top of Yuki's head, "Inuyasha's ears."

"Don't compare the offspring of the great Sesshomaru to that pathetic hanyou," Jaken yelled as he waved Nintojo over the logs. The fire slowly warmed the frozen hut.

"He loves me," Rin's voice didn't sound like her own, _does he still? _"He bound me to him, in the yokai way, it never felt like we needed a wedding."

Kaede looked confused for a moment. She touched Rin's cheek, "there is yoki inside of you."

"Of course there would be, Inu-yokai bind their soulmates to them," Jaken fussed as he came over, "oh she is beautiful, Rin, just like her father," he swooned. "Sesshomaru-sama's yoki will remain inside of Rin until the bond is broken or he dies and even then it takes many months for the remaining yoki to dissipate completely."

"The villagers are already talking, he disappears for two years without a word then comes back and this is what happens? It would be different if he came with you. Like this they are going to think that you acted inappropriately."

"He came back last year, what do you mean two years?" Jaken barked at Kaede.

Rin flushed red and glared at Jaken, no one except Inuyasha and Kohaku knew about that. Well Kohau told Sango and Inuyasha told Kagome, but Rin had never told Kaede what Sesshomaru did a year before under the light of the full moon.

"He came last year?" Kaede put her hands on her hips, "we need to wash you, your filthy," she touched Rin's hair. "What happened last year, you never said any…you didn't."

"We didn't," Rin felt like a child again, "he just…well…"

"Were his eyes red then?" Jaken asked.

"How did you know?" Rin's mouth dropped.

"He'd been agitated since that trip, more short tempered than usual, like something was missing," Jaken gave a shy smile, "you think I didn't notice that things were more difficult, that you were blushing more, that his gifts were getting more lavish? I thought I was going to have to spell it out to him. Rin he loves you, if he left I'm sure he'll return. I have been in his service for a hundred years, he has never even considered loving a single woman the way he loves you. He has treated none with the kindness he has you, you are his soulmate, he will not abandon you."

"What happened? Rin, the villagers are talking, and it's not for the good," Kaede raised her voice causing the baby to whimper.

"Let them talk, I'm tired," Rin hinted to Kaede, "can you lecture me after I've rested?"

"I'll bring you some food for you from my hut, Kagome will make everyone dinner, until then Jaken can I trust you to care for her? When did you have the baby?"

"Five days ago," she traced the lines on Yuki's cheek, "she's five days old today." More tears came from her eyes leaving paths of white skin through her dirt stained cheeks.

"Jaken she needs to rest laying down for at least a week. Child why are you so sad?" Kaede touched Rin's cheek, "did he leave you?"

"He wouldn't," Jaken intoned.

"Kaede-sama," Rin hugged the old woman tightly.

"He couldn't, the bond wouldn't let him," Jaken argued.

"He did," Rin sobbed against Kaede.

_Time Lapse, 3 months when Sesshomaru finally returns_

Shippo came bounding into Kaede's hut. He was too big to jump onto people's shoulders anymore so he leapt over Inuyasha and Kagome's three children's heads and landed next to Sango who sat with her own four children. Sango's stomach had a small pooch where her fifth child grew. "Did the fighting end so quickly?" Sango asked, "I heard there were close to five hundred Yokai hiding in our forest."

"He came back!" Shippo squealed, "Sesshomaru-sama, he blasted them all with one swipe of Bakusaiga!" Shippo imitated Sesshomaru's blow and then made sparks of green fly from his hand and crackle and sizzle in the air. All the kids laughed and whooped at his trick.

"He's back?" Kaede cocked an eyebrow at Shippo, "I better go," she fully intended on giving the yokai a piece of her mind and then some for what he put Rin through the last three months.

"I wouldn't go, not now anyway, he took Rin and Yuki into the air so we wouldn't see her trying to pummel him, then flew off with her, we don't know where they are now," Shippo jumped into Sango's lap next to one of her daughters.

"Perhaps, I'll check in later then," Kaede continued taking out balls of rice for the children and for Shippo, "the nerve, coming back here after what he did to her."

"He is the father," Sango argued, "we may not like it, but he is Yuki's father, he was bound to come back and check on her eventually."

"That look in his eye didn't seem very fatherly," Shippo stuffed his mouth full of rice, "I'm not old enough to find a soulmate yet, but I know fire when I see it, and his eyes were fiery for her."

Kaede ground her teeth.

Later in the evening she was informed by Kagome that Sesshomaru-sama had returned.

"Rin invited him to spend the night, don't be angry Kaede-sama, they have a lot to work out now." Kagome told Kaede.

"Work out! They aren't even married! I thought I explained to her this is wasn't what good Japanese girls do!" Kaede picked up her staff.

"It is what Yokai do," Inuyasha leaned against the wall of the hut with one foot upraised, "especially pure-blooded Dai-yokai. Leave them be for the night, they need to talk alone."

"Talk, you think that's all they are doing is talking?" Kaede fumed, "I don't care how old he is or how powerful I'll purify him myself, playing on Rin's emotions."

Kagome took Kaede by the arm, "you couldn't, I probably could if I wanted to be laid up for a week, but that isn't what they need. However you view Rin, she belongs to him now, and we shouldn't intervene."

"And if they are doing more than talking, that's their business, not like they didn't spend the full six months before Yuki was born doing _that_," Inuyasha rolled his eyes.

Kagome flushed.

Kaede's eye darkened. "Fine, I'll wait until morning, and then I will speak to him directly," Kaede plopped back down by the fire, "he better have a good explanation for leaving her the way he did and ruining her reputation."

Kaede made her way through the snow. She trudged lightly from her hut into the forest. Steam rose from the chimney of Rin's hut and as she made her way she heard the unmistakable sounds of passion.

Kaede walked faster intending on giving Sesshomaru a piece of her mind, for taking advantage of a young girl, when she heard Rin yelp, "Sesshomaru."

He laughed, Kaede had never even seen him smile, "that was twice," his voice was deep and throaty from outside the hut. _What are they doing?_

"You bit my shoulder!" That was Rin's voice.

The laughter of a man and the moaning of Rin's voice continued. "Will you yield now?" That was Sesshomaru's voice.

Rin's voice was rasping, "no…more."

The sounds from the hut continued, Kaede stomped her feet up the stairs only to be met by the little Yokai, Jaken. "Out of the way little Yokai, how dare he come back here and begin doing that to her again. I'll purify him if he won't come out and talk to me."

"Kaede!" Jaken yelped, "you must not disturb them," Jaken refused to move and waved Nintojo threateningly.

A howl came from inside the hut and a green whip lashed out at Jaken nearly taking his head off and snapping dangerously close to Kaede's only good eye. Jaken ran from the hut while Kaede backed back down the stairs slowly. The room screen came next flying through the door causing Kaede and Jaken to both hit the snow laden ground before it smashed into them. "Maybe I will wait until they are finished." Kaede grumbled.

Kaede sat on the steps with a heavy shall over her shoulders. Her knees were folded up to her chest, "how long do they plan to keep doing this?" She glanced at Jaken who sat next to her twirling Nintojo in circles. They had stopped only long enough for Rin to make demands from Sesshomaru if she were to live with him. _So that's why he came back_, Kaede thought to herself, he's come to collect her and the baby. Kaede felt pride that Rin didn't go with him willingly and that she set what seemed to be reasonable standards on the Dai-yokai that was until she heard more sounds of passion coming from the hut. If it wasn't for the death threat uttered Kaede would have burst into the hut already.

"Don't ask me, for fear of my life I have never interfered," Jaken replied. "He will kill you if you step foot in before he has invited you in."

Kaede let out a snort, and finally they heard from inside, "we better let them in," that was Rin's voice. "Are you dressed?"

"Yes," that was Sesshomaru. "Jaken," he barked.

Jaken motioned for Kaede to follow him as he entered.

"Were you listening?" Sesshomaru accused Jaken and Kaede.

Jaken threw himself on the ground and bowed, "I didn't hear anything."

"I heard everything, how dare you!" Kaede yelled at Sesshomaru, "getting her pregnant than leaving her to raise your child alone for three months without a single word! And now you intend to take her with you after sullying he reputation and making her look like a common whore!"

Rin winced at those words. She held Yuki in her arms.

"Her reputation is intact," Sesshomaru coolly responded.

"Is that what you think? Do you not understand human customs? You took her without being properly married!" Kaede came closer.

"Silence," Sesshomaru commanded.

"Kaede-sama," Rin wrung her fingers until Sesshomaru placed a calming hand on her over hers, "thank you," Rin turned her eyes to Sesshomaru. That's when she saw it in his eyes and hers, a deep connection, an awareness of each other. "Kaede-sama, in the yokai world we were married the night Yuki was conceived I know in the human world it doesn't seem that way, but Sesshomaru is my hu…" she glanced at him again. He nodded, "my husband, and has been. When his…"

"Ours," he corrected Rin gently.

"When our home is finished, he will come back and collect Yuki and I, we're grateful for all the care you provided me since I was eight," Rin stumbled over her words when Sesshomaru pulled her into his lap possessively, "my heart is with him."

"Have you any idea Sesshomaru-sama what you did to her the last three months, the pain you caused and now you wish take her? What stops you from doing it again? Let go of my sleeve little Yokai," Kaede rebuked Jaken who was pulling on her sleeve to get her to be quiet.

Sesshomaru turned cold eyes onto Kaede. Kaede watched as this time Rin caressed his wrist, "that is between us, I expect Rin to be treated as royalty when I am away."

"You're leaving her again? This is how you would treat your wife?" Kaede's hands were on her hips.

Sesshomaru let out a low warning growl from his throat, "I will return in three days."

"Kaede-sama, Sesshomaru is establishing a territory of his own, this village will be under his protection from now on, the village will benefit because of my relationship with him and because of the kindness that is showed to me. Unfortunately I can't be much help in my current state as a mother," Rin lowered her eyes.

Shamelessly Sesshomaru leaned over and kissed the skin above Rin's shoulder, he whispered something Kaede couldn't make out in Rin's ear and then continued to glare at Kaede. "Is this what you want child?" Kaede inquired.

"Yes," Rin answered quickly. She grasped his hand, "he's Yuki's father, and I love him."

Kaede threw her hands up in the air, "I give up then, would you at least marry her in the human tradition to clear up any misunderstandings about her honor?"

"Those misunderstandings will be cleared by the end of the day," Sesshomaru answered low and cold. "If that is all, leave." He demanded.

Kaede sighed, shook her head and then slowly left, "if you need me child you know where to find me."

_Six months later-_

Sesshomaru returned in the evening as he did every three days. Rin greeted him wearing a light kimono. It was near the end of summer. Kaede sat on the porch holding baby Yuki in her arms. Sesshomaru gathered Rin into is arms and pulled her close. He brushed his lips against hers. Kaede watched the woman she once called a child return the kiss with as much passion as was pressed upon her. Together they walked up to the hut holding hands, "it's finished," Sesshomaru said as they passed Kaede. Kaede could clearly hear a difference in the tone of his voice when he addressed Rin opposed to others.

"Could you take care of Yuki for a little while?" Rin blushed as she asked Kaede.

Kaede knew that look, "I'll be back when she gets hungry."

"Oh wait a minute, look Sesshomaru," Rin bent down and opened the baby's mouth, "she grew fangs while you were away," Rin tickled the baby's gums making Yuki laugh.

Sesshomaru bent over, he stroked his daughter's cheeks and looked back at Rin with a smile that Kaede only ever saw when he looked at his daughter or his wife. He stood up, and walked with Rin into the hut. Kaede stood up and decided to take the baby out to the garden with her. It was fall and there was plenty of harvesting to do. "I'll be here a few days longer," she heard Sesshomaru speak to Rin, "to move you to our home."

Rin left two days later taking Yuki with her. They loaded Aun with Rin's clothing and Yuki's blankets. Rin gave Kaede their old bedding telling her that the futon at their new home was much bigger than the furs and blankets they had in their home.

"Kaede," Sesshomaru called her before he took Rin, "thank you."

_Two and a half years later-_

Rin arrived on Aun, with a long legged gangly silver haired toddler in front of her. Sesshomaru landed next to them. He stayed long enough to linger a kiss on Rin's lips before disappearing into a ball of light. As soon as he left another inu-yokai landed behind them. This one with a gruffer appearance, long raven hair and black lined golden eyes. His cheeks were triple striped. He held two katanas fast to his back with a jet black mokomoko that looped over both his shoulders.

Rin held onto the little girl's hand as they walked together towards Kaede's hut. Rin's stomach was unmistakable, she held the glow of a woman expecting. Kaede welcomed Rin with open arms. "This is Kaede-sama," Rin introduced Yuki and the Inu-yokai again to the old woman.

Kaede touched Rin's round stomach, "another?"

"In a few weeks," Rin hugged Kaede, "before the end of summer, will you come when I call for you? Will you help deliver this baby?"

"Of course child," Kaede thought about that for a moment, Rin was soon to be the mother of two children, there was no point in continuing to call her a child.

"I will be there too," a cool voice came from behind them.

Hisato was immediately on his hands and knees, "Gobodo-sama!"

Rin bowed lightly, "Gobodo-sama!" Standing there was Sesshomaru's mother, "Kaede-sama this is Gobodo-sama, Sesshomaru's mother. Of course you're welcome."

"Is this my grand-daughter?" Gobodo-sama asked looking at the little girl who held tight to Rin's hand. Yuki's silver hair was tied high up on her head. "Of course my son would refuse to tell me when she was born and that barrier was made to block even me." She knelt down, "you may call me Soba-sama, look at this, stripes and a moon just like her father."

Yuki tried to bite Gobodo-sama's hand the second she touched the stripe on Yuki's cheek.

"Attitude like her father's too," Gobodo-sama laughed proudly.

"Be careful," Rin held up the innocent clawed hands, "Yuki show Soba-sama what you can do," Rin took a step back.

The little girl pointed her hand at her grandmother with a mischievous smile on her face. Green poison flew from her claws.

"Oh that makes me so happy to see!" Gobodo-sama giggled and clapped her hands.

Kaede watched the strange female yokai who's aura was almost more powerful than Sesshomaru's, "please, everyone come in," Kaede spoke.

Rin followed Kaede who was followed by Sesshomaru's mother and Hisato.

_Four years later…_

_(Before Lost Memories)_

Rin slept peacefully in her bed. It was winter, the ground was cold. Her room was dimly lit by the ebbing orange embers of the fireplace. She huddled against Harutoga and Yuki who were snuggled in her bed. She thought she heard Sesshomaru's voice in her sleep and a hand on her face. She knew better than to believe it, he said he would be gone for two weeks. It was necessary these days. The borders were established but now they needed reinforcing which Sesshomaru complained was almost harder than establishing them. Entire tribes of yokai had to be rearranged to make it work so the stronger ones were at the borders. Allies had to be made, visitors needed to be wined and dined. Rin tried to make the best of it.

The voice came into her ears again, "my heart, Rin," the finger stroked her cheek, "wake up." The fingers pushed a little harder turning the soft caress into a firm nudge.

Rin drearily opened her eyes to stare into golden eyes, "Sesshomaru?" She rubbed her eyes, "you're home?"

Sesshomaru took Rin's hand, "get up, get dressed quickly," he pulled her off their bed. He gave a quizzical look at her and then at their bed, "you let them sleep in our bed?"

Rin wobbled on her feet and landed against Sesshomaru's armor. "Ow," she rubbed her forehead, "yes," Rin walked over to her chest on the ground. She took off her yellow yukata, "are you really watching me?"

Sesshomaru kissed the back of her neck and pulled out a black kimono. He ran is hand down the small of her back. She never wore this one often, black wasn't her color the last time she wore it was for Jinenji's mother's funeral. It was adorned with white sakura petals, "what's going on?" Rin asked again suddenly worried.

Sesshomaru's eyes closed as he held it up for Rin to step in, "Kaede is very sick. Get your coat and boots."

Rin's stomach pitched, she felt ill, "sick?"

Sesshomaru took out a matching black obi and grabbed Rin's sword, "put these on quickly," he went through her other clothes until he found her wool coat. "Very sick," Sesshomaru handed her, her boots.

Sesshomaru hooked his arm around Rin's waist and pulled her to the door, "hold tight to me." He wrapped Rin into his mokomoko and illuminated their garden in a white light.

Rin gripped his shoulders firmly and buried her nose into his neck. She took deep breaths trying to use his scent as a distraction to the roiling in her stomach. When he flew this fast it made her feel sea sick. The cold winter wind whipped at her face. "Very sick?" Rin asked again. "Is she going to die?"

Sesshomaru looked down into Rin's eyes, "yes," he tightened his grip on Rin's waist. "We're almost there." He closed his eyes forcing his yoki to move him even faster. "We're landing, hold on," Sesshomaru thudded to the ground. He took the brunt and set Rin down next to him.

A single fire burned inside of Kaede's hut. Rin ran inside. The villagers were gathered outside, looking into the windows and the door. They split as soon as they saw Sesshomaru. Rin ran through the flap. She ran to Kaede's side. She collapsed onto the floor and picked up Kaede's hand. There were already tears in her eyes, "Kaede-sama," Rin whimpered, "I'm here." Rin touched Kaede's face. It was burning up, "what happened?" Rin looked from Sango to Kagome, and Miroku and Inuyasha. Shippo and Kohaku sat nearby as well.

"She got sick a few days ago, I think it turned into pneumonia, I'm not sure," Kagome answered Rin, "she isn't breathing well."

"Can she hear me?" Rin asked. Kaede lay wrapped in furs, her one good eye shut, her breaths labored.

"Of course she can," Sango rubbed Rin's shoulders.

"I think she was waiting for you," Miroku spoke quietly from the corner.

"Kaede-sama," Rin stroked her hair, she glanced around the full room. It was filled with all of Kagome and Inuyasha's children, Sango and Miroku's, Kirara, Shippo, Kohaku all the people whom Kaede had taken under wings and cared for. "You should see our children now," Rin wiped her nose, "Yuki's so big now, she's eight, and Haru is almost five. He can make a whip like his father, not a very big one but he gets excited when he does it. He still has the black streak down his left ear." Rin touched Kaede's cheek, "I'm sorry I haven't visited recently," Rin smoothed Kaede's hair.

Sesshomaru knelt over Rin. He touched her shoulder. Rin scooted to the side. Sesshomaru bent over and touched Kaede's hand, "sleep with your ancestors."

Rin touched Tenseiga. Sesshomaru shook his head, "her time has come, she's already passed."

Rin turned into Sesshomaru's chest and held him tightly. He returned the embrace. Sango turned to Miroku in similar fashion and Kagome to Inuyasha. The children in the room started crying and clinging to their parents. "The ground is frozen," Inuyasha stroked Kagome's hair, "I might be able to blast some of it loose with Tetsusaiga."

Sesshomaru nodded. He let go of Rin and knelt over Kaede. He pulled the blanket over Kaede's body. He and Inuyasha left the hut. On the way out Inuyasha informed the villagers, "she's passed." There were tears and wails.

Inuyasha removed Tetsusaiga, Sesshomaru removed Bakusaiga. "My forest," Inuyasha directed Sesshomaru. They both walked in the snow until they came to an open field. "At the same time, Kaze no Kizu!"

"Bakusaiga!"

A combination of electric green and white flashed through the snow burning the ground. Steam rose off the forest floor. Inuyasha knelt down and touched the dirt, it was warm to the touch. The villagers were already milling with shovels. Rin, Sango and Kagome held sticks of incense. Jinenji came with seeds.

They brought Kaede's body. She was laid to rest near Goshinboku. The villagers helped to bury her. Rin, Sango and Kagome laid down the incense. Jeninji placed the seeds. "They won't grow," Rin told Jinenji, it's too cold.

Shippo gave a mischievous smile through his red cheeks and tear stained face, "yes they will," he walked forward and touched the ground. The ground illuminated white. The seeds grew roots and dipped into the ground. Pink and white flowers bloomed on top of her grave. White lights and lightening bugs danced in the light that illuminated from Shippo's hand.

Sesshomaru walked behind Rin, he placed his arm around her waist, "do you want to stay longer?"

Rin wiped her eyes, "how much longer will you be away?"

"I can stay the night," he kissed her cheek gently.

"Take me home," she sniffled. Sesshomaru moved closer to Rin, he held her in both arms, when the white light was bright enough he dipped his lips to hers, breathing in her scent and carrying her warmth with him as he flew into the air. "I love you," she wrapped her arms around his neck and cried for the dear friend and mentor she lost.

**therec3iver, Alannada:** Yes more stories! I can't stop, I love these characters.

**Kimmigirl9:**_ Thank you I think I teared up a bit writing some of these too._

**Heartonsleeve22** _I also like imaging what the heck was going on in his head. I think it's only a little clearer in Final Act that the Ice King really does have emotions thanks to Rin and that his heart is very much connected to hers. I still watch the episode where he found her and wonder what was it about her that made him take her. As Ginta and Hakaku once say it makes sense for Inuyasha to take Kagome because she is actually of some use, it never made sense for Sesshomaru to take Rin. My portrayal of Rin has her more of a warrior. :)_


	17. After Harutoga

**Ahh sorry for this taking so long to post to. I gotta put this story in order but I promised another post.**

**I have a few more requests to get through, but this was requested by Esther247. All about what life is like directly after having a baby. This is after Harutoga was born. **

**After Harutoga's Birth**

Her screams rippled across his chest, as if the soundwaves biting against his skin could soothe the pain she was in. As she pushed, she bit down on his collarbone crying while he stroked her hair and whispered in her ears. She was strong, he knew that, but there was something about seeing her writhing against him in pain and sobbing for him to make it stop that made his heart ache. He had done this to her, _again,_ and the elder Miko had the gall to tell him to leave.

The first birth Sesshomaru ever saw was when he was nearing two hundred. His father had woken him in the middle of the night and carried him out to the courtyard while he was still in his pajamas. The elder demon transformed and his son followed suit. Together they flew into the air and landed in the forest where a giant female paced nervously back and forth between a smaller female whose backside looked swollen and her lover who held her giant brown head in his own black paws, licking her neck and nuzzling her nose. _It's good luck for children to be present at a birth, _his father had told him. That was why he was there, he was their good luck charm.

It only occurred to him as he held Rin while she cried that his father had been teaching him how a lover comforts the one bearing their child. Curiosity got the better of him that night as he went to the backside of the mother. Her tail flipped over to reveal a bubble of amniotic fluid, and in a howl that he never forgot the puppy splashed out, soaking him from head to toe, but it was the tenderness of the black furred father licking and nuzzling the female that struck him. He spoke his heart to his lover.

Two weeks later his father woke him again without a word and together they flew to a human village. This time they were in humanoid form as they landed and hidden in a copse of bushes. Inside the hut the mother screamed and cried and begged the gods to kill her and the father sat with other men outside the hut, drinking sake and when he was presented with a female heir, the baby was roughly handed back to the mother and the men left to get drunk. Sesshomaru knew exactly what his father had been trying to teach him that night. _You don't abandon your "she"._

"Shh," he soothed her as the pain subsided. Rin buried her face into his mokomoko and as the next contraction tore into her body he could no longer hear his own thoughts, all he could hear were her cries and all he could feel was the pressure of her teeth against his shoulder. He closed his eyes and pressed his nose into her neck, willing the pain to stop, for him to be anything but useless as he held her.

Suddenly he could see the lips of her vagina change from pink to red, pucker and then spread to reveal two furry ears and then a face that was so like his own and stripes, a nose and a face. He vaguely heard something about a ring of fire but all he could concentrate on was the face slowly revealing itself between her legs and the pressure of her teeth against his collar bone. Her eyes were that of a raccoon and in that moment, as she blessed him with another child, he spoke his heart as he heard the father do the night the puppy was born. He told her how proud he was of her, how strong she was, how much he loved her and how she had changed his life forever.

She cried more when the pain passed and the body seemed to sit there, part of its mother and not, all at once. He shushed her, kissed her neck, wiped her tears and waited for the next pain to come. It seemed like hours that she sat there puffing air against his neck before the rest of the body came out, and then she began to bleed. He was reassured it was normal. The baby was set on Rin's chest and his heart alighted in delight as Rin opened the baby's legs, revealing a boy, his first son. They named him together, for his father and for hers. When the two Mikos and the Slayer were done caring for her nether regions he lifted her into his arms, tired and weak, and carried her to bed. It was there he had been for hours while she slept against him.

Every so often she whined in her sleep as he held her and he soothed her with his lips. He closed his eyes, resting his head against the wall thinking, _is that what you went through with Yuki? While I stupidly left you in pain, alone? _He had to push back the guilt as he gazed at the infant they made together. His hair was silver like his father's, except for a black streak over his left ear. He had a single stripe on his chest and double stripes on his cheeks. He smiled thinking of how much of himself he saw in his son.

A knock on the door brought him out of his thoughts, "O-nisama?"

"What?" he called back. If it were one of his servants there was a significant chance he would have killed them. Even Yuki knew not to disturb them in their bedroom.

"I need to check her bleeding, may I come in?" Kagome said.

"Enter," he said, and sat up straighter as she came in.

"She's so tired," Kagome said as she knelt down and removed the blanket. Kagome chuckled "You are such a man. You didn't put anything between her legs. She's getting the sheet dirty now. Do you have towels?"

"In Yuki's room," he answered, stroking Rin's shoulder.

She came back with a wad of towels and he watched intrigued as Kagome balled one up between her legs and wrapped a second one around her hips. "We change them every few hours. She knows that. Can I check the baby?"

"Leave," he said tersely.

He glanced down at Rin, who seemed unbothered by her legs being moved and only snuggled further into his chest. If he was going to stay more than a few hours, someone else needed to deal with his borders. He loosened himself from her grip. "Sesshomaru?" Her eyes fluttered as she lost the heat of his body next to her.

"Quiet," he knelt next to her on the bed and kissed her again. "Go back to sleep. I'm not leaving." _I'm not leaving. _But that didn't mean he didn't need to deal with his lands. He wasn't meant to come back for two more days and the borders weren't stable. He set Harutoga down and grabbed a black kimono and threw it over his shoulders, dressing quickly. Harutoga slept peacefully, wrapped in his blankets. He hesitated before lifting the child up again and tucking him into his mokomoko. He left the room to find Rin's guard Hisato standing casually outside the door. "Hisato," he said quickly. "Take the sentinels. You will ensure my borders are maintained."

"Until when?" Hisato inquired.

"Until I send a messenger to retrieve you. I will maintain the safety of my home and the village," he left the room and searched for Kagome and Inuyasha. They were with their children in the front of his house, while they played with Sango and Miroku's children. Yuki ran between all the children, giggling and laughing. Kaede sat on the ground drinking tea served to her by Atsuko. He sat down next to her and asked, "How long was her labor?"

"Very long, Sesshomaru-sama," Kaede spoke quietly, eye off in the distance. "She sent for us yesterday afternoon. She had already been in labor from the morning. It was a long time. She was very tired."

"She doesn't look well," he removed the baby from his fluff and cradled him in his arms. Rin's eyes were black, her face red with burst blood vessels and she fell asleep so quickly it was as if she had passed out.

"He's beautiful, Sesshomaru-sama. May I hold him?"

He handed the baby to Kaede. If there was ever a debt that he would be unable to repay in life, it was what he owed to the elderly woman sitting next to him. She had cared for what was dearest to him, giving her a life of warmth and love until Rin returned to his side. "Was she injured down there?"

"No more than most women. You don't need to worry, Sesshomaru-sama. Your wife is strong."

"She is not my wife," he snarled, detesting human terms.

"Then what would you call her?"

_My heart, _he thought. "Wives are given in exchange for goods, they are bedded and left unsatisfied. They are treated as a means to an end to bear heirs. Pathetic human term that does not suit the status Rin has in the life of this Sesshomaru." And he meant it, remembering the father that had rejected his female offspring. Yuki was beautiful and would one day be powerful.

"Chichiue!" she called, running up to him and bounding into his lap. She leaned over looking at the baby, her little nose wiggling. "He smells like rain and dirt."

He tensed his cheeks to keep from smiling. Harutoga did smell like freshly tilled soil and rain and the first blooms of summer. "What are you playing?" he asked his daughter.

"Um…hide and seek, but this Yuki isn't very good at it."

"Use your nose," he gave her a quick peck on her silky, silver hair and sent her back to the other children.

"Whatever she is to you, she's strong. She will heal. You just didn't see it last time. The tearing was less than it was with Yuki, but she will be sore for some time. I assume you know it's not safe to be intimate with her so soon after having a baby?"

He nodded.

"Will you be here? Or leave her in the care of your servants? Look at these ears." She tickled the black one and then the white one.

"I will stay until she is healed."

"She will need to rest. For the first week, she should stay in bed, eat and drink plenty and sleep. Most fathers do not take the babies after they are born."

"Humans."

"Men don't usually come to the birthing either."

"A bad omen when a father misses the birth of his child," he said while removing his baby from her arms.

"Sesshomaru-sama!" Jaken came running from the part of the house that was still under construction. "She is awake, Sesshomaru-sama. She is asking for you."

He nodded and rose from his place, walking quickly through the house until he found her in their attached outhouse. The room was down the hall from their bedroom, he could scent the blood from inside. "Are you okay?" He knocked on the door.

"Yes," Rin called as she staggered out and leaned on the wall. He could tell walking was difficult for her and immediately cursed leaving her unattended. "I'm just sore. You don't need to worry. He's sleeping so soundly." She pulled his fluff away from the baby's face.

He picked her up without asking and carried her back to their bedroom. "You are to rest."

"I had to use the bathroom," she protested as she held onto him. "Ouch," she rolled onto her side to avoid hitting her bottom as she scooted up the bed.

He gathered towels and helped her pack them between her legs before setting Harutoga down to nurse on her side. He threw his kimono off and slid into bed with her, pressing his chest against her side. "When do you have to leave?" her voice broke as she asked.

"I'm not leaving you." He smoothed her hair over her shoulder. "I'm staying home until you are healed."

A slow, happy smile spread across her face. "I should have babies more often."

He shook his head and said, "No. It hurts," he stopped and grit his teeth, but he had promised to speak his heart. "It hurts, to see you hurt. Is it more than with Yuki?"

"The labor was longer but it's not as bad. It just hurts here," she patted the blanket between her legs.

"May I see it?" he said.

"What?"

"I will heal you."

"I don't want a fever after just having a baby, Sesshomaru." She pulled on his chin and pressed her lips into his. "I'm fine."

"You ache." He stroked her shoulder.

"How did you know to come home?"

"You called for me." He buried his nose into her neck.

"I did not." She rolled over to face him, painfully bringing the baby with her. "I mean, I wanted you with me. But I didn't send for you. Did I?"

"I felt your yearning, desperation. I knew you needed me. Let me take your pain away. I can clean the area. I'll be gentle."

She groaned leaning back. "It's going to hurt."

"But it will heal faster. Let me heal you." He wanted to beat the twinging in his heart, it wasn't just that. He opened his mouth to speak, staring down at his son sucking on her nipple then back at her and turned his head to avoid her gaze. "I am useless in labor. Let me be of some use now."

"You weren't useless, my love." Fingers dappled across his chin pulling his face back to hers. "You were what I needed. I'll let you look. You can clean it, if it makes you feel better."

"It will make you feel better," he reminded her, sitting up. Her cheeks flushed, radiating a storm of emotion into their bond. "Why are you embarrassed? I've seen you before."

"Not like this," she whispered quietly, turning away from him. "It's not…I've seen many women after. Most husbands don't spend the time in bed with their wives. They drink sake and celebrate."

"We will celebrate when you are healed," he said, tugging the cover off her middle.

She grabbed it, trying to stop him. "I don't want you to see."

"Rin," he said firmly, taking her hand off the blanket. "You ache, I will clean it. The swelling will go down faster. Let me see." He parted her yukata by her legs and folded down the white cloths between her legs. He hissed seeing the swollen flesh as he helped her part her legs, folding them like a frog off to the sides. "My heart," he said tenderly. "It's very red."

She stared up at their ceiling. "It doesn't feel as bad as it did with Yuki. I can't believe you're looking."

He touched her blood clotted curls with his palm. "I couldn't take your pain while you birthed our son. Let me take it now. The pain will subside. When you are healed, we will celebrate with our village."

"I thought you didn't like the taste of human blood?" she yawned out.

"I don't." He picked up a bucket and left the room to the garden. The sun was still shining as it would until late into the evening. Summer-suns were always long and he was bathed in the humidity of the afternoon. He dipped the bucket into the hot springs and came back into their room. He sat between her parted legs and dabbed at her opening with a wet-cloth to smooth away the clotted blood so he could reach her skin with his tongue. "I won't make you peak."

"I know you," she said playfully. "You will be very stiff soon."

"Then we have a bet. I clean you," he knelt down by her slit, "and if I become stiff you name the terms and if I am not, then I name the terms."

"And what will these terms be?" She smiled at him.

He became pensive. "When you are healed, you will spend an entire day naked in bed with this Sesshomaru. And if you win?"

"You take me with you when I have healed to see the borders."

"Too dangerous."

"Please? What's the point of being the lady of the land if I don't know what our land looks like?"

She had a point and he knew it. He hadn't taken her to see their lands and she was in charge of so much here it would make sense, not to mention he enjoyed when she expressed pride in his accomplishments. "Very well. But you will not engage in battle. I will move slowly. Tell me when it hurts."

Fingers danced along the side of his face as she reached for one of his hands. He held her fingers, feeling her fear radiate in their bond. He knew that if he reduced her discomfort, it wouldn't be nearly as difficult for her to move. He started with her lips, licking around the flesh. He felt her skin warm against his mouth as he caressed her with his tongue. Every so often she exclaimed how sore it was and he would kiss the area as if it would make her heal faster. He came down to where she opened and touched it almost reverently. "I need to open you."

"Okay," she whispered.

He gently parted her and even he could see the cut inside. "What are these?" Inside there was a string that looked like she had been sewn back together.

"Stitches," she said with a confused look on her face. "I thought you knew about them."

"I didn't watch when they cared for you. Why did they sew you?"

"It puts the skin back together," she chuckled, rubbing his head. "Kagome-sama said they use it in her time for many wounds. Especially deep cuts and scrapes. She learned from a friend how to do them. It's not a common practice, but very effective."

"What happens when you are healed?"

"They dissolve. These are special ones from her time."

"Odd," he said shrugging his shoulders. He kissed her lower lips tenderly, before lapping at the skin in and around the stitches, he could feel himself hardening. She was going to win. He let his yoki rise to quiet his lust, then felt the tip of his ear pinched. "Cheater. No using your yoki."

"How do you know that is what I am using it for?" he said playfully. "I'm going to care for the injury now." He couldn't reach very far in with his tongue alone, but was able to swish it around the area. She gripped his free hand tighter, he stopped. "Does it hurt?"

"It stings," she said honestly.

"Almost done," he said, quickly finishing the rest then coming back up to bring her into his chest.

"Where is Yuki?" Rin asked him, while wrapping her hands around his chest and snuggling into his warmth. "I love you."

"And I you. She's with her cousins. You can sleep, my heart. Kaede said it was a long labor."

"So long," she agreed, exhausted. "What are you going to do? Watch me sleep?"

He brought her mouth up to his. "Watch you and my son sleep, spend time with our daughter. Bring dinner to your bedside and ensure you stay in bed and heal. I'm so proud of you. My warrior."

"It hurts less, thank you," she sighed into him, her eyes closing again. "I think I won."

There was something stiff between his legs, he shrugged his shoulders.

"Stay?"

"Forever."

**Please review! It was fun writing Sesshomaru helping Rin recover. I don't know how many readers have experienced childbirth but the first few days after are not fun! I've only done it four times LOL...**

**Mechine: **HAHAHA I know drunk Sesshomaru was great. I hope this one was also more on the lighter side. It's not nearly as funny but I really liked writing it. The time after a baby is born is so special for parents to bond.

**Ch27 Mechine:** Ahh why did Sesshomaru say he would not be fulfilled? Because the time in the Villa was meant to rebuild their relationship on truth and how they both felt about the events in Instinct. Instinct tore them apart and they came to the point where they needed to talk about both their feelings. It was probably forced in a way that extra night with Natsuki but most of that came from not wanting to just go to her one day out of instinct. If he satiated both of them, then Rin/Sess could live in peace. It's hard to understand but both were hurt in Instinct despite the audience only wanting to side with Rin.

**Guest#1:** Someone read this review and asked me to ask you if you watched the Anime...think about it, Inuyasha was not a better mate. He went back and forth between Kikyo and Kagome and the only thing that stopped that was Kikyo dying. Um when is Sesshomaru not a snobby brat in the series? No offense but...Sesshomaru has never in the canon script been well behaved and Rin is a spitfire in my story. It only makes sense that their children would be too.

**Guest#2:** Like it or not Tsukimaru is also his son and also Inuyasha and Kagome's nephew and family is family no matter how they are conceived. Strange why can't Tsukimaru be part of the family other than you think he shouldn't be?

**Consistentguest:** Thank you! I also laughed my ass off writing Drunk Sesshomaru. It was amazing. Have you been reading the Disease?

**Guesswho:** I got 20 on the first chapter of the Disease but 9 on the last chapter, so I like it :). We did good. Thank you thank you! It was hilarious writing Drunk Sess. I try to bring humor in where I can.

**Guest#3:** I know right? That was awesome!

**Smmahamazing:** I swear I have to look at your username like 10x every time I respond because I simply can't spell. I love when the twos fams get together. It's amazing how close they have become. I have always dreamed of the two finding peace and allies with each other and by the time the Disease happens friendship. Drunk sess is the best!

**Esther247x2:** I'm so happy you liked chapter 38! I also love writing sess as the father it's soo much fun! Yeah, drunk, impotent Sesshomaru was freaking hilarious. I was laughing so hard my husband had to read it and then he was laughing hysterically.

**Angel Wing 92:** You are going to have to ask Gobodo-sama. She loves her son and she knew that if he met Natsuki randomly they would bond without choice. His mother doesn't want him to suffer and that's how any mom feels. Question do you have kids? Children make the dumbest comments...here is one real one my kids said. I've been working on losing weight and my son yells no I want a fat mommy and if you get too skinny I will pump you up with air and make you fat again. And if changing a diaper makes someone a good father, no one back then would be because in sengoku that was a woman's job...so NO ONE would be a good husband. Sengoku not 21st century...


	18. Sesshomaru's Regret

**This is for the guest that asked me to write about Sesshomaru's regret. This is honestly a stupid chapter LOL. I wanted to write about how Kagome knows so much about medicine and helping people. Please Review.**

**Sesshomaru's Regret**

Yuki struggled to open her eyes. She felt like her back was on fire. The second she tried to lift herself on the ground she screamed in pain. When she tried to curl into a ball, she sobbed even harder. Yuki's eyes slit halfway. She could tell she was in her room. Her sheets were the most beautiful shade of purple and the futon cradled her form perfectly. Chichiue found them on one of his many trips away. The thought of him being away now terrified Yuki, "Chichiue!" She called trying to bite back the pain of her back. "Chichiue!" She screamed in panic the memories were coming back to her. All of the memories. Yuki tried to help her mother fight the serrow demon he threw her and she felt her back snap and then the world was dark. Before that, the images were flashing threw her mind faster than she could process, the grove, the shadowman and waking up next to the river. "Chichiue! Chichiue!" She sobbed, "Chichiue!"

Yuki saw two knees, black hair, folded over the side of a slender body, "Ka-san?" Her eyes tracked up to the face, it was her Obasan, "no! I don't want you! Where is Chichiue! Chichiue! I want Chichiue!" She slammed her fist onto the marble floor.

"Calm down Yuki," Kagome stroked her hair, "it's okay, he's meeting Totosai right now."

Yuki slammed her hand down onto her bedding again, "I don't want you! I want Chichiue! Chichiue! Chichiue!" She sobbed, "Chichiue!"

Inuyasha walked into the room. Yuki lay on the floor sobbing and screaming for her father. He yanked Kagome out of the way when Yuki's claws came hacking at Kagome's knees. "She wants her father," Kagome stood up.

Kagome turned around to face Sesshomaru. Sesshomaru knelt down over Yuki, he touched her tear stained face. He smoothed her matted hair, "Chichiue," Yuki put her hand over his, "you're here. My back hurts, it hurts really bad, I can't move."

Then came in the bottle eyed old man in striped clothing. "Oy she doesn't need a sword," Totosai bent over Yuki. His bug eyes looked into her golden ones, "I didn't see it before, her yoki was fighting something. You said a serrow demon Inuyasha?"

"Yeah, he cast a spell on Rin taking her memories and blocked Yuki and Harutoga from remembering what happened that day," Inuyasha answered.

"Get out! All of you!" Yuki screamed, "I don't want you here! I just want Chichiue."

"Leave," Sesshomaru ordered them. "Calm down Yuki."

Kagome and Inuyasha left the room.

"It hurts," Yuki cried.

Sesshomaru bent down, he carefully pulled Yuki into his lap, "Totosai, explain."

Totosai scratched his head. He hobbled over and tickled Yuki's chin. She batted his hand off, "serrow demons have powerful yoki, that's what enables them to take the mates of Dai-yokai. Her yoki was battling the foreign yoki inside of her, that's why she kept changing. I'll leave the swords, but you shouldn't need them again until the children are fully grown."

"Get out!" Yuki shrieked again, "make him leave! Get out!" She tried to claw Totosai with her claws.

Totosai jumped out of the way, "her father's temper to boot."

Sesshomaru carried Yuki out the door to the garden. Harutoga played in the daisies with Akari who watched him. Yuki continued crying. "Yuki," Sesshomaru sat down next to the hot springs.

"It hurts!" She screamed at her father, "make it stop hurting!"

"Chichiue will help you, but you must listen to me," Sesshomaru tried to soothe her.

"No!" She screamed at the top of her lungs.

"Akari, bring her a towel and clean clothes," Sesshomaru set Yuki down next to the hot springs. He removed her yukata revealing her battered back. It reminded him of how Rin's back looked the first week they were bonded. Yuki had slept for a full day, and the injuries would have been fatal if she were not a hanyou. Sesshomaru tossed off his haori, removed his shoes and slid into the hot springs. Standing the water came up just below his rib cage. Sesshomaru turned around and pulled Yuki into the water with him. He cradled Yuki and held her in his lap. She continued to shake and scream against his chest about the pain. He waited for the water to do the same as it had done for Rin all those years before.

Slowly Yuki's crying calmed to hiccups and gasps. "You never let us in the hot springs, you said it was just for you and Ka-san," she rest her head against his mokomoko.

Sesshomaru suppressed a grin, "I am making an exception. We are going to train again," he adjusted Yuki so she leaned forward in his lap. He supported her front with his free arm and ladled water over her back with the other.

"That hurts," she whimpered.

"Find your yoki." He waited to feel the small rise in yoki from his daughter.

The rise came and fell only seconds later. Yuki's breath became staggered. "It's too hard to hold it, it hurts too much." She gripped his wrist.

Sesshomaru chuckled, "I'm going to teach you to heal yourself. Listen to me and the pain will be less. Find your yoki," he instructed her, "relax your breathing."

"Okay," Yuki closed her eyes, she focused on deep even breaths. She breathed in and out for a few minutes, she opened her eyes and grasped her yoki.

"Good, now, tell your body to heal your back," Sesshomaru poured water over the battered skin. He had to keep his knees pointed up or Yuki's head would be under the water. He pushed himself higher up to get a better view. He watched in pride as the bruises began to fade. The black and blues faded to light purple. "Don't hold your breath."

Yuki let out her tense breath, she closed her eyes and clenched her teeth. The bruises continued to fade until she collapsed in his arms, "that's all I can do," she muttered weakly. Her head swayed in his arms. Within moments she was asleep. Sesshomaru inspected Yuki's back. The bruises faded substantially. She wasn't able to heal herself completely but enough that he knew she felt relief from the pain she was in.

Inuyasha came with a towel and a clean Yukata for Yuki. "Kagome said to keep her in light clothes. Akari went to get some food for Yuki."

Sesshomaru flew out of the hot springs. He took the towel from Inuyasha and dried Yuki off.

"I overheard that, since when can a hanyou force their wounds to heal?" Inuyasha asked Sesshomaru in disbelief.

Sesshomaru flicked his eyes at Inuyasha and dressed Yuki. He set her down on the bedding in the garden and covered her up. "Since always," he walked towards his bedroom to change his clothes.

Kagome sat next to Rin at the head of the bed. She had to admit the sheets and the futons in this place were impressive. At her hut in the village she slept on a plain bamboo mat. Here Sesshomaru had fluffy bed rolls on the ground with smooth cotton and silk sheets. The ones Rin currently slept on were royal blue and sea green. _I wonder where he gets the money for all this? _She thought to herself. Kagome shook her head and went back to the task at hand. Getting fluids inside Rin. She had been asleep for a day now. Her skin was deathly pale. Kagome pressed her index and middle finger to Rin's neck, she was sure that her heart-rate was ok, at least she thought it was. She yearned for the medicine of her time to fix Rin. At times it seemed as if Rin would wake up. Her eyes fluttered but then she was asleep again. Kagome asked Atsuko to bring her some soup broth and a water bottle.

Sesshomaru entered the room, bare from the waist up. Kagome flushed, he was attractive. Kagome was in love with Inuyasha but didn't mean she was blind. It was even more disturbing when he leaned over into one of the many trunks that lined the wall and pulled out dry clothes only to start taking off what was left of his clothing, "Dammit Sesshomaru!" Kagome fled the room and leaned her back against the wall, "ask me to leave the room before you do that!"

"Why?" Sesshomaru's voice came back.

"Because it's not modest, baka," Inuyasha's voice was in the room with Sesshomaru. "Seriously, how can a hanyou heal themselves? Ahh!"

Kagome heard liquid falling to the ground and Inuyasha grunting in pain. When she turned the corner Sesshomaru was dressed in dry white hikama with his hand completely through Inuyasha's left shoulder. Blood dripped from his claws, "heal yourself." Sesshomaru pulled his hand out.

Inuyasha grunted and fell to the ground.

"That's it, I've had it with you doing things like that to him!" Kagome stormed into the room, "O-ni-sama, this is too much!"

"What will you do Miko?" Sesshomaru asked condescendingly.

Kagome placed her index fingers together and began chanting. Sesshomaru eyed her curiously. The beads of subjugation left Inuyasha neck and flew towards Sesshomaru's. He batted them away like they were fleas as each one attempted to connect to his neck with the most bored expression on his face. Kagome called on her spiritual powers and flung Sesshomaru against the wall. She could see him struggling against the invisible bonds that held him. She felt a rise in his yoki as he fought her seal. Kagome began chanting again this time the beads formed a circle around Sesshomaru's neck. When the necklace was completed Kagome yelled, "Sesshomaru, osuwari!"

The beads lit up for only a moment before they broke and fell to the ground. Sesshomaru started laughing, "is that the extent of your powers?" His eyes pitched red as he broke through the seal she placed on him. "Pathetic."

"No it wasn't," Kagome removed a knife from her sleeve, "but if you keep pushing I'll show you them," her eyes lit the most azure pink color to match Sesshomaru's red eyes. She flung him back against the wall. He snarled trying to remove himself from her grip. His skin started sizzling as she continued walking forward, "now, tell Inuyasha how to heal himself or I'm going to seal you to the wall of your own house!"

Sesshomaru ground his teeth, he called on more of his yoki. As his rose, so did the power coming from Kagome. They were in a battle of wills, she could not seal him completely and he could not escape her grasp. He refused to be the first to yield and flung more power at her. Her power rose to match his, sweat dripping from her brow. "How long can you last Miko? When you still don't know the extent of your own power?"

Kagome wrinkled her nose.

She looked down at Inuyasha who breathed heavily in a pool of his own blood, "just show him how to heal himself and I will let you go."

"Inuyasha find your yoki and direct it towards the wound, though I doubt it will be strong enough to heal it completely," Sesshomaru snarled, "now release this Sesshomaru. You cannot seal me completely you lack the control."

"And you lack the power the escape," Kagome folded her arms and released Sesshomaru.

He looked at her with another bored expression while he walked to Rin and knelt down by her bed, "why won't you wake?" He stroked the hair out of her eyes.

Inuyasha pulled himself off the ground, he felt his shoulder mostly healed, it was reduced to a dull ache. He rolled his eyes at Sesshomaru and left the room.

Kagome stalked over to Rin's other side, "actually I was coming to you to ask a favor, two actually. One of them I hope will Rin. My brother Sota in my time, he just finished medical school, he's the same age as Rin."

"_Medical School?" _Sesshomaru looked confused.

"Where people learn to become doctors, anyway he's going into obstetrics."

"_Obstetrics?" _Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow at Kagome like she was crazy.

"If I have to explain every word from my time, it's going to take all day for you to understand. Things are different in my world, there aren't any yokai. We have really advanced medicine, better than herbs, he can probably help me find out why she hasn't woken up yet. But even on Aun it's going to take too long to get back and forth to the village, you can fly faster than Aun right?"

Sesshomaru nodded.

"Because I'm probably going to have to come here and back a few times, and I don't know if it's safe to move Rin right now, I want to ask my brother about Rin. And I want to bring our children here, I figured I would send Aun and when I get there between Aun and Kirara bring them back here."

"Your children are welcome. As for the other request, allow me to finish dressing and I will take you back to the well. No yokai? I do not exist five hundred years from now?"

"If you do, I haven't seen you or anyone else," Kagome answered. "I'll let you get dressed."

When the door closed Sesshomaru laydown next to Rin. He gingerly touched her hair moving it from her face, "wake up Rin," he begged her, "come back to me." He closed his eyes and let his yoki search through her body for any sign there was something he had missed, something he had failed to heal. He was met with nothing, her body felt no pain. The paleness remained, her chest rose and fell softly. "I miss you," he whispered in her ear.

He rose off the ground, glared at the puddle of blood Inuyasha left and found his haori. He put his armor back on and tied his swords to his waist. He went out to the hallway and held his hand out to Kagome, "come." He gave her only a moment to grasp his fingers before they disappeared into a white light. The drag on his yoki made him nearly gasp for breath. He had not fully recovered from the yoki he gave to the fox demon children or from what he had forced inside of Rin. The thought made him feel better, if he wasn't weakened he would have been able to fling her holy energy back at Kagome. She clung to his neck uncomfortably. Sesshomaru gripped Bakusaiga in one hand to speed their journey. After a short period of time he landed next to the well.

"I'll be back," Kagome said.

Sesshomaru watched as she disappeared into the well. He regarded it coolly before he jumped inside after her. Instead of disappearing his feet landed on the dirt. He flew out and saw the same village he was in before, _odd, _he thought to himself as he waited for Kagome to return. He sat next to the well for an hour before Kagome came struggling through the well with a heavy bag. "Can you take this?" She motioned to the bag.

Instead of taking the bag he grabbed Kagome by the back of her shirt and hoisted her, bag and all out of the well. "What did he say? This brother?"

"He gave me instructions and some supplies, now, let's go back."

Sesshomaru rolled his eyes as he hooked Kagome around the waist and flew back towards his home with the same speed he had travelled to the village. His chest felt tight with exertion, he hoped she didn't need many more trips to figure out why Rin still slept. As they flew he asked Kagome, "explain to me, your time is 500 years in the future?"

"Yes."

"This brother is a healer?"

"A doctor, it's like a healer, but in my time doctors have specialties. He wants to deliver babies."

"Strange occupation for a man, isn't that women's work?"

"Not in my time," Kagome clung to his neck again, "this makes me feel sick flying this fast."

"Rin also feels sick at this speed. What did he say?"

"He thinks Rin lost too much blood and may not recover without a blood transfusion and before you ask let me explain what it is. You take blood from someone else and put it into the person by their veins with a small tube. Unfortunately he can't get blood from the hospital and I don't know how to place IV's. IV's are tubes that go inside veins, oh kami, do you have veins."

Sesshomaru glanced back long enough to look at Kagome like she was an idiot.

"Here see this?" Kagome held out her wrist, "see these blue things? These are veins, it's how the blood circulates in our bodies. Great, when we go back I'll bring you a book to read, it's called Grey's Anatomy, you can read right?"

"This Sesshomaru is perfectly capable to read."

"This is modern Japanese though."

"You question my intelligence?"

"Ok…ah!" They landed with a thud as Sesshomaru stumbled. It caused Kagome to land in a pile on top of her big black bag, "you haven't recovered completely have you, that's why you couldn't break past my seal?"

Sesshomaru ignored that comment as he walked into the room.

Kagome hefted the heavy bag into the room. Sesshomaru watched curiously as she put something strange onto her wrist that made a weird ticking sound. She took out another object that had two metal pieces and a floppy thing that she put in her ears. At the end was a white circular disk. "What are you doing?" Sesshomaru grabbed Kagome's hand when she reached for Rin's chest.

"Do you really think I would hurt Rin?" Kagome smacked his hand away. "This is called a stethoscope, it lets you listen to your heart, here," she took the two pieces off her ears and placed them over Sesshomaru's ears. She put the white disk over her heart, "hear it?"

Sesshomaru raised his hands to his ears in shock, "yes." His eyes glazed over in shock.

Kagome took the stethoscope from him, "I'm going to measure her heartbeat. You can also hear someone's breathing with this and the sounds of intestines." Kagome put the stethoscope back on her own ears and listened to Rin's heartbeat while watching the thing on her wrist. "I'm measuring a minute," she told Sesshomaru, "and counting how many beats I hear…seems okay, it's about 50 beats a minute, and she was in good shape before this."

Kagome took out another thing Sesshomaru had never seen before. She wrapped a strange material around Rin's upper arm then pressed something that made the rectangle it was connected to light up, "what is that?"

"A blood pressure cuff, it's going to inflate around her arm and tell me the amount of blood pumping through her body, I have to give it back to Sota when we are done," Kagome informed Sesshomaru, "that's low too."

"What does it say?" There were strange digits he hadn't seen on the screen before."

"79/45, it means it's low. Sota is probably right, I have no idea how we would manage a transfusion here."

"Can she not go through the well?"

"No, only Inuyasha and I, and Izayoi and my son Sota can go through whenever we want, Mayumi and Taisho, sometimes yes, sometimes no, which brings me to the next favor I need from you," Kagome took the cuff on Rin's arm and pulled out a red box. "I need to poke her finger to make it bleed."

"I'll do it," Sesshomaru took Rin's hand.

"Wait, I need to sterilize it first, this tests…well let's just say there are different elements in blood and this one will tell me about one of the elements if it's low then Sota will tell me how to fix it, I hope," Kagome took out a small packet and removed something wet that smelled sharp and made Sesshomaru's nose wrinkle. She took his hand and wiped the claw on his index finger then cleaned one of Rin's fingers, "I just need a few drops."

Sesshomaru made a small gash in the tip of Rin's finger. Kagome took the finger and wiped the first drops off before squeezing more blood out. Rin groaned in her sleep. Sesshomaru rubbed Rin's cheek. She dropped the blood onto a clear slide then put the slide in the strange red plastic box, "that's low too. It's supposed to be over 12, it's at 8." Kagome packed up the items that her brother had sent her with. She had written down all the numbers onto her pad of paper. "There's no way he can get me blood for her."

"Could my blood work?"

"It's probably too strong for her O-ni-sama, and I don't know anything about mixing human and yokai blood. We could use mine if it was the same type, but we don't know her type and I don't know how to draw blood, let's go."

"Does this mean she won't recover?"

"That's what we are going back for, so I can ask my brother," Kagome held the big bag. Sesshomaru wrapped his arm around Kagome's waist and flew into the air again. His shoulders felt tight from the strain, this wasn't good, his yoki was still recovering and the idiotic battle of wills he got into with the Miko also wasn't helpful. He gripped Bakusaiga again for more strength.

"Look part of the favor I want to ask you is if you can watch Sota and Taisho for me, for a while, well…the better part of the next two years, I know it's a big favor to ask," Kagome yelled over the wind whipping past them, "I want to go back to my time and go to nursing school, it will give me more skills to help people here. Sota and Taisho don't want to live in my time, it's too hard for Sota he doesn't look like the other kids and Taisho isn't interested. They want to learn more about their yoki. Once I get Mayumi through the well I can't risk taking her back home, she's going to go to school in my time and Izayoi is going to stay with my mom during the day. I just have to figure out how to pay for it. School is expensive in my time."

"This Sesshomaru will provide the fee, how much gold is it"

"We don't use gold in my time…but how much gold do you have?"

Sesshomaru landed less than gracefully next to the well again, stumbling as he gripped the wood for support before he fell to his knees. He let out a frustrated growl. "Your children are welcome in my home, I have much gold in my storehouses, when we return you may take what you need."

"Thanks! I'll be back," Kagome jumped through the well with her backpack in tow. She came back after only a matter of minutes and tossed Sesshomaru a book, "Greys Anatomy, this is about human anatomy."

"_Anatomy_?"

"Just read it until I come back okay?" Kagome plopped back down into the well.

Sesshomaru flipped through the pages with extensive pictures of the human body. He had gutted and ripped the insides out of many humans and demons, he made a mental note the next time he did to examine their contents more closely. There were names for everything. He was fairly certain he had eaten a human liver before and found it not the best flavored thing in the world. He flipped through the book until he came across the female anatomy. Whoever they drew the picture had obviously never seen his Rin, she was much more beautiful even pregnant than the figure in the book.

He touched the figure of the child in the womb cursing himself for leaving Rin and his children again. His heart yearned to be back home. Another page showed the gestation of the fetus in the mother's womb. When the picture came to 16 weeks, he felt a tightness in his chest, that was how his child looked that lay limp in the bed next to Rin. If it had been a fully human gestation she would have been around the fourth month. Sesshomaru growled to himself, he felt tired. The sky was beginning to cast over in a golden glow. Yuki would wake up again and probably hate him for not being there more than it already felt like she did. He was grateful that Harutoga seemed to not really be aware of what was going on, even when Rin's memories were gone. It was obvious he missed his mother but the boy always had a quieter more easy going personality than his sister.

Sesshomaru's mind wandered to when Yuki was a baby. Rin would practically throw her at Sesshomaru the moment he landed, slam their door behind her and before he could even say hello, she would be fast asleep in bed. At night Yuki would caterwaul in her mother's arms until Sesshomaru took her. Only then would she be calmed, which meant that Yuki only slept when Sesshomaru was home to hold her. Rin would spend however many nights with an agitated Yuki waiting for his return. _I should never have left them for so long. _

He tapped his claws annoyed on the well, waiting for the Miko to make her return. By the time she did it was nearly nightfall again. "Okay, my brother said, she's anemic, that means there isn't enough iron in her blood and she probably lost more than her body can replace. We just spent forever at the medical school library trying to figure out how to treat her without modern medicine. Basically her blood volume is too low and we need to bring it up. The only thing he could get out of the hospital he is assigned to is saline, but I don't really know how to place an IV," Kagome sat on the well, "Sota tried to teach me but then his arms got sore."

Sesshomaru held his arm out, "if it will help her practice on my arm."

"I only have three needles to try with, although, you don't get infections right?"

"_Infections?"_

"Have you ever been sick even?"

"Never. That is something for hanyous and humans not Dai-yokai." He gave her his arm, "these blue things are veins no?"

"So you did read?"

"Some," he glanced at the book he hadn't closed it after setting it aside. It was still open to the pictures with growing babies.

Kagome closed the book gently and set it aside, "I'm sorry. When we lost our baby, it was very hard for us. She was so beautiful, she had Inuyasha's ears. We were attacked in the forest by yokai, I was trying to get the boys to safety when my foot got stuck on a tree root. I fell on my side and then I started bleeding."

Sesshomaru found it odd that he was actually interested in listening.

"Rin ran to help me, she helped me get the boys home, then it just happened before I could get through the well, she caught the baby, told me it was a girl, we spent the next week crying together. It almost seems unfair, Rin was only twelve and a half at the time," Kagome took out the IV kit. "Is this even going to be able to puncture your skin."

"It will now," Sesshomaru adjusted the firmness of his skin, another skill he possessed.

"Okay," she took out an orange band and tied it around Sesshomaru's upper arm, "we blamed ourselves for a long time," she twisted Sesshomaru's arm around until she saw one of his veins poke up through the skin, "you're really okay with this?"

He nodded.

"I hope you don't blame yourself. Inuyasha spent forever blaming himself, but then I got pregnant again, we haven't forgotten her, the baby we lost, but it helped to move on."

Sesshomaru considered her words, it was probably easier for Kagome to get pregnant than it was for Rin. It would take time for both of them, to allow him to approach her in that way again. Sesshomaru felt a tickle on his skin. "Missed, I told you I'm not very good at this. I suppose if I don't have to worry about you getting sick, then I can just use the same needle over and over, and you heal fast so I don't have to worry about collapsing your veins. Okay." Kagome went to work trying to figure out how to place an IV on Sesshomaru. Eventually the needle started bending to the side and nearly broke. She took out another kit leaving her only one to work on Rin with. She found another vein that was slightly bigger than the last and pushed the needle and catheter through, she pulled back the syringe, a flash of red filled the vial, "I did it!"

"Do it again," he pulled it out.

Kagome focused and pushed the IV in and missed, "dammit," she continued working on his arm until an hour later when she was finally able to hit the same vein many times. His arm looked as it always did pristine. His yoki fought against the needle threatening to break it and the skin healed as soon as the needle was removed. "Let's go back now."

Sesshomaru could hear Yuki screaming before he even landed. Hisato had her around the shoulders while Akari was threatening her with a ball of fire and Inuyasha was standing nearby with claw marks on his face. Sesshomaru landed roughly again, he knew he wouldn't be able to make another trip back to the well, not before he rested, "Yuki," he looked at her. She immediately stopped fighting and ran to Sesshomaru. She buried her face in his side.

"Stop leaving!" She screamed and attempted to punch him in the side.

Sesshomaru knelt down, "come with me," he picked Yuki up and carried her into their home. He sat down on the futon next to Rin as Kagome came in. He pulled Yuki into his lap. Harutoga bounded into the room and curled up against Sesshomaru's other side. "Obasan needed to speak to her ototo to help kasan." Sesshomaru told Yuki, "I will not leave again."

"It's your fault," Yuki told him, her eyes splintered with red spiderwebs, "it's your fault this happened to her, you weren't here. She wasn't strong enough."

"Do not talk about your Ka-san like that," Sesshomaru corrected Yuki. Sesshomaru eyed Kagome as she tied the same strip around Rin's arm. If he understood what the Miko said, Rin lost too much blood. He held one of his mate's hands and rubbed her fingers in between his own, "Ka-san is very strong. Miko, what is said in this room stays in this room."

Kagome looked up from her work on Rin's arm, she nodded.

"Yuki," he cupped the face of the little girl on his lap, "do you think Chichiue doesn't regret being here? I do, or that if I could go back a month or more and see that the healer was paying too much attention, or that Ka-san was so unhappy? You are still a child, you didn't see what happened right before you were born."

"I know your other weird brother tried to kill me and Kasan, so you decided to make a home to keep us safe, but it's not safe here."

"I can't protect you from everyone, I learned that when Ka-san was a child. I left her in Obasan's village and even though she was with warriors, there were times she was hurt. Attacked by yokai, attacked by thieves, thrown into a river where she almost drowned. I regret not being here, I regret leaving you so often, but I cannot go back and fix it," it pained him to admit it. "Do you understand?"

Yuki wiped her nose, "I think so," she curled up on Sesshomaru's chest, "will she ever wake up."

"That's why I was gone with Obasan, to try to help Ka-san," Sesshomaru patted Yuki's shoulder.

"I got it," Kagome smiled, "the saline should help." She opened the door to Yuki's room and hung the bad on top of the door. "Sota said she would still be dizzy and that it would take a while for her to recover, he gave me these for when she does." She handed Sesshomaru a bottle of strange objects that looked like beads, "they are iron pills, try to get her to swallow three with water a day, if she can't, grind them up and put them in juice or something. It's the best we can do with the medicine that I can bring back."

Sesshomaru nodded. "Give him my thanks. Now leave." He didn't say that he wanted to be alone with Rin and his children. He gave Harutoga a pat on the head, "did you behave today Harutoga?"

"I got in the kitchen and stole a cookie," he smiled, "Akari said if I did it again she would make both my ears black."

Sesshomaru chuckled, "next time take two."

"Chichiue I don't like when you are gone," Harutoga told Sesshomaru, "it makes right here hurt." The little boy touched his heart, "and it's more fun when you are home."

"How long are you staying?" Yuki inquired.

"Until the barrier is up again and I know that Ka-san has recovered," Sesshomaru sighed, he might as well be honest, "and until I have recovered as well."

"You don't look hurt," Yuki looked him up and down.

"Too much yoki," Sesshomaru nudged her, "when I leave again Harutoga, Yuki you will come with me, and Ka-san. I will not leave you for longer again."

"Ka-san was sad a lot when you were gone, she cried at night, when she thought I was sleeping. She told the Healer she missed battle," Yuki spoke quietly. "She said she was bored here, she felt useless."

Sesshomaru's stomach tightened, his heart ached, _why didn't you tell me? _He stroked her hair, _did you think I wouldn't have found some way to make you feel useful again. My heart, why didn't you tell me you were so unhappy._

**Please review! **


	19. Rebirth

**Yay thank you all for reviewing and for reading wow! I have a 3 week break before my next classes. Oh the creative bug is flying!**

**If anyone is familiar with House of the Moon by resmiranda she graciously allowed me to spoof it. If you liked the Big Spoof, you'll love this!**

**I've been working on kiss of fate with Kimmigirl9. It's literally a 50/50 endeavor and so worth reading. We're both in love with it. **

**Trafficked will get a new chapter I hope during the break. **

**I plan on writing another Avatar one-shot that's also meant to be hilarious :) So please check out my profile for new titles. **

**Rebirth**

If she had a choice, she would follow her father to the borders when he left. Yuki never enjoyed being stuck at home when he was gone, especially with how often he had been gone lately. He came home stinking of ogres and other demons that Yuki could identify and others that she couldn't. There were snakes, bears and one time he even came home sick from a mamoshi bite to the ankle. She never understood if he was as powerful as he was how snake poison could take Chichiue down. But then again, there were a lot of things she just didn't understand.

But then there were times that she preferred her mother's company. The healer had been dead for two weeks and although she heard her mother crying at night, and at times she had nightmares, her mother was slowly returning. Then it was the middle of the night and Yuki heard the sound of pounding feet and a feline smell. It was Akari. Yuki's door flew open and Akari knelt down next to her, "I need your mother."

Yuki rubbed her tired eyes. She hadn't been able to sleep because of her own dreams. "Why?"

"Atsuko is having her baby. Something is wrong. The midwives don't know what to do. Hurry. Is your father in there?"

Yuki sniffed the air twice, "yeah. I think he's sleeping." He had slept every night since the Healer's death and that alone scared her. Chichiue never slept. She pulled herself out of her tangle of covers and her little brother that was melded to her back and pulled open the door to her parents room. They had unlocked it after Rin had gotten her memories back. She made no moves to control the sound of her feet and leapt over their intertwined legs. Her mother was dressed in a rose colored Yukata that was sleeveless and her father had only green hikama on. His arms that were strong and muscle-bound were wrapped around his mother's shoulders and waist.

Lightening flashed outside and then thunder boomed making her jump and cover her ears. One of the downsides of having such sensitive hearing, it sounded like someone had bellowed in her ears. She nearly tripped over her parents legs but was caught her by her father's arms and very alert golden eyes, "you know you aren't allowed in here at night."

"Akari is outside, she said Atsuko is having her baby and something is wrong. She needs Ka-san."

He stroked Ka-san's brow so lovingly and shook her shoulders, "wake up my heart. Wake up." He buried his mouth in her neck making Yuki cover her mouth with shy giggles.

"Get Tenseiga," he said to Yuki. She ran to the corner of their room and pulled out the rusty sword she had only heard of. She knew that this sword was responsible for bringing both her mother and her father back from the dead. Chichiue died the day she was born and was brought back by her Uncle, her Uncle died the day before and was brought back by her father and her mother died when she was eight, twice. He was already out of bed dragging her mother with him, throwing her into one of her rattier brown Kimonos. "Go back to bed."

She handed the sword to her father and then asked, "can I go too?" This was when she liked being with her mother the most. She knew her mother learned under an old Priestess but she had done it to appease the old woman and because when she was younger she loved babies. Ka-san always said it was before the way of the warrior called her, but everyone, especially every woman could benefit from knowing about birth.

"Come on Yuki," Rin said holding a hand out to her daughter. "My love," she whispered to her father. "Who will watch Haru?"

"Hisato," Sesshomaru said quickly, as Yuki scrambled onto her father's back, just as he grabbed his mother around the waist. "Do you need any herbs?"

"No," Rin answered. "Nobuatsu will have them."

Her father nodded and they disappeared so quickly it made Yuki's eyes blister and her cheeks burn at the speed. The moon was waning and hanging high in the sky. Yuki was told that typically men didn't attend births but because so many of the men in their village were demons of one sort or another, they were often in the huts with the women as they birthed. It was messy business, but Yuki thought it was beautiful the way a woman opened to give to create a new life. She had seen many of the children born in the village. She once caught a half-wolf demon and a cat hanyou. "Why did Chichiue bring Tenseiga."

"Just in case," Rin said as she led Yuki into the hut.

Nobuatsu leaned over his lover as she lay weakly moaning on her back. He rubbed herbs onto her stomach that made Yuki's nose itch. There were three other women in the room, one of them was a bat-hanyou and the other two human women. They parted when Rin came forward and knelt down. Her mother never asked questions, "come on Yuki, put your hands on her belly."

"Something is wrong Rin-sama," Nobuatsu always spoke with a soft voice but the tone and the way his skin was prickling with a pepper like smell made Yuki nervous. He was scared.

The sheets between Atsuko's legs were covered in blood and her skin was so pale she put the moon to shame. "What do you feel on her stomach?" Her mother took her hands and put them against the abdomen.

"She's too weak to scream in pain?" Yuki said afraid. "Well…and, is the baby the wrong way?" She had learned how to palpate a stomach from her mother. If the baby was the right way the base of the skull was hard just above the hip bones and wiggled, but if it was the wrong way the baby's whole body would move and the wiggly part was at the top of the tummy. The easiest way to check was between the legs. "Can I look? But Ka-san? I don't hear the baby," she bent over Atsuko's swollen belly. Her ears were like her father's. She could hear the weak thud of Atsuko's heart giving up, but the baby's was absent.

"We need to hurry, get Chichiue."

"Why?"

"Nobuatsu," her mother touched the father's hand gently. There was something said in that touch that Yuki didn't quite understand. Was it pity? Compassion? "We need to cut the baby out."

He shook his head with tears in his silver eyes. "No."

"Listen to me, Yuki now. These knives aren't sharp enough."

"I can do it," Yuki volunteered.

"Next time, get Chichiue. His claws are sharp enough to cause her the least amount of pain."

"NO!" Nobuatsu yelled.

"Listen to me, she has already lost too much blood. I can save them both, but you must let me cut the baby out before it's too late. I can't feel it moving. The harbingers come faster for the unborn, he can save them both."

Yuki ran outside through the throng of people and yelled, "Chichiue!" at the top of her lungs.

She found him in a circle, speaking with the other sentinels. He turned quickly following Yuki into the hut. They came back to find Nobuatsu cradling his lover. Her weak head in his hands. Somehow Chichiue knew what Ka-san needed from him. He knelt down and sliced into the stomach and pulled the baby out by its red, bottom. Yuki covered her mouth as the blood oozed out the side. "She's not breathing," he set the purple baby down next to its mother.

"What's he doing?" Yuki held her mother's hand, tears came from her cheeks.

"Don't cry little one," Rin held her daughter. "Atsuko lost too much blood. Chichiue is waiting for her to die. When the harbingers come, he'll destroy them with Tenseiga, she'll be healed and whole."

"What about the baby?"

"It's dead," Sesshomaru said as he knelt over the child. Even Yuki saw his hand trembling.

"Can you save it?" But then she covered her mouth in shock, not wanting to talk about the baby that her father wasn't able to save, the one that he buried under the red Camellias in their garden, the one that Ka-san cried about at night. "Ka-san?"

But her mother had tears in her eyes, "he'll save them both."

Nobuatsu sat unmoving crying over his lover. Even his tears were as quiet as his voice, like a brook. It was moments like these, she needed to be closer to her mother than her father. "Is she in pain?"

"She's lost too much blood to be in pain," her mother said quickly.

Tenseiga was unsheathed.

"Will they be able to have more babies?"

"Tenseiga is a sword of healing," her mother said faithfully, "as soon as he sees them, Atsuko will be healed."

"Does Chichiue love Atsuko?"

That made Rin snort, "he has compassion for all of those that live in our village."

"When they serve a purpose," Chichiue said tersely. But his fingers were still shaking and his scent changed. He smelled like salt, sorrow and mourning.

"Chichiue? Are you sad because you can save this baby and you couldn't save ours?" Yuki held his fingers.

"Yuki," her mother tried to scold her but she shook her off.

She held her father's hand and hugged his arm. "It's okay Chichiue." She gazed at her father with the love, adoration and faith that only an eight year old girl could as he raise the katana and slashed through something she couldn't see.

Even she heard the soft thudding of the baby and it's shrieks. Nobuatsu sobbed in relief. It wasn't Nobuatsu that knelt down and wrapped the squalling infant in a blanket, it was her father. He held onto her, sniffing her forehead for a few seconds before handing her to Atsuko just as the woman's eyes opened. "Congratulations." Her father said and then he left.

Her mother knelt down next to Atsuko with a big grin on her face and tears in her eyes. "You did it." Her mother said.

"Ka-san, are they okay now?"

"They're fine now. You'll see," Rin placed a palm on the baby's head. "Everyone gets a second chance."

"Will you we get one too?"

Her mother didn't answer. "Let's give you some time alone with your new baby."

"Thank you Rin-sama," Atsuko hugged her mother. "Thank you."

"It wasn't me," her mother said humbly.

"We both know, without you, he never would be who he is," Atsuko whispered exhausted. "You'll have another one. I want to name her Rin."

Her mother only smiled, "enjoy her."

She followed her mother and helped to wash her hands as they left the hut. Outside her father was waiting. He held a hand out to Rin and motioned to his back to Yuki. "Do you remember them being so small?" Rin asked Sesshomaru.

"Yuki fit here," he pointed to his mokomoko. "Harutoga was bigger than she was."

"He was not!" Yuki protested curling into her father's back and giggling when his free hand found her foot.

They flew slower this time, letting the wind beat at their skin. "We will stay until after the celebration."

"I thought you wanted to leave sooner."

"New life, my heart. It should be celebrated."

**Remember to review!**

**Oh stories to plug! Dog Tags by Lemonlush amazing Inu/Kag**

**Cruelest Winter by AM78, Mir/Sango also wonderfully written**

**AM78: **Most of the time I totally forget about Jaken. Like there are literally scenes where I forget about him. He gets some love time in Drabbles and in Lost Memories and instinct. I have no idea about Kirara but I do know some animals like Huskies have extra layers of skin and fur to keep them warm when it's cold.


	20. Hisato Life of a Guard

**This takes place after Lost Memories. ***Lots of Spoilers if you have Read it*****

**This is for Heartonsleeve :) ****If anyone else has requests leave a review. I'm up for ideas. I'm toying with the idea of Rin getting fever when she was still following him around and I want to write the scene that's mentioned in all my stories where Rin rides on Sesshomaru's back in his true form with Kohaku when they were children in the field that would become their home when she is older.**

Hisato leaned against a one of the Orchard trees with his arms folded. He shook his head. She was at it again. This time she was tearing apart the Healer's hut. Rin's eyes were bloodshot and she was screaming hysterically. Yuki and Harutoga were nearby cowering in a corner. Yuki was trying to get her mother's attention but with each slash of the green whip extending to tear apart another piece of the wooden hut, Rin's blood curdling cries filled the afternoon air. Hisato considered letting her continue, she had every right to but appearances were everything. They had all but avoided the entire village knowing that she lost her memories for a month. Shippo covered for Rin during that time. The villagers were none the wiser, not even when she killed the Healer. The Fox demons hid the battle.

It was whispered that he found a post somewhere else. Only the inner circle of Sesshomaru's house knew the truth, the spell he cast and the child they lost. Hisato was certain that neither Sesshomaru or Rin were aware that a month later they were both still suffering. Sesshomaru hovered and Rin's emotions were unstable. When she was like this none could calm her but Sesshomaru. Hisato wondered how long it would take them to both acknowledge how much the loss of their child effected them. Where they used to be more affectionate Hisato had watched the slow unraveling of their relationship. Even before the Healer, the fights were more frequent. The guard was forced to watch from a corner with his eyes downcast or remain on the other side of a door and pretend like he didn't hear what was on the other side of the door.

Now, Rin still woke with nightmares, no longer about Sesshomaru but about the Healer taking her memories. There were mornings she woke up terrified if she was alone that everything was the way it had been. If he and whichever maid that was on duty that day were lucky they could calm Rin themselves. If not he would send Jaken or one of the children to retrieve Sesshomaru. Only their bond calmed her these days. They were both clueless.

But saying so, wasn't part of his job as a guard. His sole purpose was to guard Rin and if he failed again, he was certain that he would end up dead. But this, what she was doing right now, was too much. Rin wasn't even dressed, she was still in a Yukata, her hair wild and frizzy, with her two children next to her yelling at her to stop. Her yukata was loosely tied. It was slipping around her waist. She wasn't even aware of how immodest she was.

This wasn't good. Rin already had an audience. Hisato _tsked_ and walked forward, he took out one of his own swords, he would need it to block hers. She may have been human but that sword of hers was deadly. Rin was out of control again. Next to Hisato was Hideyoshi a white haired Inu-Yokai. The only thing they had in common was the faint scent of humanity that pumped through their veins. Hideyoshi had a human grandfather many generations before preventing his line from ever becoming full-blooded.

"Go get Sesshomaru-sama," Hisato ordered him. "I can already tell she won't calm for me."

"He's in meetings with the wolf-demons. It's the last one before we set out this evening. He isn't going to like the interruption," Hideyoshi answered softly. "You go, I'll make sure she doesn't destroy anything beyond the hut."

Hisato frowned, perhaps it would have been better to tell the villagers the truth. Perhaps it would have been better to keep Rin in the house. These outbursts were getting more frequent. Hisato knew from experience they were both becoming too reliant on their bond. This would be one of those time Sesshomaru would have to engage the bond to calm her.

"Great now the house is on fire," Yuki folded her arms next to Hisato, "do you plan on doing something about this?" And then there was the eight year old Queen of the house, who thought she had just as much authority as her father.

Hisato pursed his lips, "come, you can help me get your father out of the meeting with Koga-sama." Hisato bent over and Yuki climbed onto his back. The only thing she liked more than causing him trouble was causing her father trouble. Interrupting was right up her alley and she wasn't likely to be strangled or killed for it. "Harutoga, come!" Hisato ordered the little boy. Harutoga at least was a peaceful boy. He had a soft temperament, but great power. The guard saw it from the day the boy was born. He would rival even their uncle Inuyasha one day.

Hisato flew into the air, he touched his own heart. He didn't get to see her often. The last time was five years ago, but he knew she was there. These two needed an intervention badly. He landed in front of the public entrance of the home. The children dropped off his back and ran ahead of him.

To his surprise Sesshomaru was in the public dining room with Koga and several wolf demons.

"Ka-san is out of control again," Yuki blurted out in front of everyone. All eyes including Sesshomaru's turned to her, "oops." She averted her gaze.

Hisato walked over to Sesshomaru. Jaken jumped in front of him. Hisato dreamed of taking Nintojo and frying the toad with it. "He isn't to be disturbed."

"She won't be calmed," Hisato spoke the words to Jaken but they were loud enough for Sesshomaru to hear.

Hisato watched as Sesshomaru closed his eyes, he placed his hand over his heart, then furrowed his eyebrows. "Dammit she's resisting me. If you'll excuse me for a moment," Sesshomaru spoke to Koga.

Koga inclined his head, "woman troubles?"

If looks could kill, someone should have told the wolf leader not to speak about Rin like that.

"Where is she?" Sesshomaru's voice was low. Hisato wanted to ask if he really needed to know? Besides her scent Sesshomaru should now be able to sense her location. There was so much about their bond that Sesshomaru was still unaware of. _I suppose it's time we teach them eh, dear one? _He thought to himself.

"Destroying the Healer's house. You should take something for her to wear," Hisato's voice was as low as Sesshomaru's.

Sesshomaru's eyes widened. A second later he was gone.

* * *

Again this was one of those moments Hisato was supposed to pretend like he didn't see what was going on. Sesshomaru held Rin in the boughs of a magnolia tree. The villagers were putting out what was left of the burning hut. Hisato walked cautiously towards them with the kimono and sash. He left the children with Atsuko at the manor.

Rin's face was buried in Sesshomaru's neck. For a yokai who was as powerful as Sesshomaru, his demeanor towards his lover was the complete opposite of his reputation. But that was also something Hisato had to pretend he didn't notice. Sesshomaru ran his claws through her hair. Hisato faintly heard, "he was there," that was Rin's ginger voice.

Hisato couldn't blame Sesshomaru for taking a human, especially not that human. Rin was beautiful, strong, powerful and perhaps the only person that could scold Sesshomaru and not die for it, besides his mother who rarely visited. And when Rin saw Sesshomaru, Hisato knew wasn't aware of the scent that came off her. It was intoxicating to all the sentinels that guarded the house and any guest who had a heightened sense of smell. It was the most sensuous flavor he had hardly smelled on a woman.

"It was a dream," Sesshomaru's pitch was so tender it was almost disturbing. Hisato could feel the rise in yoki. As predicted Sesshomaru had to engage his bond to Rin to calm her again. This was happening more and more often. He hovered and she clung to him. Hisato had no idea how they were going to travel like this. Sesshomaru was going to take Rin and the children with him. He said it would take two months to re-solidify his borders and recover from the debacle the Healer caused.

The guard left the Kimono at the base of the tree. Sesshomaru glanced at him long enough to acknowledge his presence. Then the black haired demon walked several lengths away and took up his post. He did his best to ignore what he heard coming from the boughs of the tree. "It didn't feel like a dream."

"You killed him my heart. He can't hurt you anymore."

"It still hurts."

"I know."

Then there was the day in the grove that Hisato had to pretend like he didn't see them both doubled over crying. The miscarriage affected the entire house, not just the two love birds alone. Someone was able to infiltrate Sesshomaru's home, the powerful Dai-yokai, perhaps one of the strongest demons of the age, and came very close to stealing his mate right out from underneath him. For the world, he was still a powerful force to be reckoned with, for the inner circle he was cracking.

Hisato felt a whoosh of air next to him, "Sato," he acknowledged his twin brother. Sato had long black hair and wrist stripes similar to his brother. They weren't identical, but were similar enough it wasn't easy to tell them apart. All of the sentinels had human ancestors, none of them could transform, none of them could heal human injuries.

"There is a disturbance at the barrier," Sato scratched his black beard.

"I'll go. You stay here," Hisato was about to fly into the air, when he noticed Sesshomaru's eye come out of Rin's neck.

"She's come," Sesshomaru jumped out of the tree. "Hisato, take Rin back to the house," Sesshomaru blocked Hisato's view as he helped Rin get into her kimono. "I'll come shortly." There it was again that tender almost sickeningly sweet voice that was reserved just for Rin.

"Yes, Sesshomaru-sama," Hisato walked up to Rin, "do you want to walk?"

"No."

"Fly then?"

"No," her voice was flat and monotone.

"What's left?"

"Train, let's go on the other side of the lake."

"He said to take you home," Hisato argued. This woman would be the death of him yet. If he didn't listen to her he would face consequences, if he didn't listen to Sesshomaru-sama there would be consequences. He knuckled his forehead, "for an hour and that's it."

Hisato followed Rin as she went to the clearing on the other side of the lake. They were near the border of the village where the barrier began now. Rin slid her arms through the slits at the shoulders of her kimono and tucked the loose sleeves into her sash. She hefted up the sides of the kimono. Hisato couldn't help but admire her muscular legs. "Have you finished preparing to leave?" Hisato asked her.

"Just take your swords out," Rin was not the same young woman Hisato used to guard. Not anymore. He met her when she was eighteen and Yuki was just a baby. He guarded them from a distance until their home was finished and then it was his job to ensure their safety.

Hisato removed both his blades. Rin was good but if Hisato fought with full force she would be dead within minutes. He slashed at her knees, she blocked. He used his other sword to go for her neck she ducked. The battle ensued. The dead look in Rin's eyes was replaced by a fire. It did Hisato's heart good to see that, at least some part of the old Rin was there. She was like a spider, he slashed at her arm, she blocked, and released the serpentine whip. He smacked it off with his hand singing his fingers. She released it at his neck, he held up one of his swords and slapped it away. A moment later he spun and drove his other sword into Rin's shoulder, "shit," he cussed. It cut just below her shoulder on her left arm.

"I'm fine," she bent over her arm holding the bleeding wound with her other arm.

"No, that's deep," sometimes even Hisato forgot his own strength. He ripped a piece of his shirt to tie onto it, "he's going to be here any minute."

"It's fine," Rin stood up.

"Oh dear," came an effeminate voice from behind Hisato, "you really should be more careful."

Rin's entire arm was covered in blood.

Hisato's hid a smile, "Gobodo-sama, so you were the disturbance?"

The female Inu strutted over to Rin, "let me see." She lifted the damaged appendage up to her eyes, inspecting it. "Well, he's not going to like this."

"What are you doing? Stop," Rin tried to pull from Gobodo-sama's grip.

"Silence," Gobodo-sama hissed, "and stop fighting me."

The guard felt the familiar rise of the demoness's yoki. It made the hair on his skin rise with the power she held.

"How can you?" Rin's face was full of confusion, "it hurts, stop."

Gobodo-sama waved her off, "I can access your bond because he is my son, although somewhat uncomfortably for you and me and not without consequences."

Rin's arm stopped bleeding, Hisato watched as the cut slowly healed.

"Consequences?" Rin asked.

Sesshomaru was in his true form in the clearing roaring at his mother not a moment after she said that, "consequences," Gobodo-sama pointed at Sesshomaru, "oh do calm down, I didn't hurt her," she lifted the layers of her kimono as she spoke walking around both Rin and the guard.

Sesshomaru's red eyes stared fiercely at his mother. In a flash she matched him in her true form.

Rin looked at Hisato and then at Sesshomaru's mother, "why would she care if I got hurt?" Rin grabbed Hisato's arm.

"Probably didn't want her son to feel pain for you," Hisato answered quickly while turning to watch the stare down between the two large white dogs.

"He would have healed me himself, but he would have gone after you for hurting me," sudden realization ran across Rin's eyes, "you two? Really? For how long!"

"I bonded her a century ago," Hisato chuckled to himself, "why do you think she recommended me?"

Rin started laughing. "What are they doing? They're just staring at each other."

"They're doing more than that. He felt the intrusion to his bond to you. After what happened with the healer, he's practically screaming at her to never touch your bond again. She's not saying much, just brushing it off as natural."

"She can access it because she is his mother?"

"Something like that and because she is as powerful as she is. But he is more sensitive to it now after," Hisato chose not to finish the sentence.

"The healer," Rin finished for him. "Why couldn't he sense the intrusion when the healer put the spell on me?"

"Arrogance. He spent his entire life believing he would never bond a woman. 900 years of stubbornness isn't erased overnight. He thought his father was a fool for bonding Izayoi and dying. He swore he would never be so stupid and then he met you. The only problem is that he never allowed either his mother or father to explain Inu-yokai bonds to him. He only now has some idea how powerful it can be, even if it's not reciprocated in your case."

Both mother and son were in human form now. "Why are you here mother?" Sesshomaru snarled at her.

Gobodo-sama walked over to Hisato and squeezed his hand, she placed a soft peck on his cheek, "I was summoned."

Sudden knowing hit Sesshomaru's eyes, "you bonded my mother?"

Hisato flicked his eyebrows up and shrugged his shoulders.

"Oh don't be a fool Sesshomaru, I bonded him and after some convincing, some very good convincing," she toyed with Hisato's ear, "he reciprocated. But that was a hundred years ago. It took you this long to figure it out?"

"He's younger than me," Sesshomaru glared.

Rin tried to stifle her laughter.

"Only by a few hundred years. And how many centuries younger than you is your human? Did I say anything when you took her as your lover? What was she twelve when you bonded her?"

"Seventeen," Rin interjected.

"Silence, I was merely healing your lover to avoid you lashing out at mine," she nuzzled Hisato's neck.

"Why did you summon my mother?" Sesshomaru turned his eyes on Hisato, "and what did you do to Rin?"

"It's nothing," Rin ran over to Sesshomaru trying to salvage the situation, "we were sparring and my arm was cut. She was just healing it."

"He summoned me because you two are acting out of sorts and if it doesn't stop you are going to end up just like your father!" Gobodo-sama yelled at Sesshomaru. "You are too dependent on that bond and she is weak!" She pointed an accusing finger at Rin.

Hisato knew those weren't the right words, but it did need to stop.

"Because you turned your back on father?"

"Oh please Sesshomaru not that again," Gobodo-sama rolled her eyes, "did you think your father and I were bonded? I had an itch and he scratched it. In fact he scratched it so well you were conceived can you really be so angry? Did you think we were in love?"

Hisato took Rin by the wrist, "we should probably leave now." Hisato was stopped by a death grip on his shoulder.

"Don't touch her," Sesshomaru's voice was low, carnal, his eyes red.

"Oh dear it really is as bad as you said. What happened here dear one?" She looked at Hisato.

Hisato looked at his lover then at Sesshomaru and couldn't decide whose warning glare to respond to. "I think it would be better if you two spoke alone. Rin and I will sit by the lake where you can see her Sesshomaru-sama."

"Release his shoulder Sesshomaru," Gobodo-sama's hand was on top of Sesshomaru's.

Sesshomaru looked from Hisato to his mother and then back at Rin. "By the lake," Sesshomaru released Hisato.

When they were further away, Rin turned to watch the interaction between Sesshomaru and his mother. "Ok…what's going on? You sent for her?"

"What you two are doing isn't healthy. It's not how the bond is meant to work. May I speak plainly?"

"Always," Rin laughed, "at least with me."

"You know my great-grandmother was human, she was also bonded to a great Dai-yokai. That's why I can fly. If your children bond full blooded yokai like their father it's possible the children born will be able to salvage some of the skills they will lose by having human blood. My great-grandmother and great grandfather were deeply in love with each other. But one day, when she was expecting my great uncle, she was attacked by a powerful demon. The blow wasn't fatal to her, it was to the child she was carrying. They were never the same afterwards. He hovered and she clung to him. Eventually they shunned everyone around them, and she became a liability to him. They were both killed by a dragon, my grandfather was just a boy at the time barely older than Harutoga and he had to raise himself in a world where Hanyou's were not accepted. Do you know how took him in?"

Rin shook her head.

He pointed at Gobodo-sama.

"Her? I thought she hated humans and half-breeds!"

"She does, in her own right. She finds them weak and useless. She likes you because of your fighting spirit and because you brought out her son's real strength. Grandfather bonded a pure blooded inu-yokai, and likewise the two children he bore, meaning I am mostly made up of pure blood. I can't transform, my blood and saliva can't heal humans. Rin-sama, you don't want to do the same thing for your children. I know your heart is broken right now, but it's only temporary. It will heal if you let it."

Rin folded her knees up to her chest. "Have you ever lost a child?"

"No, but she has, before Sesshomaru-sama and it wasn't a miscarriage. The child was killed when she was away. She left her daughter with servants. When she returned the child was murdered. After that she became cold and calculating, not unlike Sesshomaru."

"He had a sister?"

"She's telling him now," Hisato nodded in their direction.

"Were you there when I was a child at her palace?"

"I saw you from a distance. I was sure then that he would bond you when you became of age."

"How did you know?"

"It was obvious to those that are onlookers. She asked Jaken over and over, what Sesshomaru's relationship to you was. She saw it as I did and anyone watching. The connection was there, you just needed to mature."

Rin took a deep breath, "I don't know how to stop. Unless I can feel him it's like my heart doesn't stop hurting. It doesn't stop racing, my hands shake. I can't sleep if he isn't in bed next to me. It's not just losing a child, the Healer stole my memories. He locked me in my own mind. I was there the whole time trying to break out and I couldn't. I wasn't strong enough unless his yoki was with me. How do I stop needing him so much?"

"Mourn," Hisato scratched the bottom of his shoe, "mourn deeply. Let the tears stop on their own. He's right, you killed the Healer. He's gone. He can't hurt you again."

"What if someone else does the same thing?"

"They won't be able to now."

"What do you mean?"

"Inu-yokai bonds are also protective. Your bond wasn't strong enough then to stop the spell, it is now. Now that he knows how to wield it, he will sense any intrusion and know to come. You saw how quickly he came when his mother used it to heal you, and I will not make the same mistake and leave your side again Rin-sama. Mourn your child, mourn deeply, for your sake and his, this can't continue. You have two live children to think of and this village where so many like me have found a place where they matter. You have to move on."

She bit her lip.

Hisato put a tentative hand on her shoulder, "stop holding back, let the tears come. And if he cries again he'll be the better for it."

"You saw that?" Her voice was thick with tears.

Hisato nodded, "I see much and I say little. It's not my job to speak as I have done now."

"Thank you," Rin hugged Hisato.

"I wouldn't do that," he removed her from his embrace, "go hug your angry lover, who looks like he wants to kill me."

Rin ran to Sesshomaru. Before she could reach Sesshomaru, Gobodo-sama had Rin by the arm, and pulled on the back of her Kimono revealing the long scar down her neck, the puncture wounds on her shoulder and the slash that ran the length of her right shoulder down to her waist, "you really are a beast Sesshomaru, this is how you make children?"

Rin flushed.

Sesshomaru pulled his mother's arms off of Rin. "That is private."

"You know you could try again without hurting her, but that would involve talking to your mother about what is private." Gobodo-sama practically glided to Hisato planting an even more passion filled kiss on his mouth, "well…I think I got through to him. You?"

"I can only hope." Hisato responded.

"A serrow demon? I haven't seen one of those in centuries. She must really have strength if one tried to take her from him. Think we can get a few minutes alone?" She tickled Hisato's ear.

"Not in public," he pushed her hand down.

"But I have an itch," she licked his ear.

"Your son is watching."

"Maybe we'll teach him a thing or two," Gobodo-sama chuckled. "Would you like to watch Sesshomaru? Perhaps I can teach your human about pleasuring males. Come my love, those bushes look inviting."

Sesshomaru's eyes widened, Rin's mouth was on the ground.

Hisato smiled and led his soulmate away from watching eyes, "he may fire me."

"Let him, more time for me," she giggled as she pulled him to the forest floor.


	21. Kagome's Attraction

**AHHH OK...I hope everyone laughs as much as I did. I got a few requests I will try to write them as I can. **

**Kagome's Attraction**

Kagome sat next to the lake by Rin's village. Summer was nearing its end. She would begin nursing school in the fall. As promised Sesshomaru showed Kagome the storeroom with gold, silver and piles of Edo Era currency. She asked him where he had obtained such wealth. He replied that he made a habit of recovering money from bandits he killed. Ever since they attacked Rin in the village when she was fifteen and again when he became intimately involved with her, he no longer ignored their actions when he found them. He killed them in droves and took their spoils. Kagome attempted to lecture Sesshomaru about returning the items to their owners, "ridiculous," was his answer before he walked away adjuring her to take as much as she needed. Kagome was able to pay for nursing school with some left over.

She watched her children playing in the lake. Taisho and Sota were laughing and swimming in the middle while Izayoi and Mayumi were splashing near where the water's edge met the smooth rocks. Near them, Harutoga who was still learning to swim and Yuki were also swimming. Kagome noted the similarities between Izayoi and Yuki. They had the same white hair, same moon's on their foreheads. Izayoi lacked the stripes on her face that Yuki had.

"What are they wearing?" Rin sat down next to Kagome, "is that something from your time?"

"They're called bathing suits. They're less heavy than swimming with a short kimono on, I brought one for you. It's a two piece," Kagome reached into her bag and pulled out a red two piece bikini for Rin.

"It looks like underwear," Rin blushed taking them, "people wear these in public?"

"Why not, I have one on underneath this," she fingered the fabric of her soft yellow kimono. Kagome's legs were upraised flashing her white skin. "Besides, I bet Sesshomaru would love to see you with this on."

"He'd like it more off," Rin laughed, "you don't know him very well."

"Do tell," Kagome turned to Rin, "does he always go around without a shirt on?"

Rin shrugged, "it depends. At home, especially at night yes. Not when there are guests though. Then he dresses with all due decorum," Rin rolled her eyes, "as is fitting a yokai Lord. Why?" Rin nudged Kagome, "it's pleasant to look at isn't it?"

"Does he work out?" Kagome asked.

"Work out?" Rin looked confused.

"You know like, lift weights? I guess you wouldn't have those. Run laps? Do things to make his muscles look like that?" Kagome wondered.

"Of course not," came a sultry voice from behind them, "Rin dear what is that?" Gobodo-sama walked up behind them.

"Gobodo-sama," Rin bowed her head, "it's a what did you call it?"

"Bikini," Kagome replied.

"Not very modest is it?" Gobodo-sama lifted it up, "oh you must wear it for him, actually…" she leaned over, "I came to see Hisato, may I?"

Rin chuckled, "sure."

"Soba-sama!" Yuki waved from the water.

"Soba bachan!" Harutoga came leaping out of the water running at his grandmother. He jumped into the air and landed in her arms. He hugged her neck, "you're back soon!"

"So this is?" Kagome pointed at Gobodo-sama.

"Sesshomaru's mother," the demoness said. "My goodness you are powerful aren't you?" Gobodo-sama touched Kagome's cheek.

Kagome's skin crawled. If she understood what she was sensing the female Inu-yokai in front of her was more powerful than her son.

"So you're the one that bonded Toga's hanyou and those would be your less than hanyou children?" She motioned out to the children playing, "the ones with dark hair, did you conceive them during the new moon?"

"How does she?" Kagome's mouth was on the floor.

"She just does," Rin replied.

"That explains why Sesshomaru had to help them find their yoki, they aren't very strong are they?" Gobodo-sama set Harutoga down, "not like you Harutoga, you will rival even your Ojisan one day. As to why your…do you use the human term husband? Inu…whatever his name was, doesn't have quite the physique my son does that has to do with how much yoki flows through their veins. Oh I know he's here, I'll show you, you two!" She yelled at white haired Hideyoshi and black haired Sato, "come here, take your haori's off, oh and dear one? I know you are here somewhere, you as well. Don't worry what did you say your name was?"

"Kagome and what are you doing?"

"Showing you the differences. See Sato over there? He has a minimal amount of human blood, oh there you are," she grabbed Hisato and kissed him, "look at this?" She held up the bikini, "I think we can find some use for it."

Hisato laughed from deep in his chest.

"And Hideyoshi, also has minimal amount of human blood, less than Hisato and Sato. Dear one take your shirt off," she tickled his chest.

"I don't think this is the time for that," Hisato argued.

"Rin-sama?" Sato asked Rin.

"I guess you might as well learn, off with them," Rin stood up.

Sato, Hideyoshi and Hisato removed their armor, their swords and their haoris.

Kagome's brown eyes widened, "wow," she mouthed as she took in the form of each one of the sentinels. They were well defined, more than Inuyasha, less than Sesshomaru. Sato had maroon stripes on his shoulders, Hideyoshi had lightening stripes over the top of his chest. "Do those stripes go all the way down?" She looked at Hisato. He had two magenta stripes that started at his navel and disappeared beneath his grey Hikama.

"Down to his-" Gobodo-sama started.

"What is going on?" Came a deep tenor from behind Rin.

Rin and Kagome turned to see Sesshomaru with an entertained look on his face and arms folded.

"Kagome simply wanted to know why you are more well-formed than your hanyou brother," Gobodo-sama answered, "take your haori off Sesshomaru."

Sesshomaru gazed at Kagome who was bright red and pursed his lips in an attempt to keep from laughing. "If you wanted to see Miko, you should ask," it was an effort for once to keep a straight face.

"Why is everyone half naked?" Inuyasha walked up behind Sesshomaru, "Kagome why are you staring."

"My goodness," Kagome looked at Sesshomaru's well defined abs, the scattering of muscles along his lats and the ravine between his pecs. "Rin you are one lucky woman."

"So this is Toga's hanyou," Gobodo-sama walked forward, "you too, take it off."

"I will not," Inuyasha folded his arms.

"Oh come on Inuyasha," Kagome held his hand.

"I won't ask again," Gobodo-sama's voice took on a devilish foreboding tone.

"I wouldn't push her Inuyasha," Rin waltzed over to Sesshomaru, she ran one finger down the bumps in his stomach, "she's stronger than," she was stopped by Sesshomaru pulling her into an embrace and thoroughly kissing her.

Before Inuyasha could react, Gobodo-sama had him by the neck and slammed him against a tree. He attempted to draw Tetsusaiga. Gobodo-sama slapped it out of his hand, turned him around pinned one of his arms behind his back.

"Don't make her ask again Inuyasha-sama," Hisato chuckled.

Sesshomaru raised his eyebrow at Hisato making it clear he was sniffing the air.

"What do you think I smell every time she walks into the room?" Hisato muttered under his breath, "or hear outside your door at night?"

Rin flushed a deep shade of red and turned her face into Sesshomaru's chest.

Sesshomaru gave a warning glare to Hisato, "not another word," he growled.

"Come to me, Tetsusaiga," Inuyasha held his hand out.

"Down Tetsusaiga, good sword," Gobodo-sama shot her glance at the katana. It dropped at her command.

"What the?" Inuyasha's eyes widened.

"Toga is the father of my child, the owner of the fang, which means we are connected, and my cousin, and what is connected to me I control, now, remove your shirt before I do it for you," Gobodo-sama tightened her hold on Inuyasha's neck.

He begrudgingly removed his red haori and inner layer. "Now, it's time your…what do you two call each other? I see you're bonded although weakly, I wouldn't expect more out of a hanyou."

"Wife," Inuyasha supplied.

"Such a shallow term," Gobodo-sama arched her eyebrows.

"Yeah, what do you call Rin, Sesshomaru?" Inuyasha yelled to his brother.

"My heart," he whispered in Rin's ear, kissing above it as he did.

Inuyasha rolled his eyes, "that's an organ."

"Silence, now…pay attention, what did you say your name was Miko?" Gobodo-sama still held Inuyasha by the arm.

"Kagome," Kagome responded still blushing a deep shade of red, "wow…so you're saying Sesshomaru has a better body because he is pure blooded?"

"You think my brother has a better body?" Inuyasha yelled.

"Shit," Kagome tried to cover herself, "well I mean…he has more lines."

"Silence!" Gobodo-sama yelled, "now pay attention. This is a hanyou body, you see, he is still toned. He has lines on either side of his stomach and down the middle, but he's missing the middle lines and the ones on the sides," she pushed against Inuyasha's stomach, "and this is well…firm, but not nearly as solid as my son's. Now come, let's look at these three. For a yokai it's easy to sense and smell that Hideyoshi, Sato and Hisato have human blood, but if a human were to look at them, they look no different than pure bloods. You can tell the difference because the location of the markings on their torsos. Sesshomaru turn around."

Sesshomaru turned around.

"Male pure blooded torso markings are on their back. Like the two that run across Sesshomaru's back just above his mokomoko. Human blood is on the front, and in the case of hanyous, most of the time, there is no markings. My grandchildren are exceptions," she swooned, "they have their father's powerful blood in them."

"Then how do Izayoi and Sota have moon's on their foreheads?" Kagome crossed her arms annoyed.

"That's what you named them? My goodness…the blood of Inu No Taisho is powerful and it was the will of their father. Why so defensive Miko?" Gobodo-sama inquired, "moving on, now these three have varying degrees of human blood, so you see they have the side lines, the middle and the crossing lines."

"You mean a six pack?" Kagome interjected.

"A what?" Sesshomaru looked at her.

"We call it a six pack, ripped, toned, can I really touch them?" Kagome ran over to Hideyoshi.

"Is this really necessary Sesshomaru-sama?" Hideyoshi asked.

"Yes," Sesshomaru replied.

"You're evil," Rin whispered into his ear, "you're just trying to make Inuyasha jealous."

Sesshomaru shrugged his shoulders, "perhaps."

"I'm not jealous," Inuyasha folded his arms, "I could do more what did you call those things?"

"Sit ups," Kagome said, "holy cow," she ran her hands along Hideyoshi's stomach, "it's so firm." She moved on to Sato and Hisato, "wow." She stopped short at Sesshomaru.

"Feel free Miko," Sesshomaru gave Rin a gentle push aside and held his arms out?

"His stomach feels like rocks," Rin told her.

"Have you ever ran your tongue along them?" Gobodo-sama asked.

"Gobodo-sama!" Rin stomped her foot, "that's private!"

"You know Inu-yokai males are very sensory sensitive," she folded her arms.

Kagome ran her hand along Sesshomaru's stomach. Sesshomaru forced himself not to smile, especially when he saw how frustrated Inuyasha was.

"Okay, I think you've learned enough," Inuyasha grabbed Kagome's hand.

"Holy cow," Kagome said again.

"Yep," Rin ran her hand down Sesshomaru's rippled abs, "you all can get dressed now. Gobodo-sama, why then does Harutoga have the black streak down his ear and into his hair while the rest is white?"

"Because my son loves you. It was his desire that the child have some of your attributes," Gobodo-sama smiled, "now, dear one, oh do keep your shirt off, shall I try on this what did you call it?"

"Bikini!" Kagome huffed at her.

Sesshomaru glanced at Hisato then his mother, then back at Rin, "she brought it for me."

"You didn't want to wear it?" Sesshomaru looked disappointed at Rin.

"Come here," Rin began mouthing something inaudible into Sesshomaru's ears. Sesshomaru shuffled his feet, and cleared his throat, then grabbed Rin around the waist and disappeared into the air.

"I think I just learned a lot about Inu-Yokai," Kagome sat down on her towel.

Inuyasha sat down next to her, "and flirted with my brother."

"No I didn't," Kagome replied defensively. "I flirted with all of them…oh come on! Inuyasha, I'm over thirty and about to start nursing school with a bunch of kids, my kids age! Why can't I have some fun before I go back? I still love only you," she leaned over and kissed his lips, "and you should see what I'm wearing under this."

"Nothing?"

"Next to," she laughed as Inuyasha grabbed her and carried her off into the forest.

**Guests: **

Lumping all three together. I will write a chapter answering about whether or not Harutoga and Yuki have human days. I would assume yes, because all the hanyous in the manga did and I don't want to deviate too badly from it. There were three you saw have them, Inuyasha, Jeninji and the one bull dude that I can't remember his name.

To the guest that asked for Kagome and Inuyasha hope this made you happy. Not quite what you asked but what was inspired.

Marnika! We shall see what they have, I have considered twins but considering what I am going to do to them in the sequel...eeeeek


	22. Why Rin Was Unhappy

**Why Rin was Unhappy**

"Make sure you behave you two," Kagome ruffled Sota's white hair and hugged him. She was grateful that Sesshomaru and Rin said they would look after her boys. She and Inuyasha were staying just long enough to say good bye before Sesshomaru and Rin left the safety of the barrier and began re-establishing the borders that he created. "Taisho," she called her black haired child, "you can always come with us."

Taisho shook his head, "I want to stay here, I don't want to live on the other side, it's too hard to pretend to be something I'm not, I'm not human, I'm not yokai, and this is the only place where it makes sense."

"By Ni-san!" Izayoi hugged her brother stifling back tears.

"I feel like I'm committing child abandonment," Kagome scratched her head and hugged Taisho close to her.

"_Child abandonment? _Miko, I think you make these things up," Sesshomaru walked up from behind her. He pat Izayoi and Mayumi on their heads, "keep practicing," he told Mayumi who was still getting the hang of throwing both hijin tesou and sankan tesou.

Kagome's eyes rolled into the back of her head, "honestly…I have to explain everything to you. In my time, children stay with their parents until they are eighteen."

"Why?" Rin and Sesshomaru asked at the same time, "are they incapable?" Rin added.

"Because that's the law," Kagome informed them, "but I know this is what is best for them."

"So what do they do until they are eighteen? Is that when they get married?" Rin gave Kagome a hug, "I'm going to miss you."

"No, they go to school, and then they go to college, like I'm going to…and then they get married when they are in their twenties," Kagome explained.

Sesshomaru snorted in disapproval.

"And you were how many hundreds of years old before you and Rin were bonded?" Inuyasha laughed. "Sheesh, oyaji was 800 years old when he had you, 1,500 when he had me…okay that's not helping the argument."

Rin and Kagome laughed to themselves holding hands, "you could always stay here too." Rin told her.

Kagome shook her head, "there is so much I can bring back if I just learn the basics. This two years will be good for me. I'm so tired of seeing people die from things that are easy to cure in my time with medicine. And my brother is going to help me figure out how to do more with Jinenji's herbs. But you remember what I told you, don't overdo it. Make sure you rest when you are tired, the panic will go away in time and so will the pain of the loss."

Rin nodded blushing somewhat, it was embarrassing to admit that she felt so out of sorts lately.

"_Panic?_" Sesshomaru pulled Rin to his chest, "what does this mean?"

"You two should probably go talk," Kagome shooed them with her hand.

Rin took Sesshomaru's hand walked with them back into their home, down the long corridor, in their room and into the garden. She sat down by the Sakura tree, her eyes on the red camellia by their hot springs. She pat the ground next to her. Sesshomaru sat with Rin, he put an arm around her shoulders, "panic?"

"My heart feels like it's racing sometimes, I can't calm it. I was feeling it whenever you had to use the bond to calm me…I asked Kagome what it was, my hands shake, I feel dizzy," she chewed on the nail of her thumb. "She said it would go away in time."

Sesshomaru listened to her words. He felt another stab of guilt hit him. In the past, his presence alone had comforted her. Of all the times she was kidnapped as a child because of him, threatened, she had never suffered effects as she did now before. "Rin…why," getting the words out were awkward, almost painful, "why do I not comfort you anymore?"

Rin looked at the sky. The sun was setting, they needed to leave soon. "It was different this time. In the past, it was scary, but it was just kidnapping, threats, words, this time I was there inside my own head. I knew who it was, but I couldn't tell you. I saw you but I couldn't stop my fear from the nightmares. I felt like I was trapped behind that barrier in my head, screaming at the top of my lungs for you to find me, and you did, eventually. But then I woke up, and the baby was gone, it was a month later. I know I'm safe with you," she kissed the inside of his neck, "just give me time."

"Why were you so unhappy?"

"I guess every mother goes through it, Kagome-sama told me that it happens to all mothers. Before I could travel, I could fight, I could do what I wanted when I wanted. Now I have to make sure they're safe and if you haven't noticed Yuki is not an easy child. I feel like living here, in this place, it gave us what we wanted, a safe place for our children to grow up but their heaven is my prison," she folded her knees against her chin. "I love being here when you're home and I miss being free. And they will be child-like until I die."

"You crave adventure?" Sesshomaru nuzzled her neck.

"Yes, like before. I could fight next to everyone, slay demons. Now I have a house to care for, a very large and imposing house, and you are like a king and I have to remember all of the ridiculous rules of decorum that exist in the yokai world. I just want to be me again and I want to have more time with you. And that barrier keeps out the yokai that would harm us, which is half the fun."

Sesshomaru stroked her back, "you will fight by my side as we travel. I am bringing Hisato and Hideyoshi to guard you and the children. They will be safe. You can train Taisho and Sota, their form is sloppy and impulsive like their father. Will that help your happiness?"

"I think so," Rin leaned against Sesshomaru, "so will more time like this," she wrapped her arms around his waist.

"We must leave, come," he pulled her into his chest and disappeared into the white light landing back in front of their house. Akari was loading a yawning Harutoga and Yuki onto Aun. Hisato and Hideyoshi stood close to the scaled dragon.

Jaken stood next to the two guards staff in hand. Even was excited to finally be leaving the confines of their home. "We go," Sesshomaru announced. As he did, he took Rin's hand in his own, "they will be child-like for years to come, but they won't be helpless. Their minds are like human children' their age, but when they are fifty or sixty years old, they will have the minds of adults in the forms of children. They will know enough to survive on their own, even without this Sesshomaru if necessary."

"And I'll be old and grey and you will still look like a twenty year old," Rin squeezed his arm.

He shrugged his shoulders, "it can't be helped."

"I guess it can't. Will you still love me when my hair is as silver as your own?"

"Yes," he answered quickly.

"And when I am wrinkled and grey and can't get out of bed?"

"I don't look forward to those days, but yes."

"Will you stay with me until the end?"

"You're morbid," Yuki loped up behind them, "and mushy, it's gross."

"One day Yuki, you will fall in love-" Rin attempted to speak.

"No I won't," she folded her arms, "and if I do it's not going to be a human."

Rin laughed out loud as they walked through the forest towards the southern border. Ogres were massing in large numbers. Koga had already taken his wolves that direction to hold them off until Sesshomaru came. Rin glanced back at Aun, Harutoga slept on his back, stomach down drooling over the side of the saddle. Jaken led Aun through the forest. Followed by Hisato and Hideyoshi. Akari rode with Harutoga.

Sesshomaru squeezed Rin's hand and whispered, "until the end."

**Orifice:** _Peace would be nice wouldn't it? I love the responses I am getting for my sequel idea. Yours actually reminds me of me, when I watch the Star Wars movies because I get the point of the Prequels but I would have been happy stopping at Return of the Jedi because then the force would have been balanced and the empire was in shambles...can't things just balance themselves out? Anyway, I love your long rant and you are right she is going to suffer, but if you think about it, she suffered in the anime. I did not read the manga, but in the anime she was kidnapped a total of 5 times. I'm sure half the reason Sesshomaru left her behind was to protect her, but he also couldn't let go of that relationship. _

_I feel the need to defend Sesshomaru based off your review. So first off I do not believe for a moment that he would ever just fall for Rin without some internal struggle. The struggle has to be there, because the central point of his character in the anime was that he hated Inuyasha for being responsible for his father's death and for being a hanyou. Sesshomaru's Heart, is a play on words because he finally admits that Rin is the reason he is capable of feeling. The only problem with the ending is that neither one of them thought through their actions before she was pregnant and expecting their child. They were living as if nothing would ever happen until Touma came along. The headlong follow your instinct pursuit is what got them in hot water in the first place. Which is also why Sesshomaru created the home for Rin and the children. Unlike other father's of hanyou you see on the anime, he actually spends time and lives with his human. Toga didn't, Jinenji's father did not, and neither did the father dai-yokai bat demon of the little girl who helped Inuyasha get the red Tetsusaiga._

_In terms of spending time with his children, perhaps it was too subtle the way it was written but if you notice in Lost Memories, he is forced to take on more of a care giving role, even though he kind of sucks at it. He dresses them in the morning, trains/plays with them. Eats breakfast with them. His training, really consists of playing hide and seek, if you notice the way its' written, the children have to find him using their sense of smell. For Sesshomaru he would never admit he was "playing" with his children but that is what he was doing. Then it shows that he spends each evening by the sakura tree with the children cuddling against his legs. Very out of character for him, but he understood they were scared and felt the need to care for them. Which was something he jokingly criticized Rin for in the beginning of Lost Memories. Also whenever they approach him he never turns them away. From a child's perspective, when I wrote for Yuki she felt like he had abandoned them, but she didn't see or appreciate all the other things he was trying to do while saving Rin's memories._

_His training with Yuki and her back, was done more out of compassion at seeing his daughter in pain. He called it training, but his harsh exterior would never allow him to admit seeing her in pain affected him. He used it as an opportunity to help her heal herself. And watching your children play is a big thing for parents. He was watching Yuki with pride because as a hanyou she was outsmarting pure blooded wolf demons._

_And yes, he does push at times for sex but what man doesn't? Or woman for that matter...I'm totally guilty of tackling my husband and encouraging him to get into the mood. In that particular chapter he isn't pressuring her for sex, he is pressuring her to move on from mourning the lost child by having another one. If they were a normal human couple it would be only a matter of months before she would be expecting again and although they wouldn't forget the lost child the new one would help them move on. He was pushing her to conceive a child not to have sex. Which is why he says he would not force her to do it. _

_The one thing I see as a constant on FF is that Rin is a simpering girl who admires her lord and never really gets her own personality and her own strengths. The other thing is that they never experience real life scenarios. Imagine it like someone who is married to a doctor, lawyer or Police officer. Personally I am married to an accountant and let me tell you, six months out of the year, I am on my own. I want my characters to have authentic experiences, not ones where she is just swooning because he is hot. _

_Instinct I feel is going to give me closure for many of the things that have floated around in my head. Like it or not he is a dai-yokai, he's not even just a run of the mill demon, he is the most powerful demon in the series and she is human and that kind of relationship cannot go without consequences. And the one thing I am excited to explore in Instinct is that it isn't everything. Natsuki is going to face serious consequences for her choice to approach Sesshomaru before given permission and Gobodo-sama has her own reasons for seeking out Natsuki. _

_One quote I'm toying with from Sesshy's mom is this, "you will pay the price for your choice Natsuki. Had you waited, you would have thought he was simply cold and unfeeling as his reputation, you would not have known he was capable of a love like this. And now you must live with that choice." _

_And..._

_"Sometimes it's better to act against Instinct." _

**Agree with me when I play their story out in my head this is how it goes. Choices have consequences and not everything goes as planned. Please review!**


	23. Sneak Peek: Instinct

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter. I'm going crazy writing this summer...okay this is a *****sneak peak**** into my idea for a sequel. I will not publish anymore chapters to follow the sneak peak it will be it's own story. That doesn't mean I won't be adding more drabbles, but I wanted to post this for the lovely guest that asked if I thought I was done writing for these characters. I thought I was until this idea popped into my head. It will be a while before I can get more of the story going. **

**A few notes about this: This is takes place in Autumn after Lost Memories. I was trying to do two things by writing the portions that include Sess and Rin, one is to capture their love for each other. At this point they have been intimately involved for roughly 10 years. They are still reeling from the miscarriage in Lost Memories and we finally see them heal as they do it brings them closer together. I set it up in the last drabble that now two of Inuyasha and Kagome's children are with them. And goodness I need to focus on school...I'm going to be so excited to start my last year of college in the fall but so bummed my new schedule will make it almost impossible to write.**

**And if you didn't read Sesshomaru's Fear, one character in here might strike as you whaaaaa?**

**Story Title: Instinct**

**Autumn**

Gobodo-sama sat in her high backed golden chair with her arms crossed over her ample breast. Her silver hair was tied back into two tight pony tails, decorated with sea shells she couldn't remember which potential suitor had given her as a young woman. She toyed with the skin on her cheek, flicking the purple lightening stripe annoyed as she listened to Kensaku speak to her about his daughter Natsuki. She rolled her eyes and snorted, "fine bring her to me," she snarled in agreement. Kensaku had been extolling the many virtues of his fine daughter to her for hours now. That was the life of one who would live forever, conversations didn't have to be clipped or cut short, they could take hours.

"Natsuki," Kensaku called to the young girl that waited down the steps.

Natsuki boldly walked forward. The gait of her stride caught Gobodo-sama's attention. She didn't cower as Gobodo-sama regarded her. In human terms she didn't look more than fourteen or fifteen years of age. In yokai years the girl was over three hundred years old not quite old enough for what Kensaku was proposing but it wasn't unheard of for someone her age to find their soulmate. Natsuki was by no means dressed plainly. She wore her own mokomoko draped over her shoulders. She wore several layers of fine silk with the outer one being a deep maroon with dragons lining the edges. Gobodo-sama stood up, she walked over to the girl and grabbed her by the chin. She regarded the girls golden eyes, all Inu-yokai had golden eyes, there were few variations. Natsuki had the same magenta stripes under her eyes and on her wrists. Natsuki's hair was silver similar to her own. Gobodo-sama turned Natsuki's head one way then the other. She slapped Natsuki's hand away when she tried to push Gobodo-sama away, "stop that," Gobodo-sama hissed. "She'll do."

"So you agree?" Kensaku stood up.

"I agree to nothing, it is up to instinct to decide. She is still young, and he is already bound to one." She left out the one he was bonded to was a human and that he had already fathered two hanyou children. That would come on its own, something the two of them would have to sort out and if Gobodo-sama had her way this pairing would not happen for another century.

"But you agree the connection is there?" Kensaku pushed.

Natsuki smiled. For centuries she had heard about Sesshomaru-sama. His glory, his power and that she was meant to be his mate. From what she had heard he was one of the most powerful inu-yokai of the age and with their combined lineage she would become the mother to the greatest Dai yokai of the next age.

"It's there, but she will not approach him this century. There's no rush Natsuki is still young," Gobodo-sama gave them a warning glare.

"It's not unheard of to be bound to more than one, surely you know that," Kensaku pressed.

Gobodo-sama stood up, extending her full height, she allowed the slightest tinge of red to overtake the whites of her eyes, "you will not disturb my son's family in this way, not now. The earliest this pairing will take place is in fifty years, perhaps sixty, I will send for Natsuki then, now leave my home." The air filled with her yoki, choking both Natsuki and her father, causing them to cower in fear. Natsuki would learn quickly once she was bound to her son the seriousness of the bond. It would make her pine for him, yearn to be in his presence, to crave his touch and his closeness and knowing Sesshomaru as long as Rin lived he would be unable to reciprocate.

Kensaku she knew saw it as an opening to power. Gobodo-sama was sure he believed that meant that Natsuki's children would inherit the territory that Sesshomaru had made for himself. Kensaku would be in for a surprise, this was a conversation that Sesshomaru and Gobodo-sama had already made, the territory would go either to Yuki or Harutoga. But little did her son know she was already planning his next mate. In another half century Rin would age and wither away. Then she would call Natsuki and whether Sesshomaru would liked it or not, his instinct would force him to bond to Natsuki and he would soon become the father of the next strongest Dai-yokai.

As Natsuki walked out of Gobodo-sama's castle she heard a soft whisper. "Hey," then a hand reached out and grabbed her own. She pulled hers from the grasp and hissed at the offending party who had dared to touch her pure skin. "How do you really feel about not seeing your intended now?" This man was tall, with silver hair that was tied into a high pony tail. He had a moon on his forehead and halberd tied to his back. He face was scarred on one side where his eye was grey. His clothes were plain and white covered in silver armor.

"I can wait. Fifty or sixty years isn't long, although I'm not sure why there must be a wait," she replied coolly.

"Because your intended is bound to a human and has already fathered two hanyou children and plans to have another," the man was antagonistic. He pranced forward flipping his pony tail over his shoulder, "what a disgrace it is, to see one of such stature lower himself over and over with a human."

Natsuki folded her arms over her breasts, "and what would you suggest? I'm not yet 400, and Gobodo-sama is not one to be crossed." Natsuki detested humans. Her mind was now racing, her father had promised that her children would inherit the territory in the middle of Japan that Sesshomaru claimed as his own, but if he already had children, would he choose his hanyous over a pure-blooded child?

"At the rate at which his human wants children, he'll father a whole litter of Hanyous and by the time he meets you, your children will have nothing left of his territory," he picked at his claws.

"That won't do at all," Natsuki's eyes flamed red.

"Would you like to know where to find him? He travels often but in five months' time I know where he will be," the man laughed and walked forward. "Just think if you happen to be in the same place, his instinct won't allow him to resist you, you merely need to touch his heart with your hand, and his soul will be yours."

"And how does that deal with his human mate?" Natsuki's voice was as cold as the man speaking to her.

"You don't know humans very well do you? If he bonds you and she finds out, she will leave him. Humans are fickle like that, wanting to keep their men to themselves and not share them. She won't accept you into their home and she won't accept his actions with you," the grin that spread across the Inu-yokai's face accentuated the fangs in his mouth.

"Who are you?" Natsuki asked.

"Touma. Sesshomaru's younger brother," he spun around to leave. _This will be even better than killing his mate and their unborn child, when she is done with them, his family will be destroyed. _"Believe me when I say that I love my brother and I want what is best for him. Consider it Natsuki, come to me in five months and I will tell you where he will be."

Natsuki lifted the hem of her kimono to catch up to her father. Touma's words played in her head. Something had to be done, she wouldn't wait another sixty years. Not when Sesshomaru was already fathering children with a human. Her father promised that her child would be the one to inherit the land and gain the title. She would take Touma up on his offer, in a matter of months Sesshomaru would be hers.

Rin blocked Taisho's attack with his sword. True to their word, Sesshomaru and Rin allowed Taisho and Sota to travel with them. Rin taught Taisho and Sota the sword, while Sesshomaru spent an hour each evening teaching them to control and focus what little yoki they had. The lessons were taught alongside Yuki and Harutoga's, catching the two boys up to where Sesshomaru's children were. Rin struck again lunging for his stomach then twirling to slash at Taisho's neck. She released the whip to wrap around his feet, "move your feet, Taisho," she threw the whip at him again. It wrapped around his neck and threw the black haired boy to the ground. "You have to learn to move your feet faster, back and forth, never stay in one place. Get up, we'll go back to hand to hand for now."

Taisho wore just light blue hikama. His tanned chest glistened with sweat. He bent over to take a drink from his water bottle. Next to them, Sota sparred against Hisato. Hisato slapped aside hijin tesou easily and threw his own blades at Sota. Sota had to duck, jump and twist in the air to miss them. "Like that Taisho," Rin pointed at Sota.

"He'll always be better than me, his yoki is stronger than mine," Taisho complained. At thirteen he was as tall as Rin. His hair was still as black as ever just like his mother's with deep brown eyes. Taisho looked like pictures of Kagome's brother Sota that she had shown Rin before.

Rin chuckled, "come on, I'm completely human, I have no yoki inside of me."

"That's not entirely true Rin-sama," Hisato's voice was clipped with exertion. He threw his own attack at Sota. He dodged blades again and threw his whip at Sota's feet, trapping them. Sota fell to the ground with a thud hitting his chin on the ground.

"Yes, but what is inside of me I can't use," she threw a kick at Taisho. He blocked it with his hands. She spun and aimed for his head he ducked. She threw punch after punch at his stomach. Taisho blocked each one. "I have learned," she kicked at his face, "to fight on my own," she spun on the ground to trip Taisho. "So stop whining," she grabbed Taisho by the back of one arm. He turned his hand on her and released his yellow poison against her skin. Rin hissed in pain. Her skin blistered. She doubled over in pain, "a fraction of his and it still feels like my arm was just put in a fire."

Hisato raised a hand to Sota to stop their lesson. He stalked in fury over to Rin giving Taisho a frustrated look. He inspected Rin's wrist, "he isn't going to be happy when he sees that."

Rin smiled, "it gives me a chance to interrupt his meeting," her face twisted into a girlish grin, "next time I say sparring Taisho I mean without your yokai tricks. You'll be lucky if Ojisama doesn't make you cry tonight for this." She held up her burnt arm.

Taisho swallowed hard, his eyes wide in fear. His fists clenched by his sides.

"Go play you two, I hear the kids laughing in the field. Koga has a few children your age," Rin pointed to the trees. There was a handful of wolf demon children. She knew four of them belonged to Koga, the rest belonged to other clan members. Somewhere she was sure Yuki and Harutoga were playing as well. She heard one child counting and could see the rest scattering to hiding places. Rin breathed a sigh of relief to see Sesshomaru sitting in the field with his silver hair blowing in the wind. He wore his traditional garb. It had been forever since she saw him dressed in the white hikama with the matching white top with red down the sleeves.

Rin watched as Sota walked immediately up to a young wolf demoness. Sota lowered his neck slightly and gave the red haired girl a peck on her cheek. Sota took the girl by the hand and led her into the forest. Rin's mouth fell, she turned to Hisato, "how long has that been going on?"

"Three weeks," Hisato chuckled, "you didn't notice before now?"

"No, I think I need to speak to Sesshomaru."

"Why?" Hisato slung his swords back into their sheathes on his back.

"It's not modest, what are they doing in there? Did she bond him? Inuyasha is going to kill us!" Rin rubbed her forehead, "although he is fifteen, almost sixteen, I suppose he is of the age."

"I don't see the signs of it yet I think, but you would have to talk to Koga-sama about what wolf demons do and of course Gobodo-sama," Hisato walked behind Rin as she headed towards Sesshomaru.

"Why her?"

"He still has Inu-yokai blood in them even if he is mostly human. There could be negative effects for any children born from such a union, if that is what they are doing."

"Go spy on them!" Rin pushed Hisato's shoulder, "Kagome and Inuyasha left them with us to train them, not mate them off to wolf demons!"

"I will not," Hisato stopped a distance from Sesshomaru, "you can go on by yourself."

Rin cradled her arm as she trudged up behind Sesshomaru. It went from a burning feeling to intense stinging. Her skin looked like it was bubbling with thick yellow pus. _Only a fraction of Sesshomaru's and look what it did to my skin. _Rin had to hold back tears.

The afternoon sun was warm and refreshing. The air was tepid with a breeze that blew her short sleeveless kimono in the wind. "My Lord," she said seductively.

Sesshomaru turned with a half grin on his face. His golden eyes glinted in the sunlight at Rin, "my Lady," he held out his hand to her.

"Am I allowed to approach you now?" Rin had yet to get used to the rules outside the home. When guests came to their home, she knew she was meant to demur to his wishes in public. She was supposed to smile and speak diplomatically as much as she could. She was good with the wives but often stumbled over decorum with the men. Especially the male yokai who felt it was their obligation to test her strength. Travelling she had learned she could not interrupt his meetings. The children and entourage as she called them camped away from Sesshomaru's main tent. In fact before she traveled with him he never had a tent. They brought with them Akari who was more than happy to spend two months away from her husband and children. The hanyou fire cat was more than happy to throw her children at her husband for some adventure. Rin was guarded by Hisato, her black haired Inu yokai guard and Hideyoshi, who had the same silver hair as Sesshomaru, but stood shorter and was far less powerful. The whole family encamped together in one tent and when Sesshomaru wanted Rin to himself he took her deep into the forest away from prying eyes. The rules seemed different in public like this.

Sesshomaru had given her an entire lecture on how she represented not just Sesshomaru but their land as well. That meant that she had to look presentable daily. The children had to be dressed in their best and only when Rin was training her nephews could she wear her plainer shorter kimonos. She found the fancier kimono's cumbersome and the routine with Akari braiding and twisting her hair exhausting. Sesshomaru encouraged her to train them for all to see, it showed her strength and made her look like less of a target.

"We have taken a recess, the ogres have amassed several miles from here, sit with me," he took her by the wrist.

Rin recoiled in pain, pulling her blistered wrist away. She held it to her chest and sat down next to Sesshomaru.

Sesshomaru's expression changed to concern. He pulled the wrist out of its hiding place, "compliments of Taisho?" He asked Rin.

Rin nodded. She pressed her head into Sesshomaru's mokomoko. He wore his armor making curling into him uncomfortable. "I came to see if my yokai lover would heal it. It really hurts."

"I thought you liked your battle scars?" He held her wrist gently in his hand rolling it over to inspect the extent of the damage. The stripes on his wrists brought the tinge of the singed purple skin.

"Not when they are from shoki, and blister and sting, please my love?" Her voice almost broke at the end, "it really stings."

Sesshomaru closed his eyes as he pressed his lips against the blistered skin. Rin winced in pain as his lips touched her skin. She could feel his yoki entering her body through their bond. She watched in wonder as the skin changed from a deep blistered purple, to red, to orange, then back to its natural tan color as if the burn had never been there. "Mmh," she snuggled as close as his armor would allow, "am I allowed to hug you in public?"

Sesshomaru gave a low growl. In a moment Rin was staring at the clear morning sky, while Sesshomaru settled between her legs. He adjusted her hips with his own clawed hands running them up her smooth bare legs and gripping her buttocks. His golden-eyes stared down at her like she was a morsel of food. He let his neck dip and licked her lips before kissing her deeply. He held her by the back of the neck and continued running his mouth along hers until she was out of breath. "We're in public," Rin scolded him.

He hitched her thighs around his hips. He rolled his hips into her thighs, he kissed her neck and stopped short of opening her kimono and exposing her breasts to the morning air. "So?"

"Is this some yokai thing?" Rin tried to wriggle out of his grasp. "The children are watching," she pushed on his chest.

"Yes," he pulled Rin back down by the back of her legs, "it lets them know that you are mine," he raised his eyebrows. "The children are playing hide and seek," he motioned towards the clearing. "Yuki is causing a stir," his face creased into a proud smile at the mention of his daughter.

"Get off," Rin pushed on Sesshomaru's chest, "you're armor is digging in to my stomach, ah!" Rin gasped as his tongue dipped between her breasts. Her back arched involuntarily into his face. Rin shivered at the warmth. Sesshomaru's hand ran under Rin's kimono and up her side. Rin looked over to see one of Koga's children trotting towards them. "One of Koga's children is coming, get off me."

Begrudgingly Sesshomaru rolled off Rin into a sitting position. He pulled Rin to his side and kissed the top of her head. "You're blushing," he commented as he pulled twigs and leaves out of Rin's hair.

Rin struggled to make herself look less disheveled and retie her obi without completely opening her kimono. "You are evil."

"Yokai," Sesshomaru reminded her flashing his eyes red long enough to make Rin laugh.

The little boy finally reached them. He was dressed in dark brown furs similar to his father's. They wrapped up his legs to his knees. The fur covered the boy from his legs up to his shoulders. A small face with dark brown hair and tiny fangs stuck out from a hood. His skin was the same dark brown as his father's. His visage was thoroughly frustrated. "Sesshomaru-sama! We can't find Yuki, she's been hiding for an hour now!"

Rin watched as Sesshomaru stifled a laugh. In public he was as he had always been, stoic, composed, emotionless, but she could see the emotions he hid flit across his eyes. He was proud of Yuki, only being half demon meant that she was a disadvantage and she was still beating the other children at the game. "Keep looking," Sesshomaru instructed the child. His eyes gazed into the trees in the clearing.

The child huffed frustrated and ran back.

"Do you know where she is?" Rin scanned the trees and the bushes. She knew Yuki wore a white short kimono that day. She brushed her hair from her face and tried to compose herself.

"Look high in the trees, she's masking her scent and her yoki, the middle of the clearing," he placed a hand on Rin's left shoulder. She winced in pain, "again?" He rolled his eyes.

Rin looked back at him, "again," she answered ruefully. "The weather must changing again, mmmh," she leaned into the claws running circles over her left shoulder. Rin looked high in the trees in the middle of the clearing. She could see the slightest bit of white in the trees. The children would have to climb to find her. To the corner Harutoga giggled and held his stomach. "I think Haru knows where she is."

"I wonder," he said as he pulled the side of her kimono to expose the bare skin of her left shoulder. He traced the scar that ran the length of her shoulder down to her lower back with his finger. His mind flashed to their lost child for a moment. The scar was a constant reminder of what they had lost. He closed his eyes, he let his lips rest over the scar and focused on the ache inside Rin's shoulder.

"That feels nice," Rin felt his warmth spreading across her shoulder easing the pain. "Ow, stop," she felt something pinch in her shoulder like the bones wanted to rearrange themselves. The yoki pulled back out of her shoulder.

Sesshomaru furrowed his brow, he sighed, "it won't heal. I think you broke it all those years ago," He touched both her shoulders rubbing them firmly.

"The pain is less, you did something," she leaned back into his chest, "we haven't had time together like this since we started travelling."

She waited for him to say something. Sesshomaru's eyes were on the field watching the children play happily.

"You've been quiet since your mother visited," she rest her head against his neck. "Sesshomaru?"

"Mmh?" He stroked her hair.

"You've been quiet since your mother visited last," she repeated herself. "Are we okay?"

He nodded kissing the side of her neck. "The child would have come any day now," Sesshomaru muttered next to her ear.

"I know," she held his hand, she felt the pain of the loss coming again.

"It's time we try again," Sesshomaru informed her, "tonight."

Rin spun around, "no." She backed away from him tripping on her own feet.

Her scent spiked in fear. Sesshomaru grabbed her wrists, "I won't harm you this time," he pulled her back against his mokomoko, "Rin," she continued to struggle against his grip, "it's time we moved on, mother is right."

Rin's eyes stung, she shook her head. "I'm not ready." She was on her knees resisting Sesshomaru's grip.

"We try again tonight. Stop struggling against me, this you are not allowed to do in public," he forcefully pulled Rin back to his chest again, "stop." He crossed Rin's arms over her chest and placed tender kisses along her neck. Her body was rigid against his.

"I'm not ready," she whimpered against him, "what if I can't? What if I lose another baby? What if-?" She was caught off guard by a sensuous kiss and his warm tongue invading her mouth. She caressed the stripes on his cheeks and gave into the kiss. A soft moan escaped her lips.

Sesshomaru held her face and caressed both her cheeks, "my heart."

"I hate this," she touched his heart.

"No," he said firmly. He would no longer protect her from her own emotions with their bond. His mother was right the more he allowed himself to feel and allowed her to feel the more the pain subsided. "You gave birth to two healthy children, you were given an herb to make you miscarry, you were kicked in the stomach. It wasn't your fault," Sesshomaru stroked her hair, "we try again tonight."

"Just like that?" Rin tried to push her tears back.

"Yes," Sesshomaru answered, "stop stifling your tears," he wiped her eyes. "Rest against me and let yourself cry."

"Your armor is uncomfortable," Rin whispered attempting to swallow the lump in her throat.

He untied his yellow obi and set his swords next to legs. Sesshomaru reached to his side and unclipped his black armor. He pulled it off and set it next to him. "Come," he pulled Rin to his chest. As he did he opened his haori for her to rest against his skin. "Your skin is cold," he wrapped his arms around her bare shoulders.

Rin teared against his chest, "I'm not ready."

"Yes you are," Sesshomaru stroked her hair. He kissed the top of her head.

"Take me home tonight then," Rin demanded, "take me to our hot springs and our sakura tree. Where our other children were conceived?" She wiped her tears.

Sesshomaru lifted her hand to his mouth as Koga walked up to them. "It's time to start again," Koga informed Sesshomaru.

Sesshomaru inclined his head, "I'll be there shortly."

"Take your time, I could use more time with Ayame," he stalked towards his mate.

"Do you want me to let an ogre past for you?" Sesshomaru's chest vibrated with laughter.

"Four," Rin answered quickly glad that he changed the topic of their conversation. She curled closer into his chest, pulling her feet up to her chest.

Sesshomaru pulled her away from his chest by the shoulders, "four?" He regarded her curiously.

"One for me, one for Sota, and one for Taisho," Rin grinned at Sesshomaru.

"And the fourth?"

"Yuki and Hisato, I think he's getting bored with nothing to beat up. Perhaps he should train against you," Rin held Sesshomaru tighter, "your skin is so comforting." She pressed her nose into the line of his pecs. She nipped at his skin attempting to leave a mark on him.

"Yuki will enjoy that," Sesshomaru gazed across the high yellow grasses. The children were still hunting for Yuki. He gave Rin a nip on her shoulder in response to hers.

"Ouch," she batted at his face, "you have fangs." She reminded him.

"You started it," Sesshomaru nudged her shoulder. He stood up and closed his haori. Rin untied his obi enough to tuck his white haori back into his hikama. The motion made Sesshomaru aroused. She let her hands linger for a moment in the front of his hikama. Sesshomaru held her chin, "I love you. Do you know how deep my love is?"

"Give me your arm," she was lost in his eyes, her voice low and sensuous. Rin slid the spiked part of his armor up his left sleeve and slowly clasped the armor on the right side under his mokomoko. She took his yellow obi and retied it outside his armor. Rin slid his swords back into his belt. She touched his heart with her hand. She closed her eyes focusing on her love for Sesshomaru. She felt his yoki brush against it. The energies intertwined, dancing together. She breathed in deeply, "I love you too," she hugged him. "They still can't find Yuki."

He rest his head against her forehead and held her hands, "I must go now. I'll let your ogres through, we finish the plan now, we attack in two hours," he caressed her bottom lip, "do not get injured."

Rin smiled, "I won't. Do you really need their help?"

"No," Sesshomaru pulled Rin back to him. He hid his smile against her neck, "Bakusaiga would clear them in one swipe. They need the help of this Sesshomaru. You will lay with this Sesshomaru tonight," he circled his claw around her stomach, "I will take you home when the battle is done."

Rin held the hand against her stomach, "now I'm nervous. I won't be able to travel with you anymore."

"No, but I will not leave you for so long again, I will spend more time at home, and when our child comes," he spoke as if she was already pregnant, "I will spend a month at home with you."

"A whole month, with my memories intact? Sesshomaru?" She refused to release his hand.

"I really must go," he closed the gap between them, "what is it Rin?"

"I'm lucky to have you as mine," Rin whispered into his ear, "I love you," tears stained her cheeks again.

"I am the lucky one," he bent his neck to kiss her, he held her chin, he felt his stomach tighten. He nuzzled Rin's nose with his own, "I love you. Be prepared."

Rin waited for Sesshomaru to turn around before she ran and jumped on his back. She wrapped her legs around the back of his armor. He laughed and fell over with her. Rin tried to roll him onto his back only to end up on her back with Sesshomaru holding both of her arms over her head, he lowered his head and nuzzled Rin's nose. Rin giggled and returned the nuzzle holding onto his neck. He gave her a quick kiss and stood back up to walk towards the planning area.

Rain was pouring down on them. Rin buried her face into Sesshomaru's neck as they flew towards their home. They left the children with Akari and Hisato. After the battle Yuki was exhausted, Sota and Taisho were practically passing out. Sesshomaru stayed long enough for Rin to instruct her maidservant to put Harutoga and Yuki in bed after a bath before Sesshomaru hooked a hand around Rin's waist and flew into the air to carry her back to their home. He meant what he said, he wanted her to have another child. Just as he flew into the air, the night sky covered with clouds and a storm began. The water beat at his clothes quickly soaking both of them. He had to wrap Rin inside his mokomoko to keep her from slipping through his soaked fingers. Rin smelled of apprehension and nerves. When he landed, Sesshomaru purposely landed in their garden next to the red camellias. As predicted Rin bent down and touched the earth. She was dressed in a clean short kimono. The light turquoise accentuated her legs. Her hair fell in pools around her waist as the rain created a puddle under her feet.

Sesshomaru knelt down next to Rin, his own silver hair swirling in the dirt beneath them, he took Rin by the elbow and pulled her gently, speaking over the thunder and lightning, "come, my heart."

The look Rin gave him was of heartbreak, "please, Sesshomaru, I'm not ready."

"Come with this Sesshomaru," he tugged on her elbow again. He brought her into their home. He immediately divested himself of his katanas and his armor. He placed them near the door to dry. He threw off his wet clothes. He gazed over his shoulder at Rin who undressed at a much slower, reluctant pace. He gave his long hair a bit of a shake to get the wetness out, then pulled out a long grey silk kimono. He put it on, tying a black obi around his waist.

Sesshomaru walked up behind Rin and helped her remove her soaked clothing. He reached around her stomach and pulled her against his chest, "we'll have a bath first," he kissed her shoulder as he untied her yellow obi. It was the same one he had given her so long ago, "this needs to be replaced."

"No," Rin took it from him. The purple was frayed around the edges and the yellow was stained with dirt and mud. She touched his cheek as his lips brushed against her collar bone, "please," Rin's voice was thick with tears, "I don't want to do this."

Sesshomaru removed her turquoise kimono and threw it in the hallway. Even when they were gone there was staff there to care for the house. He had sent Jaken ahead earlier in the day to prepare their room with clean sheets and remove the bedding from the garden before it was soaked in the rain. Sesshomaru breathed against Rin's neck as he untied her underwear and let it fall to the ground. He removed a yukata for her, it was light pink and slightly see through, one of his favorites. It allowed him to see the curve of her hips and the peak of her breasts, "put this on," he helped her step inside and tied the matching obi low on her waist. "Come with me," he held her hand and led her to their private bath house that was across the hall from their room.

The bath was often only used by Yuki and Harutoga. Even in the winter Sesshomaru and Rin spent time in their hot springs. With it raining it wouldn't be comfortable for either one of them. Sesshomaru was glad to see Jaken had already filled and heated the water to a warm temperature. Sesshomaru touched the water, and looked back at Rin. Her eyes were brimming with tears. He untied her yukata, and held her hand as she entered the water. The bath was a large square, with a ledge for them to sit on. She went to the back of the bath where the soaps were and started washing her hair. Sesshomaru removed his grey kimono, hung it on the wall and followed in after Rin. He pulled her next to his side, "let me do that," he kissed the crook of her neck and massaged the soap into her hair.

She leaned into the strong fingers that massaged her temples. The circling motion of his digits made goosebumps form on her shoulders. She sighed in peace allowing him to wash the dirt from her hair. When he finished he took the luffa from the shelf and lathered it in a sweet smelling soap made from the petals of the sakura tree. He rubbed it against Rin's shoulders, over her back, and then lathered her breasts. His breath catching with the motion, "stand up," his voice was sensuous and thick with lust.

Rin trembled as she did. "Sesshomaru?"

"Quiet," he stood up with her. He kissed her mouth, pushing his tongue into her cavern, licking the roof of her mouth as he ran the soap over her stomach, down the small of her back and then lifted one of her legs up to wash the dirt off. He repeated the motion with the other until Rin was clean and then sat down, pulling her against his bare chest. He took a cup, filled it with the warm water and poured it over Rin's shoulders until the soap was rinsed, leaving her tanned skin slick. He pulled Rin back over his lap until the crown of her head was in the water. He ran his claws through her hair rinsing the soap. When he finished he pulled Rin back into his lap and held her against his chest, arms wrapped around her small firm waist. He sighed into her ear, "I smell sorrow, fear, anxiety and arousal," he pressed his mouth into Rin's neck. "We can't mourn the child forever."

"You could," Rin's voice came out as a whisper. She sniffed, "you'll live long after I am dead, you'll find another to have more children with."

Sesshomaru nuzzled her nose, "it is you that I want to make children with."

"I'm so scared," Rin wrapped her arms around his shoulders. He returned the embrace, "I feel like I failed last time, like I failed you, I failed the child I couldn't protect. How was he able to take my mind so easily?"

"If anyone failed it was this Sesshomaru," he stroked her wet hair, "I should have not left you for so long, so frequently to make you feel so lonely and unworthy. Rin look at me," he pulled her face back, "it wasn't your fault."

"It wasn't yours," she couldn't get her voice to raise above a whisper.

"It's time to move on," Sesshomaru held her to him, "now it's your turn to wash this Sesshomaru."

Rin laughed through her tears. She took the soap she knew he liked, "how is this here? Did someone know we were coming?"

"Jaken," Sesshomaru bent his head back to make it easier for Rin to lather his scalp. He let out a sigh of his own that was a mixture between a low growl and a human sounding sigh, "you relax this Sesshomaru with your touches."

"What could you possibly feel tense about, this is easy for you, you're not the one that has to carry a child for months on end, and go through labor pains," her hands were stopped by Sesshomaru grabbing her wrists and holding them tightly.

"I am the one that has to control himself, so I don't hurt you while I plant my seed, the one that has to watch your stomach grow with my child and worry that my enemies will take advantage of our vulnerable time and be of no use to you, when you scream in pain as you bare my child," the words came out much faster than Rin had ever heard him speak before. "I do not like seeing you in pain."

"Then why are we doing this?"

"Because I know you wish for more children and you will regret not trying again," Sesshomaru released her hands. "And I want to see your confidence in yourself return."

"I thought Inu-Yokai don't create children so quickly?"

"In this we follow the human custom, mmmh," Sesshomaru's arms prickled in bumps as Rin rinsed the soap from his hair. She slowly poured the water over his crown while running her fingers down his long silver tresses.

"You aren't useless when I am in labor, you saved my life when Yuki was born," Rin took the luffa and put the plain smelling soap on it. She pushed Sesshomaru's hair over his shoulder and lathered his back in broad circles, "and I thought I had no energy left when Haru was born the labor lasted so long. The whole time from when the pains started I wanted you there with me, to hold me, just to hear your voice, and then there you were. You presence helped me have the strength to push him out. Your body next to mine afterwards, it felt complete Sesshomaru, it's one of my happiest memories," she laced her arms around his chest and licked the back of his neck. "Will you be with me this time?"

"If it's your wish," he held her hands, "you haven't finished," he turned around to face Rin.

"I know," Rin lathered the soap onto his chest. He stood up so Rin could wash his entire body. Her eyes tracked down, she blushed, the red covered her arms and over her abdomen. "H…how," her lips were locked against his. He took the luffa from her and threw it aside.

"I will know, our bond," he ran his mouth of her neck while circling her breasts with his hands, "will tell me."

"It won't cripple you again?" Rin pushed him back, "I couldn't bare if you died, again."

"It won't. I will know that you are experiencing pain. It will not become my pain as it did when the sword connected us. Now there is something I want from you," he motioned down with his eyes.

Rin tried to smile. The edges of her cheeks immediately went flat when she saw his eyes shade into a deep red, "you're supposed to wait until the end," she backed away from Sesshomaru. Memories from the last time they had done this were still fresh in her head, the only reason she didn't have scars to show for it over her whole body was because he used his blood to heal her.

Sesshomaru snarled and pulled Rin back to him, his breath was labored, "let me feel your love."

"My love?" Rin felt confused, his grip was almost painful.

He grit his teeth to maintain control, "your love," he placed her right hand over his heart, he lowered his head until his moon rest against her forehead, "your love," he repeated himself.

"Okay," Rin closed her eyes, she breathed deeply, and she focused her emotions on how much she loved Sesshomaru. She thought of how he held her between his legs and whispered in her ears as Harutoga was born. The way he refused to leave her when the women told him to, and how afterwards he held her in their bed for hours while she slept. She felt his yoki wrap around her emotions like a blanket, latching on to them, and heating them.

His breaths came out more evenly, "what are you thinking of?" Each breath was a sigh of relief. His hands held Rin by the elbows, he dipped his mouth into hers.

"Haru's birth," she gripped his arms above the elbows, "how happy I was you were there, even if I was in pain."

"I couldn't take your pain from you," Sesshomaru sounded sad.

"But you were with me," she echoed his tone.

He shook his head as if smelling something Rin couldn't see, "you're love is intoxicating." Sesshomaru could still smell fear on her, "Rin I am in control," he encouraged her, "I will not hurt you this time. Your love is soothing."

Rin nodded her head, "as is yours," she sniffled and pushed his hair back over his shoulders so she could kiss his chest. She nipped at his skin, around his pecs, across his chest. She kiss down the ripples of his stomach holding his sides until she was on her knees, eye level with his erection. She closed her mouth over the tip, and licked the bottom.

"Mmh," he rocked his hips into her mouth. He let his claws sink into her scalp enough to make her skin tingle.

Rin ran her tongue along the shaft, sucking on the sides, licking over the top until Sesshomaru pulled her back up, his body shaking.

He sat her on the edge of the bath in the corner her body no longer in the water. He lifted her legs up until they straddled the wall. He kissed the inside of her thigh, his teeth grazing along her skin. Her breaths came out in short pants the closer his mouth came to her center. He stopped and inhaled the scent of her womanhood letting her curls tickle his nose. In ecstasy he nuzzled her tender bundle of nerves with his nose before he opened her petals and sucked her clit into his mouth. He alternated between fast licks and open mouth kisses that pulled on her nerves.

"Mmm," Rin moaned, "Sesshomaru," she encouraged him, "yes, uh…"

She could feel him smiling against her sensitive parts as he continued. He pushed his fingers into her passage, stroking the top of her core until he found the place that pulled his name from her lips.

"Say my name," his primal side raged within him. He could feel her love wrapping around the winds that were blowing inside of him, but his need to be inside of her, to pound into her were still there.

"Sesshomaru, oh…" Her hips flexed against his fingers.

"Say it again," he sucked on her bud, only stopping to hear his name.

"Sesshomaru," she laced her fingers in his hair. She rocked her hips towards his tongue, and the fingers inside of her. She massaged the side of her head willing herself to come for him.

Low growls were coming from his throat, the hurricane was coming, it was whipping against his defenses. He desperately cleaved to the love and trust that was radiating from their bond, the hope, the desperate feeling of warmth that was his Rin. Her moans were getting louder. She slammed her hands against the wall of the bath, "oh!" She yelled, and then it was followed by shorter and more pleasure filled, deep throated groans as her hips reflexively rocked against his fingers. Sesshomaru kneeled on the sitting ledge.

"I'm scared," Rin whimpered as his member brushed against her sensitive folds.

"I know," he moved closer, gripping the sides of her stomach in his hands. "You know I would not force you to do this," he ran his hand down Rin's stomach.

"Sometimes, when I dream, I see myself holding the child we lost," Rin ran her hands along his arms, "I wake up…"

Sesshomaru rest his forehead against Rin's, he cupped her chin in his clawed hands, "let me give you another baby to fill your arms, to warm your heart."

"Take me to bed? Please?" She wanted to be closer to him, to feel him against her.

Red eyes met vulnerable brown ones. She held onto his shoulders, her head hung low on his chest. "Yes, my heart," his breathing was labored, he picked her up around the waist, closed his eyes for the briefest moment and turned into a sphere of white light. In a flash they were in their bedroom. "Go on all fours."

"What is it with you and this position?" She looked back at him arching her back seductively.

Her scent was overpowering his senses. "Inu-yokai, you're so wet," he touched the inside of her folds cupping her with one hand.

"Sesshomaru?" Rin had never seen him able to speak before when he was channeling his primal energy, "can…" she closed her eyes, instead of asking she rolled on to her back and inched up to her pillows. She rest her legs on either side of his hips as he kneeled between them, "make love to me like this? I want to see your eyes."

He stalked over her, lifting her hips to meet his. His hands gripped the pillows over around her head. He was stopped short by a burst of the most enchanting heated emotion flushing from Rin to him through their bond. So strong for a moment it overpowered the primal need for him to reproduce within Rin. The feeling of completeness, of his soulmate, caused a tear to leave his eye.

In time with the overpowering emotion Rin burst out, "I love you. I love you so much," she wrapped her arms around his chest. She touched Sesshomaru's cheek, watching his the emotions flit across his blood red eyes.

He lowered himself into Rin, pushing himself inside of her, he took her mouth in his, "I love you," thrust, "my heart," a second firm thrust, "become one with me," it was as if the bond was being formed a new, "one soul," he pushed into her, "our soul." He stopped, the feeling so overwhelming he was near losing control, "become one with me," his hips moved at a faster pace, pushing inside her over and over.

"My love," Rin held on as he continued moving inside of her. She lifted her hips to meet his, "oh, my love." She wrapped her legs around his hips. He slid deeper inside of her.

"Mmmh," it was so sweet it was almost painful as his seed fled inside of her, never feeling her love stronger for him in the nine and a half years they had been together than in that moment. He crumpled on top of Rin, struggling to find the words to return the intensity of her love.

She cried softly against his chest as he rolled off her. He pulled Rin to his chest, their legs intertwined, "I love you," she repeated touching his cheek.

"And I you," he held her as if his life depended on it.

Moments passed, the two in each other's arms. "What did you say to me? You said it the night you bonded to me too."

Sesshomaru paused, his mind went back to the words, _why are they so important? _That he not asked his mother. He had not told Rin, but he finally broke down and asked Gobodo-sama how to couple with Rin to create children without hurting her. His mother didn't fail to humiliate him and make a big deal about him finally asking her. He spent several hours having to listen to her talk about her and his father, then her and Hisato before she finally came down and told him, that Rin's love was powerful enough to calm him, if she could focus it in the moment. "I'm not sure, perhaps it's part of forming the bond between us." He rubbed Rin's back.

She buried her nose into his neck, "we're already bonded, why did you say it again?" Rin scoot her body closer to his.

"I felt something this time, something instinctive," he touched Rin's chin and kissed her lips, "something powerful," he closed his eyes focusing on the feeling, "as if the bond became deeper with this coupling," he laced his fingers around Rin's hand, "I can't describe it. Your love was stronger than the yoki of this Sesshomaru."

Rin smiled, "I really do love you, sometimes it overwhelms me, to feel so strongly for you."

"It was like heaven, something changed, the bond is different," he tried to explore the feeling, he couldn't understand what he was feeling. He was more aware of Rin than he had been before, more secure in their closeness. There was heat and comfort washing through the bond, trust and something else that didn't have a name.

Rin touched the scar over his heart with her hand, "let me feel it."

The feeling bled from him to her, warming her soul from the inside out. They embraced each other on the futon, arms circling waists, legs curled together, "I will never love another as I do you," Sesshomaru muttered in Rin's ears as they both drifted to sleep. His yoki was spent for the evening. Sesshomaru only rose from the futon when Rin shivered against him as the night air became cooler. He removed one of their warmer blankets from a nearing trunk and tugged it over her shoulders. He crawled back into bed with Rin, who instinctively snuggled into his chest. Sesshomaru shuttered his eyes and allowed sleep to come again.

**Leave a review if you know who Touma is. And I have yet to decide Boy or Girl for the new baby, if you have an opinion let me know.**

**If you have a drabble request, within reason I will write it :)**

**Guest:** Oh you make me blush supremely. I hope you liked this chapter as well.

**Therec3iver: **Thank you! I had fun writing in the medical stuff and him being like, "what?" It also involved figuring out when some of this stuff was invented. I've asked nurses before how they learn to place IV's. Most of the new medical protocol calls for IV's to be placed in the upper forearm below the elbow because the veins are larger and it's not as hard as in the arms. I have a chronic condition so I tend to be in and out of doctors offices, lots of time to ask questions.


	24. Rin's Sickness

**This is for the fan who asked about human times. I decided that it starts between the 8th and 9th birthday, at least for Yuki. Eventually Harutoga will experience it too. Thank you all for the reviews. Keep the requests coming! This excerpt will actually be a part of Instinct. I don't have enough of it written to start posting anything. **

The pregnancy wasn't without complications. By the time Rin was three months instead of the morning sickness lessening like it had with Yuki and Harutoga, it was so bad she couldn't get out of bed. Any movement caused her to gag. Hisato stood outside her door with his hand over his nose and his own stomach churning at the scent coming from the room. Atsuko busied herself trying to find soups that Rin could keep down, and teas that she wouldn't throw back up. Even Yuki and Harutoga avoided their parents room.

Sesshomaru landed lightly in the public entrance of their home. His face was stoic and emotionless as always. Inside he felt disappointment as he surveyed the entrance. Jaken came scurrying up to him, Nintojo in hand, "Sesshomaru-sama, welcome home!"

"Chichiue!" Harutoga came bounding up to his father. He pounced into his father's arms, bringing a half grin to Sesshomaru's mouth.

Yuki was absent for the first time. She had never missed his homecoming in the past. Sesshomaru glanced around. Akari was also missing, not that he cared but then who had been watching Harutoga? Hideyoshi leaned arms folded with one leg bent against the wall. The sentinel was a guardian not one of the trusted adults who were meant to watch his children. He glanced at the sky, it was clear, without a moon, "where is Kasan?" Sesshomaru asked Harutoga.

"In bed, she stinks," Harutoga waved his little hand next to his nose.

"She is agitated," Sesshomaru said half to himself. He could feel it through their bond. Rin was anxious and nauseated. "It hasn't subsided?" He looked at Jaken.

"It's worse. She hasn't been able to keep anything down in the last week. She has lost weight," Jaken walked with Sesshomaru towards the entrance, "she won't let anyone but Atsuko and Akari into the room. Akari that ungrateful hanyou. She didn't show up for work today, so poor Atsuko has been here all day. She's exhausted from cleaning up after Rin," they made it into the public dining room.

Sesshomaru could smell the scent of sickness coming already. The putrid smell of vomit. He set Harutoga down and handed the child a wrapped package.

Harutoga opened it excited, inside was a bag of sweet rice, "Thank you Chichiue!" He hugged his father's leg.

Sesshomaru continued into the corridor with Harutoga trailing along behind him, "Yuki won't come out of her room either," Harutoga informed his father, "she's been crying since the sun started setting. It stinks, why is Ka-san so sick?" Harutoga asked his father.

"She didn't tell you?" Sesshomaru stopped. They hadn't told the children yet. Rin wanted to wait until she was passed the stage where she had miscarried before. He stopped short next to Hisato.

Hisato breathed uncomfortably with his hand over his nose and his head down, "I'm sending for your mother, something is wrong."

Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow at him, "unnecessary, open the entrance down the hall," he instructed Hisato. He wanted to take a deep preparatory breath for what he would find inside the room, but the stench was overpowering his senses. It was sour, and raunchy. Harutoga followed behind him holding the material of Sesshomaru's leg. Sesshomaru knocked on the door. He opened it slightly, "my heart," he pushed the door open all the way.

Rin lay in a daze in their bed. Her purple lavender yukata was soaked in sweat. She shivered underneath her blankets. Her skin was deathly pale, a clean empty bucket rested inches from her head. The smallest mound protruded from her yukata. Her eyes opened slightly. She turned her neck, "Sesshomaru…son of Inu No Taisho," she whispered weakly. "I hate you," there was the slightest hint of humor in her voice.

"Ka-san, you're smelly," Harutoga got in bed with his mother, "why are you so sick?"

Sesshomaru opened the door to their garden and the windows. Rin curled tighter into a ball, "what are you doing? It's cold," she shivered.

Sesshomaru hoped his sleeve over his nose would clue her in. He pulled the covers off of Rin who protested against him. "Airing the room out," he answered her. He took out a warm red cotton blanket from the trunk and wrapped Rin inside of it.

"Don't move me," she protested as his arms wrapped her waist and hoisted her up, "I'm going to throw up on you."

"You've done it before," he replied quickly carrying her out into the foyer of their garden, "you need fresh air."

She wasn't lying. As soon as he moved her she started heaving. Sesshomaru stopped long enough to help her lean over. The vomit splattered on the foyer. Harutoga jumped out of the way still following them. It was mostly dry heaves with a watery substance. Sesshomaru frowned, "have you eaten?"

"I try," she whimpered, "why did I let you do this to me again?"

He sat with Rin under their sakura tree. The air was already cooler in the evenings. She shivered against him. He put her head against his chest and wrapped her into his mokomoko for warmth. "Is there something you can eat?"

Rin whispered frailly, "I was able to eat some deer meat the other day, and ginger root soup. I threw the soup up this morning though," she held onto his arm. She felt his lips brush against the side of her neck, "don't get any ideas." She touched his heart, "please? I haven't slept in days. My hands won't stop shaking."

Sesshomaru nodded. He opened their bond and sent waves of comfort and warmth into Rin. She sighed against him, her body relaxing. "You're back hurts," he rubbed it gently.

"Why is she sick?" Harutoga jumped onto his father's shoulder.

"Harutoga," Sesshomaru loosened his obi, and unclipped his armor. He slid it off with one hand, the other holding Rin, "take Chichiue's katanas and armor into my room. Tell your sister to come outside. We should tell them," Sesshomaru encouraged Rin. He soothed the ache in her back with his yoki. He could almost taste the illness on his tongue, "HISATO!"

Hisato walked in through their room, "yes? Sesshomaru-sama."

"Send Taisho and Sota to bring a deer back for Rin and have the kitchen prepare it," Sesshomaru commanded him.

Hisato shuffled his feet, "they won't leave their rooms either Sesshomaru-sama."

Harutoga came screaming out of the room with his hand on his cheek, "Yuki scratched my face!" He cried.

"Did the whole house go mad in my absence?" Sesshomaru felt frustrated, "where is Akari?" Akari was often the only one that could handle Yuki's moods.

"It's her time of the month," Rin softly muttered from under his chin, "come Haru, let Ka-san see," she motioned her son to her.

"_That_ is not an excuse," Sesshomaru growled.

"Not cycling, she won't leave her home on the new moon," Hisato told Sesshomaru. "I'm sure you aware that hanyous become human during once month."

"Not human dear one. Their yoki simply becomes latent," Gobodo-sama waltzed up behind Hisato and nibbled his neck, "my…my…look at you two. Where is Yuki?"

"I told you not to send for her, mother leave," Sesshomaru growled at Hisato. His eyes flashed red.

Harutoga finally stopped crying in Rin's lap. She moved his hand away from his face. Worry creased her face, "Sesshomaru look," she held Harutoga's face. The scratches were barely deeper than the first few layers of skin.

Sesshomaru looked at the scratches, his mouth went dry. He stood up, gently setting Rin against the Sakura tree. Rin's face was still white as snow as she leaned against the bark, wrapped in the blanket. "Hisato, find someone in this house capable of bringing Rin a deer, who isn't suffering from humanity." He walked through their room into Yuki's room. He heard her crying. There was a lump under the blanket that shivered, "Yuki come out," he said harshly.

"Go away!" She yelled from under the covers.

"Yuki," he pulled the cover off her form, revealing a black haired, brown eyed little girl.

"Don't look at me!" She covered her face, "I'm ugly!" Her nails were short and human like. Her wrist stripes and face stripes were gone. Her forehead was mark-less, "I'm ugly!" She yanked the blanket back over her head.

"Oh, you're not ugly," Gobodo-sama came into the room. She knelt next to Sesshomaru, "honestly you would think you would talk to her about this to avoid this kind of reaction."

"I told you to leave," Sesshomaru snarled at his mother.

"I was summoned," she argued back, "come out little one," she reached under the blanket and hefted Yuki out by the wrists. "Let me look at you," she held Yuki up, "stop squirming. That's it, let me see," she stroked Yuki's cheek and smiled, "you look like your mother."

"I'm an ugly human," Yuki folded her arms.

"The change isn't permanent Yuki," Sesshomaru told her.

Gobodo-sama gave Sesshomaru a fierce glare, "_the change isn't permanent? _That's what you say when you're daughter says she is ugly?"

Sesshomaru glared at his mother.

"You should be telling her how beautiful she is regardless," Gobodo-sama said furiously.

"She is beautiful, I merely wanted her to understand that this change is only for the night," Sesshomaru rolled his eyes.

"I'll look normal tomorrow morning?" Yuki asked hopeful.

"Yes dear," Gobodo-sama stroked her cheek, "now come out into the garden so I can see why this pregnancy is making your mother so sick."

"Pregnancy?" Yuki glanced from her grandmother to her father, she took a hand from each one and walked between them back to the garden. "She has a baby in her belly again?"

"Yes," Sesshomaru answered proudly.

"When is it going to come out?" Yuki let go of their hands and ran into the garden. Sesshomaru followed. He sat behind Rin and pulled her against him again.

Gobodo-sama knelt down in front of Rin. She touched Rin's stomach lightly with one clawed hand then looked in Rin's eyes. "Sooner than the rest, I'll be impressed if you make it to five months."

Rin's stomach cramped, "is something wrong? Yuki, look at you. You look like me," Rin smiled adjusting the blanket around her.

"Haru, there's a baby in Ka-san's stomach, you're going to be a big brother!" Yuki clapped her hands.

"Yuki you look funny," Harutoga wiggled his cat-like ears on top of his head.

"Shut up Haru!" Yuki raised her hand nails extended again.

Rin caught her hand, the movement alone made Rin start gagging again, "do not," she coughed holding her stomach, "hit your brother. I'm going to be sick again."

"Why not? Chichiue hits his!" Yuki stomped her foot.

Rin scowled at Sesshomaru holding back her roiling stomach, "see the example you set. I need something to drink," Rin collapsed into Sesshomaru's embrace.

"The yoki is strong, but that doesn't account for the sickness, this is a human condition," Gobodo-sama touched Rin's forehead, "relieve her of some of the nausea and ensure she eats and drinks Sesshomaru. Where is that Miko?"

Sesshomaru closed his eyes. He placed his hand over Rin's stomach. A curious sensation washed over him as he allowed his yoki to sooth her stomach. "In her own time," he answered his mother. "Hisato, why aren't Taisho and Sota coming out of their rooms."

"The transformation lasts longer for them," Rin pressed her face into his Mokomoko, "Taisho usually lasts for ten days and Sota a week. They feel self-conscious around their pure blooded Oji-sama. Hisato this doesn't happen to you?"

"Occasionally I find myself weakened, but I never revert to a human form," he answered, "I will send Sato to find Rin a deer."

"I'll go get you water Ka-san," Yuki got up and kissed her mother's cheek.

"Mother if you want to be of some use, return to Rin's childhood village and ask the hanyou Jinenji for herbs for her Rin's stomach," Sesshomaru asked annoyed.

"Of course, I will return with all haste," she lit into a giant ball, then flew into the sky in her true form.

"How did the baby get in there?" Harutoga asked, "you're tummy is fatter."

Rin chuckled while putting a hand over Sesshomaru's mouth, "we'll tell you when you are older."

Sesshomaru removed her hand, "he can't know now?" He tilted his neck.

Rin pushed his head back, "eww, don't kiss me, you taste like rotten fish," she groaned holding her stomach.

It was Sesshomaru's turn to groan in discomfort. It would be a long few months until the baby came.

**677Art** Thank you I had ridiculous fun writing the last chapter. I think Gobodo-sama may be seen more often. She cracks me up.

**Guest from Chapter 8 asking about Rin being immortal. **_Sadly...I'm not taking the immortal route with her. I may have it that being bonded and his yoki inside of her may increase her life-span a small amount, but as Gobodo-sama said in Sesshomaru and the Underworld a human life is meant to be limited. Natsuki is definitely going to mess things up but also make them better. Once I actually get further along writing it._

**Therec3iver **_Thank you! I love your reviews. I know table of contents in chapter 9 is ridiculous but who cares...it will take entirely too much effort on my lazy part to rearrange my chapters in order and put it in the beginning. Readers can just click to chapter nine and choose which story to read._


	25. Aftermath of Instinct

**Guess who figured out how to order her drabbles? This girl! Anyone else felt like this chapter was necessary after Instinct? I certainly did. It's mostly fluff wrapped in a Lemon. Enjoy**

They had been home for a week. It took the entire seven days for Rin to unpack the children's belongings and return them to the chests in their room. Then the same with her own things. Akari and Atsuko worked overtime helping her resettle into her room with Sesshomaru. At night he held her close, made love to her, and slept with Rin in his arms. His injuries had healed completely before she faced the Ogre King. His yoki was still building. He knew he needed at least one more week home recovering, before he patrolled his borders. So far they were holding. The ogres held true to their word, for once and did not challenge his lines again. Yuki and Harutoga settled happily into their rooms and spent their days playing with their friends in the village.

Rin spent her days taking care of Taiyomaru and preparing the home for Sota's upcoming wedding. It was to happen in a month in Sesshomaru's home. Sota and Taisho took up their positions with Sesshomaru's again guarding the home by day and training with Sesshomaru in the afternoons. Even weakened, the two young men couldn't best their uncle. Rin watched with Taiyomaru in her lap and giggled every time Taisho was pushed to his limits. Several times he lost control of his holy energy, which by itself wasn't strong enough to do much to Sesshomaru. Life seemed to be continuing on as it did before. Rin did her own training throughout the day against Hisato, and several times a week against Sesshomaru.

It was late in the night, when a flash of the lightning lit the sky and thunder blasted through the air that Rin woke with her heart racing. Her body shot upright. She gripped the silver sheet beneath her, holding her heart in one hand as if the motion would calm the storm she felt inside. For a moment, she felt like she couldn't breathe. Taiyomaru was not in bed next to her, neither was Sesshomaru. She lifted the cobalt blue blanket off herself and rolled off her giant futon and looked down at herself. She had completely forgotten that she was still completely naked. The evening was chilled for spring. She ran to her chest, pulled out an inner layer, quickly put it on then, pulled out one of her plain blue kimono's with a white obi. She tied it sloppily, brushed her hair out, put it into a loose pony tail and walked into the hallway.

Hisato leaned lazily against the wall, his arms crossed as usual. He still looked youthful despite his five hundred years. Akari sat on the floor, tossing one fireball in her hand to the other half dozing off. "Where is he?" Rin asked them.

"In a meeting," Hisato answered without opening his eyes.

"At this hour? With whom?" Rin started the long walk towards his study, "he is in the study isn't he?"

"That he is," Hisato acknowledged her. "Koga-sama, Kensaku-sama from the West, Ichiro for the East, Hinatamaru-sama, Sota, Sayako and Nobutada-sama, a representative from the village near where you stayed that will negotiate peace between the ogres and Sesshomaru-sama." Hisato caught Rin by the elbow, "are you okay Rin-sama?"

"What have I told you about using your nose? It's rude, if I wanted you to know what I was thinking I would tell you!" She pulled her arm loose from his grasp, "dammit, you cut my elbow," she put pressure on the wound. It was a small scratch from ripping her arm away without giving him the time to move his claws. Rin stopped, "just get me something to write with." She fumed at Hisato.

He walked ahead of her and came back in a minute with a quill, a jar of ink and piece of yellow parchment. "You better not read this," she wrote down a quick message, knowing how much Sesshomaru hated being disturbed when he was in meetings. She handed the message to Hisato upside down, so he couldn't see the drying letters on the page. "Give this to him, I'm going back to my room." Rin stormed back to her room.

Sato came up from behind Hisato. He flipped his white pony tail over his shoulders with a cocky grin on his lips, "trouble in paradise?"

"Ignore whatever you hear," Hisato flipped the paper over.

"I thought she told you not to read that?" Sato tried to turn it back over, smearing the ink.

Hisato answered with a laugh as he knocked on the door to the study, "get ready for fireworks," he whispered to the other sentinel, "this is going to make him angry," he smacked his thumb against the piece of paper.

Jaken answered the door with a sour look on his face, "what do you want?" He hissed at the black haired sentinel.

"Give this to Sesshomaru-sama, it's from Rin," Hisato handed it ink side up so Jaken would see it.

"Oh dear," Jaken trembled, "do you want to deliver it?"

"No," Hisato gave Jaken a push with the heel of his shoe, "why don't you deliver it," he shoved Jaken back into the room. "You haven't been in the house that often, now that you are, this is one of the most important lessons you will ever learn. Discretion and ignoring. Do not listen to anything they say."

"Are they about to get into a fight?" Akari juggled fireballs as she walked up the hall. Her red hair poofed out in curls around her pointed ears as the balls danced from claw to claw, "I missed this, they have the best fights." She put the fireballs out when the door flew open.

All three backed against the far wall, "we have the best fights?" Sesshomaru growled at Akari, "perhaps I should replace you."

"No…no…that won't be necessary, I'll uh…go find some dishes to wash, or some food to make, um…I'm going to the kitchens if she needs me," Akari ran on the balls of her heels down the hall.

Sesshomaru's glare turned to Sato and Hisato leaning against the wall. They immediately walked towards the public dining hall. Sesshomaru grabbed Hisato by the arm, "what is wrong with her?"

"She smelled…I'm not sure. Agitated? I believe she had a nightmare," Hisato answered quickly. "She wouldn't speak with me."

Sesshomaru ground his teeth. Taiyomaru slept in his mokomoko, _and yet she disturbs me, without disturbing me. She should be sleeping. _He had yet to tell Rin that although their bond had been restored, it wasn't as it was before. Ten years of his yoki flowing into her body couldn't be replaced overnight. He struggled to sense her moods, if she was injured, it still felt like he was pushing through a sieve to get his yoki to heal her. Then there was also the honeymoon phase they had experienced freely the first time, where they could spend all the time they wanted alone. He still craved that time with her, but their lives now had not lent them the time and he struggled with his own feelings of being apart from her. He fully planned to leave in another week, hoping his instincts to be near her, tend her and share his body with her would have been satiated enough to allow him to leave her to inspect their borders.

He knocked on their door. "Rin?" He opened the door.

He found her rummaging around in one of her trunks pulling out a warmer kimono. She removed her outer layer and pulled on the woolen one. She moved to another chest that had her tabi and boots. "What are you doing?"

"I…" she stopped in her tracks, "um…I can't do this."

He held up her note, "it's the middle of the night."

"I'm going. I said I would come back in a few days," she dug in her trunk looking for her boots.

"It takes an entire day flying," he came closer to her.

"Then maybe it will be more than a few days. Give me Taiyomaru, he can't stay with you, he still needs to nurse," Rin reached for her baby.

Sesshomaru removed her hand from the child, "Rin, you are testing my patience."

"Like you didn't test mine by taking someone else. Give me Taiyomaru. I said I would come back," her voice was raising. Behind them it continued to rain. It started coming down in sheets.

Sesshomaru's eyes narrowed, his golden orbs darkened, "we agreed you would not bring that up."

"It's kind of hard not to," she tried to reach for the baby again, only for her arms to be pushed down. "Sesshomaru," she warned him.

"It's raining, it's the middle of the night," he pulled her by the elbow into his chest, "what's wrong?"

"I need to talk to someone, I'm not comfortable with this," she pushed on his chest, "let me go."

"No," he held her firmly to him, "not comfortable with what?"

"Her! Dammit!" Rin pushed against him, "let me go, I hate it when you do this!"

"The last time I let you go when you were mad, you disappeared for two months without telling me where you went!" Sesshomaru bellowed at her.

"Because you went and bonded someone else and bedded them twice!" She shouted at back at him.

Taiyomaru started crying from the raised voices, "you woke him up," Sesshomaru growled at her, "keep your voice down."

"Or what?" Rin folded her arms, "you're letting me go. I said I would return that should be good enough for you."

"Good enough for what? Is this those human hormones the Miko talks about?"

"No it's not you ass! It's you…I don't even know what to call you because you won't let me call you my husband, having a mistress on the side and somehow I'm supposed to be comfortable with it!"

"She is not my mistress," Sesshomaru flashed back at her, "and she will not be a part of our lives-"

"Until I die! So now you want me to die?"

Sesshomaru's breath was coming out more furiously than it was before, "no! You are being irrational."

"And your being an arrogant jerk!" She turned her back on him, "I want to talk to someone else about this."

"Shall I call Hisato in?" He attempted to control his voice.

"I want to talk to someone that isn't a dog demon," she pushed his hands off her shoulders.

"Can it wait until morning. I will accompany you."

"I want to go alone," Rin sighed, "I'm sorry…I'm not okay with this, I'm not. I don't like that she is sitting around in the back of your head."

Sesshomaru growled low, "take Hisato."

"Dog demon…" she reminded him.

"All of our guards are," Sesshomaru tried to take her shoulder again, only for her to pull out of his grasp.

"The only dog demon I want with me is our son," she whispered, "I'm sorry, I need to do this."

"Honesty Rin, we agreed. What aren't you telling me?" He closed the space between them. He kept his hands at his sides for fear of pushing her further away, "will you tell this Sesshomaru nothing?"

"I don't like that she is still bound to you, or that you had sex with her again," Rin said quietly.

"It was only to quiet her so we could live like this, without her interfering in our lives. Let me hold you," he touched her shoulder timidly, "let me hold you." He repeated himself.

Rin turned into his chest.

"Did it hurt you that badly to allow me that?"

Rin nodded against his chest, "I said yes because she was trying to make up for what she did. What if you are tempted again? I don't want to share you." She wrapped her arms around his chest, "is that so awful?"

Sesshomaru smiled against her brow, "it's too wet to take Taiyomaru now, and you are tired. Sleep, in the morning you may go. I will inform Akari, I believe she knows battle well enough to keep you safe."

"Really?" Rin gazed up at Sesshomaru.

He tilted his neck and kissed her lips, "I will join you in a day."

"You're hovering," she whispered, "it's getting on my nerves."

"I can't sense you like before," he said softly to her, "there isn't enough my yoki inside of you." He traced her jaw line with his thumb, "I couldn't sense this agitation you feel."

"What happened to all that yoki you used to heal me?"

"It wasn't all mine," he whispered and kissed his nose. "It's purpose was to heal you, not to nourish our bond. Ten years of my yoki going into your body, cannot be replaced overnight. I know better how to wield what is there with our connection, but I still cannot sense you. I cannot comfort you."

"You couldn't find me by sense alone?" Rin asked him.

"No," he shook his head, "compromise with this Sesshomaru. I yearn to be near you, as when I first bonded you. Allow me this, and I will allow you to go to Bukoseno alone."

"Okay," Rin agreed softly.

"Get back in bed," he loosened her obi and removed her outer layer. He set it back over her trunk then removed her inner layer. He smelled the curve of her neck, "you are erratic."

"Maybe I am tired," she let him pick up the teal yukata from the marble floor. He slid in one of her arms than the other.

"Then sleep my heart," he whispered in her ear, "you need rest." He tied her obi and led her to their bed.

"You aren't sleeping as much," she yawned as she set her head on the pillows.

He allowed himself a mild smile, "the healing is almost complete, it's unnecessary."

"Why are you meeting with everyone now?"

"If this Sesshomaru remembers, I promised my heart, a month home after our child was born. We had two weeks together, before we separated. I still owe you two more weeks. My days are for you and the children," he kissed Rin while he sat on his knees. "Last week was one," he kissed her even deeper, "this week, will be two."

"And then?" Rin smiled sleepily.

"My time was taken up by the southern border in the past, now that the ogres have recognized their place, I believe I will be able to be home weeks at a time, and only gone perhaps a week. You and I will discuss a new schedule, when it is not the middle of the night," he let his lips fall on hers again. "In the morning, you will eat breakfast with this Sesshomaru and our children. Then you may leave. I will arrange for my mother to take Harutoga and Yuki for a few days, then join you."

"Alone time?" Rin grinned.

"Alone time," he nodded. He cupped the back of her head and ran his fingers through her hair, "did you have another nightmare?"

She blushed.

"Do you want to tell me about it?" Sesshomaru sat down next to Rin.

"No," she sighed, "it's not any different than the other ones I've been having. It was just worse because you weren't here," she touched the futon next to her. "That's not entirely true," she said almost silently. "I dreamt you went to her again. That you chose her over me."

"Never," he breathed in the scent of her hair, "never. You are the one I wish to be with."

"I know," she said softly, "thank you. For understanding."

"This Sesshomaru does not understand," he said, "I must return."

"Tell me next time? Please? You probably thought I wouldn't wake up. So I know where you are?"

"Yes, go to sleep," he stroked her cheek with his finger, "I can't stay until you are asleep. I will return before you wake up."

"He's going to get hungry," she touched Taiyomaru's face.

"Look what grew," he opened the infants mouth slightly. Inside Taiyomaru's mouth were four tiny fangs poking through his red gums.

"Fangs!?" Rin gasped, "he can eat real food now!"

"I gave him raw boar earlier, he loved it," Sesshomaru smiled, the one that was reserved for Rin and no one else.

"That's disgusting," Rin sighed.

"It's delicious," he tickled her. He set his forehead against Rin's, "my heart," he shook his head, "I love you." He touched his heart. He had felt panicked getting that letter. He hated how fragile their reunification felt, as if it at any moment it would break. Despite their bond, he understood how fragile it really was.

"I love you too," she curled into her pillows. She gave his hand a reassuring squeeze as he rose to leave the room.

Rin and Akari spent the next day riding Aun to Bukoseno's forest. Rin remembered it from when she was a child. It was full of magnolia trees. It was impossible to navigate flying for all the branches and leaves that poked out. Aun landed in the clearing before, "stay here and eat Aun. I'll go in alone."

"I'll be here, yell if you need me," Akari jumped off of Aun's back rubbing her bottom with orange heated hands, "I'm getting too old for this." She laughed.

"How old are you?" Rin asked her.

"Four hundred and twenty seven," she smiled. Her red eyes lit up. "Two hundred years ago I was a guard in a castle in the east with the other fire cats. My husband was an important Lord, until our relationship and then he was driven from his lands." She clicked her tongue and shook her head, "until you wanted to make this village, we had nowhere to go. Now, never leave again! You have no idea how miserable he was."

"Miserable?" Rin wore Taiyomaru strapped to her back.

"I mean that everything was dirty to him, clean this, clean that. I smell this, I smell that, don't clean that, it was like he was bored and that was when he was home, when he wasn't, the house was so cold he refused to light any of the fires. It was almost funny watching the great Sesshomaru-sama pine like that."

Rin giggled, "that sounds terrible. I'm going in stay here."

She walked into the forest trying to retrace the steps she took when she was younger, "Bukoseno-sama!" She called into the forest. "Bukoseno-sama! It's Rin!"

"Rin!" The voice boomed through the forest. "This way," leaves shivered and branches reached out to her.

"There you are!" Rin called. She hiked her yellow kimono up to her knees. She supported Taiyomaru against her back with one hand while she ran through the tall grasses to the old Magnolia tree. "I couldn't remember where you were."

"Turn around, let me see this little one," the kind old face turned Rin with his branches. They touched Taiyomaru, "so important this child." He tickled the baby under the chin with his leaves.

Taiyomaru laughed.

"I…" Rin choked, "I need to ask about Inu-yokai bonds."

"You're hear about Natsuki?" The old tree said knowingly.

"How do you know about her?" Rin asked the tree.

"He is bound to two now. Who do you think told Gobodo-sama about her?"

"Great, so all this is your fault," Rin sat down in front of the tree.

"Natsuki has been playing in my boughs since she was a little girl. I sensed the connection a hundred winters ago. Of course that was before he knew you and she was not yet at the age of maturity," Bukoseno explained to Rin. "After he bound you, Gobodo-sama came to me and asked me to help her find others."

"I wish she wouldn't have," Rin picked at the grass by her toes, "I wish she would have just left well enough alone."

"Are you jealous dear Rin?" The wrinkled face asked her.

"I must be. I keep thinking that at any moment she is going to call him back to her. Or they're going to want to be together again, and I can't live like that. I don't want to share Sesshomaru. He's mine," she said firmly, "I shouldn't have to share him."

"According to human standards no. You do know how to break Inu-yokai bonds," he said knowingly, "he came to me, while you were missing, after it broke. He didn't understand how the bond could be broken and how he could keep looking for you. He wanted to believe it was his children, but it was his great love for you that kept him searching. He does not love her."

"Everyone keeps saying that. He still wanted to be with her again," she set her elbows on her knees and her chin on her hands.

"That need was primal Rin. Their bond was vastly disrupted by how it was cemented. Think about it, your bond was cemented in love. Do you know after a bond is formed dog demons need anywhere between two weeks to two months to spend that time with their soulmates? Part of it is the primal nature of it, but their bond was cemented in heartbreak. When he bound himself to Natsuki, it caused a rift between you and Sesshomaru. That rift broke his heart and damaged his bond to Natsuki. They never had those weeks to cement their bond. Even if they did, a bond birthed from pain, may never grow into love. It's difficult to explain but think of it like this, they were drawn together that last time because their yoki kept getting entangled together to save your life. It's addictive, but that is not love. His love for you, is what always brings him back to you. He will not seek her out, and she has agreed to not seek him out. Their yokis will no longer entangle each other and in a way this is better than breaking it. If you killed her, Tsukimaru would grow up without a mother, and Sesshomaru would experience a modicum of pain. You know the other way the bond is broken?"

"Heart ache," she suppled still picking at the grass.

"Would you want him to fall in love with her?" Bukoseno asked Rin.

"No, that would hurt worse than what happened. It was just blind stupid dog demon instinct before," she sighed. "I guess that makes sense."

"Does it make it easier to live with?" Bukoseno lifted her chin with his branches. "He will not seek her out. She will not call for him unless her life or Tsukimaru's life is in danger. For the rest of your life, he is yours, my dear Rin. And what a changed demon he is for it, aren't you Sesshomaru."

"Dammit," Rin glanced over her shoulder, "I told you I wanted to come alone."

"He can't help it," Bukoseno smiled as Sesshomaru walked towards Rin, "for you the bond is as it always was. For him, it is new. He needs this time with you to cement what you once had. Let me play with this little one, you two go find somewhere private to be together." His branches reached into the sling over Rin's back and plucked out Taiyomaru.

Rin stood up and greeted Sesshomaru. She grasped his hand in hers, "I should be mad at you for not giving me space."

He lowered his head and brushed his lips against hers, not caring that Bukoseno was watching. He cupped her chin in his hand and slid the other around her waist, "I sent Akari home with Aun. Come, come with me." He led Rin through the forest.

"Where are we going?" Rin asked him.

"You'll see," he led her quietly behind him hand in hand. He walked with her until they met a river. They followed it upstream for half a mile until they came to a small villa. It wasn't very large. It was only one story, it was made from stone with intricately carved decorations. One of them was two dog demons, standing on their back legs, their mouths met in the center where the roof peaked, their front paws touched. "This was my family's villa, centuries ago," he brought Rin onto a stone pathway. He touched the two dogs that seemed like they were kissing, "new couples would spend weeks in this room, making love, cementing their bond."

He pulled Rin into the brightly lit villa. There was a futon on the floor, covered with the colors of their home, a golden sheet with a blood red blanket. The air was cool, moss covered the outer stone. Inside a small fire was lit, with a kettle and a pot. Next to the fire there was cooked rice, meet and vegetables. Rin could smell mint, from her favorite tea leaves, "you sent Akari to prepare this didn't you?"

"Come inside," he pulled Rin into the small villa. He closed the door behind them. He lowered himself onto one knee in front of Rin, "do you know how I love you?"

Rin grinned like she was a teenager all over again. "You aren't wearing your armor," she giggled.

"No," he smiled back at her, "it's in the corner," he lowered his other knee. "In this time, human marriages are arranged." He considered his words, "this Sesshomaru would not have allowed you to enter into a loveless marriage. Ten years ago," he pulled Rin's hand to his chest, sliding her fingers under the material of his light blue haori to rest on the scar over his chest, "I bound you to me, making us one soul. Two and a half weeks ago, you gave this back to me. You have made this Sesshomaru very happy. Spend a week with me in this villa. Let us cement our bond, as it once was."

"Are you asking me to marry you again?" Rin knew how much he hated human terms.

He grabbed Rin around the waist and slit off her obi from the back, he pulled her knees out from underneath her. He controlled her fall as she laughed in his arms. He set her down on her back against the futon. He pulled open her layers and licked his lips, "how is it you get more beautiful the older you get?"

"And you never age, you look the same as the day I met you," she ran two fingers over his cheek stripes. Her breathing quickened as one hand slid up her slender waist. "Are you asking me to marry you again?" She whispered.

"No, I am asking you to spend a week in seclusion with me," he kissed the skin of her belly button, "I am asking you to spend the rest of your life with this Sesshomaru," his lips breathed fire against her abdomen. He nipped at her ribs, "I am telling you, this Sesshomaru, is yours for the rest of your life," he tugged lightly on one of her nipples.

Rin pulled his chin up to her face, "who will care for Taiyomaru?" She accepted his mouth against hers. Her hands worked on his obi, "it's not fair only you can cut my clothes."

Sesshomaru pulled her katana from her side and handed it to her. He arched a playful eyebrow at her. She slit his obi from around his waist laughing. He shirked out of his Haori, "Bukoseno seems content with Taiyomaru. I will hear his cries from here. Mother took Yuki and Harutoga. My soulmate slew an Ogre-King so our borders are stable. Spend this week with me," he pressed his body over hers. He cupped her left breast with his hand, he rolled her nipples in between his fingers. She arched her back into his touch. He licked the tip, flicking it with his tongue.

Rin closed her eyes in ecstasy, "yes," she whispered. She sat up, letting her layers fall to the wayside. Her knees opened letting him find his place between her legs, "your wearing too many clothes." She tugged at the obi holding his pants on. He slid them off his hips. He pulled her legs down so she flopped on her back.

"Lay down," he commanded her, "this time," he pinned her arms against her sides, "this time, this Sesshomaru will care for you."

"Let me touch you," her voice was seductive. He released her hands. Her hands trailed down his waist, over the mounds of muscles in his stomach and wrapped around his member.

"Your scent spikes when you touch me," he pushed his hips into her hands, "does this please you? Touching this Sesshomaru?"

"Yes," she panted into his mouth. Their lips met, wet, hot and pleading with each other. "Kiss me," she whispered in his ears.

"Where?" The side of his mouth curved into a half smile, "here?" He kissed the curve of her neck, "or here?" He smiled into the kiss between her breasts. "Or perhaps, right here," his fingers toyed with the skin just above her opening while his mouth opened and closed over the tip of her breast. She moaned as his tongue worked its way around her nipples.

"There is good," she ran her fingers through the sides of his hair. She thought of how lucky she was to be with him. How it was her that he had chosen despite what had happened between them and the things she said to him. "Oh," his mouth covered her other breast eliciting more whines from her mouth. She arched into his mouth. "You," her breaths came out quickly, "aren't going to let me," fingers covered her mouth.

"It is my turn, shh, unless you are making that sound," her moans were intoxicating to him. They encouraged his expedition of her body. He was determined to kiss every inch of her stomach, starting from beneath her breasts, to her sides, the points of her rips, each square shaped muscle on her abdomen. He ran his tongue over the wicked diamond shaped scar, "you risked your life for this Sesshomaru."

"I love this Sesshomaru," Rin pulled his face back up to hers, "so much it hurts," she held his hand to her breast over heart.

"So much it stings," he offered pressing his lips to hers.

"So much I can't breathe without you," she licked the roof of his mouth and traced the contours of his lips with her tongue.

"Let me love you," he continued his conquest of her body. His returned to her scar, tracing the tips and edges then flicking his tongue down the line over the middle of her stomach.

"Sesshomaru," she sighed his name. His tongue was moving lower, she let her legs splay to the sides knowing what he was about to do. He enjoyed this as much as she did. His tongue was lighting a fire in her belly, a fire below that felt like it would swallow her whole. Her entire body was boiling like honey. He kissed around her belly button, over one side then the other. He lifted her knees beneath his arms, holding her buttocks in his hands. He kissed from her knee down her thighs, licking her smooth skin on one leg, then repeated it on the other.

"Stop teasing me," Rin rocked her hips towards his face, "please?" She begged him. "It's so hot."

He nipped down the inside of her thigh, stopping just at the point where her leg ended and her lips began. He inhaled the scent of her arousal, "you taste like honey," he opened her petals and licked her core, he sucked her bud into her mouth, "you taste like fresh rain, and spring dew." He slid his fingers inside of her, "release for me, my heart," he pushed against her insides, "you're so wet for this Sesshomaru."

"Sesshomaru," she moaned, "yes," she rocked her hips against his hand, "oh, please?"

He flicked his tongue up and down against her growing bud, he could feel it hardening. He suckled it, and pushed, flattening his tongue against it. It was coming, he could feel it. She was flinching and bucking her hips against him. He stopped, wiped his mouth and returned to her eyes. He memorized their shape and color in that moment. They were like ripe almonds, and deep brown. They were glazed in deep passion, begging for release. Her hand gripped his wrist.

"Why did you stop?" She could barely catch her breath.

"To see your eyes," he pushed his fingers back inside and thumbed her slowly, "release my heart," he kissed her mouth. Her moans intensified, he felt her harden against his hand, then her walls pulsate, he stifled her moans in her mouth. He lifted himself on top of her, he nestled himself between her legs, softly pushing inside of her. "Rin," he groaned in her ear. He opened their bond in that moment, flooding her body with his yoki, "oh," he grunted.

She wrapped her legs around his waist driving him in further with her heels. He pressed his lips into hers, they moaned and panted together as he thrusted within her. They whispered I love yous and each other's names. He felt his yoki connect with their bond, his breath flew from his lungs feeling the depth of their connection, the truth of their love. He flushed warm fluid inside of her, then collapsed half to the side of her panting. His mouth rest next to her cheek. She turned her head and kissed his lips, "that was good."

"Very good," he moved the hair from her face, "I love you and only you," he pulled himself out of Rin. She rolled to snuggle on top of his warm chest. "I choose you."

"And I you," Rin pulled his mouth to hers, "forever."

"Forever," he returned the kiss drinking in the taste of her mouth and the warmth of her breath.

**And for anyone looking for Trafficked it is back on Archive of Our Own. Same username Elohiniar**

**Warriormaiden60: **_The next one will be for you I hope. I started thinking about how to write Hisato and Gobodo-sama but I haven't quite gotten there yet. Give me some time and I will write it._

**Lucy:** _See they still love each other. Did I make you cry again?_

**Kimmigirl9:** _I love Rin in this. She is strong she can handle a lot and is afraid of almost nothing and still girly. _


	26. Hisato and Gobodo-sama

**Warriormaiden60 this one is for you. This is the best I can do for now. I'm actually finding this very difficult. I will write another to follow this at some point where he returns the relationship. Of course it had to end in some lemon-lime action. I'm not sure if what they did was lemoning and liming. **

**Hisato and Gobodo-sama**

Hisato rested in a high tree. Jomon Sugi were his favorite since he was a child. The branches were gnarled, tangled like lovers lost inside their arms. The trunks were made of tall dry wood that peeled easily. He grew up in a castle in the clouds, as soon as he mastered flying he left. That was some two hundred years before. For three generations his family had lived there, ever since his human great-grandmother and inu-yokai great-grandfather died early deaths and the queen of the castle took in his grand-father. Since that time, his family lived and served in the castle in the sky. They were guards, chefs, maids and manservants. He had two brothers, and a handful of cousins.

He was just over four hundred years old. Perhaps he looked slightly older than the average four hundred year old dog demon because of the small amount of human blood that coursed through his veins. His black hair was longer than he preferred, it was braided, falling down to the middle of his back. His skin was slightly darker and his face was double striped in jagged lines, triple on his wrists. He wore his mokomoko looped around both his shoulders. Something was tickling his senses. He was unsure what it was. For days he felt like he had eyes on him, watching him. No matter where he went, to the river to bathe, in the forest to hunt for food, or when he found a quiet space to sleep. This time as he felt the sensation, it was followed by a lightening of his heart. The hair raised on his arms. It felt like the forest had eyes again. He said out loud, "you might as well come out. I know you're there." He knew he wasn't the most powerful dog demon. That's why he never searched for the strongest enemies to face as did many other youths, he wasn't in a rush to die. This feeling though, he had not felt it since he left the castle centuries before. The woman who dominated the castle in the sky was stronger than any, her son next to her, and behind that many other pure-blooded Inu-yokai. He never felt slighted by his humanity, it was who he was and he was comfortable with that. Even if he couldn't transform and every twenty or thirty years he was weakened for several days.

Then there she was. He would never tell anyone, but Gobodo-sama was one of the most beautiful demonesses he had ever seen. High cheekbones that were highlighted by lightening stripes, delicately long and deadly fingers. Her skin was as soft as moonlight. His favorite was her hair. She wore it as if she was still a little girl, tied back into two high pony tails. She was always impeccably dressed in the finest layers of silk. She wore her many mokomokos around her shoulders and feet. They brushed against the forest ground, pushing aside the dead leaves and leaving a small trail in the dirt.

He leapt out of his perch, landing lightly in front of her. His heart alighted, she was beautiful. He folded one hand over his chest and knelt, "Gobodo-sama, it is good to see you again."

"Wicked boy, Hisato," she circled him hungrily. Her yoki was rising, he could feel it. Her power was intoxicating, her eyes were red. She stalked around him, touching his shoulders playfully with her middle finger, "you haven't returned to see me since you were a boy. You are not a little boy anymore," her nose came incredibly close to the back of his neck. He felt a wetness along slide along the curve of his neck.

He cleared his throat and rolled his shoulders, "is there something I can help you with, Gobodo-sama?" She was giving him goosebumps.

"Damn your human blood," she dropped her blue overcoat onto the ground. "Do you not feel it?" She sniffed his neck, "yearn for it?" She stopped when she faced him. She closed the gap between them and touched his heart, "one soul."

It finally registered what she was doing. He had been warned about this feeling, but his father and grandfather both said it was likely he would doubt it. It would start with a tingling, then a yearning, but he had never expected it before, not from her. He cleared his throat, "you…want me?"

"Of course not. Why would I want one with tainted blood?" She laughed. She took his other hand and placed it over her heart, "my instinct wants you and who am I to deny it. Do you not feel it?"

Hisato smiled softly, "you are too above me, to be mine," he attempted to remove his hand from her breast.

She snarled lower at him, and shoved him against the trunk of a tree. "Deny this," she flung her lips against his, pressing so hard he could feel her fangs cut into his lips. He felt something then, more than just the tingling of his skin, he felt sparks, like his lips were on fire.

"It wouldn't be right," he pushed her back, "you are pure blooded, your kind, does not take my kind."

"Shut up," she pulled his mouth down to hers with one hand while untying her purple obi and letting it fall to the ground, "become one with me," she slammed him against the trunk of the tree, "but if you impregnate me, I will kill you."

He couldn't stop his laughter. It rolled out of his mouth in waves, "and you will tell me this secret? You expect me to bond you and not create a child?" It was their way, in most couples the first bonding resulted in a child. He felt something, she was bringing out a yearning him, but it was so slight that he was unsure if what he was feeling was true, or imagined, or if she was just in heat and looking for someone to scratch her itch.

"I am not in heat, take off your clothes," she clawed down the front of his haori, shredding his obi.

He pushed her hands down to her sides, despite the small trickles of blood streaming down his chest, "this is not the way."

"It is our way," he felt her yoki raise again, this time it tangled itself into his. It created a passion inside of him, a yearning, a feeling of completeness, "become one with me," this time she wasn't asking. She laced her lips against his. She let her first layer fall to the ground. "Complete me."

He was having a harder time refusing her, "and what will you tell your foolhardy son?" He stroked her cheek with his thumb, "your courtiers?"

"That you are mine," she whispered seductively.

Oh, but it was intoxicating. It was like she was meant for him. It was almost as if their two yokis were two fires, dancing together, twisting around each other. Was this the feeling he was told about? "You would take one with tainted blood?"

"Enough words, Hisato," she pulled his haori off his shoulder revealing a toned body with double stripes that pointed down to his growing heat.

He stopped in his tracks, she had never called him just Hisato and certainly not in that tone of voice before. Her lips and tongue were working their way down his chest, over his carved abdomen. He stopped her hands from untying his pants. He lift her chin so their eyes were on level with each other. He sniffed her neck tenderly, she was not in heat, was she really interested in him? Not just interested, she wanted to bond him, a lifetime together. Kami her arousal was intoxicating, he could barely breathe. "I will give you what you want, but I will not bind myself to you. You deserve better than me," he whispered in her ear. He removed one layer of clothing from her slender body, then another, and another, until she was just in her white see-through inner layer. She was milk white, and despite her age, which no one knew, beautiful. He kissed down her neck softly. He felt her yoki entering into his again, pushing at his senses.

He lowered her onto the forest floor on top of the pile of clothing she had left. Then stopped.

She started cackling, "oh my, Hisato is this your first time with a woman?"

"No," he shoved her shoulders back onto the piles of clothing. That's when he noticed the supple teeth marks on her neck, "I am not he." He caressed them with the tips of his fingers. He knew what she wanted, he could feel it tugging at him. He would allow her to bond him, but he was not ready to return it.

"He died, long ago. My heart is ready to move on. Take off your pants," she stroked his cheek with one hand then untied his pants with the other. Their mouths met again, slower this time, deeper and more passionate.

He knew what she needed. He set her hand over his heart and kissed her neck. He stopped long enough to look at her body. She was proud, seemingly emotionless, but naked she lay before him, on her back. He touched the dip in her stomach, he pressed his mouth into the curve, nipping just enough to feel her muscles tighten. He moved lower and lower. Her claws dug into the sides of his head lightly. He stopped between her legs, glancing back up at her, "you really want me to do this?"

"I'm begging you," she sat up, eyes still red with lust, she pushed his face down to her, "damn your human blood," she panted as his tongue went to work on her. She lay back down on her back. She arched her back, pulling her knees back to her chest to widen herself for him. "Mmh, Hisato," she stroked the hair on the back of his head, "please, help me," she felt vulnerable, strange and off kilter but he had been calling to her for the last fifty years without even knowing. She gasped when he inserted his fingers inside of her, she was so close, her yoki rose like a flood, pouring into her belly. She stopped her body from instantly going into another heat, that wasn't what she wanted. She was done raising children. After her second son, she didn't any more.

He pushed against her core, and sucked on her until she could barely breathe. With one last flick of his tongue she was done, moaning and gasping. For a moment, he thought his own eyes would turn red. She tasted like sweet candy, like a hot fire, he wanted to bury himself in her. He let it go, leaning back on his haunches, feeling more aroused than before. He looked down knowing that he wanted to finish inside of her but refused. He told his body to stop reacting, stood up and wiped his hand on the ground. He bowed to her and sighed, "I have given you what you wanted, Gobodo-sama."

"This is not what I wanted, Hisato," she stood up, still naked, still beautiful. "It is incomplete. I can feel your yearning. Why do you ignore it? Why stop?" She grasped his heat in her hand. She raised his hand to her heart, "complete it."

He shook his head, "I can't. It's not right. Your need is satiated," he stroked her chin, "you are above me. As you always were. Why would a queen love a knight in her castle? Why would you lower yourself to one such as me?"

"I do not ask you for children," she nipped at his earlobe.

"You carry the mark of someone else," he reminded her. Her hand knew what it was doing. He shoved her back and clawed her hand off his delicate erection.

"He is dead," she said quietly, "who would have thought, a few drops of human blood and you can resist your instinct?" She scoffed at him and returned to her clothes, "you will come back to me Hisato, you will complete this bond."

"Perhaps one day," he bent over and picked his pants up, "that day is not today," he smiled at her. "It was good seeing you again, Gobodo-sama." She was already gone, she was not the kind to beg. He stared at his hand, he had touched her most intimate parts. He had kissed her body. She always seemed so far away, so untouchable and there she was…he couldn't believe it. He dressed quickly, he needed to soak in a cold river.

**Warriormaiden60: **Thank you! I loved making these drabbles too. They have been fun. Hope you liked this.


	27. Dog Sounds

**This one has just been playing out in my head. I kind of want to enjoy them in the villa together.**

It was the third morning of their seclusion together. Summer was coming. The white stone of the villa sweat with dew that dripped in a nonrhythmic tone onto the stone flooring. The green moss that bathed the sides of the white walls held in bits of the moisture. Birds chirped from the rooftop. One in particular, the Bush Warbler sung from the plump branches of the Camaphor trees. Their long arms stretched across the expanse of the vast courtyard, shading the shattered ruins of what used to be Sesshomaru's childhood home. Rin stirred lightly from the confines of the villa. When Sesshomaru said a week of seclusion, he meant it. For the last three days, food magically appeared outside their door three times a day. The tray was always filled with freshly cooked rice wrapped in seaweed, vegetables of varying kinds and either fish, fowl or more sumptuous meats. Next to that was a bowl of raw meat thickly marinating in its own blood for Sesshomaru. A bowl of fruit that was kept in the corner of the villa near the futon on a low table was constantly being refilled. Rin never saw who dropped them off, or who picked them up. She didn't hear the scuttling of feet or the soft timbre of voices. The villa was quiet besides their lovemaking, Taiyomaru's occasional cries and the sounds of birds.

She opened her eyes, shielding them from the morning sun. Along one wall was a vast window that had bamboo shades. It was closed at night, but without fail, someone opened it during the day. Sesshomaru slept next to her, breathing evenly. She was enjoying having someone to actually sleep with. In the past, he accompanied her at night until she fell asleep and then would attend to his duties. The seclusion was meant to nurture their bond. Knowing better how to wield it, he spent the days pumping her full of as much of his yoki as was safe in one sitting. The effects tired him, but were worth it. He told her that he could finally somewhat sense her emotions in the back of his head. When he left Taiyomaru with Bukoseno, he felt her presence like the delicate rustling of a flower. When they were finished with this week, he said it would make up for at least five years of his yoki going inside of her, not the entire ten. It would take time to replenish what was lost.

Rin stretched her arms out. Her toes pointed down. She rolled onto her back, groaning as her muscles came alive with the morning. She listened to the sound of the song birds, wondering what the sounds meant. She had heard tell of birds that sang love songs to each other before they mated in the spring. The thought made her smile. Sesshomaru would never sing to her, but the words he often spoke, were the most poetic things she had ever heard. Taiyomaru fussed next to her, "are you hungry my love?" She asked the little baby. She quickly changed his diaper and picked him up, latching him onto her breast. He was a chubby five month old, full with fangs now. He clamped down on her eliciting an, "ow," from her lips. She pushed her finger into the corner of his mouth wiggling it against her nipple to get free, "I should grow scales," she laughed.

She heard a snort from behind her. Claws danced their way up and down her bare back. He had not allowed her to dress in the last three days. Their bodies had spent the days combining in a symphony. In the night hours they spoke as they often had before. To all who knew him, Sesshomaru was quiet and reserved. In her presence, she drew words from him like water from a well. He had stories to tell, he had interests, he shared them with none but her. She stroked her infant son's stripped cheek, "he may have my hair, but he looks like you." She rolled her left shoulder and groaned slightly. Sesshomaru sat up behind her. He moved his legs so she sat between them and pulled her shoulders back to rest in his embrace. He brushed his teeth and fangs along her neck. He rubbed her shoulders, gathering her hair and pushing it away from her neck. He ran his nose over the curve of the right side of her neck and tenderly dug his teeth into the supple flesh enough to make her flinch but not draw blood. He had seen it too often lately. Her hand absently drifted to the ride side, just at the juncture of her neck and shoulder where Touma had bit her. She rubbed the area, not even registering the far off look in her own eyes, or the movement of her fingers against her flesh. He thought it best, if he began erasing the memory with his own teeth. She smiled this time and caressed his cheek, "is it helping?" He asked her.

"Am I doing it less?" She rolled her shoulders into his chest, "mmh, my love."

"My heart," he whispered in her ear, "yes. Your hand is moving there less. The sensation will fade in time."

"It really hurt. Why didn't I feel your yoki enter me the first time but I felt his?" She turned her face up to capture his lips.

He wrapped his arms around her waist just under Taiyomaru. "Rest against me. This Sesshomaru will hold him," he held Taiyomaru to her breast giving her shoulders a break. "Perhaps, because we are meant to be and he was not."

"It felt evil and ominous. It made my skin crawl," she shuddered. "He's finished, he needs the other side."

No one would know that a Dai-yokai with his reputation would know a woman's breasts so well. But this wasn't the first child he had watched her nurse. He turned the child in his hand. Taiyomaru was already very experienced finding his target, "ow…I think he doesn't know he has fangs," her finger shot to the corner of his mouth again trying to loosen his latch on her breast. The baby cried for a moment before returning to the nipple and suckling it. "Men should have to nurse."

She heard rumbling from behind her. She knew that was his laughter. At times he could release a good belly laugh, but those moments were rare. Most of the time it consisted of a series of rumbles from deep within his chest and a smile that was reserved for her and her alone. Taiyomaru finished quickly. Sesshomaru took him from Rin. Something else he had done often in their time there. "You really missed them, didn't you?"

"I missed so much," he rubbed the infant's cheek. "His first smile, his first laugh."

"I'm sorry," Rin's guilt washed over her again like the tepid waves of an angry ocean.

"Rin," he corrected her firmly, "we agreed. We were both at fault." They had agreed that his actions drove her from him and that how she responded to them were cruel and immature. Then he added, "we agreed not to remind each other of the pain we caused."

She turned around and snuggled into his bare chest holding him around the waist. He had also not dressed, except to take Taiyomaru to play with Bukoseno. She kissed his collar bone. A low rumble she knew meant he was satisfied echoed in his chest. She touched his sternum where she felt the vibrations, "do all inu-yokai make these noises?"

"Ten years together, and you ask this Sesshomaru now?" There was the rumbling that was his laughter again. She sat up with a blanket around her waist. She pulled his mouth to hers. Their lips gingerly pecked at each other, full of love. He pulled back, "we do have noises. Why ask now?"

"Well…you made that sound, in your true form, when Natsuki was giving birth to Tsukimaru," she twiddled her thumbs quietly. "You never made that noise for me."

"It was unnecessary. Come closer," he pulled her body against his. "You are beautiful."

"You tell me that often," she whispered lost in his eyes.

He stroked her cheeks, staring into her eyes. He rubbed her cheek bone with her thumb.

"Can you make the sound like this? In this form?" She ran her hand along his chest.

He arched an eyebrow at her curiously.

"Please?" She pouted her bottom lip out.

He rolled his eyes annoyed. A soft purring came from deep within his thoracic cavity. It shook his chest, vibrating Rin right along with it. She knew it was meant to be a comforting sound. It tickled her shoulder and reminded her of a mother cat. She buried her nose into is chest and sniggered. In her efforts to stifle the sound she snorted which made her laugh even more.

He pushed her back by the shoulders giving her a look that dared her to speak.

"You sound like a cat!" She coughed in laughter, "a mother cat!" She held her stomach laughing more. "You're supposed to be a dog demon, are you sure you have no cat in your blood?"

He growled low at her with a severe look of frustration in his eyes.

"Sorry," she tried to stop her laughter, "that's comfort?" She slapped her knee and kept cackling.

The low growl came from Sesshomaru again.

Rin covered her mouth trying to stop her laughter, "sorry," she wiped her mouth, "I know that sound. That means you are annoyed," she giggled quietly to herself.

He nodded his head at her.

"I'm hungry," she went to stand up.

A more seductive, possessive growl, that sounded like a yearning snarl came from his lips. His right arms tightened around her waist.

"And that one means 'stay put'," she pulled his mouth to hers. "This Rin also needs to relieve herself. There is no chamber pot in this room. Sesshomaru," she warned him, "shall I go on your lap?"

He tickled her sides with his claws and kissed her neck. "Mmmh," he sighed against her skin.

"And that one means you are satisfied," she pulled his mouth back down to hers. "I'll come back quickly," she broke the kiss. She grabbed a white silken yukata and threw it over her shoulders. She ran out of the villa to the area that was set aside for her use. Dog demons did use the bathroom but she learned quickly what they released wasn't as putrid as what humans did and was quickly absorbed into the earth. It was strange that was another difference between them. When she came back Taiyomaru was gone. Sesshomaru was still completely naked, but he had pulled in the tray of food that was outside their door.

He grabbed Rin as soon as she came back and pulled the yukata off her shoulders. "Come to bed." He pulled her onto the futon.

She groaned and rolled her eyes.

"That sound means you are annoyed," he nipped at her shoulder. Having some sense of her feelings through their bond he added, "because you wish to eat. And something," two fingers tickled their way down the center of her stomach, around her navel and pressed into the warmth of her folds, "is in pain."

"Yes, it is sore. You have been very vigorous, my love," she pushed his hand away from her intimate parts. "I am hungry. Ooh," she smiled feeling his yoki enter body. It flitted down to her soreness, relieving the tightness she felt until the muscles relaxed. "That's better."

"Eat," he pulled the tray up to her.

She heard a rumble from his stomach. "I am not the only one who is hungry." She dipped her fingers daringly into the bloody meat and removed a small piece. She picked it up between her thumb and index finger and passed it into his mouth. He licked the blood off her fingers until they were clean. Another sound came from his throat this time. She listened to it carefully. It was like a groan but not in pain, more of pleasure, but not the same sound she drew from his lips when they made love.

"And that one?" He asked her.

"You," she found another tender juicy piece of blood soaked meat for him. She raised it to his mouth, nibbling at her own food with her other hand while she fed him. "You want me to feed you again."

"You know this Sesshomaru well."

"I suppose I do. Harutoga can hear your words when you are in your true form," she said quietly, "is that because he is your son?"

"Yes," Sesshomaru answered her licking the last droplets of blood from her fingers. "His yoki interacts with mine. Yuki understands this Sesshomaru."

Rin frowned, "you converse with your mother and Natsuki in that form. I can't understand you."

He sighed, "you are jealous. There is no need to be. I remember," he wrapped his arms around her waist. He picked up her chopstick, "fish?" He waited for her to nod, then scooped up some of the flesh in the ornately designed white skewers, "I came home, in a very foul mood. My heart took my hand and in defiance of my wishes led this Sesshomaru to the hot springs. We did not speak, you bathed my skin. You massaged my shoulders. You rubbed my scalp until the anger was gone. We did not speak. You took this Sesshomaru to bed and spent time exploring my body. It was the first time I peaked before you." He picked up more fish and fed Rin. "Without words, you knew what I needed. We did not need sounds or words. That cannot be learned."

Rin smiled proudly, "I remember that day," she touched her mouth. It was the first time he had released in her mouth. It wasn't an entirely unpleasant experience but she hadn't expected him to do that. "It was just after Harutoga was born."

"You were ill," he reminded her.

"I was. I had a fever the day before you came home."

"You still wished to please me," he pulled her mouth to his. He held her lips against his, slowly lapping at the inside of her mouth.

She wrapped her arms around his stomach and hugged him tightly, "no one will ever know you as I do."

He shook his head almost sadly.

"You don't allow anyone as close as you do me. I don't mean just physically," she wrinkled her eyebrows together. "You don't speak to others. Your mother at times, and Jaken but not like you do with me."

"Words are difficult with others. I enjoy conversations with Yuki."

"She's your daughter. She loves talking to you. Did you ever have friends Sesshomaru? People you shared your heart with?"

"No," he answered quietly. "Perhaps when I was a child. As I matured, the nature of an Inu-yokai is to rule. Our friends become our enemies as we seek power. To gain power, you must battle those around you."

"You killed your friends?"

"They attacked first," he lifted up the ball of rice for Rin.

"Why didn't we take these lands? Your father's lands?" She asked Sesshomaru. "It's beautiful here."

He nibbled softly on her right shoulder and sighed into her skin, "I dislike diplomacy, treaties, meetings, alliances. Our home was destroyed the day Inuyasha was born. I chose not to defend it. Many assumed I would take my father's place as Lord of the West. I did not yearn for the lands. I yearned for power. Kensaku began his conquest of these lands a century after Chichiue died. I allowed it. I did not wish to rule over an empire."

"You do now," she rubbed the muscles along his stomach.

"It is not an empire. Our lands are minimal compared to the lands of the other four Lords. I took what was defendable."

"You do what you hate for us?" Rin smiled into his chest.

"Yes. Had we not become a family," he stroked the hair over her ear, "it would be unnecessary. Would you like a vacation home by the ocean?"

"Yes," she hugged him knowing with those words, he had somehow already arranged it.

"It has been arranged. Kensaku, to make up for his daughter's severe blunder," he noticed the confusion on Rin's face. "Kensaku is Natsuki's father."

"What!?" Rin sat up. She yelled louder than she had meant to.

"Part of our arrangement for peace was that she would become my mate after your death. However, I did not know about that arrangement. It was made by mother," he rolled his eyes frustrated that she had been pulling strings behind the scenes without telling him.

"I'm going to kill her," Rin said with conviction.

"You will not."

"Why not?" Rin pouted.

"Because she will kill you, forcing this Sesshomaru to kill her-"

"And she would kill you, making Natsuki try to kill her and then we would all be dead and the children would be raised by your manipulative well-meaning mother?"

He nodded and shrugged his shoulders.

"So she is stronger than you?"

Another annoyed rumble came from deep within his chest.

"That means yes."

He made the sound again.

"Yep, you are admitting your mother is stronger."

The rumble became louder.

"What are you going to do about it Sesshomaru?" She arched her eyebrows at him.

It increased in volume.

She grabbed him by the shoulders and shoved him back first onto the futon. She landed on top of him, straddling his lap, "now it's my turn." She grinned taking in his body. This was going to be fun. She wasn't going to tell him that she would keep track of how many noises she could get him to make. Ten years together and she knew how to please him very, very well.

**Warriormaiden60: **_Yes Gobodo-sama knows all about Instinct. That is why she was such a bitch to Rin for rejecting Sesshomaru. She refused to see the human aspect._


	28. Simple Conversation

**I always think of simple conversations the two would have. **

It wasn't just for nurturing their bond that Sesshomaru brought Rin to the villa in the lands that were once his father's. By the fourth night, a tired refrain occurred. Rin shivered against him like a leaf in the wind. Her body quivered, she moaned lightly. He knew that sound. He knew the smell wafting into his nostrils. Her fingers gripped the sheets so tightly that if she were a demon like him with claws they would be shredded. She was terrified. Her dreams were vivid, he knew that much from what he could gather from the sweat forming on her skin and the words that were barely audible. She was pleading with her unnamed assailant to stop, to get off of her. His eyes opened wide, when she flung herself forward this time, standing so abruptly it startled even him and bolted out of the villa into the pounding rain, complete naked. Before he could completely register what had happened he heard a thud and smelled her blood. He leapt from the futon, leaving behind the sun yellow blankets that covered them, and Taiyomaru in the basket next to them and ran to Rin.

Lightening scattered like spiderwebs in the black night sky. Thunder pounded into his ears. He found her with a twisted ankle, that had slid on the pristine smooth stones into an uncanny and very painful contortion. A gash dripped blood down her forehead. The opposite knee had landed on an upturned stone, tearing open the skin of her shin, leaking blood into the small stream that was forming between the ancient stones. The rest of her naked body had skid across the long exposed fattened roots of a camaphor sticking her with splinters. She groaned painfully.

Sesshomaru bent down and touched her ankle. She hissed in pain, sucking in her breath. "Don't touch it," she held a shaky hand down to the malformed appendage. Her delicate fingers touched the purpling skin. "Help me…"

He looked at her eyes. They were odd. That was all he could think of. They were not lit the way they normally were. "Help me," she cried again.

"Rin?" He wondered at her strange behavior.

"Save me," she whispered shuttering in the cold rain. Summer rains were often cold in this region. Her lips were already developing a line of blue around the edges.

He cursed quietly, lifting Rin off the slick, wet stones and carried her back into the villa. She mumbled in his arms and cried silently. She gripped his bare shoulders. He set her down on the futon, careful not to jostle the swollen ankle. He held her torso upright by her shoulders. He gave her a good shake, "wake up," he spoke to her. "My heart, wake up."

She grunted, then groaned, then jolted again trying to stand. The injured foot buckled beneath her. Her heart hit the tachycardic beat he knew was her awareness coming back to her. Her hands flew to her chest. She looked at herself, then at Sesshomaru, and at her ankle, "ow!" She screeched.

He quickly opened their bond to repair the damage to her bleeding leg, head and the clearly broken ankle. He forced it through as quickly as possible to spare her the pain of feeling the damage she had done to her body. The gash on her leg slowly closed, her ankle straightened itself, her head ceased bleeding and seemed as if the deep cut from falling had never been there. Rin stared at him, still in shock, "what happened? I…I don't know what happened?"

"A nightmare," he set her back onto the pillows. He touched the palms of her hands and shook his head annoyed. "These," he picked at a splinter with his claw, "my yoki cannot heal. You will sit still while I remove them." He held her left hand palm up and began picking at the splinters embedded in her hand. Many he found a loose end to pull, and with the splinters still fresh he was able to yank them out without trouble. Some were deeper into her skin, already webbing themselves into her tender flesh. Those required the tips of his claws to penetrate slightly deeper. He expected her to cry out in pain when he did only to find dead eyes staring back at him. "Tell me the dream?" It was half a demand, half a request. He had hoped their seclusion would banish some of her nightmares. He was used to them. Even before the healer when they fought a particularly nasty demon she would have nightmares afterwards for several weeks and then they would fade. They always faded. These would be the same. She just needed time.

She set her chin on her upraised knees. Her eyes still blank and lifeless. He found a splinter in her wrist that was particularly stubborn. He waited for her to react when removing it caused him to draw her blood. She didn't jolt, or complain. "The other hand now, this one is finished."

He inspected the next palm. She had not landed on this one. He returned to the other arm. There were more splinters in her shoulder and down her side. They were scattered from her breast down to her hip and a few in the skin of her knee. He scooted to her side, still naked himself and began picking them out of her side to start. "Does it hurt?" He tried to sense her emotions. Their connection was getting stronger. He could sense to some extent her disquiet. Embarrassment pervaded the emotions and guilt. "You cannot keep punishing yourself for what happened." He waited for a response. The eyes, the chocolate brown eyes that he knew and loved were still somewhere else. Rin's body was with him, but her mind was absent.

He poked her side to try to get her attention. Her body did not move. He poked it again a little harder, digging his claw in enough he knew it should have pinched. She moved ever so slightly away from the pressure before resuming her pose with chin in her knees. He growled annoyed and continued on removing the remaining splinters. She was covered in a fine layer of dirt. He touched her forehead, trying to elicit a reaction. He stroked her cheek. "Rin?" He nudged her neck with this his nose. He sighed again, displeased that she was not responding to him.

He picked up the bucket that was meant for washing and held it in one hand outside their door to gather the pounding rain water. He filled it brimming to the top then set it on the floor near the door where the floor naturally sloped downward to prevent water from entering the villa as well as let it drain. "I will wash you," he picked Rin up and carried her to the door. He sat with her in his lap. Her knees folded to her chin again, her hands lay placid at her side. "Are you in there?" He took a wash cloth, wetted it in the cold water, wrung it out and ran the wet cloth over her tanning skin. He scrubbed the mud from her face, circling in smooth motions down the sides of her neck and over her shoulders. He spent extra time ensuring that he had removed all the splinters from her body as he cleaned the side that had smashed into the trunk. "Lay your head in my lap."

Her gorgeous black hair was matted in mud and riddled with twigs and leaves. He helped her laydown on back. Her head found its way into his lap, resting on his hips. Her gaze shifted away from his body towards the wall. He began by removing the leaves and twigs that had latched themselves into her tresses. One by one, he picked them out, combing her hair with his claws as he did. He brought the bucket closer and tenderly wet her hair. He scrubbed the mud off the side of her face, and removed the clumps from her hair until it returned to its smooth, stringy black form. When he was finished he wrung the ends of her hair out and helped her sit up again. "Where are you my heart? Are you in the forest?" He turned her chin to his. When he touched her face, he nearly bit his own tongue. A fever was coming. "Did you get so cold?" Humans were such fragile creatures. He picked up his speechless lover and carried her into their bed. He covered her quickly, and curled against her heating skin. He looped his mokomoko around both of them and whispered in her ear, "if you don't want to speak, that's fine."

A slow smile spread across her lips just as they began to tremble. A sheen of red spread across her cheeks and the glow of fever overtook her. Her teeth chattered, "cold," she finally whispered a one word sentence that melted his worry.

"Come closer," he ran his hand down the dip of her naked back taking a trail of sweat with him, and pushed her body closer to his. She was curled into his bare shoulder. He wrapped his mokomoko around her waist and twisted it around her feet until she was covered completely.

"Closer," she cried against him. Her hand touched her right shoulder. "Take it away," she muttered. "Please?"

He leaned his neck and sunk his teeth in her skin. This time he drew the slightest drop of blood he flicked off with his tongue. Curiously he wondered if some of his wayward brother's yoki had managed to leech itself into her body. He let his own demonic power reach into her. It searched up and down her body looking for a foreign strength that did not belong and did not find it. She smelled of guilt and embarrassment still. "What is it?" He ran his thumb along the bone of her chin up to her cheek bone. His lips remained inches from hers as he held her shivering body in a close embrace, "tell this Sesshomaru how to help you."

"Take it away," she plead with him again. "All of it."

"All of what?" He didn't know what she was asking.

She coughed into his chest, half from tears and half from whatever virus was making a home within her body. He had avoided using his yoki to calm her in the last few weeks, to comfort her, but this time he knew it would be necessary as she seemed unable to on her own. He reached out to his connection, embedded in her heart. He let waves of comfort spread throughout her body until she seemed to breathe easier. He stroked her cheek again, "is that better?"

"You can't take it," the words came out hoarsely. She sneezed against his chest. "You can't take it."

He rest his forehead against hers, "tell me what it is."

"I'm embarrassed," tears withered down the corners of her eyes painting cruel rivers across red cheeks.

"Of what?" He kept his voice low, sensing a pain forming in her head. There was only so much his yoki could do. She had fallen ill while they travelled during the summer and fall before she became pregnant. He had attempted to heal her using his yoki to no avail. He was frustrated he could heal physical injuries but illness alluded him. He made a mental note to ask the Miko to bring him material to read about how the human body heals from viruses with the hopes that he could learn to control that portion of Rin's body as well.

"I tried to love someone else…he tricked me," she coughed against him, rasping at the end. "I didn't know until it was too late. How could you not know it was him? You met him."

"He was masking his scent and the spray from the ocean, the constant wet environment. It's why there are few dog demons in the south. It blights our senses. Is that not why you chose that place as your hiding spot?" He didn't mean for the last words to come out so harshly.

"Forgive me."

"I already have."

"How can you be so smug?"

"Where did you go just now?" He avoided the answering. He wiped the sweat dripping from her burning brow.

"The forest, you didn't come. You were with her, laughing at me," she coughed burying her head in his neck. "With her," she coughed again.

"Do you remember how this Sesshomaru found you?" He waited for her to answer. When silence came, he nuzzled her nose affectionately, "I found you, running to find our children. Injured, bleeding, weak in body. But so strong in spirit. I held you, do you remember?"

"Yes," she sniffled, "you found me again. You came for me."

"My warrior," he kissed her mouth, "this Sesshomaru is yours. You will not share me." He embraced her lips so sweetly, so tenderly, and with so much passion. "Mine. Are you thirsty?" He asked her.

She nodded against him. He leaned over her and picked up the wooden water bottle. He helped Rin sit up, the yellow blanket fell from her chest revealing a sweaty body that he still found attractive, even when it carried the stench of illness. He held the bottle to her mouth as she took slow and steady gulps. She wiped her mouth and lay back down. He took his place next to her, pulling her back into his embrace. "Can you forgive yourself?" He asked her.

"Forgive myself?"

He nodded running his nose along hers as he did, "forgive yourself my heart. It was not your fault he took advantage of the heart this Sesshomaru broke." He let his lips fall on hers. They burned as they touched not from passion but from the sheer heat of her body.

"You don't feel guilty for what you did?"

"I did."

"You don't," she broke into another coughing fit, "now?"

"It cannot be changed. Why indulge in guilt?"

"Why can't you find a way to break it?"

"Honor," he knew what she meant. "It is dishonorable for an inu-yokai to abandon his mate no matter how the bonding happened. Or who it hurt. It is even more dishonorable to abandon one's child. Would you have me send an assassin to take her life knowing that Tsukimaru would one day find out? Imagine the hatred that would spawn between he and our children. It would be worse than Inuyasha and I." He turned onto his back half taking Rin with him. "Perhaps we should discuss what happened again. Your mind is still there."

"I guess it is," she sighed quietly. "It was a very vivid dream."

He nodded his head. She ran stark naked from the villa, it would have to be.

"It didn't help," she whispered her lips brushing against the side of his pec she did. She scooted higher on his chest until her head rest against his chest near his chin. The arm she wrapped around his waist was quickly caught by one of his hands that caressed it from the wrist up to the elbow then back down. "I don't understand how your mind can leave it so quickly and isn't affected by what happened between us."

He softly chuckled, "you think this Sesshomaru brought you here because he was unaffected?"

Rin thought about his words for several minutes. She let them play through her head. "You brought me here to be close to me? Because you were away from me for so long," she understood that much. "I don't understand."

He sighed against her skin, "the nights were long and lonely. The house was quiet. In the past I would have found pleasure in those things. Quiet, solitude. Ten years we have spent our days and nights together. My arms were empty," if she didn't know any better she would have said he sounded mournful. "I am also much older than you and know how fleeting these thoughts are. They pass in time. For now we are together again. My heart and my arms are full. That is all that matters. You really think it would have been different for you had you married a human?" He pressed his mouth into her forehead, "your skin is so hot."

"I think I wasn't feeling well earlier. That's why I went to sleep earlier."

"You did not go to sleep earlier," he snorted, "you fell asleep after our last session and did not wake for dinner until you ran out of the villa naked and fell."

"Sorry," she whispered with a smile on her face. She kissed his pec, then his neck. "Having more than one wife only happens in wealthier circles. I know about the pleasure districts. I think Kaede's village and our village are probably the only ones that don't have one. Kaede wouldn't allow it and when Kagome-sama came back, let's just say she brought some ideas from her time."

"Ideas?" The way she said it peaked his curiosity.

"Ideas similar to what you do to me. Men in her time, sex has become more for gratification than it has for creating children. Here, men take wives to have children and if they want pleasure they go to the pleasure districts. Women are taught to lay on the bridal chamber bed with their legs open and accept what the man gives them. Kagome-sama taught Inuyasha."

"The Hanyou was a virgin?" His chest was practically thrumming with laughter.

"Can you blame him?" She pinched his neck. He growled at her removing her fingers from his throat. "You told me before a hanyou reaches sexual maturity around 130 or 150 years, so he had just reached sexual maturity when he met Kikyo. You know she would not have allowed him to touch her intimately until they were married and he was sealed to a tree before they could. So yes, he and Kagome-sama were both virgins."

He was still humming with laughter behind her. "It must have been a clumsy venture, no wonder he came to this Sesshomaru."

"You are so," she broke into another coughing fit against his chest, "mean. He came to you?"

"After their first pairing. He smelled lightly of her first blood. He said he felt something boiling in him that felt unsatisfied and was unsure how to quiet it. It was over whelming his senses."

"The urge to bond," Rin said knowingly. "He made love to her without bonding her the first time."

Sesshomaru inclined his head. "Bonding is very delicate. When an Inu-Yokai male bonds a female, even a human, he must ensure that she has reached her peak before he does. It shows respect and love to care for her needs. Only after that, as the male reaches his can the bond be created. He did not know that. We spoke of how to create the bond, to control his yoki and that she would have to avoid the urge to purge it. Then I explained to him, what a female peak feels like."

"Orgasm," Rin chuckled covering her mouth. "Kagome-sama said the real term in her time is an orgasm. Men reach it when they put their seed in the woman."

"Strange word," Sesshomaru said uncomfortably.

"You know it so well?" Rin giggled at him.

"Let's see," his tone bubbled flirtatiously. "You moan, but it's not a normal, one it starts out loud and then is followed by lower ones. Your opening tenses just before. It becomes hard against my fingers, your bud grows against my tongue, and your walls pulse against my fingers. You are too sick," he tickled her chin.

"You do know how to satisfy me." She yawned sleepily. Her eyes tracked to the window, "the sun is going to rise soon."

He looked at the crisp shades of gold beginning to streak the horizon. The sky was fading from black to grey. "Taiyomaru will wake soon," he pulled her mouth up to his. "Sleep. The Hanyou taught the village to pleasure their wives?" He was laughing again.

"No. Kagome-sama taught him. He told Miroku, who had no idea which is hilarious, then he told his friend and his friend. Somehow it got to the village elders who called a meeting with all the men. Men being men, they found the idea of enjoying sex with their wives more appealing than allowing a pleasure district. I think Kohaku over heard it at some point." She had a hand over her mouth.

"I do not wish to hear about him," he tickled her cheek and wiped her nose with his knuckle. "He cannot make you cry in pleasure as I do."

"No," she kissed his mouth. The kiss became heated despite the fever.

Sesshomaru pulled back, feeling himself harden with the contact of their bodies together. "Not now, rest. Your nose is running, you're coughing."

"It won't go away overnight."

"When the fever breaks."

"We'll lose time together," she reminded him.

He rest his forehead against hers turning on his side again, "no. My time with you is not just about this," he ran one finger over the tip of her hardened nipple. "It's about this," he pulled her hand to the scar over his heart and opened their bond to feel his content, his warmth.

"You're happy," Rin grinned against his chest. She could feel it warming her own soul. He was content, at home in her arms.

"Immensely." He pulled the blanket over her shoulder.

She ran a finger over his collar bone and said sleepily, "at night. I cried for you. His company was pleasing during the day. At night I missed you."

"I know," he pressed his lips into hers again, licking the roof of her mouth tenderly. "I know," he wiped a tear that fell from her cheek.

"You were there weren't you? I…" she paused thinking back to the nights she would spend on the beach crying. "It was like a whisper, a kiss from the wind on my arms. It felt like your presence was there, holding me. Begging forgiveness."

"I was with you on the beach, but not in this form." He stroked sweat soaked hair from her brow. "I held you as you cried. I wished for forgiveness."

"It's not fair you are made this way." She curled in tighter. "Where you can't resist. You don't get to choose."

"If we weren't, our kind would have disappeared from the earth. To preserve our lines, we are made to fall to our baser desires. It is uncontrollable for a purpose."

"To create children," Rin snorted this time then coughed again. "So you are a product of blind passion?"

"I am a product of a female in heat and the nearest male satisfying her urges," the words brought laughter to his lips again.

"Heat? You mean like animals?"

"Mother was in heat, that is what she meant by her itch. It's very painful for inu-yokai females from what I have been told," he felt an elbow in his side, "and seen. Yasuko, was in heat. However I had not yet reached maturity which is why she did not become pregnant." He felt an elbow again, "and because I was not interested in hearing it from my father."

"Will Yuki go into heat? Or cycle like I do?"

"We should speak to Akari. I believe she will go into a period of heat where her body will be fertile when she is older. She will be in pain until the urge is satisfied."

"We will protect her from it being any random male," Rin said firmly.

"Then we should begin searching for her mate now," Sesshomaru spoke firmly. "It will take us that long to find a pure-blooded suitor for her."

"You think that is what will happen?"

"She has no soft spot in her heart for humanity, and my kind will not accept her. I will begin my search when we return home."

"Who raised you?"

"Mother kept me until sometimes after I was weaned. Chichiue visited often as I visit Tsukimaru. When I was just over a century and a half, he took me from her home and brought me here, to the Western Lands. Here I was stayed until I was just over three hundred and fifty years. Her visits were infrequent."

"You spent all that time alone?"

"I did not require companions."

"Jaken," she reminded him.

"Jaken, came eighty years before I met you. He has been with this Sesshomaru for a century."

"No wonder you thought love was for the weak. You were raised by two emotionally distant parents."

"They did not love each other. They respected each other," he said quietly, "it is different raising our children. My love for you, it calms Yuki's wild spirit."

"She's like you," Rin giggled, "Harutoga is more like me."

Rin sighed, her body feeling heavier with sleep. "He's going to wake soon."

"Turn on your other side," Sesshomaru helped push Rin over. He rubbed her back when she began coughing again. "I will help him nurse when he wakes. Sleep."

Rin let her eyes closed exhausted, still shivering from the fever. "Make sure he doesn't bite me. That will wake me up."

He kissed her cheek bone smiling against the skin as he did. "Sleep, my heart."

**Now I am tempted to write Inuyasha and Kagome's first Lemon together. If you want me to leave a review :).**

**And seriously don't make me lecture about reviews again. I love reviews. They brighten my day. I think I am slowly building this up to when the disease will come...I have a slow building plot line going for that and hope to turn it into a story. (I so wish I could be a fluff writer but I'm not sorry).**

**So please review. The only way to keep the Sess/Rin alive is to follow, review and favorite. We are a dying breed **


	29. Time in the Villa

**I am enjoying their time in the villa love nest. Beware of Lemons. They tend to get squishy. For everyone that asked for Inuyasha and Kagome's first time I will write it soon. I need to watch the end of Final Act to get inspiration. **

Sesshomaru held Rin while she slept. Her body steadily shivered against his, heated with fever. Every so often her body quaked in a coughing fit against his chest. He rubbed her back soothingly until the fit stopped. Her back was pressed into his chest. He wrapped his mokomoko around her front to keep her warm, even though the night air was quickly losing its chill. He kissed her cheek bone, willing her body to cool. He tried to not to worry when he saw Rin like this but it was difficult not to. In his travels he had seen illnesses that seemed so benign, so simple, take the lives of entire villages. Their village was rather safe behind its barrier. Neither human nor demon could enter without first swearing a binding oath of no harm to him or his family. It meant those that were sick were not in. All trading was done outside the barrier. Peddlers were not allowed inside. The risk was too high.

He reached across Rin and picked up the wash cloth that was draped over the edge of the wooden bucket. He dipped it in the chilled water and ran it along Rin's shoulders and neck. She whimpered lightly at the contact her skin bubbling in goosebumps. "Shh," he simpered in her ear, "it's just me." He rubbed her cheek with the back of his finger. In front of her Taiyomaru was stirring in his basket. Little clawed hands reached out the furs he was covered in. His tiny voice grunts filled the quiet villa with small sounds. Sesshomaru scooped his pudgy son out of the basket with one hand and nestled him next to Rin's stomach. Taiyomaru found his target quickly. "Do not bite Ka-san," he warned the baby jokingly. As if a five month old infant would understand a command like that. The child wrapped his arms around his mother's generous breast and slowly suckled the warm milk within.

Sesshomaru felt a warmth spreading in his chest at the sight of the woman he loved snuggled into the trunk of his body and the child they had created, happily nursing at her breast. Perchance he had taken moments like these for granted in the time before they were separated. He felt a possessiveness overtake him. He bent his neck down over her cheek and placed a quiet warm kiss on her cooling skin. "My heart, do not leave this Sesshomaru again. Not in life, or in death." He did not like her mortality. As he held Rin, he wished that he could keep her alive longer than the short span of time he would have with her. He wished he would have taken her at fourteen or fifteen instead of waiting until she was seventeen. They could have had two more years together. He cursed his instincts for the four months he lost with her. He grit his teeth allowing himself one last moment of guilt for the time he had lost with her. He sighed against her skin while his son ate. He nuzzled beneath her chin lightly, careful not to stir her. Her skin was finally cooling.

Taiyomaru popped off her breast with a trail of milk sliding down his dimpled chin as he babbled to his father waving his hands. Sesshomaru tickled the baby's chin with a smile of his own twitching against his placid cheeks. He rose out of the bed, wrapping Rin in the yellow sheet and a forest green blanket for warmth. He pulled his plain white hikama on and a clean black kimono. He tied his obi, put his katanas in the belt and picked up Taiyomaru. He snuggled the infant against his shoulder. He exited the villa, glancing over his shoulder hoping that Rin remained asleep.

Jaken ran from the trees the moment Sesshomaru left the villa with the baby in his arms. "Sesshomaru-sama!" He called bowing low.

Sesshomaru stopped walking just as Jaken got to his feet. From high in one of the tall trees that spread over the courtyard Sesshomaru nodded at Hisato who sat with one knee upraised, the other hanging. His head leaned back against the trunk of the tree.

"Shall I bring breakfast?" Jaken asked.

"Send meat for Taiyomaru to Bukoseno. Bring soup for Rin. She is ill," he said as he began the walk towards ancient magnolia. Besides himself, the old tree seemed to be the only other one who was able to keep Taiyomaru quiet.

"I will have Atsuko make her a soup and bring it right away. Er…Sesshomaru-sama, how is she?" Jaken kept his head low as he asked.

Sesshomaru scoffed. If it wasn't that Jaken had known Rin since she was a little girl, he would punish him for his intrusion into their personal life. The imp had become inconsolably forlorn while Rin was missing. "Better," he resumed walking towards Bukoseno.

"Er…the eh dreams, Sesshomaru-sama?" Jaken inquired quietly.

"Less," Sesshomaru answered truthfully. The dream the night before had been the first in the week since he had brought her to the villa.

"I'll return to the servants camp," Jaken bowed low and ran off into the forest. Sesshomaru had not told Rin that after she woke agitated in the middle of the night he had rounded up a small handful of his servants to prepare the villa. Akari guarded Rin until he arrived. Atsuko brought her husband and children and made a camp deep in the forest, equipped with a kitchen to care for Rin's needs and a flowing stream to provide her with clean clothes. They brought her favorite foods from the community garden that was finally beginning to bloom. Hisato remained near in the forest to watch Rin while Sesshomaru took Taiyomaru to Bukoseno. Jaken was the mystery servant who managed to slip in and out of their villa refilling the fruit bowl and dropping off their meals unnoticed. Any other demon in the area would have set off Rin's senses. Any other demon would meet the deadly end of Sesshomaru's whip for walking into the villa while they slept naked in each other's arms. Jaken was the only one he trusted not to look at Rin. He knew by human standards she was beautiful. By his standards she was divine.

He flew through the forest, sensing Rin beginning to stir. He didn't want her to wake alone. He landed in front of the elderly tree with his son in hand. "Look at this little one," Bukoseno's leaves trembled as he plucked the child from Sesshomaru's arms. Taiyomaru warbled and blew spit bubbles at the elderly tree. "He has so much to say."

"I'll return for him in a few hours," Sesshomaru disappeared into a ball of light. She was calling him in her own way. Her sensuous smell was wafting into his nostrils even from that distance. He landed outside the villa dismissing Hisato with a nod of his head. The other demon flew off. From outside the door of the villa, he heard soft pleasurable moans. His eyebrows furrowed in humor. _What are you dreaming about my heart. _He opened the door silently, careful to avoid the scraping of the stone or the creaking of the hinges. He found his naked lover on her other side. Her skin was covered in a light sheen of sweat. She moaned again. He smiled removing his clothing until he was naked and slid into bed behind her. He ran his fingers down her bare shoulder. Her hand gripped the bottom sheet. He heard her whisper his name. _Are you dreaming about this Sesshomaru? _He kissed her sleeping neck, licking the pulse that beat against his tongue. He ran his hand over her hips and across her stomach. He thought for a moment that he should not touch her like this as she slept, but she seemed so desperate and needy, like she couldn't get where she wanted to go. She clutched the sheet, her nails digging into the bed. Her hips rocked lightly back and forth making his mouth water. He wondered what he was doing to her in her dream. She smelled like a hot summer morning, like she was burning. He was sure if he touched her delicate curls they would be moist with arousal. The thought made him thicken.

He let one hand trail under the sheet to her cavern. He cupped her sex tenderly dipping his middle finger so it brushed across a swollen bud and tenderly circled her opening. "Mmmh," she gripped the sheets tighter. She was wet, pleading for release in her sleep. Her walls were tight, her breath coming out in gasps.

A coy smile crossed his lips. _Who am I to deny what you need? _He moved himself closer to her so she was pressed against his torso. He carefully pulled back one of her legs so he could have better access to her opening. He gingerly rubbed his middle and ring finger forward and back over her swollen clit, circling it gently. Her moans increased, "is this what you need?" He kissed her mouth. Her hips rocked against his fingers. He felt himself harden. He had made love to her once in her sleep while she was under the Healer's spell. He would not do it now. But her full breasts pointing at his face, her clenching opening and the way her hips followed the rhythm of his fingers brought a sheen of white liquid to his firm erection. Her eyes fluttered in her sleep. He could hardly take her scent and the feel of her moisture any longer. He wanted Rin to wake up. "Wake up Rin," he nuzzled her neck, still massaging her.

"Mmh," she answered him, "oh," her hand found his, pushing it lower. He slid his fingers inside of her.

"Wake up," he nibbled on her shoulder letting his fangs lightly graze her skin.

"Oh," she whined gripping his wrist. Her eyes finally opened, "my love," she was already panting. "What are you doing?"

"Were you dreaming of me?" He whispered richly in her ear, "dreaming of this," his fingers danced over her bud.

"Yes," she rolled over to face him. She wrapped one leg over his hip. His fingers slid deeper inside her cavern pumping slowly, back and forth sliding in and out. She covered her mouth to stifle a cough, "my love," she pulled his mouth to hers. For a brief moment their lips met before she pushed his face back. "I can't breathe through my nose. Oh…it feels so good."

"Then my mouth will find other places to kiss," his thumb eased itself against her clit. His lips fell on the curve of her necks sucking on the skin. He tugged on her skin until goosebumps formed. His freehand pressed her stomach into his chest. He kissed his way down the center of her neck. She tilted her head back giving him better access. He licked down the center of her chest. She arched her back into his mouth. Then he felt her hands, her strong fingers wrap around his hardened erection. He growled at the contact. Her fingers circled the tip collecting the liquid and sliding it down his hardened length. His breathing picked up as they pleasure each other.

"Lay on your back," she whispered seductively.

"You have not finished," he enveloped one of her breasts in his mouth. He sped up his ministrations against her clit.

"Ahh, mmh," she panted holding him.

"Rin…" he groaned, her hand met his pace. He caught her by the wrist and shook his head. She had lit a fire in his belly. He stopped her, any more and he would have exploded on her stomach.

"On your back," she traced the line of his jaw, kissing him firmly. "Now."

Sesshomaru laughed lightly, "you presume to be dominant?"

"On your back," she pushed herself up.

"On my lap. With your back to my chest," he helped her up. She raised her sweaty body over his. She knelt down facing away from him. He grasped himself holding her around the stomach with one hand to guide her down. "Come down, yes…mmh like that." He clenched his teeth to keep from releasing as her wet, hot, core slid over him.

"Oh, you're so deep," she pushed herself back up and slid down on him again.

He panted against her ear holding himself back. He reached one arm around her front and found her center of pleasure. His fingers vibrated against it. Her back arched against his chest. He held her breasts with her other hand, "yes, Rin!" He felt himself coming unglued. He opened their bond reveling in her love for him. He pushed his warmth inside of her. She bucked her hips against him, taking in his full length.

"Sesshomaru!" She screamed in release, "oh," she ran her hands through his hair.

He roared as his own came the moment he felt her clenching against him. She collapsed against his chest in a fit of coughs. She covered her mouth twisting to the side. He eased her back onto the futon. She snuggled her nose into his chest. He met her on his side. "Just couldn't resist could you?" She laughed while reaching for a cloth to wipe her nose.

"No," he cupped her chin and kissed her mouth. "Better dreams?"

"You are very good in my dreams," she giggled against him. "But that was even better." She kissed the skin between his pecs.

"Your fever is gone," he ran his fingers through Rin's hair. "You're still ill."

"It's just a cold," she sneezed against his chest, splattering his skin with her saliva. "Sorry," she flushed.

He only kissed her in response. He rest his forehead against hers, it was nearly mid-morning. Her stomach released a ferocious growl. "Breakfast will come soon," he told her. "Rin," he had been avoiding having this conversation. It always seemed to stress her when they had in the past. "When our time here is over, I will need a week to inspect our borders."

"Really?" She whined. Her head flopped against his chest, "why?"

"It is time, we change our original agreement," he tickled her chin out of its hiding place so he could see her eyes. "I require one day a week to visit Tsukimaru and the southern border is more stable than it was in the past."

"Why do I get the feeling you already know which schedule you want and you are only asking me for permission?"

"Three weeks home, one week away," he kissed her forehead. "One day of each week I will spend in mother's castle with my son."

"I hate when you are gone a whole week," she pouted against his chest. "But you've never been able to be home for weeks before. What do you mean by a whole day in the castle?"

"The journey is roughly six or seven hours to mother's castle," he pulled her closer knowing that any mention of the child created with Natsuki would distress her. "I wish to spend several hours with my son. He should know who his father is. Then I will return. I will leave in the morning after I have eaten the morning meal with you and our children and return late in the night."

"You're going to be tempted aren't you?" Rin turned her back to his chest. He closed the space between them until their bodies were wrapped together like two halves of the same whole. Her feet slithered between his for warmth.

"No. I will not see her. Mother or one of the servants will bring my son to me. Mother has been teaching her how to keep her emotions and yoki inward. Unless her life is in danger I will not sense her or be drawn to her." He wiped a wandering tear from Rin's eyes. He touched her forehead testing to see if the fever had returned.

"Okay," she said quietly. "Taiyomaru is going to cry the entire week you are gone," she coughed into the pillows.

"I know. Perhaps we will find something that smells strongly of this Sesshomaru to comfort him while I am away."

"Can you stay home for a few days before you go? Yuki and Harutoga miss you," she asked hopefully.

"I will stay one day after we return. Father once said, the fastest way for the borders to fall is to trust them to others. My sentries and allies could feed this Sesshomaru false information. I must see for myself to ensure our safety," he held her hand in his. "We have two more days together."

"Can we do this again sometime?" Rin smiled into his neck. She nipped at his skin firmly.

"You still do not bite hard enough," he clamped on her shoulder, pricking her skin. She bit down harder on the soft skin of his neck, "that is better." He picked her chin up and laced her lips with his. "You enjoy this time together?"

"Yes," she whispered. "My throat hurts," she mumbled into his neck. "I love you Sesshomaru."

"And I you," he tickled her neck. "Shall I attempt to relieve the pain?"

"It's alright. The cold will go away," she held his hand under breasts in hers. "So three weeks home and one week away, but one day a week you will be gone."

"You may choose the day," he kissed her neck.

"I think I can manage that. I've been thinking, Hisato is strong, but when it comes to enemies like Touma. He really did try. He can't fight pure blooded inu-yokai. Perhaps we should find one that we can trust not to attempt to overthrow you," he intertwined her fingers between his. She heard a growl from behind her.

"I take the ones with tainted blood specifically because they would not think to attempt to overpower this Sesshomaru," he considered her words. "Perhaps you are correct that one or two should be stronger than he."

"Is he stronger than Sato?"

"Immensely. He was overpowered by the two in their true-form in the battle against Touma. I will consider this," he rubbed the side of her stomach.

"We need someone who can transform," she sighed into his skin. "Where is Taiyomaru?"

"With Bukoseno."

"This is unfair…he screams for me. He screams for Jaken. He screams for Yuki half the time, and with a demon-tree and you he is quiet."

Sesshomaru's chest rumbled from behind her, "he is quiet when he is on your breast."

"So is his father," she elbowed him.

"Yes his father is," toyed with one of her nipples. "Such sumptuous breasts," he leaned her onto her back and slowly licked the tip of her nipple. "Would you like to make love again?"

"I would like to eat," she laughed at Sesshomaru.

"Soon," he sniffed the air. "It's coming." Rin tried in vain to get up. Sesshomaru pulled her back down by the waist. "We are in seclusion. I will know when the tray has arrived."

"Shouldn't I at least get to see who this mystery servant is?" She raised an eyebrow at him.

"No," he rolled her onto her back holding her arms over her head, "we are in seclusion."

"So you get to leave the villa and I don't?"

"Where would you like to go?" He kissed her lips, trailing the kiss down her neck where he knew she liked it. He nudged her neck to the side and licked just underneath her chin where the skin was the most sensitive.

"The river to bathe," she whispered trying to catch her breath. His mouth was hovering over one of her nipples. "Sesshomaru…" She coughed.

He pulled back with a satisfied grin on his face. "I bathed you last night."

"I smell like you."

"This is a problem?"

"Even you smell sometimes."

He sniffed one shoulder than the other. "If I smell, it is your smell."

"I do not stink!" Rin shrieked at him.

"Your nose is stuffed, how would you know?"

"I'm going to hurt you," she tried to push him onto his back. She landed flat on hers with her wrists pinned to her sides. "You're the one that stinks! You haven't washed yourself since we came here!" She tried kicking his stomach only for his knee to gently come down on top of her legs. She stuck her tongue out at him.

He licked the tip of her tongue playfully. "Then we will go to the river, if it will make you happy. You will remain naked."

"What if someone sees us?"

"We are in seclusion."

"With a magical servant who drops off food," she wiggled in his grasp. She growled and flopped onto the mattress, "I yield."

He released her.

Rin sat up with her knees up and exhausted look on her face.

"You are still tired," he informed her as if she didn't know.

"You have never been sick, it makes sleep less restful."

"Perhaps I will have a proper bath drawn for you," Sesshomaru contemplated. He didn't like the idea of her being washed in cold river water. "The bath houses are in ruins, but can be filled and heated. I will return shortly. Remain here. The food has come."

Rin bolted for the door to try to discover the mystery servant. Sesshomaru caught her again trying to suppress the grin itching at the corner of his mouth. "Remain here," he said again firmly. Rin sat down folding her arms over her breasts pouting.

Sesshomaru pulled his hikama back on. He opened the door to the villa and pulled the tray in. Steam rose off a large bowl of soup. Rin coughed into her elbow making a raucous. Sesshomaru glanced at her softly setting the tray in front of her.

"The magical servant knows I am sick?"

He shrugged his shoulders. "Remain here, unclothed," he arched his eyebrow at her.

"Why do you get to get dressed?"

"Would you prefer I parade in front of the female servants naked?"

"So the mystery servant is a female? We both know you have no problem showing off."

He knelt down and kissed Rin's mouth firmly. "It is you I love. Do not attempt to escape. I can sense your mischievous thoughts. You need to rest." He left the villa.

Rin sat down with the tray of food. She slowly sipped the satisfying bone broth. It was cooked heavily in garlic and mint. She drank from the wooden water bottle then decided to see if she could sneak out of the villa. She knew he could easily find her but it didn't mean she wasn't up for a good game of hide and seek. She blew her nose on one of Taiyomaru's clean diapers and tucked the cloth into her sleeve. "Okay, my love. Let's see how long it takes for you to find me." She giggled as she ran from the villa.

**Anyone want to make any guesses where he is going to find her, or how long it will take?**

**Please read and Review :) I will get to Inuyasha and Kagome's first Lemon. It will be fun and cute. I can just imagine Kagome being super shy and super flirty LOL. **

**Kimmigirl9: **_I love their conversations. I like giving them real life moments together that most couples would have. _

**Consistentguest:** _Oh yes I am still happily drabbling! I have written an entire outline for the The Disease. I think that is what I am going to call it. It's possible in the future i will begin writing the story of how the disease came and wiped out the majority of the demons. _


	30. Rival Lover

**Estherale247 this one is for you. It's my comical version of a rival lover coming to try to steal Rin from Sesshomaru. AHHH I just got a ton of requests for these drabbles so here are a few responses to those requests.**

**Inuyasha/Kagome's Lemons- These drabbles are really meant for Sesshomaru and Rin. So I have made another collection of Drabbles for Inu/Kag.**

**Future Sesshomaru- You will see more of future Sesshomaru in Inu-Kag Drabbles. It doesn't make sense for me to write them in here yet. **

**Reincarnation story- I started coming up with something. It could half fit into Inu/Kag drabbles but I want that to be more about them than Sess/Rin so it will be separated. **

**Alas I think I am channeling my inner sick energy right now. My whole house has been down with a virus this week and I feel like crap. Instead of being a good house-wife I am writing.**

*********open poll****** I am very curious if my readers are members of FF or guests. At the top of my profile page please vote. Are you a member or a guest? I want to know! Results will be used to satisfy my nagging curiosity.**

**Rival Lover**

Rin giggled as she made her way out of the villa. She knew where the river was. Her head lightly hurt and every so often she had to stop to catch her breath and cough her lungs up leaning on the rich trunks of the ancient trees of the forest. The virus would be the end of her. She wouldn't be able to be quiet enough to avoid his sensitive ears. If she at least got to the river she could hide her scent and he would be forced to rely on their bond to find her. She enjoyed the previous five days in the villa but she was also getting antsy stuck in one place for so long. The Villa was smaller than the hut the village built for her, before she moved with Sesshomaru to their home. She wanted to see more than the four stone walls. She imagined what his reaction would be when he got back and found her missing. She hoped he would be as happy to play a game they once played often. Maybe he already knew she was gone? Rin wasn't sure how strong the connection between them was. She leapt over a log landing lightly on her bare feet. Even sick she could stalk quietly. If she was honest with herself, playing a good game of chase with Sesshomaru made her hot and bothered despite how sick she felt. She stopped and leaned against a tree, breaking out in a light sweat. She closed her eyes catching her breath and then bolted as fast as she could to the sound of rushing water, thundering in the distance.

Suddenly she smacked into something hard and landed on her back sliding into some dead leaves. The figure she collided into was slightly marred by the light of the sun. She held her hand up to block the light. Through the rays blinding her she could see the faintest sheen of silver hair. "How did you find me so quickly?" _Not fair. _She pouted to herself.

"I was not looking for you human," the figure said lightly. It sniffed the air, "what is the wonderful aroma you are giving off? You have beautiful legs," the figure moved closer to her.

"Shit," Rin cursed under her breath, not recognizing the voice or the feel of the yoki. She stood up quickly closing yukata so it covered her better. She raised her hand out to the side calling her katana from the villa. She could feel the yoki pulsing in her hand.

"Interesting reaction," the figure moved out of the sun. Rin could finally make him out. The hair was jet black not white. He had double stripes over his cheekbones and wrists. He wore a forest green haori with matching hikama. He had two swords strapped behind his back. His mokomoko was double looped over his shoulder's similar to the way Hisato wore his. He bowed to Rin, "we don't often see humans in this area." He circled her, eyes on his prey.

"I'm just visiting," she kept her arm outstretched. _Hurry up. _

"Would you like a tour?" The demon raised an eyebrow at her, while offering his hand.

"A tour?" Rin asked confused. Her katana finally made it into her hand. It glowed green in her palm. She backed away from the strange demon.

"What a lovely trick. Has anyone ever told you how beautiful you are?" He was suddenly only a hand breadth away from Rin. He leaned his neck down and sniffed hers. "Mmmh, your smell is intoxicating."

"Eww," Rin pushed him backwards, "who are you?"

"Katsumoto," Hisato leapt down from the trees landing lithely next to Rin. "I suggest you find another human to woo."

"Why?" Katsumoto plucked leaves from Rin's hair and cupped her chin, "this one smells enticing. I believe she yearns for me."

"Not you. The one that will come looking for her," Hisato pushed the other demon backwards. "Keep your hands to yourself."

"What are you doing here?" Rin balked at Hisato.

"What am I always doing behind your back Rin-sama?" Hisato laughed, "did you think he would leave you alone?"

"I'm going to kill him," Rin kept her sword at the ready. "Okay, Katsumoto…get your hands out of my hair." She slapped at the hands in her tresses.

"Such soft strands," the demon ran his claws through her black hair admiring the length and luscious thickness.

Hisato pushed Rin behind him, blocking her from Katsumoto's grasp, "because you are my cousin, I will give you this chance to leave. When her lover comes, he will not be pleased to see you pawing what is his."

"She has a lover?" The demon paced back and forth as if he was in deep thought. His hands pressed together, his lips pressed against his index fingers. "So you belong to the Dog Lord Sesshomaru? I thought he bound another? Aren't humans sensitive about these kinds of things?"

"He's your cousin?" Rin asked Hisato trying to sneak a look from behind the Inu-yokai's broad shoulders. "So he's like you?"

"Please, my great-grandfather bonded another pure blooded demon and those after. My blood is as pure as they come," Katsumoto laughed lightly. "Sadly my dear cousin over here suffers from humanity," he launched himself in front Rin throwing Hisato aside, "where as I do not. Although, I have heard you are quite fertile and bare strong offspring. You are not bothered by that pesky bond. Would you bare me a child?" Suddenly Katusmoto's hands were running down Rin's back and landed directly on her backside, squeezing her plump round hips. She had sudden flashbacks to the stories she used to hear about Miroku.

"You have to be kidding!" Rin shrieked leaping backwards. She doubled over in a coughing fit and snapped the green whip in the sword threateningly.

"I am not," he grasped Rin's hand in his and pressed it to his chest. "I believe in fidelity. I believe in true love. I believe you could be mine." His lips puckered and approached Rin's mouth. His eyes closed in anticipation of the kiss he was to receive.

Rin tried pulling away from Katsumoto, she turned her head to the side to avoid the lips coming at her. Hisato was on his feet in a flash and wrapped his fingers around Katsumoto's neck. "Let her go," he really didn't want to kill his own stupid cousin.

"Release what is mine," a furious voice came from behind the trees. Sesshomaru flew through the leaves and landed next to Rin throwing Katsumoto off of her. Katsumoto slammed into a tree splattering splinters onto the forest floor.

Rin breathed a sigh of relief. "I think he's smitten with me."

"I told you to remain in the Villa," Sesshomaru snarled at Rin. The whites of his eyes tinged red around the sides.

"I wanted you to find me," she folded her arms defiantly. "It was a game."

"I find you flirting with another demon," Sesshomaru growled at her frustrated.

"I was not flirting," Rin coughed into her elbow and wiped her nose on her sleeve. "He was flirting with me!"

"Is this human sickness I have heard of. Sesshomaru, you do not take care of what is yours," Katsumoto stood up. "And you take another when you know how sensitive humans are to such issues. Come, Rin was it? I can promise my fidelity," his voice was sing song and seductive.

Rin rubbed her forehead feeling her head starting to hurt worse. She sneezed into her hands and rubbed her shoulders. "Can you take me back now that my game is ruined?" She leaned her head tiredly against Sesshomaru's shoulder. "He grabbed my butt."

Sesshomaru clenched his teeth a fury building within him, "leave."

"I'd rather stay," Katsumoto stalked over to Sesshomaru, "does she always smell so intoxicating?"

"That smell is not for you," Hisato growled from the corner of the forest. "She always smells like that when he is around. Have you ever even bedded a woman?" He laughed at his cheeky cousin.

Suddenly the demon turned red. "She could teach me."

Rin burst into a belly laugh that ended in her doubled over laughing, "real love eh? I'd rather stay with my demon lover. Sesshomaru, take me back to the Villa."

The second Sesshomaru turned to pick up Rin, she was hauled off the forest floor by foreign arms. She opened her eyes to see black hair flying next to her. Katsumoto had an arrogant grin on his face. His claws tickled her sides, "I think I will keep you."

"I'm taken dammit!" Rin flicked her katana up slamming the whip into Katsumoto's face. It threw him off balance making him drop her. She shrieked as she braced herself to land in the cold river water. Seconds before the water enveloped her she was grabbed again by the same foreign arms and plopped on a rock formation in the middle of the rushing water. The rapids rushed past her in a white fury. There would be no escaping.

Katsumoto hovered in front of her blocking Sesshomaru's path. He drew both his katanas with a cocky smile, "you are getting old Dog Lord. Can you not keep up?" Katsumoto sniggered.

Rin finally had a chance to look at the stature of the demon that was pursuing her. He was shorter than Sesshomaru and his face more youthful. She thought he looked as if he was sixteen years old at most. "Sesshomaru!" Rin yelled from the rock.

Sesshomaru did not draw Bakusaiga. His eyes flashed back and forth from Katsumoto to Rin. She looked exhausted. She had black circles around her eyes. Her scent was spiking lightly in fear. "She is taken," Sesshomaru barked at Katsumoto.

"I challenge you for her hand then!" Katsumoto boasted, "if I win, she is mine."

"I'm not yours!" Rin screamed annoyed.

"This Sesshomaru accepts your challenge," Sesshomaru lunged at Katsumoto.

Hisato landed next to Rin as the battle behind them ensued. Sesshomaru seemed to be having a hard time keeping up with Katsumoto. The younger demon danced from rock to rock, tree to tree avoiding blow after blow. "Sesshomaru-sama is in trouble. Katsumoto is one of the fastest Dog demons of the age. Sesshomaru-sama has might in power and speed but Katsumoto is faster."

"Great. So how long do I have to sit here? And what is with this challenge?" Rin lowered herself onto the rock. She leaned over and let the river water splash over her wrist. She splashed the water on her face and drank of the crisp liquid.

"The challenge is valid, kind of," Hisato lowered himself next to Rin. "A dog demon may challenge another for rights to a female, but it typically is not taken seriously. Katsumoto thinks you're his because of your arousing smell."

Rin turned red, "do you all smell it?"

"Of course," Hisato answered blandly, "we ignore it. I am already bound to one. Sato ignores it. Hideyoshi was aroused by your scent but controlled it for fear of meeting the deadly end of your lovers claws."

Rin's head snapped left as Katsumoto was slammed into a crop of trees, blasting wood into the air and clearing a good patch of the forest. "This is so stupid. He reminds me of the stories I used to hear about Miroku. My head hurts," she massaged her temples. She suddenly felt very hot. Her eyes rolled into the back of her head. "Hisato," she reached from him as the world turned black.

"Are you alright Rin-sama?" Hisato held her by the shoulders. He gave her body a light shake, "Rin-sama?" She did not stir. He put the back of his hand on her forehead. "She's fevered," he whispered. "Sesshomaru-sama! She fainted!"

Hisato was answered by a wrathful snarl. Sesshomaru attempted to get to Rin's limp body on the rock only to be blocked by the more youthful Katsumoto. He decided to take a different approach to the battle. Rather than chase his target, he floated over the river in Rin's direction, refusing to budge as he was engaged. Each time Katsumoto came at him he flicked his wrist sending his whip out or his claws throwing the younger demon off. Katsumoto glanced over his shoulder shocked to see Rin limp in his cousin's arms. The youthful black haired demon flew to Rin's side. The moment his hands were on Rin, Sesshomaru snapped, his anger at its breaking point. He grabbed the younger demon by the neck and held him up, "you will not touch her. This challenge is over." His claws fumed green.

Katsumoto winced in pain as the poison bled into his neck.

"Let him go Sesshomaru-sama," Hisato adjured him. "He is young and foolish. Three hundred and forty years, he thinks he is ready for a mate. He is not worth your energies."

"Shut up cousin," Katsumoto attempted to claw at the hand that held him.

"I'm telling your mother," Hisato informed him haughtily.

Katsumoto's face fell. If it was possible for his white skin to get paler and green around the edges it did. "I yield." He said quietly.

"Do not approach her again," Sesshomaru released the impudent inu-yokai. He knelt down by Rin and touched her forehead. "Silly woman. The fever has returned," he let his yoki flow into her body searching for injuries. He found none. He soothed the pain she felt in her head and hefted her into his arms, "she is tired. Hisato, send more soup for her and herbs that will treat her fever. Why are you still here?" He glowered at the infuriating intruder.

"Please don't tell mother," Katsumoto caught Hisato's arm. "Do not tell mother." The young inu-yokai trembled in fear.

"If you swear your allegiance to Sesshomaru-sama, I will forget your actions. On your knees Katsumoto," Hisato had to keep his cheeks tense to avoid bursting into a raucous laughter.

Katsumoto knelt in front of Sesshomaru and bowed his head. He crossed one arm in a fist over his heart, "I swear my allegiance to the Dog Lord Sesshomaru."

"This Sesshomaru accepts your allegiance," Sesshomaru bowed curtly. "You may leave until I have need of you." He dismissed the young demon. He flew into the air in the direction of the Villa with his sweating lover in his arms. He sniffed her neck as she hung limply in his arms. "Who is his mother?" He asked Hisato who trailed behind him.

"Yasuko," Hisato tried not to laugh when he saw recognition flit across Sesshomaru's eyes.

"Yasuko the daughter of Kasaimaru?" Sesshomaru landed in front of the villa.

"The same," Hisato turned his back as the door to the villa was opened.

"Is her temper the same as it was before?"

"Worse," Hisato answered. "Katsumoto is her youngest child and the most wayward. His heart is open to humans and hanyous. If she found out he tried to take your mate, well he may suffer for several centuries."

Sesshomaru flexed his cheek muscles to keep from openly smiling. "Hisato, send word to the Miko. I require information on human illness and how they recover. She should not have to suffer from such maladies."

"Right away Sesshomaru-sama. Shall I bring the information here?"

"Home," he said quickly, "we return in two days."

"Yes Sesshomaru-sama," Hisato bowed in respect. He turned around gritting his teeth, "may I speak freely?"

"You may speak carefully," Sesshomaru pulled Rin up higher to his cheek.

"Gobodo-sama sent a message. As…cute as she phrased it, it is that you decided to bring Rin here in our tradition, Yuki is tearing the house to pieces. She refused to go to the castle in the sky. When she was forced, according to your mother, she melted seven rooms before Gobodo-sama yielded and brought her back to your home. Harutoga has been angry and apparently took it out on half the forest behind your home. Your children are unhappy."

"Tell my mother, we will return in two days. I will deal with Yuki and Harutoga then. Mother yielded to Yuki?" Sesshomaru bit his lower lip to keep the laughter from falling from his lips.

"She is not happy about it. Yuki threatened to destroy the entire castle if she was not taken home. She tried to melt Tsukimaru," Hisato's voice was anything but humorous.

"Two days Hisato," Sesshomaru repeated himself. "Leave," he ordered him. Sesshomaru strode into the villa and set Rin down on the blankets. He took the bucket and handed it to Hisato whose back was still turned. "Go to Bukoseno. Bring my son and fill this with clean water. Leave the bucket by the door. We leave in two days. You will resume your post afterwards."

"Yes, Sesshomaru-sama," Hisato flew towards the river first to retrieve the water.

Sesshomaru returned to Rin who shivered in the blankets. "I told you to rest my heart. What were you thinking?" He removed his haori, inner layer and hikama. He sat down next to Rin and removed her sweat soaked dirty yukata. He picked her up and put her under the covers curling himself around her naked body. He kissed her brow, softly stroking the damp hair from her face. He held her as the day continued. He took Taiyomaru from Hisato and helped the baby nurse. Rin barely stirred. When the infant was done he called for Jaken to take the baby back to Bukoseno. He heard scuffling by the door and the fresh smell of food and herbs. He picked up the fresh bucket of water and washed Rin's back and shoulders with the cool water to calm the fever. When he was finished he brought the tray of food in and lifted Rin up enough to help her drink some of the warmed tea.

She coughed as the liquid touched her lips. Her eyes opened lazily. She touched the stripes of his face, "my love," she whispered weakly.

He said nothing. He set her down on the bed and resumed his position next to her.

Rin rolled over wrapping her arms around his chest. She nuzzled her nose into the crook in his neck. She was answered with a warning growl. "What's wrong?" Her voice was hoarse.

There was no answer again. She pulled back to look in his face. His eyes were stern. His face was lined. His teeth clenched. His breath came out in shudders. His eyes were red around the edges.

"What's wrong?" Rin asked Sesshomaru again, "are you upset?"

His eyes went to Rin then the ceiling, ignoring her completely.

"Sesshomaru?" She tried to pull his chin back to hers.

He pushed her hand down with more force than necessary refusing to allow her to move his face.

"Sesshomaru you're scaring me," Rin pushed herself up, shielding the front of her body with the sheet.

Those words got his attention, but he wasn't able to get the words to his mouth. He was angry with her for running off when they were meant to stay in seclusion. He was afraid, when he came back to the Villa and found it empty. He could not sense her emotions from that distance. His first stop was to Bukoseno to see if his son was still there. Only after that did he understand that perhaps she was playing a game. He took a deep breath still avoiding her gaze.

She set her hand down on the scar on his chest, the gift from his father to always cherish her. "Let me feel it. Whatever it is. If you can't tell me, please? Your silence is scaring me."

He closed his eyes, allowing his emotions to enter into her through their connection. Tears immediately fell from her eyes. She felt it. All of it. He feared she had left him again. He feared being unable to find her. His heart had irrationally thought that she had decided she couldn't live with him bound to another. Then came the intense jealousy from seeing another practically covering her body with theirs. "I'm sorry," she whispered against his chest, "I didn't mean to scare you or make you jealous. Are you going to push me away if I try to kiss you?"

He let his lips cover hers in response. He bit back his frustration and sent her waves of comfort and love, "I could not sense your emotions," he finally spoke. "I could not feel your humor at a distance."

"Don't you trust me?" Rin scooted closer to him. Her teeth chattered against his chest.

He finally moved to wrap his arms around her shoulders. He pressed his cheek against her forehead, "no more than you trust me."

"Sesshomaru?" Rin broke into a coughing fit.

"You think this Sesshomaru doesn't feel it, when you are near? That you are still jealous and fearful of my bond to her? Even though I have promised not to approach her? I have made every effort to ensure that she will give us peace for the duration of your life and you still do not trust me."

She knew his words were true. She hated feeling that way but it was her truth. She tried to roll over, turning her back to him. She was caught by two forceful hands.

"Do not turn your back on this Sesshomaru. Answer me. You do not trust me?"

"I'm trying," she muttered. "I really am. You went to her again when you knew it would hurt me."

"I went to her to silence her."

"As if you didn't enjoy it," Rin kept her face hidden in the crook of his shoulder as it met his chest.

He sighed, "would you not have had you and the other man made love?"

"Don't make me think of that." Rin tried to pull loose from his grip.

"No. You will not run from this Rin. Had that man not been Touma and you found peace in his arms. Would you have enjoyed making love?"

"That's not a fair question."

"And what you ask me is fair?"

"It's not the same thing!"

"Are we stuck in this place Rin?" He let her go. She rolled away from him covering her eyes crying into the palms of her hands. "This place, where neither one of us can trust the other. I went to her once in the castle with your permission. Yes, it was enjoyable. She was warned to keep her distance, that it would not happen again in your lifetime. She must wait for her time with me. Are we trapped?" He pulled her wet chin back to his eyes. He pressed his lips into hers, "will you never trust this Sesshomaru as you once did?"

Rin wiped her nose. "I'm trying," she pulled herself into his chest. Her stomach riled with emotions and the discomfort of being sick. "I feel like I'm going to throw up." She felt the heat of his yoki entering her body, it washed into her stomach easing the nausea. "Thank you," she shuddered against him. "You don't trust me either."

"This Sesshomaru is trying," he nuzzled her nose lovingly.

"Why can't Kagome-sama break the bond between you two?"

Sesshomaru closed his eyes against her brow. "I asked," he had not told Rin. "Before your battle with the Ogre King as she was leaving you. It is impossible. The spiritual bond is embedded too deeply. The Miko nearly purified me in the process of sealing our bond. She knew that it would kill this Sesshomaru to take it completely. If the same were to happen to my bond to Natsuki-"

"You would die," Rin finished his sentence. She wiped her eyes. "Please be patient with me. I am trying. I promised I would not leave you again. I…" there was only so much she had shared about her vision, "I know what I mean to you. At least I think I do. Your father showed me so much. Please Sesshomaru? Please give me time to heal."

"Give this Sesshomaru time," he kissed her lips, "I love you. I am not whole without you."

"You never told me what he showed you," Rin held him tighter.

"Us," he answered quietly. "He helped me to see the strength in my feelings for you. The truth of my love for you," his fingers ran through her hair. "Do you still like this?" He pushed his claws in enough to make her skin tingle and raked his fingers through her hair.

"Yes," she sighed against him. "I'm sorry I worried you."

"Rin," he picked her chin up. His lips caressed hers. He tenderly eased her mouth open, sliding his tongue along hers. He pulled back slightly, "I love you. Trust this Sesshomaru as you once did. My heart is yours."

"And mine yours," she smiled. "Please, just be patient with me. I thought I would be long dead before you found someone else."

"It does not feel the same with her," Sesshomaru said quickly. "When I am with you, it's as if our souls connect. When I was with her, the connection was weak, lacking as if it was fake. Perhaps I would have felt more for her if not for the pain she caused us. I will be patient with your heart as you will be patient with mine."

Rin kissed his lips this time. She broke it after a moment to cough against his chest. "I feel so hot."

"You were too sick for this game," his hand fell on her forehead. "Your skin is hotter than it was last night."

"When will it be as strong as it was before?" She set her hand over his heart.

"In time. It will happen faster this time because this Sesshomaru knows how to nurture it properly. What we had before was built on ten years of life together. It cannot be replaced in one week."

"Will you not trust me until it is like it was before?"

"I will trust you," he picked the tea up and brought it to her lips, "drink."

She drank several gulps before stopping. "I will try to trust you Sesshomaru. I'm sorry. I just wanted to play a game with you, like we did before we had children."

"I forgive you, my heart. Try to rest. Your body is exhausted."

"I'm ruining our week by being sick."

"No, this is also enjoyable."

"Fighting?"

"No," his chest rumbled with laughter, "someone who appreciates my thoughts. Someone this Sesshomaru enjoys speaking with. And this," he kissed her lips. His tongue ran across her top lip. He suckled her bottom lip. He rest his forehead against hers, "rest."

"Where are my clothes?"

"I removed them."

"Why?"

"We are in seclusion."

"Being naked is part of it?"

"Yes," he tickled her back with his claws. "I have not taught you enough about Inu-yokai customs. This villa was created specifically for what you would term as newlyweds to spend time enjoying each other's company. The female does not leave the villa. She remains, while the male provides for her needs. Much as I did when we spent the month by what has become our home. Couples stay until they feel their bonds are stable. There are many such villas around the Western Lands. This one belonged to my family. It was built by my grand-father two thousand years ago. Chichiue brought his human lover here," he caressed her cheek with the back of his finger. "Nakedness reflects trust," he pulled her hand around his waist. "It also makes, making love a smoother process."

"I wish we had more time," she kissed his fingers.

"As do I. Our children miss us. Hisato informed me they are unhappy in mother's care. It was too soon to leave them again. We will complete our week and return to Yuki and Harutoga. I will stay home one day before leaving for a week."

"And then you'll be home for three weeks," Rin grinned. "I can't wait," she pulled his mouth down to hers. "I love you. I really do."

"And I you," he wrapped his mokomoko around her.

She snuggled into his warmth and tried to sleep. "My head hurts." She felt vibrations against her face.

"Shall I ease your aches?"

"Please. Then I will sleep better. Someone is excited." She tapped the tip of his erection with her finger. It poked into the side of her stomach.

"Should I not be? Even sick you are beautiful."

"Let me please you," she tried to wrap her fingers around him.

He caught her hand and shook his head, "rest," he wrapped his arms around her fevered body. "You may pleasure me later when you are able to enjoy it. For now, allow your body to rest."

"You may have to stop poking me then," she giggled and then broke into another coughing fit when his claws danced up her bare side. "Mmh," she snuggled into his shoulder. "I love you," she cupped his chin and pulled his lips to hers. She sat up lightly pressing her mouth harder into his.

"And I you," he pulled back slightly and tickled her chin, "rest now. There is more soup if you are hungry. Taiyomaru fed while you slept. There is nothing we need worry about for now."

**LOL leave a review if you remember who Yasuko is. If you don't, read the section Let's Talk about Sex Baby.**

**Please remember to review and leave requests. Bit by bit I will get to them. And review like seriously people...how is the Sess/Rin supposed to continue if people don't review? I don't know if you realized this, but the majority of stories on FF are all Sess/Kag a lot of that has to do with readership only reviewing and favoriting those stories which might turn many writers to writing that pairing instead of this one. It's a little more even on AO3. So please review review review, or else Sess/Rin is going to die a slow and painful death on FF. Not to mention Inuyasha is a fading fandom.**

**My author nomination for this post goes to Iye Tea. I have never read anyone with such mastery over the English language and a complex reincarnation story. The Narrow Savage Road is amazing. They just started posting Mudita which I am also in love with already. **

**Estherale247 **_This one is for you! I will get to the visit where Sesshomaru smells her smelling like him but not all at once. I wrote down a draft for the Disease. I believe it will be in there. These drabbles are going to lead up to it._

**Guest:** _I tried to figure where to put in future SEsshomaru and at the moment he has no place in these drabbles. I started Inu/Kag Drabbles to let them have some stories but also to tell the story of future Sesshomaru and Kagome. I can tell you that part of his fascination started in the drabble called Sesshomaru's Regret. In that one Rin has still not woken after fighting the Healer. He sees Kagome bring a bunch of different machines from her time to help treat Rin. He starts reading Gray's Anatomy. It only grows from there. It's a long process and can't be told in one drabble. But between all of the stories together it will be made clear._


	31. Relaxation

**Yay thank you all for the reviews. Besides Instinct this story has the most reviews! YAY! It makes me happy. I am going to leave a list below of requests because I think I have forgotten a few and just realized I am about 8 deep. EEEK! Some of them will be more appropriate to write later, but I will get to what I can as I can. I want to wrap up Rin and Sesshomaru in their week of seclusion. There will probably be one more one shot in the Villa after this one that will be lemony and limy and full of citrus content. I want to do one of him leaving her for the first time since Instinct too.**

**Requests**

**One of their kids first words – Consistent guest**

**Female demon flirt with Rin- Guest**

**Rin comes back from spending time in the future- Estherale247**

**More after Rin's Passing and how Sesshomaru became a doctor-Guest**

**Rin and Sesshomaru's Reaction to Her Aging Slower- Estherale247**

**Rest of Gobodo-sama and Hisato- WarriorMaiden60**

**Sesshomaru react to Chocolate- Guest**

**Yuki's First Love- Guest**

**If I left off your request please leave a review letting me know. A member of my household is having a non-emergent, rather common medical procedure next week so I may not post much on any of my stories in the next two weeks. It depends on how I am able to use my time.**

**Without more adieu...**

**Relaxation**

Evening came quickly. The sky changed again from bright blue as it always seemed to be with white wisps of clouds to deep blue. A modicum of stars hung in the sky as the last rays of the sun disappeared behind the horizon. The wind blew outside the window of the villa, gently rustling the leaves on the ancient trees.

Sesshomaru felt exhaustion creeping in, but sleep would not come. He closed his eyes and willed his body to rest. He lay on his back with one hand behind his head the other was wrapped around Rin. In her sleep she had turned so her back was cuddled into his chest and her head rest against his bicep. He tried curling against her back, only to find that the heat of her skin was a distraction. He was worried. The fever didn't seem to want to break. He asked Jaken for more of the herbs that were meant to break her fever. He told Hisato to send word back to Sota to return to his childhood village and call his mother to send something. That could take days. They would be home before Sota returned.

Jaken came in an hour later with a hot kettle he left hanging on the fireplace. Concerned creased the little green face seeing Rin shivering and huddled against Sesshomaru's chest. He left a bowl of garlic and ginger root soup on the tray with fresh drinking water. He bowed respectfully and left.

Sesshomaru heard thunder beat at the skies. Out the window, gray clouds filled in the dark blue sky. The smell of fresh rain permeated the air. Summer rains were coming. The droplets started gently, only to be replaced with a downpour. Flashes of radiant light lit the darkening sky, followed by booms. Sesshomaru eased Rin off his bicep onto the bed. He rose and closed the large wooden flap to the window to stop the rain from entering the villa. No sooner had he finished then he heard Rin stirring in her sleep.

"Sesshomaru!" Rin screamed bolting upright. Her brown eyes flashed in fear, her pupils engorged. She flew from the bed throwing the cover off and made it as far as the door before he caught her around the waist.

Sesshomaru held her tightly not wanting her to slip on the smooth stones as she had before. Her skin was still heated with the fever. Her fear beat at his nostrils unrelentingly.

"I have to find them!" She beat against his arm, "he's going to kill them! Let me go!" She tried fruitlessly to get out of his grip.

"Shh," he quieted her pulling her back into the bed. He knew he had to be careful. If he touched her wrists it would set her off. The first night back in their home after they left his mother's castle, he had grabbed her wrists to stop her from calling her sword. She begged _Touma _to release her. Sesshomaru thought his heart would break all over again, hearing her refer to him by his brother's name. He kept arms under her breasts, avoiding any sensitive areas. "Shh," he crooned his lips next to her ear, "wake up my heart," he tenderly shook her. "Wake up," he nuzzled her neck.

Her eyes tracked to his. Her arms wrapped around his shoulders. She grabbed his face as if checking that it was truly him. "Sesshomaru? I thought…it's raining," she looked at the small dribbles of rain making their way into the Villa. She shook her head as if shaking out the images in her head. "What day is it?" She asked with a hand on her own forehead.

"You slept a few hours. It's the same day," he sat up holding her. He rubbed her shoulders with the back of his hands firmly, "are you okay?"

"Just a nightmare," she sagged against his chest catching her breath.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He found the more she told him what haunted her the less she dreamed of it.

"He didn't hurt them? Did he? Hideyoshi?" Her lips quivered, "I tried to get to them. I don't know what happened. I sent Hisato," two fingers pressed against her lips.

"He did not hurt them. He tried. I…" he paused measuring his words. He feared telling her about the moonstones and that he had heard the sword call him. Rather than go to her first he went to their children whom he viewed more vulnerable. "I went to them first. I felt your need through the katana. Yuki had slashed Hideyoshi's throat loading him full of dokkasu, Harutoga burnt his legs. When I arrived Yuki was attempting to stop a transformed Inu-yokai from getting her brothers. Foolish, she knew they couldn't outrun them together."

"She was going to sacrifice herself?" Rin rubbed her eyes. She pulled her knees to her chest, "what did I do? She's just a child."

"My child," he reminded her. "It is not what you did. It is who I am. You were a target for Naraku. A presumed weakness when you were a child. My enemies circled Kaede's village non-stop in the years that you lived there. It is not what you did. It is who I am."

"So it's all your fault. I like that," Rin's giggle turned into a string of coughs that had her leaning heavily on Sesshomaru's bare chest.

He touched her forehead cursing under his breath. "Your skin is not cooling with these herbs."

Rin shrugged, "it must be some fever," she touched her head. "You weren't sleeping?"

He shook his head. He reached for the kettle on the fire. He picked up one of the sashays and set it inside the glass cup. He poured the water inside and set the kettle to cool on the tray. He felt fingers on his shoulders rubbing his muscles. He grasped her fingers in his hand. "Rest, Rin."

"Lay on your stomach," she pushed herself up and scooted to the edge of the bed. She took the other empty glass cup and poured out the contents of the sashay. She poured a minimal amount of water on top of the herbs then added water from the wooden bottle next to the futon until it was warm enough to make her finger tingle. She let the herbs soak for a minute as a confused Sesshomaru watched her. She beat the herbs to pieces with her middle finger. "Lay on your stomach," she raised an eyebrow at him. "I'm sick my love, don't fight with me. It's not nice."

He sighed and rolled over onto his stomach. She moved his hands so they were over his head. "What are you doing?" He asked her enjoying the feel of her fingers running through his hair as she moved it off his back.

"Relaxing you. You look tired," she scooted with her cup over to his back. "These same herbs relax the muscles. They should work on you. Let me know if it's too hot." She pushed the last of his hair off his back revealing two long stripes just over his mokomoko. She poured the contents of the cup over his back. She pushed her fingers into his muscles starting with his shoulders. She massaged the thew in round circles.

"Mmh," he sighed. "You are ill," he felt his muscles loosening under her firm touch. He didn't enjoy the scent of the herbs. "These smell."

"They're working though," she pressed the palms of her hands into his shoulder blades, down the center of his back. She massaged the herbs into his lower back, around his mokomoko, over his well-defined backside. He flinched at the contact with his buttocks. "Don't get excited," Rin giggled as she worked her hands back up and spent time rubbing the sides of his neck. She ran her fingers up and down the tender nerves that lined the back of his neck then the sides, repeating the motion over and over again, until his eyes were shutting in satisfaction.

"Too late," Sesshomaru smiled up at her. "I am being massaged by a beautiful naked human."

Rin leaned over his face, "roll over." She pushed on his side.

"No," he said more seriously, "I can control myself while you are ill."

"What if I want it?" She coughed into her hands and reached for a cloth for her nose.

"No," he sat up and held Rin as she leaned into her cough. He rubbed her back while she broke into another horrible sounding crackling cough that made her wheeze when she tried to breathe in. "You're lungs are making an interesting sound." He leaned his ear down on her back closing his eyes as he listened. "They are making a crackling noise at the base. Is it difficult to breathe?"

"It feels tight. Stop worrying, I'll be fine," she cuddled against his chest. "You on the other hand…"

"Will also be fine. Drink your tea," he handed her the hot cup. "I believe you have a human ailment that is effecting your lungs."

She tested the tea with her finger and drank the contents. "You're still reading Gray's Anatomy aren't you?"

"It's is an involved book. It's fascinating. I believe yokai have many of the same organs inside their bodies, although we are not susceptible to illness."

"You should cut one open the next time you kill one and compare," Rin joked.

"I have considered it. Ogres come in steady supply, although their bodies are nothing like the human body."

"Yours is," Rin leaned against his chest. He nibbled softly on her neck.

"This is not my true body. It is the one I maintain because it involves the least amount of yoki to sustain it," he reminded her. They had had this conversation before.

"I know. It's sustained by food, water, yoki and sleeping once a month. Unless you wear yourself out. Which you usually do in battle, or when making love to me," she pulled his lips down to hers. "I'm tired again," she yawned. "You didn't kill that cute little yokai did you?"

"Cute?" Sesshomaru snarled to himself. "Katsumoto was not cute."

"He was like a puppy," Rin argued. "You didn't kill him did you?"

"No. He swore allegiance to this Sesshomaru," he smiled arrogantly. "He will live, for now."

Rin picked up the lukewarm soup and drank the broth. She set the bowl down and curled back into Sesshomaru's chest. "Is it still raining?"

He paused listening, "it has stopped."

"Take me somewhere," she huddled into the trunk of his body. "Now I'm cold again." Her lips shivered despite the heat of her body.

She was immediately enveloped in his mokomoko. He wrapped his arms around her shoulders. "We are in seclusion."

"I'm getting bored in here," she whined. "I want to sit in a tree by the river."

"Taiyomaru is crying," Sesshomaru stood up. He wrapped her in the yellow sheet then the thicker green blanket and pulled his hikama on. He threw his haori over his shoulders, "do not run this time."

"Take me somewhere after you bring him back?" Rin held her hands up begging and pouted her lip out.

"You are breaking all of the customs," Sesshomaru laughed.

"Human, I can't help it." She leaned back in the bed on the pillows wrapped in her blanket cocoon. "I'll stay put, if you promise to take me to a tree by the river. You have to snuggle with me while we sit by the river."

Sesshomaru rolled his eyes laughing while stuffing his katana's into his obi. He kneeled down in front of Rin pecking her lips playfully, "if that," peck, "is what," peck, "I must do," peck, peck, until he pushed her deeper into the pillows and luxuriated in her lips, "to keep you happy," he stroked her bottom lips his thumb, "then snuggling by the river it is. Rest. I will return quickly." He opened the door and disappeared into a ball of light.

He found Bukoseno tossing Taiyomaru in feet into the air and catching him in a hammock of squirrel branches padded with plump green leaves, while the infant screamed at the top of his lungs. As soon as the tree caught sight of Taiyomaru's father, he tossed the bellowing child at him. Sesshomaru caught him mid-air. Taiyomaru continued his yelling. "He ate boar meat an hour ago. I believe it is his mother's milk he craves. How is your soulmate?"

"Awaiting my return," Sesshomaru turned to leave.

A single tree branch slithered around his ankle and forced him to a halt, "shall we have this dance again Sesshomaru?" Bukoseno's voice fettered in seriousness.

Sesshomaru heaved a rather large sigh and bit out, "better." The tree branch tugged on his ankle again. "What do you wish this Sesshomaru to divulge?" He had learned his lesson years before the tree was stronger than he was. There was no sense fighting it.

"Are you happy?" Bukoseno asked him.

"Yes," Sesshomaru replied.

"Is she?"

"I believe so," Sesshomaru snuggled his son bouncing him lightly in his hands. He tickled the striped cheeks and rubbed the points of his little ears. It never ceased to amaze him that Taiyomaru had pointed ears like his own.

"Is trust rebuilt?" The tree released his ankle.

"Growing," Sesshomaru nuzzled Taiyomaru's nose. The baby immediately bit down hard drawing his father's blood. He pulled his son off and chuckled, "is that all Bukoseno?"

"These things take time. It was wise of you to bring her hear to bond with her again. You may leave," the tree made no effort to hide his laughter as Sesshomaru disappeared into a white ball of light. He knew, they needed this privacy to fix what had been damaged.

He landed in front of the villa relieved to smell Rin still inside despite the overwhelming scent of illness. He knocked before opening the door giving her time to hide her nakedness. He opened the door and handed her the fussing baby. Taiyomaru practically flung himself at Rin's nipples, clamping down so hard she winced in pain. "He likes my breasts more than you do."

"I find that hard to believe," he fondled her other nipple.

"Stop that," she slapped his hand down. "Are you going to allow me to get dressed?"

"Yes. I will not have you parading around naked where others can see. Your beauty is mine to behold," he sat down behind her and pulled her back against his chest. His hand went to her forehead, "the fever has cooled slightly."

"The herbs are helping," she barked against his mokomoko. "Can you reach my yukata?"

He lifted a teal one from the floor. Rin's face warped in confusion. That wasn't the one she had been wearing earlier.

"Did you think I would have you wear the same dirty garment as before?" He helped her slide her arms in, while she held the baby with her knee upraised and one hand to keep him latched. "Do human males provide like this for their wives?"

"I think your tastes are more lavish," she pulled the material closed enough to cover her front. She tilted her neck to the side. Without realizing what she was doing her left hand went to the right side of her neck.

Sesshomaru moved her hand and clamped down enough to prick her skin, "it is no longer there." He bit down slightly again and licked the delicate skin. He ended by pressing his lips into the curve of her neck and sighing. He was gladdened that Rin leaned into his mouth increasing the pressure of his mouth against her skin.

"I know it's not there," she sighed shrugging her shoulder against his teeth. "I can still feel it. At least I only had two nightmares this week. Not like the weeks right after when they were almost nightly." She exhaled against him. "Is that what you do, in place of nightmares? You just don't sleep?"

"Perhaps," he wrapped his arms around her waist. "My mind was troubled."

"By what?"

"Our arguments," he admitted sadly. "Before the Healer took your memories. You were angry with me. You did not accompany me when I left. I was frustrated with your attitude. When I returned you were near death. Your memories were gone," he closed his eyes and pressed his nose into her neck, "I didn't know if you would resurface. If you were lost to this Sesshomaru forever. The time was wasted," he kissed her neck. "I do not want our time filled with angry words."

"We're bound to argue though. Kagome and Inuyasha always argue," Rin switched Taiyomaru to her other breast. "So do Miroku and Sango. If Akari's husband wasn't a pure-blooded demon she would have roasted him a few times. It's not so different than what happens in other couples."

"That's not what I mean," he puffed air frustrated with his inability to express himself. He closed his eyes threaded his yoki into her heart allowing her to feel what he did rather than try to explain himself.

"You felt guilty then. You feel guilty now," Taiyomaru fell asleep. She pulled him off and gave him to Sesshomaru. "We agreed to forgive each other."

"How can I forgive my instincts for the damage they caused?"

"Come here my love," she motioned him forward. He complied. She wrapped her arms around his waist. She pulled his face down to hers, "forgive yourself. I forgive you. We are together again. That is all that matters. I love you," she whispered against his lips, "only you."

"And I you," he set her hand on his heart. "Forgive this Sesshomaru for these nightmares, for the months we lost."

"They aren't your fault."

"Do you not feel safe in my arms?"

"I feel safe. I think you forget who I am. Remember the little girl that used to have nightmares about her parents death for years and years?"

"Your dreams stopped for years before the Healer entered our lives," he reminded her. "It had an effect on you. A deep one," he moved a tendril of hair over ear. "Are my arms no longer safe?"

Rin lowered her eyes and sighed, "why was he able to take my mind so easily? Was I not strong enough?"

"Our bond was not strong enough. Had I been less arrogant, I would have created a deeper connection and sensed the intrusion," he cupped her face in his hand. "His magic was powerful. Touma was manipulative. Do you think you are all powerful?" Sesshomaru chuckled knowing that it was he who almost always was the one that felt all powerful, until something happened that proved he wasn't. He tucked Taiyomaru into the basket next to the bed and covered him with furs. "The dreams will fade."

Rin nodded, then sneezed into her hands. "They are fading. Um…Sesshomaru?"

"What my heart?" He kept his arms wrapped around her.

"Is it strong enough you could let me know you are okay from time to time? I hate when you're gone for a week. I know how powerful you are but I still get worried."

"We will try. If it isn't, would word through my allies be acceptable?"

"Yes," she smiled finally standing. She tied her obi closing her yukata. "Think the magic servants will watch him while we find a tree to sit in?"

"The magic servants will watch him," Sesshomaru stood up. "I will carry you."

She crossed her arms stubbornly.

"You are weak right now."

She raised an eyebrow.

"You will make yourself worse by walking. It's a mile away," he insisted.

"Can I ride on your back?" Rin asked with a big grin on her face.

"I am not your beast of burden," he folded his arms.

"But you are my demon lover. My dog demon lover," she hugged him around the waist, batting her eyelashes at him. "Please?"

"Do not look at this Sesshomaru with those eyes."

She stuck her bottom lip out.

He pushed her lip back into her mouth with his index finger, "you are playing on my love for you."

"Is it working?" She bounced up and kissed his lips. "I'll reward you later."

That perked his ears up. "How?"

She pulled his ear down to her mouth and whispered sensuously in it. He cleared his throat and shuffled his feet feeling his back tighten and his arousal return with a fury. "You will follow through on this promise when the fever breaks." He knelt down on one knee. She brushed his hair over his shoulder and wrapped her legs around his waist. He grabbed her butt with both of his hands, squeezing a generous amount of her skin in his hands.

"Hey!" She shrieked leaping lightly at the pricks of his nails against her skin.

"You did not say I could not taste my reward now," he opened the door. "Hold on," he turned into an orb of light and sped through the forest. He followed the sound of rushing water until he found the tallest tree with the thickest branches. He chose a bough to hold them that was easily thirty feet off the ground. He landed first finding his place to sit before pulling Rin into his lap. His legs hung down the sides of the tree while she sat in between them. He wrapped her into his mokomoko and lavishly kissed her tired lips. "You will fall asleep in my arms."

"And you will sleep when we return. Sesshomaru?"

"What my heart?"

"It's okay…maybe I shouldn't forgive you for what you did. She had no choice either and I needed the time away. I was so embarrassed because the Healer could take my mind so easily. I felt so guilty about not being able to protect our child," she moved in closer to his chest. "I didn't know how to tell you I needed a break from our life."

"From me," he added ruefully.

"No, not from you," she said quickly, "that isn't it." She chewed on her lower lip for a minute. "Do you remember where you found me?"

"You found this Sesshomaru. Give me your lips," he settled into the warm and luscious kiss. "I remember."

"I was a little girl, from a small village before, dressed in rags. Then rescued by you and then even though I lived in Kaede-sama's village, I didn't live like the other girls. My hut was bigger. We had more food. My clothes were nicer. Then we became a family and you made a giant house. I went from living in rags and scavenging for food to not even cooking my own meals. I actually like not cooking my own meals or having to clean my own home, but it just got too complicated. I felt like I didn't deserve you. You deserved better than me."

"You think she is better?"

"Kami no, I think she is young and immature and looks like she should still be living with her mother," Rin retorted.

"She is youthful in appearance."

"So are you, you look like a young man. I probably look older than you," Rin curled her legs up. "This is hurting my bottom."

"Stand up," he helped her stand on the trunk. He slid his mokomoko beneath her as she sat back down. She was turned on her side, with her shoulder nestled against his chest. He turned her face in his hands, "you have not aged in years. I remember this face. There are no new lines."

"You memorize my face?"

"While you sleep. This Sesshomaru memorizes the shape of your face. The lines around your eyes, the color of your hair. One day, you will leave me and I will have nothing left but my memories of you."

"You should ask Kagome to bring you a picture of me. I know she has some," Rin kissed his lips. "Promise me you'll move on."

"How will I love another as I do you?"

"You have to. Or I'll come back and haunt you until you fall in love with someone else."

"Perhaps your soul will be reincarnated as Kikyo's was," he said almost too hopefully.

"Would you look for me?" Rin's eyes lit up.

"I would know your soul when I found it," he licked the side of her neck lovingly.

"Really?"

He opened a flood of yoki into their bond for her to feel, "do you feel that? How there is no end, no beginning? Do you feel our warmth combining, like the edges of a fire, so sweet it's almost painful? When I say we are one soul, we are. I would know it."

"She wouldn't be me," Rin said quietly.

"I will find you in the next life," he lifted her chin. "Do not leave this Sesshomaru again." He pressed her hand against his heart. "These words," he paused knowing what he needed to say but fearful of expressing it. "It broke in your absence. I am not whole without you."

"I hurt you," she whispered swallowing harshly.

"I hurt you," he touched her breast with the palm of his hand. "I felt it when she came by the fireside, while we celebrated the birth of our son. It was as if I abandoned you again."

Rin lowered her eyes.

"A queen lowers her eyes to no one," he lifted her chin. "These words must be spoken."

"I know. Hold me closer," she pushed against him, nudging her side into his chest. "The sound of the river is relaxing. It just feels strange to be in this place with you. I don't mean the tree in your father's lands. I mean where we are in our relationship."

"There are always complications when a yokai takes a human. You have seen them. Chichiue died the day Inuyasha was born. The hanyou Shiori's mother approached this Sesshomaru last year to find haven in our village. The hanyou's father was killed by his own mother. Jinenji's mother was left to her own devices."

"Did you know his father?"

"I know him."

"He's still alive?"

"They were together until she became old, then he left her in the lands he had given her. It was not a wise choice. His son was tormented. This Sesshomaru would never have allowed my children to suffer so."

"Are we giving haven to Shiori's mother?"

"She came months ago while you were away."

"What will you do when I am old? You'll still look like this, with the same physical needs. Humans don't really engage in intimacy as much the older they become. What if I can't please you anymore?"

"When you are old, you will stay close to my heart. Our relationship has never been about the physical pleasure you provide this Sesshomaru. You give me a companion, a friend, family. I will not abandon you because you no longer pleasure my body."

"I'll be an old lady and you'll still be beautiful."

"You will be a beautiful old lady," he rest his chin on the crown of her head. He touched her forehead, "this fever is unrelenting. I do not like it."

"It will break. I've been sicker. Remember when I fell in the river?"

"You leapt in after one of my nephews," he corrected her. "You were very ill."

"Did you cry that night. You said you didn't."

He tilted his head slightly and embraced her mouth in his. He held the kiss until she could no longer breathe because of her stuffed nose. "I prayed to my father to save you."

"You cried."

"I did," he admitted.

"Why do you hide your tears?"

"It is unbecoming of a dai-yokai to cry," he tightened his grip. "You have a disturbing ability to draw emotions out of this Sesshomaru."

"Good. I like your emotions," she rubbed her shoulders against his chest. "I won't tell anyone." She yawned covering her mouth. "I'm tired."

"Shall we return to bed?"

"No, I want to stay here with you."

"For how long?"

"Forever," she whispered rubbing her eyes.

"Then you will stay next to my heart forever," he nipped at her ear.

"Promise me?"

"I promise," he rubbed her shoulders. "Forever," his hand lingered nervously on her forehead.

"Stay," she whispered half asleep in his arms.

"I'm here," his lips brushed against her ear as he spoke.

"Stay," her arms fell limp by her sides. Her head lolled to the side drooping against his shoulder. She wheezed against him. Her chest rose and fell unsteadily. She coughed into his shoulder, gripping his white haori, "Sesshomaru?" She sneezed into his sleeve.

"What my heart?" He nuzzled her burning chin. He didn't need her to say it. She was uncomfortable, tired and desperately wanted to sleep. He lifted her knees up and flew higher into the tree until he floated above the forest. Once he was clear of the tree tops he began their short journey back to the Villa.

"I'm hot," she writhed in his arms. Inky black eyes stared up at him.

He paused mid-air remembering the first time she had fallen ill in his care. It was shortly after the ongoguki demon had taken her. The next morning she was difficult to wake. Her nose ran profusely. Her skin was red. When he touched it, it was hot. He had never availed himself of humans before and had no idea what it was. A day passed, she barely ate, she barely woke. Jaken screamed at her to stop being lazy. The noise made her cry. It was the first time he had heard her sob for her dead mother. By evening his heart clenched in worry. She hadn't moved from her place in the grass. He did the unthinkable. He sent Jaken to find Inuyasha's group and retrieve the two women who traveled with him. They came and told him she needed to be soaked in cold water and drink water. She was dehydrated. He didn't know. He led them to a body of cold water. Kagome and Sango stripped down to their under garments and carried Rin into the water. He had watched in fascination. The red left Rin's cheeks, her eyes tiredly opened. She was happy to see them. They made her soup and put poultices on her chest. They spoon fed her water, impressing upon him the importance of staying hydrated. Inuyasha claimed they couldn't wait for his brat, he still wanted to kill him for that, to get better. Sesshomaru was left with instructions. He soaked her when the fever came back that night. He forced Jaken to make soup for her and even sent him to get herbs from Jinenji.

Sesshomaru kissed her heated brow and flew back to the rushing river waters. He followed it upstream until he found a portion of calm waters. He undressed Rin until she was naked. He removed his own clothing, making a neat pile on the side of the river while keeping Rin pressed against him with his mokomoko. He sloshed into the cold river water finding the deepest area he could where the stream gently rushed passed them. He sat down on a rock in the water. The moment the water hit her skin she shrieked against him, "it's cold…" She hacked into his fur, "please, take me out. It's too cold." Her eyes were to tired to open.

"Your fever needs to break," he reminded her. She was barely awake in his arms.

"No, take me out," she pushed against his chest.

"Shh," he soothed her. He adjusted her so that her shoulders reached his and her head rested against the only part of his mokomoko that was still dry. "Try to rest." Kagome and Sango had told him then, that fever was meant to kill an infection. He tried to couple what he had learned over the years with the new information in Gray's Anatomy. He was vaguely aware that humans had something called an, Immune System. Something he was sure pure-blooded demons did not have. They didn't need one. They did not get sick. She kicked against him trying to get away from the cold enveloping her body. He held her firmly in the water, "stop fighting me. This will help."

Her teeth chattered against his chin. "Please…take the fever," she whined quietly. "Please? I'm cold."

"Your body is still burning," he tested her skin with his lips.

"Please," tears finally came to her eyes. She fell limp against him. "I'm cold…please."

He hated seeing her like this. If there was one sure way to tug on his heart, it was seeing Rin and his children sick or hurt. "My heart," he smoothed her hair. "I don't know how."

"Please," she cried. "It's too cold." Her teeth chattered, her lips shivered. She wrapped her arms around her shoulders in an attempt to stay warm.

He shifted his feet against the brown and grey smoothed rocks beneath his feet. "I'll try," he resolved. It was ridiculous to wield the kind of power that he did and not be able to heal something as miniscule as a human illness from his soulmate. If it started with infection and her immune system was obviously struggling, he would start there. The only problem was he had no idea where it was. He found touch to aid him when it came to first healing her physical injuries. He needed physical contact with the battered or torn skin. Her lungs sounded the worst. Naked as she was against him, he could feel her ribs shuddering as she tried to force air through them. He focused on their warmth, the part of her that was connected to him, their bond. He lay his fingers splayed against her ribs on either side. He closed his eyes, letting his yoki see for him. He vaguely remembered in the book that the human immune system involved various organs of the body, white blood cells and the lymphatic system which involved nodes all over the body. He knew two were in her throat. He directed his yoki there first, bolstering what he felt was already working. He let it lower into her lungs. A bead of sweat from exertion dripped from the middle of his forehead down the crescent moon and over the tip of his nose. He ignored it, focusing on her breathing. The lungs were wet. He could both hear it and sense it. He pressed his yoki into them not sure what its purpose should have been but hoped that it would somehow dry them out so she could breathe easier. He turned to where he knew bone marrow came. He rest the palm of his hand on her lower back. He had done this before, forcing her body to make the blood needed to save her life. This time he focused on his yoki bolstering the kind of blood that flowed into her body, beginning with white blood cells. He told her body to produce more of the cells needed to fight infection. He knew when he did this, his yoki fused with the cells and they began to behave as if they were his. When his eyes finally opened an arrogant smile spread across his face. She breathed easier against him. The rasping and crackling he had heard before finally had dissipated. He touched her forehead. The fever was finally breaking. He kissed the curve of her trembling neck.

She sagged against him now in a deep slumber. He flew her out of the water to their clothing. He dressed her first, shivering in her teal yukata then dressed himself. He resolved to take her back to the Villa and hoped that when she woke she would feel stronger than she did before. He stumbled as he landed, discounting the effort it had taken him to heal her. It was always this way, when he first learned to do something new with his yoki it depleted his strength. He was grateful they had two more days. He landed in the courtyard to Atsuko rocking Taiyomaru's basket and singing lightly to him. He dismissed her with a single look and lay Rin down in the large futon. He divested her of her yukata and himself of his clothing. He snuggled in next to her and covered them both. Her back was to his chest. He held her, kissing her neck, "rest my heart."

She woke briefly to hold his hand. "My love," she muttered giving in to her much needed slumber. She rolled over in her sleep and nuzzled her nose into his neck, sleeping.

**Please continue to review. Unless you are going to whine about how unfair I am to Rin and how Sesshomaru should suffer more then I'm not interested in hearing it. If someone wants to explain to me WTF happened to this fandom in the last 15 years I am all ears. Badass Rin's like mine are few and far between. Most people write her as a prissy girl that cries for her Lord to love her, almost dies then he falls in love with her, marks her, she becomes immortal and they have pureblooded children all to avoid the obvious issues Sesshomaru has with all of the above. First off marking, immortality, Lord of the Western Lands, pureblooded-children as a result from Human/Demon relationships are all fanmade theories. I'm happy (somewhat) they have pervaded the fandom for the last 15 years but I am so not interested in perpetuating them. I came up with my own little world based off canon...with a few personal tweaks. If you think Sesshomaru has gotten off easy you need to re-read the last three stories. Sorry I am being a bit of a biyatch but I already put a rant on Trafficked. I understand now why Sess/kag became a thing in my absence. Not only does no one write Rin into a strong character most of the time, the audience has become so complacent with her being a "weak" character people get attacked for writing strong plot-lines that test her relationship with Sesshomaru. But if it's Kagome it's okay...I could keep venting but I am just going to say this. I am not a fluff writer, I am not going to become one to make other people happy. I am not going to follow the tradition of Sesshomaru being Lord of the Western Lands and not allow he and Rin to experience the best and worst of life...I've avoided having an author vent long enough. This is my vent if you don't like it, please feel free to go find other authors to follow :). Personally I like a fresh take on this story instead of the same old plot lines that have been repeated over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over...thank you. Now to respond to my reviewers**

**Kay: **_Thank you for your kind words. I thought Katsumoto was hilarious too. He will play a role and has actually already been mentioned in Instinct. _

**Guest: **_I think you need to re-read my stories. At no point has Rin been a pushover in my stories. Perhaps you are confusing her with how she is represented by other authors. _

**Estherale247:** _So glad I gave you soul shaking aftershocks! Yes that one was for you. Your review so touches on exactly what I am trying to do with my stories. I want my characters to experience real life, have real conversations and deal with the real issues that come with demon/human relationships. So glad someone appreciates them. _

**Guest:** _Life isn't fair. It was mentioned multiple times there is no taboo on male dog demons having more than one but there is for the female. Fair and equal are 21st century ideas that play no role in a story that takes place in Japan in the 1500's. _

**_Guest:_**_ Female demon? I have an idea for you. Lets see if I can make it happen and make it funny! Stay tuned._

**Consistent Guest:** _Thank you! I would love to do a chapter on their children's first words. Taiyomaru isn't old enough yet so i will have to decide between Yuki and Harutoga. I have ideas...I will get to them once I finish the Villa arc. _


	32. Feminine Attraction

**This was made by fan request...I had a rough day...I needed a good laugh. One of my guests wanted to know how Sesshomaru would react if he caught Rin with a female demoness. This should also answer Consistentguest's questions about Natsuki's sexual history. **

**Stupid poll...thank you other guest for bringing it to my attention that you couldn't vote. I went over it like 10x trying to figure out how to let guest readers vote and it didn't. FF only lets members. Lameness! I took it off. :(...Ok as I have mentioned on all my stories, a member of my family is having surgery in the morning. For the next few weeks, expect slow updates...I will try to keep writing but I don't know when I'll have time to post.**

**Feminine Attraction**

They left early in the morning on the seventh day of seclusion. Rin bade a small farewell and a thank you to Bukoseno who had watched Taiyomaru while she and Sesshomaru spent some much needed time away. The invisible servants who had provided them with all their needs were nowhere to be seen. Sesshomaru and Rin dressed plainly in the morning. It was the first time he had strapped his armor to his chest in a week. He was almost sad to say good-bye to the Villa. The bond wasn't quite where he had hoped it would be. It felt stable enough that he would be able to leave her and the children in a day and be vaguely aware of her emotions. He was unsure if he would be able to sense an intrusion. A one-way bond was different than when the yoki flowed both directions. Natsuki was a constant bundle in the back of his head. He rarely felt anything from her and knew her location had not changed since they left the castle. If he focused on that bundle, he could easily sense her emotions. But doing so was dangerous. If he spent too much time focusing on it, he would become enraptured by it again, unable to resist, lured in and that was where he and Rin had drew the line. Natsuki would not be part of their lives. He would not seek her out and she would keep her distance. Whatever his mother was teaching the younger dog demon was effective. She was keeping her emotions in check, distant from his senses.

After girding himself with his katanas and helping Rin put her own on, he lifted Taiyomaru into his mokomoko and wrapped his arms around Rin's waist, kissing her cheek, "ready?" He asked her.

"Yeah," she said, while yawning and stretching her muscles in the sun. It never ceased to astound him, just how beautiful Rin was. The sun shone down on her long black hair that she wore in a loose pony tail. It reached her bottom. A few more inches and it would be as long as his own. Her body was slender, yet thick with muscle all at the same time. Her skin had picked up a light tan while she had lived by the ocean. He lifted her off the ground floating into the air. As soon as he was clear of the treetops they would begin their journey home. It would take many hours and a few stops.

They spent most of the day flying back to their house by the field of daisies. Every few hours they stopped so Rin could feed Taiyomaru, relieve herself and stretch before they would start again. They had dried meats and fresh fruits for the trip back. They arrived close to nightfall. Sesshomaru landed by the private entrance in the back of the house. They were greeted by Akari. She waved them in.

"Chichiue!" Yuki shrieked excited running into his legs, hugging him around the waist.

"We missed you!" Harutoga leapt into his arms.

Sesshomaru passed Rin Taiyomaru just as Jaken came running up, spewing details about the scrolls they had received and that the Lords from the other four territories were waiting for him. They needed to discuss the southern border. The week would be spent negotiating peace with the ogres. With the scepter destroyed the Ogre King could no longer create more children. Sesshomaru groaned at the prospect of spending the rest of the day huddled inside the study. He passed his children treats, sweet rice and candies. "We train later," he pat their heads. He passed a brief look back at Rin.

She yanked his face down to his by the armor, capturing his lips, "go on. You have borders to maintain."

He pressed her palm to his heart and nuzzled her nose, "I will join you for dinner and to put the children in bed."

"Akari," Rin grinned, "go make some tea and have dinner prepared for us. Let Sesshomaru-sama know when it's ready."

The day passed quickly. The sunset faster than he had wanted. He joined the children for dinner. They told him about their time while he was away. He held Rin's hand in his. The training session was clipped due to lack of time. They played hide and seek, focusing on sensing yoki when it was masked and finding their father without the use of their noses. He helped her tuck the children into their beds. Taiyomaru fussed as he always did. He took the baby with him back to his study. When it was late he made love to Rin and held her until she fell asleep in his arms. There were more meetings to be had that he conducted throughout the night. Demons did not sleep like humans and he wanted to spend the few hours he had with his family when morning came.

They passed the daylight hours simply. Atsuko had dinner brought to their private garden. He and Rin soaked in the hot springs. As she always did, Rin washed his body. When they were finished, the children were invited in. He resumed teaching Yuki and Harutoga about their yoki, enhancing their sense of smell. Yuki was finally old enough to begin more fighting techniques. Harutoga worked on mastering his whip and simple flips, somersaults and cartwheels which he executed clumsily at first. Then they worked on learning to jump higher into the air. It was true his children would never be able to fly, but that didn't mean they wouldn't one day be able to jump fifty to a hundred feet into the air and control their descent should they fall from greater heights.

Rin bounced Taiyomaru in her lap laughing as the children trained until it was her turn against Sesshomaru. As usual he showed her no mercy. They finished by mid-morning. He knew it was time to leave. He held the one he loved close to his heart, kissing her lips, finding it difficult to let go of her. "I'll be home in a week," he murmured by her ear.

"I love you," she replied, deftly twisting her fingers into the hair at the back of his neck. Their lips met desperately.

"And I you," one more kiss and he knew it was time to leave. He knelt down and hugged Yuki and Harutoga, nuzzling their noses and giving them quick kisses on their cheeks.

"Bye Chichiue," Yuki squeezed him tight.

"Bye," Harutoga jumped on top of his father's shoulders. "Bring me back more sweet rice?"

"Behave for Ka-san and I will," he pat his son's head and flew away.

A ball of light formed next to Rin. Out of the light came a dog demon with long slender legs that were visible through her poorly closed yellow kimono. Her silver hair was tied back in a complicated French braid. The style made Natsuki look even younger than she usually did. She came without her son this time. The slit of her breasts was just visible over the top of her falling garment. She sauntered up to Rin, "is he gone?"

"Finally, I thought he would never leave," Rin giggled clasping Natsuki's hand. "Quick, let's go back to the bedroom." She ran excitedly with Natsuki through the public dining hall, past the kitchens and the washroom. Natsuki practically glided following after Rin. They ran like two school girls hiding from the headmaster.

As soon as they were in the bedroom Natsuki seized Rin by the back of her neck pressed her lips against the human's. Their tongues fought for dominance, as their hands grabbed each other's clothing. "He's such an old man," Rin complained. "He hovers like a mother hen."

"Why wouldn't he? With a mate as beautiful as you?" Natsuki chuckled pulling Rin down onto the bed. "But this hair is so beautiful. We don't often see such thick and luscious strands among our own kind," she tangled her white claws into Rin's tresses, brushing out the knots. She was just about to plant another steamy kiss on Rin's lips when she uttered, "oh shit." She stood up quickly.

"What?" Rin followed suit.

"He's coming," she held Rin's hand in hers.

"I thought you said he wouldn't sense us doing this?" Rin tried to contain her laughter.

"What are you two doing?" Sesshomaru landed in the garden bursting through the door. He had felt something, he was unsure what. A heat from both of his bonds as if both of them were involved in something that was not with him. He raged with jealously an anger.

Rin looked at Natsuki pursing her lips. Natsuki looked back suppressing her laughter. She inclined her neck over Rin's nipping at the exquisite skin that curved the human's neck. "Just having fun dear one," Natsuki chided him. Her claws danced over Rin's exposed shoulders as if they were playing the piano.

"I thought you liked it when we got along?" Rin turned into Natsuki's arms. They held each other by the elbows and gazed lustfully into each other's eyes.

"This does not look like _getting along," _Sesshomaru stammered out with a dry mouth and bulging eyes. He flexed his claws by his side. He had no idea what to think of the two of them. His jealousy was bubbling so hotly he could barely breathe.

"It doesn't?" Natsuki pouted her bottom lip out. "But the fun was just starting." She gave Rin a good tug back into her nearly exposed breast. "She's such a succulent human Sesshomaru. Perhaps we should share."

"Share?" He balked, coughing trying to clear his throat. If he had caught either one of them in the arms of another man, he would have killed the man and possibly them…this he couldn't wrap his head around.

"Yes, share," Gobodo-sama strode in from behind him. "Am I too late?" She pranced onto the red sheeted futon giving Natsuki and Rin a squeeze from behind.

"Of course not," Rin smiled at the elder dog demon, "we were just starting."

"Would you like to join us Sesshomaru?" Gobodo-sama chortled tickling the sides of the younger two females. "Hisato has no issue with this. Why should you?"

There were words, somewhere stuck in his throat. He knew they should have been there. He didn't know who to kill first, Natsuki for touching Rin, Rin for touching Natsuki, his mother for touching both of them, or himself to make it easier on everyone else. His heart was racing, a fire blazing in his chest. He dug his nails so hard into the palms of his hands, blood dripped onto the floor.

"I think he's shy," Rin covered her grin with her mouth. "Oh come on Sesshomaru stop looking so dumbfounded. Or at least leave, so we can have our fun in peace."

"Mother hen," Gobodo-sama stuck her tongue out at him and grabbed Rin's ass. "You've been working out." She rubbed her daughter-in-law's rump.

Rin returned the favor, gripping Gobodo-sama's backside and giving it a nice pinch, "so have you. It's firmer since last time."

"Let us have our fun dear one. Some of us were virgins when you bound us. We never got to have hundreds of years of fun the way you did," Natsuki licked Gobodo-sama's earlobe.

"He did that to you too? Ugh…He stopped me from sleeping with my childhood friend," Rin rolled her eyes frustrated. "Say something? Or leave. I want to have fun," she rubbed the sides of Gobodo-sama and Natsuki.

Where were the words? He couldn't form a coherent sentence. His thoughts jumbled. He felt light headed. Suddenly he jolted upright, sweating and gasping for air. His eyes adjusted quickly to the dark of the Villa. The light blanket fell to his waist. He rubbed his eyes with his palms. He needed to kill something, until he felt two hands wrap around his waist from behind and lips against the side of his neck, "what's wrong? Did you have a nightmare?" Rin's hair splayed over her shoulder half blocking her eyes. Her eyes drooped lightly as she ran her fingers up and down the muscles of his stomach.

"This Sesshomaru does not have nightmares," the words dripped like poison from his lips. He shoved Rin onto her back, climbing on top of her. He wedged her legs open and pushed himself inside of her, grunting at the warmth and the way she clenched against the sudden invasion. "You are mine," he thrusted within her, holding her wrists over her head. He kissed her mouth until her lips bruised, "I will share you with no one." _Male or female. _

"S…s…so, oh kami," she lifted her hips to meet his, "is you…not…having, oh," she stammered, "having a nightmare?" She finally got the sentence out. His fingers found her clit, circling it pleasantly. "Okay," she wrapped her arms around his chest.

"Mine," he let his hips roll into her. And he meant it. He would not share her…900 years old and he finally had his first nightmare.

**Please review! I'm hiding in a corner waiting to have fish thrown at me for using Natsuki. I can't help it, I love her character.**

**Guest: **_I get where you are coming from. I don't think Rin let it go personally. She basically made it clear that she would only stay with him as long as Natsuki keeps her distance. _

**Guest:** _Yes this part is a bit repetitive but just a reminder this story has no plot planned. It's all about conversations, not an actual plot line as their relationship progresses. Thank you for saying my lemons are lame. Half the reason I wrote this arc was to work on how I write them. Apparently I need to keep working on it! I'm going to write one more for before they leave or after they have left. If you've read some awesome Lemons you love please recommend some so I can get some more inspiration. I really want to highlight how much I like your critical review and I am so glad you left it._

**Guest:** _Ugh that stupid POLL...I checked the settings and there is no way for me to change it so everyone can vote. I would say base off my reviews the majority are guest readers. Oh well...stupid fanfiction not allowing non-members to participate. _

**Consistentguest:** _At the moment I can't write the one shot. She was a virgin. In Natsuki's Bond and Rin's Birth in Instinct it says that he had to cut through her hymen. He stops at one part and says, "You haven't done this before." She was only 352 years old. In my stories maturity comes at 400 years old. She jumped the gun by 50 or so years...and no he wouldn't let anyone be with her._


	33. Last Day in the Villa, First Day Home

**Thank you all so much for the reviews. This is the last edition of the Villa. I am going to go back and try to get through some of the requests as I am able. Going forward will be a slow build up to the disease. There are certain characters I am introducing in order to use them in the disease. it's kind of fun getting to know them like this first. Basically five years from this setting a monk named Yashida will begin to slowly spread the disease. I think we all know who one of the first victims are. I really want to build up Sesshomaru and Inuyasha's relationship to make it that much more painful for him when he loses his brother. **

**Sesshomaru's reaction to Rin in the future will be inside the Disease. The same story will outline and explain how he became a doctor. Rin and Sess's reaction to her aging more slowly will also be in the Disease so that takes care of about 3 requests. Please wait patiently.**

**That just leaves finishing up the story between Gobodo-sama and Hisato. Yuki's first love will partially be answered in the end of the Disease and also afterwards. I will also try to write Harutoga and Taiyomaru's first words. As well as Eshterale247's Sess as a father moment. I have been revamping Lost Memories so you see more of him being a father then. **

**Katsumoto was mentioned in Instinct. Leave a review if you know who he will become LOL. It's kind of funny. **

**Finally, this chapter was inspired by a class I took on sexual assault counseling. It's a heavy chapter. People have asked how Rin could forgive Sesshomaru. They discuss it below. We also deal with the after effects of her nearly being raped by Touma and see closure to the previous story arc and something else. This one might be a tear jerker. Sorry...**

**And the Lemon is a bit graphic...more graphic than I have written in the past but I wanted to show Rin moving past her fears from what Touma did to her. **

**********personal announcement*****alas I must be on a hiatus for a bit. I just started school again. I'm taking a creative writing course and Psychology of Intimate relationships. They are 8 week courses, which basically means we jam 14 weeks of info into 8 weeks. I haven't taken more than one class at a time in years so my focus needs to change a bit from working on my fanfiction back to my education. If I am able to write, I will be posting one chapter a week to each story. Since there are four stories I'm currently adding to that means each story most likely will get 1 chapter a month for at least the next 2 months. If I can do more I will. That's why this chapter is sooo long. To keep you all busy.**

**Last Day in the Villa First Day Home**

He rolled over in his sleep finding an empty bed. The futon was chilled where he had expected it to be warm. Taiyomaru was nowhere in sight. For a moment again, that bone chilling fear that she had decided she would be better off without him returned. He bolted upright, heart racing only to find the door to the Villa was left open and Rin was in the courtyard practicing forms with her sword. He stilled his heart, aggravated that she was able to do that to him. _Fear, I do not experience fear. Except with her. _He exhaled deeply, calming the thundering of his heart, reminding himself with his eyes that at that moment she was out there, her feet prancing along the shadows of the trees as she whipped her sword into the air. She was gorgeous and deadly. Even without the katana, her grasp of hand to hand combat was perhaps the best he had seen.

He rose the rest of the way off the futon and garbed himself in his white hikama. There was a bowl of meat stewing in its own blood next to their bed. He ate a few pieces filling the empty void in his stomach, then unsheathed Tenseiga stalking to Rin. When he was in striking distance, he raised the sword, aiming for her middle. She blocked it lithely. He raised it again aiming for head, she parried. He aimed for her legs, then the dance began. He was of course faster than her, but as they moved back and forth along the ivory courtyard, he noticed her speed had picked up. He increased his to match and even out do hers. She kicked at his legs, he leapt aside. He swung the sword at her neck, she bent backwards almost bending her body in half. Her hands landed on the ground as she used the momentum to kick her heel into his chin. She missed, just barely. "You know, we never talked about it," he said mid-fight, slamming Tenseiga onto her wrist.

She activated the whip in her sword to stop his before it connected with her skin. "About what?" She hated when he talked during battle. It was a distraction. She let the whip loose, making it twist and turn, forcing him off the ground and into the air to avoid being hit.

"Me taking more than one female," he yelled from the tree tops twisting and turning to miss the snake-like energy emanating from her katana.

"Why do you have to bring that up?" She grunted as he let loose his own energy whip nearly pulling her feet out from beneath her.

"Because this Sesshomaru does not understand your reaction to it," he landed next to her catching her by the elbow before she hit the ground. The last thing he wanted was for her to crack her head open again. "This happens in the human world…I do not understand how you behaved."

"Which part? The part where I left you? Or the part where I was horrible to you?" Rin pushed him back when he tried to kiss her.

"The part where you left me," he sat down on a log, bare chest sparkling in the sunlight. He shook his head, righting the hair that hung over his chest.

"Your hair is a mess," Rin laughed sheathing her katana. She went into the hut and emerged with a brush and several pieces of string to tie his hair. She sat down behind him and began detangling it. "Did you have another nightmare?"

He didn't answer.

"You don't usually look this disheveled," she kissed his bare shoulder.

"You are avoiding the conversation," he said tersely. "You were not in bed when I woke," the words came out under his breath.

"I'm antsy," Rin started on the hair that was by his middle. "I needed to get some energy out. I woke up before the sun came up with Taiyomaru. Then I took him to Bukoseno and came back to practice. I left the door open so you would see me if you woke up before I came back to bed. You were sleeping so soundly I didn't want to bother you," she tugged on a particularly nasty knot near his shoulders. She set the brush in her lap and started detangling it with her fingers. "I thought we were different."

He remained quiet, waiting for her to add onto her words.

"I thought," she pursed her lips, "that we were above you needing more than one. We do it to produce heirs, for political gain, for many things, hardly for love. Sesshomaru, I thought our love was eternal, unbreakable, that we were above such folly."

He snorted. If there was one thing he was not, he was not above his instincts. He felt his head bob backwards harshly. "Is that annoyance?"

"You ask me a question and then you say nothing in response," she tugged again, "and this is a very nasty knot." She resumed trying to loosen the strands of hair that had gotten tangled.

"It was never my intention to have two. I had considered it in the beginning perhaps. You were right that I would have never felt fulfilled if I had not left behind at least one pureblooded child. Why do you forgive me?"

"I could ask you the same question," she finally freed the last strands of hairs. "You must be stressed. Your hair only gets knotted when you are upset," she ruffled the back of his hair knowing how much it made him angry. She lifted the ivory brush he had bought her long ago and smoothed the strands on his crown. "I'm braiding your hair."

"I hate when you braid it," he grumbled.

"I'm putting flowers in it too," she parted his silver mane into four equal bunches.

"I am not a female," he cast an annoyed glance over his shoulder. "You are stalling again Rin. Why do you forgive me?"

"But you are my demon lover," she wrapped her arms around his waist, pressing her lips into the skin of his shoulder. "We were manipulated. All of us, you, me, Natsuki. Touma used our bond against us. He knew the way I loved you. He knew that because I am human and deep down most of us don't want our husband's taking a second wife, it would hurt me. Even if it is rather common. It wasn't really common in Kaede's village. Satsu's mother had a rival wife, they hated each other. Kaede-sama only approved of them, if it meant saving a girl from becoming an orphan. Like one girl when I was fifteen, her family was killed by demons before Inuyasha could get there. Kaede-sama didn't want her to live alone, so she found her a husband. The only problem was, he already had a wife, but the girl and the wife were friends and decided it would be best. They had fought over the boy a year before the first one married him. In the end they were happy. I just thought we weren't like that. Because you're yokai, that somehow it meant that you would love me and only me. I'm rambling…sorry."

Sesshomaru laughed still holding Rin's hands, "return to my hair." How she knew how to relax him.

She sat up straighter and parted his hair again. She began braiding it carefully, "I was upset. That's why I left. I knew you would pester me and not give me time to think. You do that whenever we fight. You get even more possessive and don't give me personal space. I forgive you because I know it wasn't your fault and the way you are made, even Natsuki couldn't resist it. You were like two blind magnets to each other. I can't hold that against her or against you. Afterwards, I would have thought you a greater coward for walking away from her and your son altogether. I don't know. I forgive you because I love you and because you've promised me that you won't approach her again while I am alive."

"Do you trust me?"

"I'm trying to," she tied the end of his hair. The braid was thick and long, going past his bottom. She rose off the log and pushed herself up near his knees where he straddled it. "I'm sorry I left the way I did."

He nodded. "I am sorry. I could not resist my instinct to bed her the day you met her, or that I did not tell you sooner of what happened."

"I hate your brother," Rin laughed breaking the tense moment. "It was the perfect plan wasn't it?"

"He was always like that. It would have been better if Touma was born a snake yokai," he ran his hand up and down Rin's thigh.

She tensed at the touch, shifting uncomfortably.

"Did he do more than you have told me?" He asked concerned that her body was still reacting to his touches.

She got off the log and walked away rubbing her arms. "I hate when you use Tenseiga to spar with me," the subject was avoided again. "It's demeaning."

"Rin, you tense when I touch your thighs the way I just did. You won't let me make love to you from behind. You know it brings us both more pleasure that way," he went after her taking her hand. "Did he do more to you? Did he rape you?" He held her chin in the crook between his thumb and index finger.

"I don't want to talk about it," she took her sword back out. "Can we just train please? Sesshomaru?" Her voice cracked. Her eyes watered, "please?" She raised her sword at him, "just train. Don't ask me for more than that."

He ground his teeth, half frustrated and half broken hearted. She was hiding something from him. He threw Tenseiga aside, "Bakusaiga, come," he commanded his white hilted sword. It flashed into his outstretched fingers. "It will hurt if you fail to block my attack."

This time she was the quiet one. Her eyes were fire, her hair flew in the wind as she looked at him.

They spent the rest of the morning sparring until Sesshomaru heard Taiyomaru screaming his head off. He sent Rin into the Villa to change into a clean kimono and prepare for their trip back. As he headed in the direction of the ancient magnolia forest he stopped beneath a tall tree. Without glancing up he called, "Hisato!"

The black haired dog demon descended several branches until he was hunched just feet over Sesshomaru's head, still hidden by leaves. Even though the Villa was in eyeshot he was sure she wouldn't be able to see him.

"Did Touma rape her?" Sesshomaru asked seething with anger.

"I don't know. He had not finished the deed when I left her," Hisato sat back on the tree branch. "She's strong Sesshomaru-sama, give her time."

"What happened in the forest?" He had asked his mother, Hisato and even the children. He had a fair picture but something was missing.

"It was his goal to rape her. When I left her, he had cut the inside of her thighs," the younger inu-yokai admitted remorsefully. "Is something wrong Sesshomaru-sama?"

"You should not have left her," he snarled at the sentinel.

"If I hadn't your children would be dead," Hisato chastised him. "I held back two transformed dog demons and five ogres that were hunting your children and died in the process. Do not take my sacrifice for your family so lightly just because your mother revived me with your sword!"

He knew Hisato was right. Had he and Jaken not held off the horde that was hunting his children, they would be dead. He made the proper choice, even if it left Rin vulnerable. "She knew what she was doing when she asked me to leave," Hisato added tersely.

"Return to your post. Is your wayward cousin still flying around?"

Hisato sniffed the air, "not that I can tell. Why?"

"When I return with her, you will instruct him where to find our home and have him swear his allegiance on the black stone," Sesshomaru resumed his walk to the tree. "He will take Hideyoshi's place."

"Yes Sesshomaru-sama," Hisato flew back into the trees to find a perch near the Villa.

Sesshomaru held Taiyomaru in his mokomoko as they soared through the skies to their home. It would take most of the day and he wanted to make a stop in Kaede's village. He thought that speaking to Inuyasha and Kagome might help him find the answers to what he was seeing. Rin remained quiet on his back. Her head lolled slightly against the back of his armor. He wrapped the end of his mokomoko around her waist just in case. He focused on their connection, sensing her emotions. He didn't have a name for what she was feeling. There was anxiety, fear, sorrow, depression. "Are you awake?" He said quietly, not wanting to disturb her had she fallen asleep.

There was no answer. He assumed that Rin had succumb to her exhaustion. He had driven her hard that morning. He nearly did slice into the skin in her stomach before stopping himself while they sparred. He lifted one hand up to hold the one that rested on his shoulder. _What did he do to you? What aren't you telling this Sesshomaru?_

They landed hours later in Kaede's village. He still called it that. The village had no name before. He stalked with Rin on his back into the forest where he knew their hut was. Kagome said that she did not have nursing school over the summer. She promised the village to return and care for their needs. "Oi Sesshomaru, what are you doing here?" Inuyasha jumped out of the bushes.

"Quiet," Sesshomaru held a finger to his mouth. He pointed to Rin sleeping on his back.

"Come on. You can put her in the hut. Why are you here?" Inuyasha's hand rested nervously on Tetsusaiga's hilt.

"I," he faltered unsure how to begin the conversation. "Has your Miko ever been…" He stopped walking and closed his eyes. He looked over his shoulder to ensure that Rin was still asleep on his back. "In your absence, was the Miko raped?"

"What? Did that bastard rape Rin?" Inuyasha fumed.

"I'm unsure," Sesshomaru followed his younger brother. "He did something to her. Something is bothering her."

"I'm sure a lot is bothering her, come in," Inuyasha held the flap up. He motioned Sesshomaru to a mat at the end of the hut. He set Rin down, stroking her cheek to keep her asleep. Taiyomaru struggled against his chest. "Quiet little one," he rubbed the baby's cheek until he dozed off again.

"How is my nephew?"

Sesshomaru rose off the wooden floor and exited the hut. He opened his mokomoko enough for Inuyasha to see. "Growing."

"And my other new nephew you told me nothing about? What's his name?" His arms were folded defensively over his chest.

"His name is Tsukimaru. He is the same size as he was the last time you saw him. Like a newborn although he is nearly four months old."

"I can't believe you did that," Inuyasha sat down on the porch. "I can't believe she forgave you."

Sesshomaru only rolled his eyes.

"So you aren't going to try to kill me for helping her get away from you?" Inuyasha flicked the dirt with the claws on his toes.

"You were protecting her," Sesshomaru answered. "It was what was best for her. Oddly I appreciate it."

"Kagome never experienced sexual violence. That's what they call it in her time. Not that I know of anyway. I can ask her to talk to Rin though. Did something happen in the forest? We only got there at the end," Inuyasha reminded him.

"How did you know to come? I do not remember telling you that Touma was behind the plan to tear us apart," he still didn't understand that part.

"I don't know. Kagome was out with a friend then came back and said we had to go because she wanted to kill Touma. She was still really pissed at him for killing me."

"O-ni-sama!" Kagome called from the hill just above the home. She picked up her pace with Mayumi and Izayoi following behind her.

"Ojisama!" Mayumi waved in the air.

"How old are they now?" Sesshomaru asked.

"Mayumi is seven. Izayoi is twelve," Inuyasha said proudly watching his daughters run up to him.

"To-san can we train with Ojisama?" Mayumi threw her hand into the air, "sankan tesou!" White blades that were smaller than her father's flew from her nails and smashed into a nearing tree.

Sesshomaru smiled proudly knowing it was he who had taught her that.

"Sesshomaru?" Rin came out slowly from the inside of the hut rubbing her eyes. She sat down next to him. "What are we doing here?"

"Visiting," he held her hand. "We'll leave in a few hours. Miko would you host us for a meal?" It was mid-afternoon long past lunch and too early for dinner.

"I'd love to," Kagome hugged Rin, "it's good to see you. Come inside we can talk."

"Kagome," Inuyasha took her hand and tugged her into his chest, "Sesshomaru thinks Touma may have raped Rin," he whispered quietly in her ear. He removed his head from her thick hair and said, "sorry Rin. I just needed to tell her something privately."

"I understand." Rin leaned against her demon lover.

Kagome's face paled as she held his hand. "What do you want me to do?"

"Talk to her. Sesshomaru is worried," he kissed her earlobe playfully.

"I'm not a psychologist," Kagome hissed back quietly.

"Do you two need a minute?" Rin stood up. "I need to relieve myself anyway. I think I'll go visit Sango and Miroku and their kids. Is Hisato hiding somewhere?" Rin asked at Sesshomaru.

"No. I sent him to recall his annoying cousin to join us at our home," he wasn't happy about that but Rin had made a good point. They needed someone stronger.

Rin answered with a chuckle. "Come on girls. I want to catch up," she grasped Mayumi and Izayoi's hands.

When she was gone Kagome repeated herself, "look I'm not a psychologist."

"A what?" Sesshomaru balked.

"Someone who helps people who has emotional problems. But I know someone I could talk to on the other side of the Well. You can't just flat out ask someone if they were raped. What's going on?"

Sesshomaru groaned staring at his brother whom he would have preferred not hear about their personal troubles but then again he had felt comfortable enough to share his suspicions before. "She trembles at my touch at times. She is having nightmares again. Hisato said Touma had been trying to rape her when he left her. I found her nearly naked and injured before she took the blow from the Halberd. I fear she isn't telling me for fear of upsetting me."

"I'm sorry Oni-sama. I know the last few months have been really hard on the two of you and your family," Kagome put her bow and arrows down on the porch. "I'll go talk to my brother and see if he has any suggestions. I'll be back in a bit. Inuyasha can cook you lunch?"

"Woman," Sesshomaru glared at his brother.

"Not all of us have servants at our beckon call," Inuyasha motioned him into the hut. "Come on. What does she like? I have some fish, meat, rice?"

"Fish and rice," the older brother answered, pleasantly surprised to find comradery with his younger brother.

Kagome emerged from the well. Long before she had asked her mother to spruce up the old shack a bit. It was getting annoying at thirty three. Her knees weren't quite what they used to be and she found her body rebelling the slightest bit. She even had grey wisps of hair around her face, something she wasn't very happy about. The shack now had tiled flooring and electricity. The roof had been properly shingled to keep it dry. There was a bed off to the side, a washer and a dryer so she didn't have to launder her clothes in the Feudal Era and a phone with its own number. It was basically a studio apartment for her and her family when they came to visit. The kids slept in the main house and she and Inuyasha enjoyed some much needed quiet. She went to the phone and dialed Sesshomaru. It went to his voicemail as it always did, "hey it's me. I wanted to talk to you about Rin. Don't worry I killed Touma a few weeks ago but they are in the village and you're worried. Was she really raped? Call me back. Bye."

She sat down on the nearby counter and kicked her legs back and forth waiting for the phone to ring. Without fail ten minutes later it sounded off. She picked it up almost falling off the counter as she did, "hey. So was Rin raped by Touma?"

"Define rape," his tenor came from the other end of the phone.

"Really?"

"Really. If it was an act of penile penetration-"

"Oh my god Sesshomaru really?"

"Your brother looks at vaginas for a living Kagome, at your age you should be used to the words penis and vagina. If I'm not mistaken as the village midwife you look at many women's vaginas often."

"Shut up! Seriously you need therapy," she wanted to break the phone.

"And what therapist would I see? I can imagine it now, doctor please help me? I'm a fourteen hundred year old pureblooded dog demon that watched my entire species get wiped out by a virus, buried my one true love-"

"Okay I get the point…fine what does it matter what you were saying?"

"Kagome do you remember when you called me when you were sixteen? There was a part of your adventures in the Edo era that began to haunt you, what was it?" His tone had become kinder.

"Mukotsu," even remembering that bastard's name made her hand tremble. Suddenly she understood what he was saying. "I didn't think I had been violated at first. You came because you smelled my fear and something else."

"You know the one thing I have always despised above anything else is rape, which to me includes any kind of unwanted penetration. Rin was not raped by my brother. But he did put his fingers where they didn't belong, in the process slicing a second degree laceration, if I remember the extent of it correctly on the inside of her vaginal canal extending to the outer labia. It was very painful for her physically."

"She hasn't said anything," Kagome said deflated.

"Neither did you. Can you think why?"

"I was embarrassed and mortified someone had touched me like that and you saw it! I never even told Inuyasha. He doesn't know. Should I tell him?"

"It's your relationship. If you wish to help Rin, speak to her as someone else who was touched in a way they didn't want. You have to remember that rape was a way of life back then. Women had no rights, no voice, no hope. The night thieves we read about, you and I have seen murder, pillage and destroy entire villages."

"You think she doesn't know it was a violation?"

"Most likely she took it in stride thinking it wouldn't affect her the way it did. I remember afterwards she was timid if I touched the inside of her thighs or if I tried to make love to her from behind," there was a pause from his side, "I'm needed. Speak to her woman to woman. I'm sure you'll find the right words. Syonara."

Kagome put the phone back on the charger. "Okay…great I haven't told anyone about this," she jumped back down the Well. She came out the other side and hiked to Miroku and Sango's hut. It was overrun with children. Their twin girls were already married, expecting their own children. Their eldest son was engaged and apprenticing with Kohaku to be a slayer. Then there was child after child after that. "Hey Rin!" Kagome called to her.

Rin held her son in her arms along with one of Sango's smaller children. "It's like child heaven here," the younger woman chortled.

"Can I talk to you?" Kagome motioned her out of the hut. "Alone, but give me this little guy," she took Taiyomaru who immediately squawked in her arms loudly. "Or maybe not." Kagome passed him back to Rin.

"Don't feel bad. He does the same thing for me," Rin tried to be light hearted about it.

Together they went into the forest. They stopped by the lake where Rin used to bathe with the young girls. It was abandoned and quiet. "Rin what happened with Touma?"

"He brought me here so he could talk to you didn't he? Dammit," Rin cursed throwing a smooth stone into the lake. It skipped three times before sinking.

"I had something happen once. You remember the Band of Seven. Mukotsu held Sango, Miroku and I prisoner. He poisoned us. I tried to get away but I couldn't. Sango and Miroku were unconscious but he touched me, down there," she felt like a child not being able to say the word like the nurse she was training to be. She could say it medically but it was almost painful to admit that he had fingered her. "He put his fingers in me. I was crying. I thought he was going to go all the way. Then Sesshomaru killed him. You weren't there but he told me he did it because he abhors rape."

"But he didn't rape you. It was just his fingers," Rin argued bouncing Taiyomaru. "That's not rape."

"It is, because I didn't want it. I didn't give him consent to touch me like that. Well maybe it's not a classic rape but it was still assault. It took me a while when I was sixteen to get over it. I started having nightmares. I would break out in sweats, my heart would race. I finally told a friend who helped me understand that I was having a reaction to something I hadn't dealt with. I mean Touma cut you-"

"Did he tell you that? I told him not to tell anyone!" Rin burst into tears, "that was private! No one was supposed to know!"

"Oh shit," Kagome smacked her forehead. "He didn't tell me! Well he did tell me…oh gosh."

"I'm going to kill him," Rin attempted to storm back to Kagome's hut.

"Wait, fuck…I'm not supposed to talk about this. Look your Sesshomaru didn't tell me," she kept an iron clad grip on Rin's arm to keep her from killing the demon she loved.

"You are making no sense," Rin's mouth fell open. "He's there isn't he? In your future."

Kagome nodded, "you cannot tell Sesshomaru. It's not Sota I talk to, it's him. Well I talk to Sota sometimes but he could only manage to work for Sesshomaru for one clinical rotation. That's like an apprenticeship. Sesshomaru drove him crazy. He found me when I was fifteen, that's how I knew about Touma. Oh gosh your mouth is hanging open."

"What's he like?"

"A mopey lovesick puppy-dog," Kagome laughed sitting back down by the lake. "He misses you so much."

Rin sat down next to her.

"He's a doctor. He cures horrible diseases. He spends most of his time in Osaka near your home. I spent a lot of time training with him on that side. It's how I was able to keep in practice using my spiritual power. His power is terrifying. I could probably take out Sesshomaru now, but Sesshomaru in my time? I don't think anyone could."

"I always knew he would sit and mourn and not move on. It's his way. He's very sentimental even if he doesn't act like it," Rin kissed Taiyomaru. "I knew something was up. I wish I could see him, tell him that moving on is okay."

"I don't think he would listen. He as stubborn as always. Inuyasha doesn't know, no one does. You can't tell anyone."

"Okay," Rin exhaled hugging her baby. "I hate this feeling. Touma ruined everything. We were so happy before. How could you seal his bond to me knowing what was going to happen?"

"I didn't know everything. He came to me when I was fifteen years old Rin and I remember like nothing from that conversation besides not to interfere between him and Natsuki. We never talked about it again until I was having coffee with him while we were hiding from Sesshomaru here and he told me that Touma was the one behind it all. Kami I wanted to hill that bastard for what he did to Inuyasha and Sesshomaru tells me, 'you did'. I literally bolted from the coffee shop, down the well with Inuyasha behind me, grabbed Kirara and we left. I couldn't wait to fry that bastard," Kagome threw a pile of dirt into the lake.

"Have you met her on that side?" Rin asked curiously.

"I can't really say. If there is one thing he has been for the last fifteen years, it's cautious. He is really careful with what he tells me. I don't really know that much about what happened to you, to my kids, to your kids, Sango, Miroku. I know he has grandchildren and great-grandchildren. You can't tell Lord I Hate Humans that he becomes a human doctor. He would refuse just to spite himself."

"My lips are sealed. I love him so much. I don't know how to talk to him about this. He knows something is bothering me," Rin's eyes became distant as she stared across the lake. "I don't even feel like I have a right to complain. Satsu was raped in that forest and her throat slit in front of my eyes. It wasn't even one man, it was three. I just had someone put their fingers up me and slice my insides. He healed it anyway or else I would have scarring on my wrist and well…" she glanced down at the apex of her legs. "It hurt like hell when healed it. He had to touch the cut. Imagine that? While we were still trying to recover what was broken."

"I'm surprised you forgave him," Kagome growled, "I wouldn't forgive Inuyasha."

"Inuyasha wasn't being manipulated by his demented half-brother from hell. Pure-blooded demons have no choice. Or at least Dog-demons. I don't remember this kind of attraction happening between Koga and Ayame," Rin put her toes in the water, opening them and closing them against the small waves. "Sota definitely hasn't lost all of his senses with Sayako. Sayako doesn't seem like a female in heat."

Kagome choked and blinked her eyes.

"Oh no really?" Rin let out a loud laugh.

"You guys haven't been around. Sayako is climbing the walls right now and attracting just about every male in a five mile vicinity. Koga had to put her in isolation in a cave or she would take any male to scratch her itch. Normally there is a wedding for wolf-demons and the expectation is that the female remains pure, but Sota left after he came here to get some medicine for you. He took Aun and is going to be with her. Kind of weird knowing in a few days my oldest isn't going to be a virgin anymore," Kagome burst out laughing again. "She's probably going to get pregnant which means I'll be a grandmother by thirty four…Kami that is so weird."

"How old are grandmothers in your time?"

"Fifty, sixty, seventy, not thirty four," she rubbed her temples in circular motions. "I thought you were sick?"

"I think he figured out how to manipulate his bond to me and make my body respond faster to being sick. I fell asleep horribly sick and woke up the next day after sleeping for nearly half a day completely well. He didn't say anything," she became distant again. Her hand traveled down to her hips. "I hate this." It was as if she could still feel Touma's hands on her.

"Rin it's okay what you're feeling," she hugged the younger woman around the shoulders. "Touma might as well have raped you. Cutting you up like that. It's not normal. Just because you and I know so many women and young girls who have experienced that kind of violence. We talk about it as midwives remember? We could always tell because they were the ones most fearful while giving birth or the ones that came to us after they get married because they are afraid of their husband's touch?"

"He touches my thigh and I jump. I don't mind his fingers. I know he won't hurt me. But when he tries to make love to me from behind, I can't anymore. All I feel is Touma trying to force himself in me. He didn't. It was close. I could feel it on the inside of my thigh. I kept him from going any farther than that. It was terrifying. I was afraid," she paused searching the line of trees in the forest. "I was afraid you wouldn't come for me."

"I'll always come for you," Sesshomaru came out from behind the pine trees.

"How much of that did you hear?" Kagome's heart was racing.

"Just that you said Touma might as well have raped her. My heart, what happened?" He held her hand in his, completely ignoring Kagome. "What did he do to you?"

Rin could melt whenever he referred to her in that way.

"I'll leave you two alone," Kagome squeezed Rin's fingers and returned in the direction of her home.

Slow tears snaked their way down her cheeks. "He didn't…" she wiped her eyes. She passed Taiyomaru to him and stood up.

Sesshomaru wrapped the wiggling almost six month old in against his shoulder and towed Rin into a tight embrace. He kissed her forehead, before laying another chaste one against her lips, "what did he do to you?"

"Just what I told you," she held onto the material of his white haori that was bunched against the top of his armor. "He was Higan, then he changed and…he was on top of me," she attempted to turn away from him.

"Do not turn from this Sesshomaru," he tenderly forced her face back to his.

"I tried getting away. The way you showed me, but I couldn't. I got my legs and torso loose, but he still had my hands and then he was on top of my back," her shoulders spasmed involuntarily. "I couldn't get him off. I could feel him pressing against my thigh. It was so close. I was so tired. My wrist hurt so badly," she rubbed the hand that had been lacerated by Touma in an attempt to get her to drop her katana. She hid her face from Sesshomaru's searching gaze, "it's not you. It's him. I…c…c…can't see your face. My mind takes me back there."

"Shh," he muttered next to her ear. He caressed her back lovingly. "It's alright. I'm sorry," he kissed her lips holding her close to him.

"Be patient with me? I know you like when I'm on all fours," she returned his kiss.

"What scares you the most? That you can't see me?" He attempted to clean her cheeks of her tears.

She nodded her head.

"You really thought this Sesshomaru wouldn't come?" That had been a bone of contention for him, that in a moment of pure need, her faith in him had been so shattered.

"I was so awful to you. Why would you?" She coughed catching her breath.

He snorted holding in a languid laugh. She was horrible. He held her until the tears stopped and her shoulders stopped trembling. "I have an idea. Do you trust this Sesshomaru?" His eyes were entirely devilish.

"Yes," it was true. She knew he would never maim her body even while they made love.

"Then tonight we will face whatever this is after we return. Come. Inuyasha finished your meal. It actually smells edible."

"Sesshomaru!" She rebuked him.

"For a hanyou," he held her hand.

"You fathered three of them."

"Mine are stronger," he said confidently.

"And brattier," she added.

"That too."

They arrived back at their home long after sunset. Hisato and Katsumoto waited outside the door to the private entrance with Gobodo-sama who held the hands of their eldest children. As soon as he landed, Sesshomaru and Rin were rushed and tackled by Yuki and Harutoga. They held onto the parents with tears streaming down their cheeks. "Why did you leave!" Yuki yelled at her mother. "I woke up and you were gone!"

"I needed to ask some answers from an old tree," Rin kissed her daughter's cheek. "Were you good?"

"Of course not," Gobodo-sama laughed gracefully gliding foreword on her long slender legs, "I would be concerned if she was. She destroyed seven rooms in my home with her poison. Didn't you Yuki?"

Rin couldn't tell if Gobodo-sama was proud or appalled. "I hope you apologized," she rebuked her daughter.

"Why would I? It's her fault for not listening to me. I said I wanted to come home," Yuki snarled at her grandmother.

Sesshomaru stood up and nodded at Jaken who carried an armload of scrolls.

"Jaken it can wait," Sesshomaru dismissed the toad. "The next hour is for my family. I will meet with you after that. Yuki, Harutoga, Rin," he took her hand in his. "We go to the garden. Akari, bring us supper and a treat for Yuki and Harutoga."

"Is that all Sesshomaru? No thank you for your mother?" Gobodo-sama leaned into Hisato's waiting arms. "Dear one, shall we retire to your room?"

"Hisato, you will train Katsumoto to take Hideyoshi's place as the sentinel that protects the outside of the home and the children. Now." Sesshomaru added.

"You are evil. Let him spend time alone with your mother," Rin poked his ribs as they entered their home.

"I do not approve of their relationship," he snarled back.

"It's none of your business," Rin reminded him.

"He's younger than this Sesshomaru!"

Rin grabbed his face and kissed his lips until he nearly feel backwards against the wall. "You're a ridiculous man."

"I am not a man."

"No," Rin smiled holding his face, "you're my demon lover. Now let them be alone."

Gobodo-sama straddled Hisato's lap panting lightly, "that was fun. Catch your breath."

"How is it you have so much stamina?" He pushed her off, covered in sweat. He pulled her to his chest with a light grin on his face. He wiggled one of the shells on top of her head, "you do not act your age."

"Why should I," she chuckled grabbing his face and kissing him until he couldn't breathe. "We don't have long before my son comes pounding the door down asking you to train that ridiculous cousin of yours. How did he get him to come here?"

"He tried to steal Rin," Hisato ran the back of his fingers down her side as she cuddled against him.

"Did my son remember who Katsumoto's mother is?" She laughed openly.

"Not until I told him," Hisato pressed his lips to his lover's forehead. "The first woman to bed him and her son comes and tries to steal his lover. Poetic."

"Yasuko would have loved if that had produced a child. That's why she kept him around as a consort for nearly a century but he had no idea how to wield his yoki in that away. And not interest then in becoming a father," she stretched next to Hisato.

"You should visit more often. The distance," he placed his hand over his heart, "aches."

"Oh you're so sentimental. You could have just bonded me from the beginning," she slapped his shoulder playfully.

"And miss you using me as a pawn in your games?" He pressed his mouth to hers.

"You only returned my bond to protect yourself from Touma's games. Do you regret it?"

"No," he nuzzled her nose while caressing the lightening stripe on her cheek. "No."

"Did the week alone do what he wanted it to?"

"And here you go prying into your son's business again," he sat up knowing exactly where she planned to take the conversation. He reached for his black hikama on the floor of his room.

She sat up wrapping her arms around his waist, "shall we play a game?" Her claws circled the middle of his chest lightly drawing blood.

"Does this game involve me divulging information that is not allowed?"

"Of course," her hands travelled south, down his abs.

"I am not up for a fourth time," he pushed her hands off.

"But I am," she whined biting on the point of his ear to turn his head back.

"You are a seducing temptress," he shoved her shoulders back onto the bed, "one that I am in l…"

She covered his mouth, "oh please not that. Anything but that. Anymore and you'll sound like him."

There was scuffling and voices next door. Hisato tried to open his mouth again only to have her more forcefully cover it.

"Since when did you get a room so close to theirs? Quiet," she tilted her pointed ears to listen to what was going on in the other room.

"_Dare I ask what he wanted all these mirrors for?" Akari's voice sounded in the hallway._

_"__I don't know," Rin answered softly. _Gobodo-sama grinned hearing the soft coos of Taiyomaru.

_"__You know you're lucky," Atsuko said._

_"__Why is that?" Rin answered sounding happy._

_"__Not everyone attached to a pure-blooded yokai has three children so quickly," Atsuko said happily._

_"__Four," Rin's voice dropped._

"Damned humans," Gobodo-sama jumped off the bed and grabbed her inner layer. "Did you hear that?"

"It will set her off," Hisato pulled his own clothes on.

"Stall my son. If she feels whatever it is strong enough, it will disturb his meeting. Tell him I will speak with her," she tied her second layer on leaving the rest while looping her many mokomokos back over her shoulders.

_"__Forgive me Rin-sama," the human sounded deflated. "Yes four." _

Rin sat by the red camellias trying to hold back her tears. She had passed Taiyomaru to Akari on her way out asking her to take him to his father. Trembling fingers feathered into the soil, while the tears finally started falling. "Forgive me little one, for being gone so long." She sat down cross legged wiping her eyes. "I haven't forgotten about you."

"Of course you wouldn't," Gobodo-sama strode on visible white legs and knelt down next to Rin. She set her hand on the younger woman's back. "She would have been a beautiful child."

"She?" Rin choked.

"Didn't he sense it?" Gobodo-sama rubbed her back. "I swear my son is more thickheaded than a bull. Yes it was a little girl. Her yoki is latent now but it's there."

"Mother," Sesshomaru snarled walking into the garden.

Hisato came behind him, then stopped when an angry claw flew at his face motioning him to stop. The younger dog demon held a hand to the blistered skin over his eye.

"What are you telling her?" He knelt down next to Rin.

"She is fine. You don't need to hover," Gobodo-sama slapped his hand away from her. "I was telling her about your daughter," she pointed at the red camellias marking the grave of the little one they had lost.

"It was too young to tell. Why are you doing this to her?" He had a craving to throw his mother into the hot springs while her guard was down.

"You are an idiot! Must I teach you everything," she grabbed his hand, laced her fingers through his and pressed it into the soil. "Feel. It's still there."

He closed his eyes, half curious at what his mother was getting at, until he felt the shallow latent yoki, "how can it be giving off my yoki still?"

"She always will. How do you think Nintojo was able to find your father's grave?" Her eyes rolled to the side, "passed that what do you feel?"

"Something feminine," his eyes widened as his mother released his own shivering hand. He coughed back emotions that he refused to show. "Leave us," he set both hands down in the flowers. "It was a girl."

Rin wrapped her arms around his flexed bicep and kissed his shoulder, "what would," she choked back a tear, "what would we have called her?"

Golden eyes trailed to the sakura tree. The limbs almost seemed to wrap around them, embracing the mourning couple. "Sakura," he rest the side of his head against Rin's forehead. "For the tree she was conceived under."

"Can we call her that? Even though," she stopped pressing her eyes into his shoulder.

"Yes," he lifted her chin, looking at her tear covered eyes.

"YOU WILL MIND YOUR TONGUE AROUND MY DAUGHTER!" Gobodo-sama thunderous voice blasted through the entire house.

"She called me her daughter," the lips that curved into a smile dripped with tears.

"You've grown on her," he held his lover close to him.

_"__Yes Gobodo-sama. It won't happen again," Atsuko sounded positively petrified. _

Rin's small laugh sputtered her tears away from her mouth. "Atsuko said we were lucky to have three. I felt like we were forgetting about…her." She felt the soil again. "I wish I could feel it."

He pulled Rin back into his lap, "I felt your distress." He kissed the side of her neck, "are you alright?"

"I'm fine," she muttered flicking tears from her face. "It's been a long and rather intense day. I'm tired."

"Do you want more children?" Even he wasn't sure where the question came from.

She shook her head. "No. It's different raising hanyous. Our lives are different. So different from what I imagined as a child. I thought if we were married," she covered his mouth just as it opened to protest the term. "I was eight years old when I first thought of marrying you. You can accept the term this once my love. I thought we would have child after child. There is so much at risk. So much to lose," she rested against him. "I'm happy with what we have."

"Rin, should you want another child with this Sesshomaru," he ran his thumb up and down her waist. "I would give you what you asked of me."

"I know," she wiped the final tears. "Dare I ask what all the mirrors are for?"

"You said it scares you not being able to see my face. We will make love, in a way where you can see this face," he pointed at himself.

"You're really going to make me aren't you?" Rin bolted upright to walk away from him.

"You know I don't like when fear holds you back," he pulled her back by the upper part of her arm. "You will see the face of the one you love," he turned her around. "If you feel fear, we will move slowly. We have all night."

"Yes but some of us need sleep!" She kissed his mouth despite the heavy weight she felt inside. "I have to care for your children in the morning."

"That is why we have so many servants to watch them. I will not leave until after breakfast," he returned the kiss. It became passionate quickly, with him holding her by the back of her hair. "You are not making returning easy," their lips met again.

"Then stay," her lips brushed against his as she spoke.

"I can't," he rest his forehead against hers breaking the kiss. "Trust me."

"I do," she smiled.

"No more tears," his thumbs ran over her moist cheeks.

"I wish I would see more of yours," she touched the corner of his eye.

"Sakura," he gazed at the flowers.

"Sakura," Rin kissed him one last time before releasing him. "I should go rescue Atsuko."

"It's one mistake she will not make again," they held hands as they walked back inside.

The evening turned to night. They ate dinner in the garden long before Atsuko's mindless comment had sent Rin into a small fit of mourning. There was something comforting about finally naming the child they had lost, knowing that it was a little girl. She chose not to tell the children. She wanted to wait until Sesshomaru was home for the three weeks or she felt like she would melt into a puddle of tears. Sesshomaru tucked the children into their bed, while Rin leaned against the doorframe holding Taiyomaru. He told them the story of Magatsuhi. A story that always captured their attention. Harutoga was drooling in his sleep by the time Sesshomaru's arm grew back, Yuki was wide awake for the whole story. As always by the end she always asked to see his left arm where it was impossible to tell that at one point he had lost it to Inuyasha. She rocked Taiyomaru, cradling him in her arms until his eyelids drooped and his mouth bubbled with sleep. The father tucked in his daughter then rose and stood next to Rin. "Give him to Akari for the night," he licked the side of her neck.

Rin tensed. "I'm not sure I agree with this plan of yours."

And that is how she ended up naked on his lap. Her back pressed against his. They had made love like this before. It wasn't this position that made her jumpy but she knew that is exactly where he was taking her. Her legs hung over his knees which were open exposing her to the mirror in front of them. His eyes were entirely too predatory. Her heart was racing. She felt on the edge of panic. One hand massaged her nipple the other ran up and down her stomach always stopping just before it dipped into her opening. It was different seeing him do this. This position wasn't new for them either, but seeing that hand ghost up and down and then stop. Each time it hit the skin above her hips, she tensed half in wanting and half in nerves. "So nervous," he purred in her ear. His mouth came down on her shoulder, warming her skin. "But so aroused." The tone was so intoxicating, so arousing. The next time his hand went down her hips rocked up, urging him to explore further down. "Do you want something?" He teased her.

Up to that point she had only glanced at their reflection.

"Are you scared to look?"

"It doesn't feel modest. You have me completely exposed," she insinuated at the wideness of her legs and how to allowed her to see the curves, bumps and openings of her sex.

"A beautiful opening," he said slyly. "Look in the mirrors."

She exhaled and finally allowed herself to take in their reflection. She really could see every cleft and crevice of her most private place like this and there was something so sensuous about those hands running up and down her body.

"Do you like what you see?" He asked running his hands down her stomach again.

She nodded a latent smile creasing her face. Her hips arched into his touch again.

"First," both hands went down onto her hips, then caressed down her thighs. She tensed and tried to bolt from his lap. "You're safe," he caught her around the waist. "Who holds you?"

She moved her long hair out of the way, seeing that she was in the lap of the one she loved, "you do."

"Who's hands touch you?" As he spoke the words, they ran from her buttocks, over the top of her hips and down her thighs again. She tensed at the movement, this time remaining against him. He repeated the motion, resting his hands on her inner thighs without moving them. "Who's hands touch you?"

She smiled at their reflection in the mirrors he had brought into their room. "Yours." She grinned feeling more confident.

The hands moved from her thighs, one back to her breast and the other resumed running up and down her waist. Oh but he was tormenting her. He was building her up, but kept stopping before he touched her where she wanted.

Rin's hands were practically useless in this position. For a moment she thought about touching herself to relieve the infernal fire he had lit down there. Fingers outstretched tingled down her stomach and stopped just at the start of her curls. "Your tormenting me." Something about actually seeing him hold her open, in his lap made it that much more erotic. She decided to chance his own reaction as her own hand came down and found her bud. She moaned lightly into his neck. _Is that what I look like? _

Entertainment played on his face as he adjust himself to hold her more securely. "Does it feel good."

She exhaled, near exasperation with him, "it feels better when you do you it."

"When I do this?" The hand finally fell pushing hers out of the way. The pads of the index and middle finger spiraled on her bud, pulling up when it reached the top to give it the slightest tug. It was only then she noticed how much moisture grew as he pressed against her. She never noticed before how after each circle his fingers went lower gathering dew from inside to massage on her. Her back arched into his fingers, her stomach burning, her breasts heaving.

"Sesshomaru," her muscles tightened within, feeling as if she needed something inside.

"Tell this Sesshomaru what you want?" His fingers moved so slowly it was torment, torture.

She tilted her head back to kiss his lips.

"Do you like what you see? The way my fingers touch you? The way they find the perfect spot." Just as he said the last word he pressed her bud firmly. "Do you see how wet they get when I do this," he pushed them inside of her, removing them cupped in her warmth, just to resume the painfully deliberate strokes against her bud. "Is it inside that needs attention." He spread her legs wider with his knees, then dipped his fingers inside. Even at that angle his thumb was able to gyrate against her clit.

Her breathing intensified against his neck. She couldn't believe what she was seeing. At first she felt too shy, too modest to watch his actions in the mirror. Then it was all too arousing to follow the motions of his fingers as they flexed against her. Their hair was a sea of silver and brown over one of her shoulders as she gripped the futon in with her hands to compensate. Her back arched. She sung his name. She moaned in ecstasy. That burning that started high in cervix washed down to his fingers, that started to drip. "It feels good," she rocked her hips into his fingers, then gripped one of his shoulders for balance. "Faster," the other hand gripped his wrist. She thought she looked like a wild animal on his lap, the way her eyes were wide, the way she thrust her hips into him attempting to finish faster

"Who gives you this pleasure?" His lips flicked against her neck as he spoke.

"You," she whispered. "Please," she gripped his wrist harder trying to take charge. "Faster?"

"Who holds you?" The thumb vibrated against her.

"You do," it came out a desperate plea as the fire burned a hole through her middle. His thumb moved so quickly she couldn't see it. She lost control of her senses rocking back and forth against the hand that touched her so intimately in front of the mirror. Her orgasm washed over her. She gripped his arm with both hands, desperate for something to ground her when the ripples of pleasure ripped through her body. "Oh kami, Sesshomaru," she held on for life. "It feels amazing."

He pulled her chin to his mouth to swallow her moaning.

"Is that really what I look like?" She leaned against his shoulder, legs still spread as he kept one finger pressed against clit to keep the pulsing going.

"Like you have been thoroughly ravished by a yokai?" Sesshomaru chuckled into her neck. "Beautiful."

"Wow," she kissed the inside of his neck.

"Laydown on your stomach," he closed his legs to give her more room to move.

She stiffened and refused to move. "Sesshomaru please…"

"Rin," he pushed her off his lap and knelt down by her knees. He wouldn't tell her how badly he needed his own release but if he had to he would stop. His hands rest on her knees, "lay down on your stomach."

"Why is this so important to you? You leave in the morning," she tried to avert her eyes from seeing his own arousal. Normally that would have had her jumping on him, but that isn't what he wanted.

He merely stroked her cheek with one of his damp fingers and kissed her mouth. Without words, and with affection as he kissed her, he leisurely helped her onto her stomach. He rose over her pressing one leg between hers, widening them.

"No. I'm not ready yet," her face turned away from the mirrors.

He held both her hands over her head and nuzzled the hair from her bare back with his nose. He licked and kissed her supple skin, taking extra care to trace the scars along her shoulders.

"Why is this so important?" She asked him again.

"Submission and trust," he let her feel his weight on top of her back, heating her skin. "Relax," he pushed himself against her opening.

She couldn't make herself relax, her mind was going back there.

"Rin," his hands still held hers, fingers laced. "Look in the mirrors," he nudged her chin with his nose, sniffing the dip of her neck.

She turned her head where he wanted and smiled, "your smiling."

He nodded. "Let me in," he gave another small push. "You're safe, my heart. He can't hurt us again." He pressed his body on top of hers but slightly to the side.

Rin smiled watching the demon in the mirror trace circles with his claws on her back. "You really love me don't you?"

He nodded. "What do you need from me?"

"Another position?"

"This position," he rubbed the palm of his hand over her shoulders, down the sides of her stomach and over buttocks. "You're safe Rin. You can see that it is me. What holds you back?"

"I don't want to go back there," she said. "To the forest, to being alone. Not knowing if he would rape me."

"How could you think I wouldn't save you? Our love is eternal," he set both knees between her legs and resumed rubbing her back. "I will always come for you. No matter the pain we cause each other. I love you."

"Slowly?" She gripped his fingers tighter.

She lifted herself up and spread her legs relaxing herself. Her orgasm was gone but the moisture remained. She tensed again feeling him enter.

"Rin," he hummed in her ear. "It's me."

"I know," her eyes watched in wonder as he entered her warm folds. She had never been able to watch him engage before.

He lifted her enough to bring his thumb back to her sensitive clit. He thrust within her, gently pulling and pushing. She clung to the sheets with one hand while the other held his. "Does it feel good?" He knelt over her back, caressing her skin.

"Yes," she gasped.

He groaned, low growls escaping his lips. For what felt like hours but was really only minutes, he made sweet, slow love to Rin, whispering his affection in her ears, praising her bravery and kissing her lips. He came to the edge of his own pleasure just as she cried out in a second release. They both collapsed on the futon. He held her tightly, pulling her to his chest. "Are you okay?"

"Yes," she said another round of tears coming.

"Don't cry," he allowed her to hide her face against him. "Was it that difficult?"

"No," she set her hand against his scar, "I just love you. A lot."

There it was the faith and trust him in him he had felt before, before Natsuki, before Touma had torn them apart. The same complete connection they had had when they conceived Taiyomaru. They would never be as they were before. Yet somehow they had regained much of what they lost.

**Please review! Ya'll know I love it!**

**Guest #1: An extreme fear of dogs would be stinking hilarious! We'll see what happens.**

**Guest #2: For yokai females giving birth needing the father present was my own invention. It's a total plot device, based off of needing the yoki of the male to calm and strengthen the female. Also Sesshomaru was only present for Harutoga and Taiyomaru's birth. Yuki's birth he was fighting his brother in the snow outside the cave and died. When he was brought back Yuki was already born. So technically nothing bad happened after that, except him having a minor mental breakdown. Nothing bad happened after Harutoga's birth. Lost Memories was five years later. Meaning from birth #1, nothing bad happened for eight years. And five years from birth number 2. Taiyomaru was a fluke. It had nothing to do with bad luck, Touma was stalking them and planning to screw them over. When the disease begins, it will be five years after Taiyomaru and Tsukimaru's births. **


	34. Katsumoto's Training

**Here I said I would write more requests and then this popped into my head. I wanted to show what the family is like through the eyes of the servant and drop several of easter eggs. Review if you can find them. There are a few very big ones in this for the disease.**

**I survived my first week of a creative writing class. I had to write an interesting poem, I'm going to load it into a pocket of original writing on Wattpad once it's graded if you want to follow me over there.**

**And I finally starte writing the Disease AKA The End. It's like three pages long. If you want to see what I wrote so far please let me know. It's literally going to take me a while to finish it. I have six days until my next class starts. **

Hisato banged on Katsumoto's doors. Sentinels had their own housing. Typically in a spare building half a mile from the main home for the ones that guarded the home. It was a quaint wooden hut with three bedrooms. Only two were occupied. Sato recently moved into one. Hisato had lived in another until Rin insisted he be given a room in the main hall out of respect for Sesshomaru's mother. He had given the younger only pure-blooded now sentinel half a day to get used to being behind the barrier. Hisato knew the weight of the oath that was taken on the black stone. It was enchanted with power from Miroku the Monk. One had to swear allegiance to Sesshomaru and that they would commit no harm to any that resided within the barrier. More than once he had wondered how the Healer had been able to cause the damage he did, despite his oath.

"What? Older more annoying cousin," Katsumoto leaned against the earth brown wooden doorframe wearing only grey hikama and nothing else. He tossed his thick black strands over his shoulder and turned around. "It's the middle of the night!"

"Perfect time to start learning your role here," Hisato let himself in. He kicked a pile of clothes aside.

"Role?" Katsumoto sat down on his mat on the ground. "It should involve a more comfortable futon. Does he make her sleep on something like this?"

"You aren't here for her," Sato ducked his head in from behind. "Idiot," he snorted. "You really thought you could steal Rin from him? Do you know nothing of bonding?"

Katsumoto waved it off, "please. Word has it that their bond has been broken twice by his overly large ego. What's a third time?"

Hisato slapped him in the back of head, "if you even think of trying to interfere the oath you took will kill you and if that doesn't her lover will."

"I swore to do no harm. How could harm come to Rin if I believe that she would be better off with one such as I? A handsome, young, liberal-"

"Stupid," Hisato added in.

"Moronic," Sato smiled.

"Unintelligent," Hisato patted his brother's shoulder.

"Ridiculous," Sato chuckled.

"I get the point. Is it true that you are bonded to Gobodo-sama?" Katsumoto asked excitedly.

Hisato turned furiously on Sato, "have you been blabbing again?"

"No, I believe she has," Sato backed away blocking a punch from his brother.

"What's it like?" Katsumoto held his hands over his heart. "Is she as beautiful beneath those clothing as she is with them on? Ugh-"

Hisato landed a punch against Katsumoto's cheek sending him flying through one of the far walls breaking it into pieces. He flew across the room, sandwiching the younger demon between the wooden floorboard and his knees. He held one fist up ready to lay another blow to Katsumoto's face, "if you ever talk about her like that again," he removed one of his katana's and pressed it into Katsumoto's neck drawing his blood, "you will lose more than your head."

"Fine, fine," Katsumoto attempted to get Hisato off him.

"And they chose you because you are supposed to be stronger than me?" Hisato ruffled the top of his head and rose off him. He slapped Katsumoto's cheek harder than necessary.

"If I wanted to beat you, I would," Katsumoto got off the floor shaking himself loose. He pulled his clothes on frustrated. "Very well then. Show me the ropes dear cousins."

"No," Sato walked out of the room. "That's Hisato's job. Not mine. I'm going to the village where my post is. Kiyoshi and Tadashi are already there."

"Now finish getting dressed and join me at the estate," Hisato left the room.

"Do I at least get a free meal?" Katsumoto yelled after them.

"How long do you give him?" Sato stopped at the entrance of the large hut. The night sky was full of stars. The moon shone glitteringly in the middle. There were few clouds floating in the great expanse. The field of daisies reached to the hut. They were surrounded by flowers and summer pollen flying in the wind.

"A week. If that…he's lucky it's the week Sesshomaru-sama is gone," Hisato said glumly.

"How do you think Yuki will take it?" Sato covered his mouth to hide his laughter. "Are you going to warn him about her?"

"Why would I do that?" Hisato grinned mischievously. "He can learn all about that child on his own."

"You really can't find her when she runs off?" Sato began the trek to the village. They would pass by the estate on the way, where he would deposit his brother.

"I can find her. I choose not to. She runs off to blow off steam and get her father's attention. It's not my fault her mother doesn't give her the space she needs or that her father has been gone so often since she was born," he sighed inwardly.

"You would know all about that wouldn't you?"

"Shut-up Sato," he shoved his brother. "There are ears everywhere."

Sato landed with a grunt on the ground. He rose like a kite, "see you around my brother." Sato shot up into the air. He stopped mid-flight black mokomoko floating in the wind. "Try not to kill him. Yasuko would not be happy."

"No, but I would," he slammed his fisted knuckles against the palm of his hand. "So happy…"

Katsumoto slumped over a bowl of bloodied meet in a glass bowl. He thanked the young servant girl whom he was unsure how much yoki flowed through her veins, by nodding her his head. She was a bit tall and gangly, with bulging blue eyes. Her hands were human like, but attached to long dangling arms. Her hair was black, and her face elongated like that of a horse. Katsumoto picked at the meat, detested with the taste and how it lacked the tenderness he was used to.

"Hurry up," Hisato kicked the younger demon's feet out from underneath him.

"Isn't there something better to eat? A nice ogre heart? Liver of a bear? This is so scant," he flicked the intestines inside with his claws blanching.

"It's sika and you'll learn to deal with it. We send hunting parties into the forests every week. Has your mother pampered you so? What will she do when she finds out where you are?" Hisato sat down with a large cup of sake in his hand.

"You drink while working?"

"This is human sake. It doesn't have quite the same effect. Atsuko makes this. That was her daughter. A hanyou. Her name is Fumiko," he motioned at the child serving the scant amount of visitors in the public dining hall. "Everyone works together here. There is no currency. So don't think you'll make yourself rich. Come on, follow me." Hisato led him to the door that opened down a long corridor. "This leads to the family area. No one, except for the family, you, myself, Atsuko, Akari and Jaken are allowed beyond that door. That is part of your job. Tadashi guards the door during dinners to keep intruders from coming through. Unless Rin-sama tells him not to because she wants to play a game of cat and mouse with the demons Sesshomaru-sama is meeting with. If you happen to find her in an altercation with one of them, do not interfere. She is quite capable and will retaliate against you," he walked passed an open door. "That is Sesshomaru-sama's study. Do not go in there," he walked passed another door, "this is the family dining-room. Do not go in there. He made it further down the hall to the back of the house. "This is the family bathhouse. Do not go in there. Across the hall is the Lord and Lady's private bed chamber."

"Don't go in there?" Katsumoto added.

"You're catching on. Next to their room is Yuki's room. Harutoga has his own room. He doesn't use it. He sleeps with Yuki and puts his clothes in her trunks. That room is largely empty and used for storage. Don't go in there. This is the back entrance," he openeda blue door at the end of the hall. "Down this hallway is my room and Jaken's room."

"Why do you get a room in the house?"

"Seniority," Hisato quipped.

"Or because your bedding the master's mother?" Katsumoto trailed quickly after Hisato then stopped short when he ran face first into Sesshomaru's armor. "Which isn't a bad thing." He backed against the wall gulping. He attempted avoiding the piercing gaze of Sesshomaru's golden eyes. "I've heard she's um…quite pleasant."

Sesshomaru closed the door to his room, glared at Hisato then stalked down the hall. Inside were the soft sounds of snores from the children's rooms. Akari sat outside the red door holding Taiyomaru in her hands singing him a lullaby.

"This is Akari. She is the night maid. She stays until the morning, then returns mid-afternoon. Atsuko is a human. She will come after the sun-rises. Her daughter doesn't sleep, which is why she serves in the kitchen. Come," he was about to lead Katsumoto out of the room when a high pitched wail came from the Lord and Lady's bedchamber.

Katsumoto was steps in front of Hisato when Hisato called, "leave it!"

Akari knowing what the newest member of their household was about to do stepped in front of the door. One hand flamed orange. "It's just a nightmare. Leave her be. If it's bad enough he'll come." Akari waved the two of them off.

"Shouldn't someone comfort her?" Katsumoto practically sung as he spoke.

"Not you," Hisato grabbed him by the elbow. "Come on."

"Kami," Rin came out of the room with her hand over her heart. "That's three this week."

"That's better than every night two weeks ago," Akari stood up cradling the sleeping baby. "Shall we have some tea?"

"Please," Rin waved at the two guards then left up the hall with Akari.

"Is that their baby?" Katsumoto wondered.

"Taiyomaru. He is six months old," he led him out the door.

"He doesn't look like a hanyou," Katsumoto said entertained.

"He is," Hisato paused. "An interesting child. His blood is nearly pure, yet his humanity remains. He looks more like you and I. With dark hair, but pointed ears," he smiled thinking back on that birth. "He will be a powerful force when he is older. The perimeter of the house," Hisato flew high into the air until he hovered over the entirety of the house, "includes the private garden. None are allowed in there without permission. Not even the children. It is the Lord and Lady's private domain. At times they invite the children, or the servants. When Rin is with the children, you will patrol the house. When she is not, you will guard Yuki and Harutoga. Taiyomaru still nurses-"

"Will I get to see her nurse?"

"You really want to die a premature death don't you?"

"Does she have beautiful breasts?"

"He has very good hearing," Hisato warned him. "And you haven't even bedded a woman. What would you know?"

The younger dog-demon folded his arms and stroked his chin. "I will one day."

"If you so much as look at her, he will kill you," Hisato warned him firmly. "And if he doesn't, I'm sure your mother will."

"You promised not to tell her!" Katsumoto flew after Hisato.

They landed by the back entrance to the home. "And you promised not to be an idiot. Only of one us is keeping our promises. When the children wake you will meet them. They are almost always together. They are allowed to go to the village on their own. At times they take Aun, at times they don't. They are not allowed to leave the barrier without one of their parents. Although Yuki at times leaves it anyway."

"Am I to discipline her?"

Hisato froze for a moment thinking about that. "Yes," he choked back his laughter knowing exactly what Yuki would do with such reproofs. "You may."

Katsumoto continued down the hall.

"What are you telling him?" Rin poked her head out from the her room grabbing Hisato by the arm. "You know what she is going to do to him."

"Yes I do," Hisato covered his mouth laughing.

"You are evil," she punched his shoulder.

"It's a good way to break him in. He still has a crush on you," Hisato nudged her. "Go to sleep. Shall I get him?"

"Is he in a meeting? Sesshomaru may have to kill him, if I didn't think he was so cute."

"I'll check," Hisato shut the door and strode down the hall.

"Is that all cousin?" Katsumoto asked. "What does one do at night? Sleep? Have a break?"

"No. One patrols around the house and through the corridors. One learns the scent of those that belong here and those that don't. And one should go do that…right now," he waved Katsumoto off with a glare.

"You don't have to be so rude," Katsumoto complained as he walked off to the back entrance.

He found it rather boring to fly around the house, at the speed at which he was able to fly he circled it at least three hundred times before the sun came up. The first ten times he did so leisurely to learn the twists and curves of the tall edifice. The roof was slanted and made of the same white stone that the rest of the house was. He assumed the slanting was to keep intruders from being able to find a place to sit on the roof. Even he would have a hard time finding a place to sit. The private garden fascinated him. There was a small covered area with an intricately designed awning again made from the same white marble. Past that was grass just before the lone sakura tree that marked the beginning of the forest. Around the small hot springs that was girded with stone were bright covered daisies. Except for the one patch that sat just near the stones that was red. He found the red flowers odd. Beyond that was the forest that riddled with high branches and nettles. Every so often he ran into one of the other sentinels. They brushed him off, except for Sato who flew a few circles with him before landing.

As the sun rose and he made his way through the home for the twentieth time memorizing the small careening passages. He found a bleary eyed white haired, cat-eared little girl in the hallway rubbing her eyes. She wore a short kimono that barely covered her backside and strange white things on her legs that looked like straight hikama cut off at the middle of her thighs. She stood just outside the turquoise door he was told was the children's room. "You must be Yuki." He towered over her.

"Who the hell are you?" Yuki bare her teeth at him.

"Katsumoto," he said curtly. "I am your new guard."

"Kami we must be getting desperate," she pushed past him nearly elbowing him in the hip.

He grabbed her by the upper arm. "Did you never learn proper respect when you greet someone older than you?"

Hisato stood guard next to the red door covering his mouth. He knew what was coming.

"Dog," Yuki dug her nails Katsumoto's wrist. Green mist flew from their white tips.

"Dammit," he hissed ripping his hand away. The skin blistered red.

"Did I forget to mention she inherited that trait from her father?" Hisato let out a belly laugh from his place next to the door.

Yuki broke out in giggles then bolted for the backdoor.

"Yuki where are you going?" Harutoga called after his sister.

Katsumoto flew out the door after her.

Rin came out of the room just as bleary eyed with Sesshomaru behind her holding her hand. "What's going on?"

"Katsumoto met Yuki," Hisato replied wiping tears of joy from his eyes.

"She blasted his hand with dokkasu," Akari passed Rin Taiyomaru.

"He's chasing her, can I go watch?" Harutoga asked jumping up and down.

"Chichiue is leaving this morning," Rin took Harutoga's hand. "Do you want to eat breakfast with Chichiue or watch your sister get chased by your new guard?"

"Awww you just got back Chichiue!" Harutoga tried to hide his disappointment in a stone-like face. It didn't stop the lone tear that fell from his eyes.

Sesshomaru picked his son up and walked down the hall away nuzzling his nose, "I will be back in a week. Then I will be home for three weeks."

"Three weeks? Really?" Harutoga's arms flew around Sesshomaru's neck.

"Chichiue is going to be home more now," Rin trailed after them.

"Three weeks, that will be a record. Besides when the Healer took Rin's memories," Akari watched the family as they made their way to the dining room. "I'm going home."

"It'll be good for them," Hisato kept his distance and then took his post outside the dining room.

Katsumoto caught Yuki just outside the house. She grabbed his wrists again, this time he was faster than she was and caught her tiny boney arms in a cross and turned them inward so they sprayed her own stomach. "Ow you ass!" She kicked at his stomach.

He bent his stomach back avoiding the blow. "Very nice use of your toe-claws little one," he complimented her.

"Nice use of a waste of air stupid!" She jumped twisting her body freeing her arms, landing on the forest floor. They stood in the thicket of green pisceas with a few Camaphors with bending boughs. She crossed her arms, narrowing her eyes at the black haired dog-demon. "You're the new one aren't you?"

"Are you always this sassy?"

"Are you always this much of an idiot?" She circled him like he was a rabbit evading a fox. "What's so special about you? I killed the last one you know."

"It won't be so easy with me," Katsumoto replied coolly moving out of her circle of predation. "Use your nose little one. What do you smell?" He held out his hand to her palm up.

Yuki tiptoed up to it cautiously. She sniffed his fingers just by the claws, "you don't have dokkasu."

He knelt down, his knees crunching on the dead leaves and pine nettles. "Is that all?"

Little fingers grasped his hand pulling his palm closer. She sniffed the off-white colored skin, "you're pure blooded."

Katsumoto inclined his head. "I'm also much faster than you. And don't think masking your yoki will escape me the way it does my cousin."

"Hisato is your cousin? He's an idiot too," she elbowed him out of her way hiking into the forest.

"Your father is leaving soon!" He called after her.

She stopped kicking at the dirt. "He just got back!"

"He is going to inspect his borders," Katsumoto held out his hand to Yuki.

"Eww," she spat at it and continued on her own back to the house. "Stupid Chichiue always leaving."

An hour later, after the family had finished their morning meal, Katsumoto and Hisato leaned against the walls of the hall as Sesshomaru made his way to the public entrance of the home. Rin's steps were heavy as she plodded behind him and the children. He held Taiyomaru in one hand, while Yuki held the other. "You just got back," Yuki said wiping a tear from her eyes. As brave as the little one tried to be, she wasn't looking forward to her father being gone again.

"I will be home for three weeks afterwards," he made no move to turn behind him.

"Liar," Yuki attempted to pull out of his hand.

His grip came down on hers, he knelt down, his golden eyes searing a hole into hers.

"I'm sorry," she muttered, trying to get out of his grip.

"You are not sorry," he forced her chin up, "and you will not speak to Chichiue like that again."

"Fine," she ripped her hand out of his.

Sesshomaru was finally turned enough to see Rin's downcast face. Her chin was the next he picked up. "Do you want to use the private entrance?" He asked her.

Katsumoto observed curiously. Outwardly Rin seemed as if she was fine. Her scent did not match the fake smile that was plastered on her face. The only word he could use when Sesshomaru offered herthe back entrance was relief and then tears. He felt the need to hug her until he felt claws digging into his wrist. Hisato held his arm like a vice and shook his head.

"Alone," Rin whispered through her tears. "I'm sorry," she tried to wipe them away.

Sesshomaru waved it off. He pulled Harutoga into an embrace and kissed his son's cheek. "One week," he tapped the child's nose. "Be good for Ka-san."

Yuki stood facing the ivory walls. Her arms folded across her chest gave away the foul mood she was in. "I don't want you to go!" She leapt over her brother and into her father's free arm, wrapping her hands around his neck.

"One week," Sesshomaru repeated. "You will behave for your Ka-san or there will be consequences."

"Do I have to behave for dog face?" She pointed at Katsumoto.

_Dog-face?_ Katsumoto was about to open his mouth, when those claws dug into his wrist again signaling him to be quiet.

Sesshomaru's cheeks twitched.

"Children it's time for your lessons, come with me," Jaken came into the hallway. He grasped Yuki and Harutoga by the hands and led them to their father's study.

"Bye Chichiue," Harutoga sniveled.

"Bye," Yuki mouthed through more tears than were appropriate for a nine-year old.

Atsuko squeezed between the rather tightly packed space and held her arms out for Taiyomaru. Sesshomaru nuzzled his young son. No longer the youngest. He kissed his crescent moon then handed him to the maid. He pivoted on his heel taking Rin by the hand leading her to the back entrance. "Follow me," Hisato said quietly.

"Why? I thought I am to watch the children?" Katsumoto exited the estate just behind the other three.

"To learn about discretion and to see why you should drop your obsession with her," Hisato stood guard behind one of the pine trees that framed the door of the back entrance. He gave Katsumoto a push behind the other.

Rin and Sesshomaru sat together on a large boulder that was meters from the home. She choked back tears, "nine years and I still can't get used to this."

"I have never enjoyed leaving you," he held her hand, running his thumb along the lines of her palms. "The barrier is up. We have a new sentinel. You will be safe until my return."

She swallowed her sorrow and said in quiet firmness, "I'm going with the hunting party this time."

His eyes hardened, "do not take Taiyomaru."

"I'll leave him with Atsuko or Akari," she stretched her arms over her head.

"Take Hisato," he tilted his head behind him at her guard. "I need to leave."

Katsumoto was forced to avert his eyes. Somewhere between those words and their lips meeting, suddenly Sesshomaru was behind his lover lifting up the back of her kimono, then there was moaning and his cheeks were burning. "Are they?"

"Yep," Hisato grappled to get Katsumoto's shoulder, "turn around."

"It's broad daylight," he protested.

"There's no one back here," Hisato laughed at the innocence of the younger demon.

"Oh…oh…oh," Rin moaned.

"She's so loud," Katsumoto complained.

"Shut-up," Hisato directed him.

"Ouch," a green whip came flying at Katsumoto's face landing against his cheek, tearing into his skin enough to draw blood. "How can he aim so well while doing that."

"Shh," Hisato held a finger to his lip.

Sesshomaru had Rin turned backwards over the boulder. He surprised himself at the sudden urge to take her. Sometimes his yokai tendencies overwhelmed him. It was as if he was telling Katsumoto exactly who she belonged to, but also comforting the deep well of pain she was feeling at their impending separation. He held her hips firmly apart, and ignored the small whine of pain that first came from her lips. He whispered in her ear, "am I hurting you?"

"No," her hands gripped the stone. There were no claws for her to draw lines in from the sensations he knew he was forcing through her body.

As he beat against her, enjoying her heat he sensuously mumbled in her ear, "we will do this when I return. No more meetings before, no more appointments. Open your legs more." He didn't give her time to comply before he drove himself deeper inside of her. There were times, he could not control himself. His claws dug into her kimono ripping holes in the sides just missing her flesh. This was one of them. He pushed one hand against her back, "arch," he grabbed her stomach not allowing her to move.

She grabbed his free hand right when he knew she was where he wanted her at the point between pleasure and pain. She screamed in release just as he came within her. Her tears stopped as he flooded her with comfort from their bond.

"Have you been holding that in?" She questioned panting.

He licked he lobe of her ear and nibbled on her neck, "a little. Did I hurt you?"

"A little. We had an audience," Rin tried to right her clothes.

"Did we?" Sesshomaru pulled the front of his hikama back up awkwardly tucking it under his armor before tying it. "Maybe he learned something."

"That I belong to you?" She sat on top of the rock, with a smile.

He shrugged his shoulders with a sly smirk on his face.

"Be safe my love," she pulled him in for another kiss. "Come home to me."

He held her gaze. "I will visit Tsukimaru on the third day."

"Okay," she said quietly.

"I will return at sunset on the seventh day," he gave her one last kiss to keep her for the week he would be gone. And then he was gone.

Katsumoto resumed watching feeling the absence of yoki like a vortex he turned to find Rin sitting on the large stone crying. "She's sad."

"She will be fine in a few hours. This is usually the case after he leaves," Hisato opened the door and bellowed down the corridor, "Jaken!"

The green imp came flying out of the room with Nintojo looking for a fight. Hisato motioned to Rin with his head. "Go to her. Katsumoto, return to your post."

"Why him?" Katsumoto stopped staring at the strange green imp.

"He helped raise her. Go back to the children," Hisato repeated himself.

Katsumoto left just as Jaken climbed onto the rock next to Rin.

"He'll return," Jaken said faithfully.

"I know," she wiped her tears again.

"It's just the first time he's left since…"

"Touma," Jaken finished the sentence for her.

"Yeah," the words leave her mouth sadly.

"Are you still upset with him?"

"Not really. Her yes. Even though we found some kind of peace between us," Rin said honestly. "Do you think he will love her one day?"

"I can't answer that," Jaken said sheepishly. "I've known him for a century and the most emotion I have ever seen him show was with you. You are his heart, the reason he feels. Do you want him to love her?"

"Not now," although she had a feeling even in the future he didn't. _What are you like my love? _"Oh great," Rin sighed hearing the screams she knew were coming.

Katsumoto came running back through the halls holding a squawking and screaming Taiyomaru. He held the child as if he carried a disease of some kind, one hand on the child's back the other supporting his neck as he flopped in the demon's arms. He threw him at Rin then bowed backing away. "There is something wrong with this baby." He thumbed the inside of his ears to drown out the sound.

"No, he just misses his father," Rin caught her son and immediately began nursing him. "I can do this. One week of screaming right Jaken?"

Jaken slid off the rock, "I'll resume Yuki and Harutoga's studies."

"I'll just sit here," Rin sighed staring at the sky. _Be safe my love. _She was suddenly aware of golden eyes watching her half exposed breast. She picked up a rock and threw it at Katsumoto who easily dodged. "Back to your post. Now."

"Technically I am at my post. I am charged with guarding the children," he cocked an eye-brow at Rin. Her breast did seem quite beautiful, although slightly soggier than he thought it should.

"Except for when I am guarding she and Taiyomaru. Back in the house, or go flying Katsumoto," Hisato gave Katsumoto a shove back through the grainy doorcase.

"Thank you Hisato," Rin scooted around in a circle until her back was facing Hisato. "He wants to die doesn't he?"

"It would seem that way."

"Terrible waste though," Rin wiped the final tear off her cheek laughing, "we just got him."

By evening, once the hell child and her brother were tucked in Katsumoto found a place for himself on top of the slanting roof of the home. He sat with one knee upright the other down, his eyes running circles along the perimeter of the home. It seemed a waste of his time to spend so much time flying around when the barrier kept out anyone threatening and beyond that the sentinels in the village would dispatch of any threats before they ever came his way. His mind was ill at ease as he sat in the darkness. Yuki was a powerhouse of a nine-year old Hanyou. His wrist still stung and by bedtime she hadn't made it much easier. He was tasked with tying her flailing naked body up with his whip while the half-demon fire cat servant washed the little girl that had no intention of allowing herself to be cleaned. After that she had attempted bolting out the garden door and into the forest. She made it as far as the outside door before Katsumoto stood in her way like a mythical statue knocking her over. She was essentially dragged back to her bed an tucked in by her mother who warned her against getting out. From his view, he would be able to tell if the little one decided to abandon her mother's warning.

He rest his chin on his knee. He was only in the middle of his third century. He wasn't quite at the age to take a mate, but there were questions he had and things he wondered. The most obvious was how would he know? Rin was beautiful enough but he would face the dangerous end of Sesshomaru's claws if he dared make a move on her. It wasn't that that concerned him. He was obviously faster than the Dog Lord, so escape would be easy, but more the simple questions of love.

"What are you doing up here?" Hisato joined Katsumoto on the pointed tip of the roof.

"Pondering," Katsumoto said quite seriously. "Do you love Gobodo-sama?"

"I'm not your father Katsumoto," Hisato unwrapped his mokomoko from his shoulders letting it flip in the wind. "Surely you've spoken to him and your mother about these questions."

"Father is sick. Mother is worried he won't make it through the next cold season," Katsumoto's voice fell. "They've been together for five centuries. Yet I do not see them treat each other with the same tenderness and passion that I observed today."

"There is much you may not see when the depths of the heart are only revealed in private," the elder of the two surmised. "How is your father sick?"

"I don't know. He left the Western Lands in service of Kensaku-sama three months ago and came back with a strange a fever and blisters covering his legs. We thought it was poison. The Healers have not been able to name it. He said he was not attacked by another demon. He had a rather unpleasant run-in with some Monks but other than that…He has been laid up in bed ever since."

"Odd," Hisato admitted nervously.

"When I last spoke to Haha-ue she said the blisters were finally receding but when they were near his stomach he could not keep food down. She wasn't able to use their bond to heal him or strengthen his yoki," a blast of lightening hit the sky. Katsumoto smiled holding his palm out as the rains began to fall. "You know I can dance between the rain drops? If I don't' want them to touch me, they won't."

"You are known for your speed," Hisato bundled his mokomoko over his head.

"Did you always love her?"

"Love," Hisato let the word float over his tongue. He had tried in the past admitting his feelings to her. She was resistant to accept the word, rejecting of it, even though she knew it caused him pain. _Human sentiments_ she often said with a hint of something in her voice and a feeling she couldn't hide from him. She was afraid to love again. "My feelings for her were strong, long before she came to me."

"How did you know?"

"If you keep up that line of thought you may not survive the week here," Hisato warned him.

He brushed it off waving his hand in the air, "oh I'm not talking about Rin. She is a beauty, but this vortex of power, lust, attraction, I don't feel it with her. Did you feel it with Gobodo-sama?"

"I'm not the best to answer. My human blood allowed me resistance. When you run across the right one, human or not, you'll know."

"Is it really irresistible for one such as I?"

"You won't be able to say no," Hisato rose from the roof. "Go to the dining hall and eat something. I'll cover your post until you return."

"You won't say more?"

"I'm not pure-blooded Katsumoto. What I felt for her is different than what you would feel. There is one you could speak to here, although I would measure your words wisely."

"I'll not interfere. Odd that one so fierce could love so deeply," he flicked a drop of rain from his shoulder.

"You are young yet. One day you will know what it feels like," the elder demon flew away leaving Katsumoto alone on the roof.

"Love," he said to himself.

**I love writing Yuki...who loves her reaction to Katsumoto and how she backtalks her father?**

**Please Review! I love them :)**

**Estherale247: **Your reviews always crack me up. I love them. I am a total feminist too, but if there are two things I try to reflect here is that number 1, it's Feudal Japan, Polygamy was normal and 2, they chose together to heal. Actually if she had done what she did to a human husband back then he could kill her if he wanted. Sadly it doesn't go both directions. But I do want to make one distinction, he has nothing to do with Natsuki until after Rin is dead out of respect for her wishes which is also more than a human husband would do. And yes the question is 100% male and I love it. He had the right to ask. She basically assaulted him, stole his children and dropped off the map for a few months until his half starved, emaciated daughter found him...so there are no innocents. It's going to be written into the Disease, why he doesn't like human terms. So don't worry she doesn't care about that because she understands he uses different terms. Sorry people it can't all be about Rin getting what she wants. Sesshomaru has to make concessions too. And he makes a lot of them for her. Just no one sees it, they are too mad at him LOL.

**Guest #1: **Inuyasha does not survive the disease. He is the first one to die from it. If anyone picked up on Easter egg in this one-shot is that Katsumoto's father ran into some monks but survives. Inuyasha is the first to die, but not to spread it. So far anyway...poor Kagome this is just going to suck.

**Guest #2: ** I think many reviewers agree with you! Notice though she is not forced to be complacent, she chooses to stay with him solely based on him having nothing to do with natsuki and I do make him pushy, but he is pushy in the series so it doesn't bother me. I love seeing 21st century feminism clash with 15th century reality :). Trust me he loves her fiercely and he doesn't collect females. AHHHHH I know how I wanted the Disease to end.


	35. A Day in the Life of Harutoga

**Thank you all for reviewing and reading! Finally something new. Sorry my muse was dying while working on the Disease. It's up ya'll :).**

**This was an email request by the lovely Esther247. She has a podcast called, Body of an Extrovert. She is also the author of a Battle Yet Seen. So worth the read. **

**A Day in the Life of Harutoga**

**Morning**

He woke up to the feeling of something poking into his stomach and the sound of his name by a voice he didn't often hear in his room, "get up you lazy child," the poke came again.

"Stop it Jaken!" Harutoga flicked his wrist, sending a green whip from his hand and threw Nintojo against the white covered wall of his room. He covered his eyes trying to block out the early morning sun and rolled back over, bringing his blanket with him over his eyes.

"Get up Haru," Yuki jabbed him in the side with her index finger. "Chichiue is leaving soon."

"Awww…" the boy whined as he pulled himself out of bed and went over to his chest that contained his hikama and haori's. In the summer he liked to wear the shorter ones that came down to his thighs, with shorts. Obasan gave him shorts to wear in the summer. She brought them from her time and he liked them better than the short hikama that the maids made for him. He pulled out a pair of black shorts and bright green haori. He liked this one the best because Chichiue had one that was similar.

"Hurry up!" Yuki nudged him.

"Leave me alone Yuki," he stuck his tongue out at his older sister. She was always bossing him around. He finished dressing then followed Jaken and Yuki down the hall with their new guard behind them.

"Look it's a stupid muttface," Yuki taunted Katsumoto.

The guards face contorted in frustration.

"Just leave it Katsumoto," Hisato waved him off as they reached the dining room. They had two in their house. One was gigantic and filled with tables. When they had important guests come the tables were put together in one long row that reached down the entire hall. Harutoga liked the private one the best. The table was made of granite and sometimes he got to sit next to Chichiue but mostly Yuki did because she was the oldest.

He ran up to his mother first and hugged her. She was feeding baby Taiyomaru. He leaned over her lap and tickled the baby's chin. It made milk spill over the baby's cheek when he smiled and his fangs clamped down. "Ouch," Ka-san removed his hand, "not while he's eating." She pushed his hand off.

Next Harutoga ran up to his father. He jumped into his lap and stuck his tongue out at Yuki. _This time I get to be closest. _It was never easy on him when his father left, "you're leaving?" He tugged on the side of Sesshomaru's hair.

"For a week," his father said as the food was brought in.

Atsuko served them most mornings. She brought in a tray of his favorite foods. There was raw meat in a bowl for Chichiue, fresh apples from the orchard, eggs and other delicacies. Chichiue always loved eating breakfast with them before he left on his trips. "What is left to prepare for the wedding?" Sesshomaru asked Rin.

Their cousin was marrying a pure-blooded wolf demon. Sota met Sayako while they travelled the summer before Taiyomaru was born. "We need flowers. I think we need Shippo to come. Our gardens aren't growing fast enough and I don't have the heart to raid the field behind our home. I think we have to build a pyre in front of the house, they get married in front of a large fire and then there is the meal afterwards. I'm still waiting on the shipment of Sake from the East and the hunters need to go out and bring back meat. Maybe we should bring in farm animals."

"Disgusting," Chichiue said quickly, "you know that."

"Perhaps for you," she laughed at him. "For humans it's very pleasing."

"Can I have some?" Harutoga reached out to his father's plate and pinched some of the raw meat. "Please?"

"Go ahead," his father told him. "We train before I leave."

"Can I be 'it' first?" He asked excitedly.

"I want to be first," Yuki picked up some of the raw meat.

Chichiue caught her hand, "you did not ask."

"Why do I have to ask?" She glared at her father.

His grip tightened on her wrist.

Her eyes rolled, "may I please have some?"

"Ask again without the eyes," Sesshomaru rebuked her.

Harutoga watched entertained as Yuki screwed on a more serious face and a fake grin and said, "may I please have some meat?"

Ka-san snorted trying not to laugh as she ate her fruit and rice.

"Yes you may," Chichiue let go of her arm. "Harutoga may go first."

"Yes!" He bounced on his father's lap. "I win," he said to Yuki.

"Was it a competition?" Rin asked them finally removing Taiyomaru from her breast. The little baby giggled and grabbed her mother's hair.

"No, but I wanted to be first and I won," Harutoga turned around and hugged his father.

**Mid-morning**

He creeped through the bushes in the forest. They were nearing the grove. No matter how many times they played this game, the grove made his skin crawl. Flashes of memories he wanted to forget shot through his mind. His mother on the floor bleeding, Yuki being thrown and then trying to run only to be picked up by the scruff of his neck and smacked in the head. His skin broke out in a sweat and his fingers started shaking. He took a tentative sniff of the air and started backing away. He could smell Yuki nearby but he couldn't find his father's scent. He didn't like the grove, that was where everything started changing. He turned to run out of the pisceas and back to the garden when he felt a hand on his shoulder, "why are you running?"

"Ahhh!" He screamed falling onto the forest floor. His back connected with an upturned stone. He rolled over trying to push the pain back.

"Harutoga?" His father loomed over him. "There was no danger. Stand up."

He pushed himself off the ground trying to catch his breath, "I don't like it in there." He dusted the back of his shorts off.

"You're scared?" Sesshomaru questioned his son.

"The shadowman was there," Harutoga tried to back away.

"No fear," his father told him and takes his hand.

"I don't want to go!" Harutoga yelled at him trying to get out of his grasp.

"No fear," he said each word one by one. "You will follow me into the grove."

Yuki jumped out of a nearing tree, "scaredy cat," she teased her brother.

"Katsumoto," Sesshomaru called to the trees. The younger demon came out of the bushes. His feet crunch the pine nettles on the ground. "Take Yuki and continue the game."

"I'm not playing with him!" Yuki fumed at Katsumoto.

Harutoga clutched his father's palm as if his life depended on it. Even the wind reminded him of what happened that day.

"Katsumoto," Sesshomaru said again, he didn't need to say more. If they work for Chichiue, they knew better than to make him say anything more than once. "Harutoga, come with me." He lifted his son off the forest floor and turned his back on Yuki and Katsumoto and walked into the grove.

Harutoga held tighter onto his shoulders, "I don't want to go in there!" He struggled to get out of his father's arms but it was impossible. His father's arms were like oak trunks wrapping around him.

When they arrived in the grove he set Harutoga down. He held onto the child's hand. "What do you smell?"

Harutoga lifted his little nose up in the air. He sniffed the air, "the forest?"

"What else?"

He sniffed again. There was a musky smell that hinted of nuts, "chipmunks and squirrels?"

"What else?"

He smelled again and sneezed covering his nose, "that funny scent that makes me sneeze is birds," he covered his mouth laughing. "And I think a badger made his home in there."

"Find the badger," he let go of his son's arm.

Harutoga sniffed the air again. Badgers smell like hay and fresh meat and summertime. They're also mean as snakes and attack without warning. He tread carefully through the nettles, slinking over the large rock where Yuki's toe claws still marred the surface, past the area where he saw his mother thrown to the ground. He slipped over a log then pointed to a hole in the ground.

"Good," his father motioned him back and they sat on the log together.

Harutoga curled into his father's side and was quiet.

Sesshomaru rest an arm around his son's shoulders, "there is nothing to fear here. The shadowman is gone."

"I haven't been here since we came home," the little boy said quietly. "Chichiue? How do you know when something is dangerous?"

"Instinct," Sesshomaru answered quickly. "That dark feeling in the pit of your stomach."

"I had it just now," he rubbed his belly and felt a tingle in his throat. The grove was as it always was. The morning sun shone through the trees casting shadows on the ground. The nettles were soft and blue, but would become hard and brown when the weather changed. There were magnolias that were a soft gold in color and smelled like maple syrup.

"That was anxiety, not instinct," his father corrected him. "You'll learn the feeling as you get older."

"Can instinct be wrong?" Harutoga wondered. "Everyone said that when you and Ka-san were fighting. Was it wrong what you did with Natsuki?"

Then his father exhaled heavily shaking his head, "no. The timing was wrong," he said quietly.

"But you made a baby with her and hurt Ka-san," he insisted. "How can it not be wrong if it made someone else feel bad?"

"Fate knows the ones we are meant to be connected to. Natsuki was not meant to approach Chichiue for many more years."

"Do you love her?"

"No."

"But you made a baby with her?"

"The act of making a child does not always connote love," lines creased around his father's face.

"But you bonded her like Ka-san? Doesn't that mean you love her?" There were so many thing he heard in the last few months he wasn't sure what they were. He knew how babies were made now and had heard about the bonds his kind made with the people they loved, but he was only six.

"Instinct does not need love," his father stood. A hand came flying backwards at Harutoga's face. The child threw his own hand up, blocking the blow. A smirk crossed his father's face, "how did you know that was coming?"

"My ears tickled," he pinched the top of his black ear still holding his father's hand. "But sometimes the pit in my stomach hurts too much and I-" he squeaked blocking another blow from his father. He ducked under his father's hand.

"Faster!" Sesshomaru shouted at him, sending his whip around his son's legs.

Harutoga struggled to free his ankles as the whip tightens. He flicks his wrist and sends a whip around his father's ankles. Sesshomaru jumped out of his son's grasp and pulled the child up by his feet dangling him upside down. He tapped his nose playfully, "ignore the pit in your stomach. I have to leave soon. It's time to go home." He tickled Harutoga's tummy.

The boy laughed then grabbed his father's face, "I love you Chichiue."

**Parting-**

Parting was never fun for anyone. It always made his stomach hurt. He stayed behind as the family walked down the hallway. Before they opened the door to the public dining room Chichiue bent over and whispered into Rin's ears, "are you okay with the public entrance this time?"

"Yes," she held his hands.

It made Harutoga blush seeing them hold hands because it didn't take long for their lips to connect and Chichiue made Ka-san fall against the side of the wall and she nearly lost her balance. "Are you happy to see this Sesshomaru go?"

"No," Ka-san answered, "but it doesn't hurt as much this time. I know you'll return."

"The wedding is two days after I return. I will see Tsukimaru before that, then come here. You will have guests to house before that time. Do not let them trample on you," he said firmly.

Harutoga knew what that meant. Without Chichiue there, Ka-san would have to show how strong she was on her own. It was because she was human and many of the guests wouldn't be.

Yuki went to hug him first. She always cried when he left then it was Harutoga's turn. He ran and jumped into his father's arms and nuzzled his nose, "come back soon." He hugged him and then waved as he left.

**Afternoon**

Lunch was always quiet in their home. Ka-san had it served in the family dining room but the children come and go as they please. After Chichiue left they were forced to spend several hours with Jaken learning. Harutoga was learning to read. He sat with a scroll in the corner of their father's study, hacking his way through the words. Katsumoto observed from over his shoulder helping him when he stumbled through them. He was the first to finish then asked, "can I go play now?"

Jaken nodded at him. He left the room and ran down the hall to the public dining room. His mother was directing demons and humans around the hall about where they should place big garlands of flowers. The hunters were gathering in the front of the hall. Rin stood in front of them after sending another bunch of flowers to the corner of the dining room. Harutoga ran after her, "can I go to the village?"

"We'll need five sika, three bore and ten ducks," she directed them. Hisato stood nearby as he always did. Sato his brother was part of the hunting party, so was Hineko, Akari's lover and two of their sons that weren't quite old enough to live on their own yet. Tadashi would join them when they exited the barrier.

"Can I go to the village?" He asked again.

"Go on," the mother answered quickly.

He made it three steps before Hisato grasped his shoulder, "where is your guard little one?"

"Keeping Yuki busy," Harutoga answered and started walking again.

"Taisho!" Hisato yelled loudly.

His cousin came running from the corner of the dining hall, katana strapped to his hip. "Yes?"

"Take Harutoga to the village and stay with him until Katsumoto finds you," Hisato is the primary sentinel in charge. It was because he watched over Ka-san that he got to order everyone else around.

"Sure, come on!" Taisho held out his hand the two ran out of the house through the fields to the village.

**Evening**

When evening came after he'd spent the entire day in the village, Harutoga was ready to go home. He yawned just as his stomach began to rumble. He chuckled holding it. He would finish the last game of hide and seek with his friends. There was a group of boys his age, two of them were twin leopard hanyous and the other one was a hanyou fox demon who liked to play tricks on the other kids. Harutoga's sense of smell was the most keen of all of them, except his friend Eiji had better vision than him and could hear everything. When they hid from Eiji they had to keep their breathing as quiet as possible. This time Harutoga hid inside a log. He slowed his breathing until it was completely inaudible and held his breath. Eiji was getting closer. They were near the lake at the edge of the border. Children weren't allowed on the other side of the barrier without their parents or another grown up. It was too dangerous. His stomach grumbled again and then a mess of red hair flipped over his hiding place, "got you." Eiji tagged him.

"Harutoga!" Katsumoto called from the trees, "it's time to go home."

"Let me go bastard!" Yuki shrieked at her guard.

"I said it's time to go home Yuki, if you don't like it, then don't fight me," Katsumoto had her hands twisted into a knot with his whip. "What a pathetic show."

"I hate you!" She tried to kick dirt at the dog-demon's shins.

"The feeling is very mutual brat," Katsumoto bit back at her. "Now stop struggling and start walking or I'll drag you back," he gave her a good shove between the shoulders.

Harutoga laughed as he joined them. The sun was just beginning to set. "Bye!" He waved to his friends as they started their walk back to their home. "You're a brat Yuki."

"Shut up Haru!"

"You're supposed to call me Harutoga," he corrected her and started to trot to get home faster.

"Says who?" Yuki ran after him rolling her eyes at Katsumoto.

"Chichiue," he reminded her.

"Yeah well he's not here," Yuki growled at her brother in warning. "I hate him," she snarled at Katsumoto who flew above them.

"Brat," Harutoga stuck his tongue out.

As they approached the house Harutoga pulled up short. "What's that smell?" There was a new smell in the home that he was sure had not been there before. He had smelled it in his grandmother's castle, but surely she hadn't come to their home. He opened the door to the dining room to find Natsuki sitting by a basket that held his little brother and her own baby. He ran up to her and attempted to pick up the baby, "what are you doing here? Soba-sama said you aren't supposed to be here."

"I'm invited," the female demoness said simply.

"The hell you are!" Yuki raised an angry green hand. "Get out!"

It was caught by Hisato. "Enough, go to dinner."

"Bite me!" Yuki shrieked at him.

"If only I wouldn't get in trouble if I did," Hisato grabbed her upper arm and dragged her to the door to the private corridor. "Go now." When Hisato sounded like that, Harutoga knew that Yuki wouldn't test him. He saved that voice for when she was out of control and it almost always ended with her tied up.

"Why are you here?" Harutoga's eyes left his sister and fell on the white haired she demon. "You aren't supposed to come here."

"I'm helping your mother," she rocked the basket with the two boys with her foot. "This little one hasn't stopped shrieking since your father left," she touched the child's chin. "Your grandmother knows I'm here. Hisato sent for me. Tsukimaru and Taiyomaru are good friends."

He leaned over the basket to find his black haired brother curled up sleeping next to his white haired half-brother. Their fingers were intertwined. "I don't like you," Harutoga stood at his full height which barely reached her head while she was sitting.

"You don't smell so wonderful yourself," she said quickly.

"You made them mad at each other," there are things he still didn't understand about what happened.

Then Natsuki did something he didn't expect. She knelt down on one knee and put a hand on his right shoulder. Her eyes were golden and pretty but he still didn't like her. "I'm sorry. It was wrong of me, to cause so much pain to your family. I know I can't make up for it. I can't undo what happened, but I hope you'll at least let me try."

"Chichiue said it was instinct, he doesn't love you."

"That's enough Harutoga," Hisato took him by the shoulder and led him to the private corridor. "It's dinner time."

As they walked away Harutoga asked, "why did Soba-sama let her come here? I don't want her here. I hate her."

Hisato followed the child down the hall, "life can't be ruled by emotions little one. Do you know that at one time your Uncle an Father hated each other?"

He'd heard of it. He nodded his head.

"Your mother is trying to stop that from happening between you and your brother Tsukimaru. That hatred led to your father losing his left arm and nearly losing his life. You will live a long time and there is no point in spending that time hating a brother you don't even know." Hisato opened the door to the dining room.

"Does Soba-sama love him more than us?"

"No."

**Night-time**

Nighttime was always quiet in the house. The majority of the servants left and returned to the village. Harutoga took a bath with his sister and both his little brothers. The two mothers spoke quietly about their lives as children. The only thing Harutoga picked up on was that Natsuki had a baby too early. "The first heat usually comes near the end of the third century and into the early part of the fourth century. It was stupid." She pursed her lips as she held her baby in the water letting the bath ripple over his face. "Is there a too early for humans?"

"Kagome-sama says we have babies too early as it is. In her time women wait until they are well into their twenties. My age, but I had my first baby when I was seventeen and if we hadn't stopped the first time I would have been sixteen."

"Does she have to be here?" Yuki asked from the end of the bath.

"Don't be rude," Rin picked up a luffa and threw it at Yuki's face.

Harutoga laughed as his sister was covered in bubbles down her nose and high cheekbones. He finished quickly and climbed out of the bath.

"I'm not looking forward to him screaming all night," his mother said of the baby. Taiyomaru giggled and chewed on Tsukimaru's clenched fist. "You're going to bite him," she wiggled Tsukimaru's fist out of Taiyomaru's mouth.

"Don't worry, his skin is already very strong," Natsuki lifted both babies out of the water. "I can hold them if you want while you put these two in bed. I'll have to leave soon though. Any longer and he'll know I was here."

Harutoga changed into his sleeping yukata after he dried his hair. He laid down in his bed with Yuki on the other side. Their mother tucked them both in, giving them big kisses and hugs before she left the room. He yawned and stretched then reached into his pocket and pulled out his moonstone that Chichiue had given him so long ago. He brought the black stone to his lips and kissed it. "Goodnight Chichiue," he muttered next to the stone.

_Goodnight little one…_

**Please review!**

**SessRinLoverx2: **Yeah yokai don't need to exist but these are my stories and I like them, so this is how they ended up. Again a review that says he usually is something. You see there are thousands of stories on fanfiction that usually pretty much tell the same story, and 2/3rds of them are incomplete and will never finish. So if you want to read the same story told 1,000 different ways, that may or may not be completed there are so many for you to find. Personally I think like this gives the characters more growth and creates sustainable, original plotlines. In my minds eyes, why would he know about something he didn't care about? At 700 it was obvious he hated the idea of love (movie 3) and had no intention of ever loving anyone, human or demon.

He was not a Lord before Sesshomaru's Fear. That is a mistranslations of the Japanese. The suffix -sama cna mean many things not always Lord. That is how it was translated into English. He had no lands in my stories until he began taking them in the end of Sesshomaru's Fear. It's said in the manga and the anime that he was making his own lands, everyone else took the Western Lands thing and ran with it...fine if they did but that wasn't my direction. Nobility had nothing to do with Instinct. It was all a plot by his demented half-brother.


	36. Hisato's Bond

**Thank you for the reviews on the last chapter. This is for Warriormaiden60. The conclusion of Hisato and his bond to Gobodo-sama. I love these two as a couple. They make me so giddy.**

**And I have about two short chapters of the Disease written although this is me on my semi-hiatus. Whatever my second class is starting so we'll see what that does to my time. I'm getting this up now. I want to write Sota's wedding then this series will probably stall for a bit so in my free time I can work on Trafficked and the Disease. **

**If anyone wants a sneak peek of the first chapter of the Disease let me know. I will either post it in it's own story or here in drabbles.**

**Hisato's Bond**

She spent seventy five years toying with him, enticing him, attempting to get Hisato to return the bond that was only half created. Several times he succumbed to her temptations always stopping himself from finishing inside of her. He would leave her so hard he felt like he would explode and break from the pressure. He would spend a day in a cold river on the mainland just to recover from those episodes. It wasn't that Hisato was blind. Ever since he was a young yokai just over two hundred and fifty years old, he had begun to notice her. The white of her skin was like candy to his eyes. The sound of her voice drove him up the walls. He would take on more duties, as long as it meant that he could be closer to her. Yet he refused to succumb to his desires knowing that she deserved better.

Her first lover was said to be more powerful than even Inu no Taisho. He could never give her a child to rival the power of Sesshomaru or even the lesser power of Touma. Touma's father she had killed shortly after the child was born. "Punishment for impregnating me with a twisted child," she had said of Kazemaru, the silver haired yokai who had alleviated her heat in that century.

Who was he to take her and bond her? He was nothing. A decedent of a human. She would always outshine him and he knew that when his death came another would come that could fulfill the bond to her. Someone regal, not from so humble beginnings as he.

Sesshomaru had once caught him watching his mother and said, "you reek of humanity, an abomination. The pity she shows on your family is detestable," then walked away as prideful and spiteful as ever. It was two centuries before just before Sesshomaru's father was killed.

He had considered on more than one occasion getting revenge against Sesshomaru. Even then though, the pure-blooded Inu-yokai was too strong. It would have been suicide. The thought remained with him until one day a century later he was approached by the younger brother Touma who was sporting an injured eye that refused to heal. "Wouldn't it be wonderful to make my dear brother pay for the insult he laid to your family all those years ago?"

"I'm not an idiot Touma," Hisato threw the comment off as he made his circuit around the wing where Gobodo-sama resided in the castle in the sky. "Sesshomaru-sama would kill me and I would leave my mother and father mourners."

"Come to me when you are ready Hisato," Touma cackled, "I will help you get your revenge."

"With that eye. It smells of his dokkasu," Hisato nearly felt sorry for Touma. They were around the same age give or take a few years and had grown up together. Sesshomaru was already over four hundred years of age, arrogant, powerful and clearly his mother's favorite. She never collected Touma's fangs the way she did Sesshomaru's. She never spoke of him and some even said she refused to admit that Touma was even her son. As soon as he was weaned, which she did as early as possible she sent him to an Uncle. Out of sight out of mind. She visited him occasionally, but that was it.

"One day Hisato…one day," he snarled.

Then the day came that she called him to her. She didn't send emissaries as she had in the past. This time she came as he hunted his prey in the form of a lesser pure-blooded Inu-yokai who had smeared his family's honor. He was getting ready to pounce when he felt a familiar hand on his shoulder, "now is not a good time," he continued crouching in the bushes.

"Isn't it?" Gobodo-sama laughed. "That one…isn't he the one that called your grandmother the daughter of a bastard and your mother a pig?"

"You can see then, why this is not a good time," he drew his katanas from their sheathes.

"Shall I dispatch of him for you?" She giggled walking around Hisato.

"You can let me have my prey," he pushed her hand off his shoulder. "You are an infuriating woman."

She folded her arms and leaned against a piscea tree picking at her nails. "Go on then."

_Stupid, _he cursed the demon. The enemy was just over six hundred years old, newly bonded with his lover expecting a child. If he had wanted to live to see his child, he should have kept his mouth shut. Hisato leapt from the bushes and the battle began. The inu-yokai removed his own sword, not before Hisato shot two hot white lights taking out the legs of the black haired Inu-yokai. Blood splattered the white rocks of the forest floor and the nearing trees. "Cousin?" The demon squalled.

"It's too late for that cousin," Hisato jabbed one sword through the belly of the demon and the other he held against his neck. "I truly regret making your lover a widow." He slashed his head off. "But honor is everything." He wiped the blood from his katanas.

"His lover is going to come looking for a fight, and she is much more powerful than you are," Gobodo-sama came from the tall green white spireas, pushing their white petaled roses to the side.

"Then I'll meet an early end," he sheathed his katanas.

"You disappoint me Hisato. If she so much as touches you, then she will be dead," she circled him running her palms over his chest. She stopped by his heart, "now give me what I want."

"The answer is the same as it has been for the last seventy five years Gobodo-sama. I will not shame you by making you mine. You deserve someone better than I," he flew into the air, intent on escaping the scene of death before the widow found the body of her lover and came after him.

Gobodo-sama was hot on his heels, "it is no shame to bond what is yours."

"You belong to no yokai," Hisato said firmly intent on getting away from her.

She caught him by the arm, "you have been speaking to my son."

"And?"

"If you intend on following Touma, you will meet a most unfortunate end. Why do you listen to him?"

"If you haven't noticed, having the small drops of human blood in my body does not garner me friends. I do not fit in your world or the human world. He offers me an ally," he held her shoulder. Her skin was soft to his touch, warm. These meetings were getting harder and harder for him to resist.

"He is a snake," Gobodo-sama spit on the clouds beneath them. "Return my bond and protect yourself. He still seeks revenge against Sesshomaru. Return the bond and be my eyes and ears."

"You want me to spy on him?" Hisato started laughing holding his stomach, "and what ally would I gain from this venture."

"The most powerful one," she cupped his chin and laid fire on his lips. "Return to the castle with me. Now."

He pulled his head back, breaking the kiss that turned his insides into molten lava. He swallowed hard trying to remember his resolve, "how can the sun live in the shadow of the moon?" He ran the back of his fingers down her face.

"Will you quit that," she slapped his hand down. "You are ridiculous. Do you know how many yokai would and have killed for the chance you have now?"

"Then they don't appreciate your value, Gobodo-sama," he let his lips fall on hers. The palm of his hand eased into the dip of her back pulling her closer. "You will tell no one." He licked her plump pink lips, "this is our secret."

She nodded, tension finally leaving her body. "Follow me to my chambers." She flashed into a bright white light, returning to her home.

They found each other quickly. Seventy five years of teasing bubbled into Hisato hovering over an expectant Gobodo-sama as she opened for him. "Do it," she caressed his chin, "let it take over you," her lids closed then opened fighting back a sheen of red. "Do not impregnate me," she bit the words out difficultly.

"I don't know how," he admitted, his fangs growing, his nails extending. His eyes flushed in color from white to red. He held onto her shoulders. A sheen of sweat covered her skin, "you smell intoxicating." It was as if he couldn't breathe, the winds of power swept through him. A feral growl escaped his lips.

She pressed her hand to his heart, sending calming waves, "feel the difference between the two," she clutched his arm in one hand while cupping his face in the other. "If you make me go into heat…" she warned him.

"It's too powerful," he couldn't fight the feeling as he entered. She was too sweet, too hot and the hurricane inside of him, the gale storm had already taken him. Just behind it, he could sense another power, the one that would make her his, but he wanted both. He couldn't resist. "I can't," he made the first move.

Her eyes covered in red, "stop Hisato," she pushed on his chest, her last attempt to gain some sanity over the situation.

"One soul," he grunted, "our soul," he couldn't take it. He clutched onto both powers channeling them into Gobodo-sama.

"Hisato no!" She screamed at him, attempting to expel him from her body, only her mind and her body were at odds with each other.

"Become one with me," his tongue flicked over his elongated fangs.

She lost her composure and that was the end until long into the next morning.

He sat naked by her bed on the floor, covered by only a sheet. His palm rest over his heart with a new sense of warmth. He could sense her annoyance and frustration with him and something else just beyond that. He would almost call it love, but that word didn't fit her. "I'm sorry."

"You're an idiot," she rolled onto her stomach so her head could rest against in the crook of his neck. "I should have known better than to ask you to control the two energies."

"How long until we know," he breathed heavily trying to catch his breath.

"Days," she said depressed. "It would not be beyond me to have you killed for this."

"It wasn't my intention Gobodo-sama," he held her slender fingers in his hand.

"You may call me dear one," she slid out of the bed onto his lap.

He stroked the dappled teeth marks on her neck, "must I stare at this?"

"I loved him Hisato. Accept it. We no longer leave these markings on each other. They were foolish and animalistic. Dogs bite each other on the necks when they mate. We are more than beasts in the field. I always wondered if your stripes went all the way down there," she traced the two stripes on either side of his stomach down to his thighs.

He hissed in pleasure. "Will you tease me for centuries about this?"

"For the rest of your pathetic life. I intend to outlive you," she kissed the underside of his chin.

"You will always be my radiant sun," he kissed her mouth. "And for that, this between us. None will know of it."

"If it is your wish," she rested against him. "If it is your wish," she rest a hand on her belly in wonder.

**Please review! Forgive the soft sex scene in this one. Honestly I was experimenting with innuendos. The Disease I want to keep rated T when I write it, so I am trying to see how I can point to sex scenes without being as explicit as I have been in the past.**

**Guest #1: **Sooo...I get your feelings, but it's obvious your feelings are playing out in how the story went instead of what the character actually felt. Obviously no matter what Sesshomaru experiences people are going to make him the villain...so I don't have a lot to say.

**Guest #2:** HAHA you may be correct. It's no secret though it said it in the last chapter of Instinct.

**Consistent Guest: **Read the last chapter of Instinct and the last chapter of InuXKag drabbles. You may be correct. Which makes it soooo funny

**Guest #3:** That's a great idea but not the direction I am going thank you for the suggestion though!

**Guest #4:** Their bond will not be broken again. Forgive me for the short response but I am over the reviews about Sess not respecting Rin and it being all about her although they are making for some great inspiration for a fight scene I wrote in the Disease. They have both had to give up a lot to be together. Just no one takes into account his side of the coin, I'm guessing because he is a male, because it's a fandom norm. I don't know...anyway please continue to review.


	37. Sneak Peek: The DiseaseThe End

**Sneak Peek at, "The End" or "The Disease" I may change the name. The first chapter is up on my profile. This is a later chapter and partially a fan request. **

**This is when Rin goes through the Well and then returns. **

**Rin**

She wakes up first. Finding herself worried. Sesshomaru left quickly, with little warning. Everyone was too busy to notice that Gobodo-sama herself had called him away. He knows his mother's yoki so well. She sighs, the years have been easier since the Ogre King was killed. Her life is lighter. She still worries when he goes to the castle in the sky, fearful that being so close to Natsuki's yoki will reel him in again. But she has learned to trust him when he says that he doesn't feel the need to return to her.

She stretches out aching joints. In her home she has a comfortable futon to sleep on. Here it's just a bamboo mat that barely cushions the joints. She goes to relieve herself knowing that Hisato is following from a distance protecting her privacy. When she is finished she hears footsteps behind her. Kagome runs to her and holds her hand, "I figured it out."

"Figured what out?" Rin has no idea. She is tired, she didn't sleep well and she misses Sesshomaru.

"Come on," she grabs Rin's hand and leads her to the Well. She goes in herself first and disappears for a few minutes. "What is she up to?" She asks Taisho who is standing by the well.

His muscles harden as he leans over it. "Hisato, you can take a break if you want. I'll watch her."

"Why do I get the feeling you are up to something?" Hisato folds his arms, he always folds his arms. His golden eyes harden like amber as he stairs Rin down. "Rin-sama?"

"Go on. I'll yelp if I need you," she says happy to be with her extended family. _Family, _she thinks of the word. Twenty years before she was an eight year old girl in a village where no one wanted her. She was beaten for stealing fish to eat, she was half starved and probably would have died the next winter if Sesshomaru hadn't found her. _You found me, _she hears his voice in her head. Like always, he insists, she found him. So many years together and the only words she uses for him in private is _my love. _He calls her, _my heart, _and between them they know what it means. He can feel because of her. She has a hard time imagining what he was like before she met him despite the stories she was told.

Then they made love and became more, now she is related through marriage to Inuyasha and Kagome and has nieces and nephews, a yokai lover, three children and an overbearing controlling mother in law.

Kagome climbs back through, "kami this was easier when I was a teenager," she hands a bag full of treats to Taisho.

"What are you doing?" Rin asks them.

"Sending you through," together Kagome and Taisho set their hands on the protruding wooden lip of the well.

"You figured it out?" More than once Rin has wanted to see him in the future, to know the kind of yokai he has become. She worries about what will happen when age takes her. She's nearly thirty, yet she still feels like she did in her early twenties. She smiles, wondering what he will think of her.

"I just called him, now to convince the well to let you go through," pink and blue spiritual energy swirls around the mother and son feeding into the well.

"Oka!" Izayoi calls from the distance with a backpack on. Mayumi follows behind her older sister. Instead of leaving for the night they decided to stay. They leap through the Well and disappear.

She never believes it when she sees it. She is even less inclined to think it will work this time.

"You need different clothes," Kagome throws her another bag. "Put that on."

Rin removes the garment from the bag. She knows it's clothes from Kagome's time. She even knows how to put them on, hiding behind her kimono for modesty. She steps out dressed like a woman from the future. "Take this," she hands her katana to Kagome. She climbs over the side of the well and carefully leaps in. At first she lands in the mud, nothing happens.

"Just wait!" Kagome calls, "don't stay longer than an hour. I don't know how long we can hold it!"

She is swallowed in a mixture of neon blue and bright pink lights that wrap around her body. It takes her breath away as she is sent to the other side.

**Sesshomaru-past**

"What is the meaning of this?" He questions his mother as he lands at the steps of her castle. She herself had come for him demanding his presence. Lining the stairs are rows of demons higher up in the aristocratic ranks of Inu-yokai, including Kensaku. They are dressed in pompous robes of various royal colors, representing the different clans of Inu-yokai. They are of silver, black and brown hair. Off to the side, Natsuki lingers holding their son in her arms. He curses that the very sight of her, causes a pinch in his heart. He catches her gaze for a moment before turning on his mother in a fury.

Gobodo-sama catches his arm, "Kensaku has filed a formal complaint."

He tightens his lip, but then something happens. He feels his bond to Rin fade. He stares at the dog demon, silver haired and pompous, single stripes under the eyes, fangs like them all, with four mokomokos. He is by far in age Sesshomaru's superior but fails to match him in strength. He grips the hilt of his katana angrily. Something is wrong, he can't feel Rin any longer. He turns to leave as quickly as he came.

Gobodo-sama catches his arm again, "this has to be dealt with."

"It can wait," he rips his arm loose.

"He isn't going to let it go," she follows him down the steps, "dammit, Sesshomaru stop. You don't understand what is at stake!"

His bottom lip trembles in rage. The only outward sign of his anger, "why is she here?" He can't help but stare at Tsukimaru. He looks like a six month old now. He wobbles when he walks, the baby is already struggling to get out of his mother's grasp and jump into his arms. His hair is mousy and curled around his ears making for a silver snowfall. He cries, frustrated that she won't release him.

_I'm sorry, _Natsuki mouths to him.

He ignores her, consumed by the lack of Rin's bond in his awareness. His thumb finds the scar. It's still there, so it hasn't broken, but her awareness is gone. "He has threatened an all-out war if you continue to shame his daughter."

"I have done nothing to his daughter!" He bites back at his mother too furious to speak further.

"That is the problem. Return in three days. I will hold him off that long," Gobodo-sama allows him to leave.

"Your meddling is what caused this in the first place," he spits at her.

"If I hadn't, he would have challenged you with an army loyal to him. Even you the Great Sesshomaru would not have survived that. It is not our way to spurn one to make the other happy Sesshomaru. Your human must learn to accept Natsuki as part of your life," she walks away so gracefully unannoyed he wants to slit her throat. He jumps into the air and calls on his yoki to glide back to the village where he left his lover. He can't feel her, and that alone makes his heart race.

He is brought out of his thoughts by a clawed hand attempting to catch his neck. He grabs it so forcefully, the hand leaves the wrist spurting blood on his mokomoko. It's one of Kensaku's guards and another right behind them. "You disgrace your kind!" One of them yells at him.

He cares not for their words. For this vermin, his katana is unnecessary. He revels in the feeling of warm blood dripping down his fingers, staining his garment. He slashes the second one in the stomach as they twist in the wind, and then turns on the one who's hand he removed breaking his neck. "Simple vermin," he has an idea now what is going on and what this meeting will entail.

As he lands in the village, Hisato is resting in a tree with his eyes closed. He slashes the branch out from underneath the sleeping demon with his whip, sending him falling. To his regret Hisato catches himself before he lands back first in the mulching leaves. "Where is she?"

"With Taisho," Hisato rights himself. "I did not leave her unprotected. She is as safe here, as she is home, you know that or you wouldn't have allowed her to grow up here."

He takes affront at that comment and lashes out, relieving some of his frustration on Hisato. The black haired demon, bound to his mother ducks, the first few blows, then a blocks his kicks and his slashing claws. Years of training together has made Hisato that much more cunning. He finally grabs him by the neck and roars, "what is Kensaku doing?"

"It is not our custom to spurn one lover to make the other happy, Sesshomaru-sama. He claims you have humiliated his daughter and shunned her. If you don't allow Natsuki to live with you, and you continue to refuse to honor the bond you made to her, he will bring a force and attack your home."

"Rin," he doesn't need the answer, he knows who the target will be.

"Yes," Hisato pushes the clawed hand off his neck. Together they walk into the clearing where the Well is. She suddenly springs in his awareness, her scent returns strongly, but coated in something foreign. Something that makes no sense.

**Rin**

She knows she is in trouble the moment she sees him coming from the trees. Immediately she backs away from him. His eyes are raging, they're near turning red. She is still dressed in the modern clothing. She hasn't had a chance to wash the scent of the older Sesshomaru from her body. Tears still stain her cheeks. It was so hard saying good-bye to him knowing that her death caused a permanent hole in his heart that was never filled.

"Where were you?" He fumes at her.

"I…" she knows she has to lie.

Kagome is shaking her head over his towering shoulder and motioning Taisho to be quiet. No one knows about Sesshomaru of the future but Rin and Kagome and now the teenage boy. She knows that secrecy is must. If the yokai before her knew that he would turn into a doctor that treated humans, he really would refuse just to spite himself. She is proud of who he will become and for that she must lie to the one she loves the most.

"Um…I was here," it is a ridiculous attempt to hide the truth from him, especially dressed the way she is.

"Wearing this?" He tugs at the front of her dress with his index finger. It dips low showing a fair amount of her chest.

"Yes," she forces confidence to flow from her lips.

He raises an eyebrow at her gripping her arm just above the elbow joint. He storms off with her into the forest, "where were you?"

They're covered by bushes and trees out of everyone's eyeshot and she prays earshot because he is furious. His nose is in her neck, running up her jawbone and stops over her lips. His fingers clasp over her chin, sniffing the plump petals, "someone kissed you."

"Someone in the village," she knows it was the wrong thing to say the second it leaves her lips.

"I don't smell him. What I do smell is a liar," his fingers hurt her chin, leaving marks on her face.

Tears leave her eyes, her face stings, "you're hurting me," she tells him attempting to move his hand. "Let go," she shoves him backwards rubbing her chin.

He closes the distance between them. "Tell me the truth," he nuzzles the mark he left. "You are keeping something from me."

"What happened at your mother's?" She asks him just as boldly, hoping that the subject change will help.

"Nothing," he says just as quickly as her words.

"You're lying to me," she wraps her arms around his shoulder. "Can't you just accept that some heated male thought I was beautiful and decided to kiss me?" That wasn't an entire lie. She hoped it was enough to silence him. She runs the back of her hand down the side of his face, "what's wrong?"

His face is more lined than it was in the past. He looks thoroughly exasperated with her. It makes her giddy knowing that she has this much control over him.

He doesn't speak but she recognizes the look in his eye, the one of possession, the one that screams _mine. _His nose sniffs down the front of the dress, a claw slitting into the fabric down the back baring her skin to him as he does. The dress drips down her shoulders. "Does this mean you forgive me?"

"This means I remove a cloth that smells foreign," he pulls a leg over his shoulder as he kneels down and his nose finds somewhere else that makes her fingers dig into his shoulders. She can hear him sniffing, the uptake of wind both tickling and arousing. He scoffs, "he only kissed you."

"I promise, kami Sesshomaru, not here. Someone will hear," fire shoots through her. Now he is control and she can only hang on for dear life.

"Then I suggest, you try to not make so much noise," he pushes her onto the forest floor pinning her back to the leaves and throwing her dress aside.

**Please review! Also if you think "The End" should be rated M please tell me. I'd be happy to write more explicit scenes. I was just going to experiment not writing them but even I'm having trouble not putting them in LOL.**

**And Dammit should I call this, "The Disease" or "The End"? Drop a review and let me know.**

**Estherale247: **_Honey if you want it rated M I may change my mind. A lot of my FF is just practice writing. HAHA trust me if you are vehement I can make it rated M and give you the scenes you are looking for._

**Guest #1:** _We won't find out about Hisato/Gobodo-sama until The End...sheesh I almost like the Disease as a title better. _

**_Guest #2:_**_ She was not bound to Touma's father. The only other person she was ever bound to was the father of her daughter that was killed. Also in general it's hinted at the Gobodo-sama is stronger than Sesshomaru. In Magatsuhi's evil will it's hinted at the Sesshomaru at that point surpassed his father. His mother could still kick his ass so it wouldn't be that hard for her to kill Touma's father who she was not bound to._

**_Warriormaiden60:_**_ Your welcome! So glad to finally finish that. The inspiration took forever to come! We don't find out until the next story when/if they ever had a baby. If they did the child would be in the thirties._

**_Guest #4: _**_Because if she killed Touma I wouldn't have a story tell...like no stories! I needed a villain that could rival Sesshomaru. Besides she isn't completely heartless. It wasn't until he killed Hisato that she decided to take things into her own hands._

**Guest #5&6:** _Assuming you are the same person my husband wants to know if you auditioning for best breakup? Just curious LOL._


	38. The Disease Sneak Peek part 2

**Okay...so I have been thinking of rolling the reincarnation story into the disease because it flashes back and forth between modern and past...what do you guys think? I honestly don't think I can write a story that is just a reincarnation story. I kind of suck at that kind of writing. You guys know me, I'm all angsty and need my drama. So this is what I first wrote for it. I might make this the second chapter of the Disease. But it needs editing and I need to fix the end because I want Taka to go missing after this. So anyway opinions.**

It happened often these days. More-so in the last seventy years since Lover's Park became an official protected area of Osaka. People abandoned children on the bench that rested beneath the sakura tree. Sometimes there was a letter attached with pertinent details, sometimes there wasn't. It happened frequently enough that Sesshomaru asked one of his children to spend the night in the park one day a week to cover the days when he was on call. The only child that didn't was his willowy daughter Taka. Natsuki held a lingering fear that should her daughter step foot among man, she would be stricken with the same illness that massacred their kind.

That is why Tsukimaru lounged in the branches of the Sakura tree. He lived with his human lover in Mount Koya in a Vista hidden from the human eye. Every Saturday evening flew down and spent the evening in the large park that was once his father's home with the human Rin. He brought his children to fan out around the park, in case a child was left in some other cranny of the grassy expanse. He had met Rin on many occasions when his mother would visit their home. He and Taiyomaru had always been exceptionally close despite the circumstances of his birth and the turmoil he caused. He wore his hair long past his waist. His youthful appearance was that of a sixteen year old. It was braided tightly behind his back, the tips of his ears tucked in. His mokomoko wrapped around his left shoulder, similar to his fathers. He made no effort in the hollow of evening to hide more than his ears. His cheeks carried the same double magenta stripes, his nails long, his forehead crescent mooned. The only difference were the stripes across the backs of his shoulders. His sensitive nose was just as well attuned as his fathers.

That is why it was no surprise when he saw a couple scuttling through what used to be the forest behind the home carrying a sleeping bundle with them. His father had asked them to guard the park at night after an infant had died on the park bench from exposure in the seventies. His golden eyes tracked down. They smelled of the earth and fields, of flowers and vegetation. They probably came from the mountain regions. They set a sleeping child on the bench then said a prayer by the statue of the dog with red eyes that spouted water from its mouth. Tsukimaru shook his head disappointed. There was even an orphanage that had been named after Lover's Park. Their family supported it financially. Where Sesshomaru had found his place in medicine, Tsukimaru still preferred a quieter life away from humans, although he had bonded one. He wrote tails of the past that were highly popularized.

They wore plain clothing that was tattered with holes. They left an envelope on the sleeping child's chest. The female human bent down and laid her lips on the child's forehead. They disappeared into the trees. He flew out of the tree, picking up the envelope. He sliced it open with the tip of his forefinger. It was written in broken Kanji, the letters sloppy and almost unreadable.

_No money. Sick. Blind. No hearing. No speaking. Find home. Thank you. Five years old._

He had learned from his own father how to sniff for illness. He bent over the sleeping child and inhaled deeply. His eyes bolted open. He drew in a deeper breath through his nose. His bottom lip trembled. He knew this smell. It was impossible. How could this child carry this scent? He dipped his nose into the sleeping child's neck, taking it in at a closer range. _Morning dew. _He refused to believe it. He had to act fast.

His children still looked like children despite being over fifty years old. He had four in quick succession, the fourth to spite his father and outdo him. "Shinobu, Shoumaru," he called to his eldest two sons. He knew they were nearby.

Two white haired children with cat ears on top of their heads came running from the bushes. "What is it Chichiue?" Shoumaru the eldest asked. They could pass for quadruplets the same way his father's hanyous looked like triplets. They stood the size of eight year olds despite the eighty years they had been alive. Shoumaru had single magenta stripes on his cheeks, a moon on his forehead, and claws. His hair went to his shoulders as he stood in the moonlight. "Another one? At least it's been a few months since the last one."

"Guard her," Tsukimaru hovered into the air.

"Where are you going Chichiue?" Shinobu questioned his father, "Sofu-sama said to take them to the orphanage if we found them."

"Do not question me," Tsukimaru reprimanded them. "Guard her." He alighted into the autumn air, glad that cold did not affect him. He headed to his father's home in the sky. He knew that his father would not be there. He was not in Japan. There was a conference of Oncologists in Australia and a new outbreak of the disease in the outback among those yokai that had sought refuge there. It wasn't his parents he sought, it was his sister. The castle had been moved so it hovered just over Lovers Park making the trip less taxing on their father. He hovered by the door outside of Taka's room. He banged the wooden frame until she opened it dressed in an elaborate emerald green kimono with several layers beneath it. "Come with me," he grabbed Taka by the wrist and yanked her out the door.

She had her own slender mokomoko that looped around her waist. "Tsukimaru, I'm not allowed to go down there!" She protested. "Chichiue and Hahaue don't want me too."

"You can't live your life forever trapped in the castle. What will you do when your first heat comes?" Tsukimaru laughed, "ask Katsumoto to impregnate you?"

She snarled at her brother. "Perhaps Chichiue will find someone suited to me in the next sixty years."

"We are the last of our kind Taka," they landed by the park bench. "There are no others." He knelt down and sniffed the child again. "Did she wake?" He asked his sons.

"No," Shoumaru answered sitting cross legged on the ground near the sakura tree. "She cannot hear? Or see?"

"That is what the letter said," he passed the envelope to Taka.

"Chichiue will kill me if he finds out I left the castle," Taka twitched nervously.

"You'll take a long bath, he won't be back for two weeks anyway," Tsukimaru reminded her. He knew this smell, the smell of morning dew, the smell of fresh flowers, the smell of _her. _"Taka, you will take this child to another country. Anywhere but here."

"What?" Taka gasped covering her mouth. "Chichiue told you to take the children found here to the orphanage."

"No," Tsukimaru said quickly, "this one is different. Can't you smell it?" He growled low remembering how his mother had suffered in her heat waiting for his father to come and help her. She locked herself in her room for months crying, sweat covered, smelling sick. Even then, his father only stayed long enough he knew now to relieve her before he returned to this very spot where he buried his dead lover under the boughs of the sakura leaves. "It's her."

"Who?" Taka wasn't following his train of thought. She sniffed the air tasting it with her nose. "Eww she stinks like dirt."

"Her family was probably farmers," Tsukimaru inferred. "Taka, take her. Take her to China, to Russia, to England. I don't care where. She can't remain here."

"Why?" Taka tenderly removed the hair from the child's face. She had scars over her eyes, bruises on her cheeks. "She looks as if she was beaten. Do all humans smell like this."

"Obasan, maybe you should spend less time in the sky," Shinobu laughed. "She smells like a farmer's child."

"Take her Taka, now," Tsukimaru roared at his sister. "She is her. Father's human lover. I can smell it on her. They share the same scent, the nose and the cheeks are the same. I have seen pictures of this human when she was a child. She cannot stay here."

"You think Chichiue would fall in love with her again?" Taka finally picked up on Tsukimaru's concern. "Why does that matter? Haha-ue doesn't love him, we know that."

Tsukimaru only spared her an annoyed glance, shaking his head sadly. "You really are naïve. Pick her up and find somewhere for her to go that is not in Japan. Return before Haha-ue and Chichiue do. Wash yourself well so they don't suspect you were out."

"What if I get sick?" She protested.

Tsukimaru exhaled exasperated, "then your brothers will rescue you."

"You know they don't like me," she complained hefting the sleeping child into her arms.

"He may not like you but Taiyomaru would not let you die," he gave her a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek. "Go my sister."

"Do you want to know where I take her?" Taka picked up the little child and the envelope.

"No," Tsukimaru replied. He spared a look at his two sons, "you will say nothing to Sofu-sama, Soba-sama or your sister and brother."

"It's really her?" Taka sniffed the shoulder of the girl. "How is she sleeping through this?"

"She can't hear," Tsukimaru touched the child's cheek with the back of her fingers. "And," he smelled her mouth, "they drugged her." He shook his head sadly. "Go Taka, before whatever it is they gave her wears off. They return in two weeks. That's long enough to take her out of the country."

"Tsukimaru he loved her…if this is her…why shouldn't he meet her? He misses her." Taka had never met Rin. She had only heard stories about her from her father and brother. Her hanyou siblings avoided her, were angry with her and refused to speak to her.

"He will break Haha-ue's heart," Tsukimaru bellowed, "if that happens their bond will break. We cannot risk it."

"She doesn't love him!" Taka fought back unsure of this decision.

"Yes she does. You just don't see it and neither does he. I will not let a child break them apart. Take her out of the country, to China, to Korea, to Vietnam, anywhere but here," Tsukimaru whistled signaling for the rest of his children. "Now Taka!" He screamed at his sister.

She jolted at the intensity of his voice, flying into the air with the child in her arms. "I'm sorry little one…I can't let you

hurt Haha-ue," she lingered a tender kiss onto the child's forehead. "Where should I take you?"

****Announcements****

**The first chapter of the Disease is up, go check it out.**

**For Nanowrimo I'm writing about living with chronic disease. (No wonder I angst write). To read that please visit my wattpad account. Same username and the link is in my profile.**

**So opinions please...I want his Natsuki's children to stand in the way and Taka will stay with the girl in dog form...that's my idea but it's going to be rolled into the plotline of the Disease.**


	39. Author's Note and Review Responses

**Okay wow, I forgot to respond to everyone's reviews in my last post, I am so sorry. I will get to the responses in a minute. First off thank you all for your reviews, I love them!**

**I have made a twitter account under the username Elohiniar to connect better with my guest readers who can't subscribe to my writing. So please follow me!**

**Lost Memories is five chapters longer :)...oops that was a rewrite**

**What's next?**

**Sota's Wedding. **I am really excited to write this one, but drawing a blank. I want requests. What do you think Wolf-demon wedding traditions would be? Lets veer away from traditional US weddings with the exchange of vows and rings etc...I would love to know what you would want as part of it, cause I need inspiration. Considering how much fighting there was in Instinct about where it should be and Sayako went into her first heat before the wedding, she's also going to be pregnant with baby Tatsuo. Inuyasha and Kagome are going to be grandparents!

Sayako may already be bound to Sota but I think it might be that he needs help returning it because of his weaker yoki haven't figured that part out yet or whether Kagome is going to want to add human traditions to the wedding hahaha. Maybe sess should send them to his family's villa? Seriously need ideas people, help me out. **Just remember I do not do mating marks, and tying their life-spans together.**

Once this is done as I have time and I really don't right now :(...taking two classes and my family life is making writing difficult, other drabbles are going to focus on what is left of the requests people have made for me to write.

At the moment I am triaging what I have time and inspiration to write because of my classes and other obligations. I will keep writing on drabbles as inspiration comes but all this was just build up for the Disease :)

**The Disease is up :)**

Please go read and review. It's going to be written in snippets or else the constant back and forth between POV's is going to get confusing.

**Finally Review responses:**

**If you are a guest reviewer, there is a box right below where you can add a name. Just make one up please so I can tell you apart easier please please please?**

**Guest#1 on Chapter 33: **Sesshomaru is not Lord of the West so no he cannot give up his title. Kensaku is Lord of the West and has a much larger army that Sesshomaru does so it would be suicide. He cannot live his life quietly as he is too powerful and as one of my readers told me, it would be completely OC for Sess to give up something he worked so hard for. He built his lands by his own blood, he isn't going to let them go. Inheritance is not the heart of the issue, its honor and something else you'll have to read the Disease for.

**Guest #2 on Chapter 33: **I so love your review! Yes his mother is all those things and I love your visceral reaction to the portrayal of her character! You'll have to read the Disease to see what is going to happen.

**Guest #3 on Chapter 33: **You would think it would have been easier for him to remain a Racist Asshole huh? But then you wouldn't have awesome stories to read that deviate from the same plotlines that have been told for the last 15 years. I'm not sure I agree with him being a spineless wimp though. His mother is more powerful than him. If you notice in Sesshomaru and the Underworld in FA, after his mother admitted to killing Rin he did not attack her. Whether it was out of respect or the fact that she could probably give him an ass kicking I have no idea.

**Guest #4 on Chapter 33: **In Instinct his mother made fun of him for not knowing the difference between the two powers. The power to bond and the power to create a child are 2 separate things that he has yet to learn to control. It's what she tried to get Hisato to control and may or may not have failed...

**Guest #2 I think on Chapter 32: **You must read Instinct! Your comment about cheating in the real world is on key. I am taking a class on Intimate Relationships and apparently about 27% of men and women believe that extramarital affairs are okay. One thing to keep in mind though is back in that time, polygamy was normal so it's not so far out of the realm of reality that it would happen. I'm sorry for what you experienced, betrayal and hurt are always the worst.

**Guest#5 on Chapter 33: **I changed the title to the Disease. I did all this hype that is what it would be called. The interaction between Future Sesshomaru and Rin is in the last chapter of Instinct.

**Guest #1 on Chapter 34: **Oh gosh I love your review! I mean I know, right? What was Tsukimaru thinking by taking away Rin's reincarnation and sending her away with Taka who isn't supposed to leave the castle.

**Guest #2 on Chapter 34: **Your review is exactly why I write Sesshomaru the way he is. He is always depicted those two ways which are completely OOC from the original. He is a very complex being and to be honest the story arcs that have been written, have been written 1000 times the exact same way. Mating marks, immortal, pure blooded children blah blah blah with little to no reason why he and Rin should be together other than his inner talking demon said so which is as ridiculous as him being with Natsuki. We'll see what happens to Tsukimaru in the Disease.

**Guest #3 on Chapter 34: **I feel bad for Taka too in this situation. She is young and rather naive and not sure what the right choice is. The Disease is up so please check it out.

**Guest #4 on Chapter 34: **Oh gawd I do not hate Rin. What I do love is a good story that is original and you can't do that if you copy what everyone else has done with mating marks, immortality, pure-blooded children all in a vain attempt to avoid putting conflict into a story which means for the 15 years thousands of stories that tell the same plot have been written over and over and over and over.

**Guest #5: **Thank you I am. I finally figured out how to put the two together and the Disease is up!

**Consistent guest:** Oh thank you for the compliment! I know right? I have to thank Animemadness101 for the inspiration behind Rin's reincarnations handicap and I wanted to make it difficult for the two to be together.

**Sessrinlover: #1 **So the well is a fickle being. In later chapters of the Disease you will find out why that wouldn't work. It was already acting up at the end of Instinct. And also...well you'll find out why Rin having Taiyomaru is so important too. **#2 **I'm not sure, but I could add in a one shot where Sesshomaru tells Tsukimaru what happened between Rin and Natsuki. It might be in the Disease at some point. **#3 **It always seems so simple doesn't it?


	40. Sota's Wedding

**Thank you all for the lovely reviews! I am issuing a review challenge for this chapter, 1. because I am a review whore and 2...this story slowed down a bit and this chapter took me forever. Think we can get 20 reviews for this chapter? I think the most I got was 15 for either Instinct/The Disease so please please please? Review, tell me your favorite part of the story!**

**This is for Esther247 who asked for a day in the life of the twins. I can't exactly write this 100% the way you want yet because Tsukimaru ages so slowly. He will look like a 2 year old until he is 20 and he is still about 6 months in this story so this is best I could do.**

**THE DISEASE WAS NOMINATED BEST ANGST ON TUMBLR'S FEUDAL CONNECTION YAY! PLEASE VOTE, JAN 29-FEB 15.**

**Guess who's one tumblr now? Me same username ya'll. Connect with me for updates.**

**Sota's Wedding**

**Yuki**

**Morning**

Grown-ups are strange people, that's all she can think while she observes the preparations. Chichiue will be back at any moment. He's at Soba-sama's castle in the sky which means that he is visiting her half-brother. He was supposed to be back before the sun set. "Yuki!" Rin called her.

"What?"

"Come help me," her mother instructed her.

"I don't want to," she stomped her foot, pouting as she trailed after her mother.

"Take the flowers and put them in the corners of the courtyard."

Yuki only rolled her eyes as she grabbed a few arrangements from the public dining hall and then out to the courtyard flopping them in the corners.

"Can you try to make them look nice?" Kagome asked her while picking up the arrangements and tying them to trellises.

"Why are you asking me if you want it to look nice?" Yuki licked her fangs as she ran away.

"Yuki!" Her mother shouted after her.

_No…no…no! I'm not decorating!_

"Stop," Katsumoto landed next to her. "Come on, back to the house."

"No!" She folded her arms over her chest, glaring at the black haired fiend in front of her.

"You're brothers are at the house so that is where you are staying," he said firmly gripping her shoulder.

"Let me go!" She tried to rip her arm away from him.

Katsumoto burst into laughter. "Is that the best you can do?" He yanked her into his chest and flew into the air taking her back home. "Now go be useful."

"Why don't you be useful!?" She stuck her tongue out at him.

"Yuki," Rin took her by the arm and brought her to the door. "I swear if you don't behave," she leaned over and whispered in Yuki's ear. "Your backside will be more sore than your face was when I lost my memories."

Yuki gasped appalled. "He told you about that?"

"Of course," her mother giggled. "Did you think he wouldn't tell me he had to slap you across the face?"

"You said he wasn't allowed to hit me!"

"That was before you turned into a brat," Akari said over Rin's shoulders. "Now you can help me set the tables. Take these plates."

"You're the one that's a servant!"

"Rin!" Kagome called. "What the hell did you do to my niece? It's not like Inuyasha is that well behaved, but jeez none of my kids act like this."

"Yes well none of your kids have Sesshomaru for a father. And we're hosting this wedding. What are you complaining about?" Ka-san asked.

"We would have hosted it. It's not my fault I was forced into this," Inuyasha carried a large stack of plates into the public dining room. "Don't you have servants who could do this?"

"Osuwari!" Kagome yelled over her shoulder as she opened the door.

"Jokes on you!" Inuyasha stuck his tongue out at Kagome. "I'm not wearing them anymore!"

"I knew I never should have taken them off," Kagome ran back to grab more cups from outside.

"I swear, chickens are more organized," Yuki muttered as she lifted a stack of plates and followed after everyone else.

**Harutoga**

**Evening**

He sat entranced as his father told him a bed-time story. This time they were telling the story of how he fought a group of snake demons the night that Sota was born. Chichiue had come to visit Ka-san when she was just a girl, but Ojisan had left by himself and Chichiue knew Ojisan would be dead if he didn't help. So he went after them. When he got there, the Monk and Inuyasha were surrounded and Chichiue used his Bakusaiga and the snakes were lit on fire. He burned them to death and their bodies were hacked into pieces, blood spurt from their mouths, and—"This is a bedtime story?" Ka-san leaned against the door.

"We were just getting to the best part!" Yuki sat in rapt attention holding Taiyomaru who had FINALLY stopped crying the second that Chichiue landed.

Ka-san knelt down on the bed, hugging Chichiue around the waist and kissed his cheek with a smile. "Death and gore? That's your bedtime story?"

"Glory and pride," Chichiue sat up straighter. "They should know of the might of their father."

"And their mother?"

"All you do is have babies," Harutoga said quickly. "Chichiue fights things."

"I fought an Ogre King!"

"Yeah but you would have lost if Natsuki didn't come," Yuki said.

"I fought snake demons before!"

"Chichiue saved you," Harutoga reminded her.

"I fought the Healer!"

"I softened him up," Yuki reminded her. "I stabbed him and pumped him full of Dokkasu a few times."

"Apparently, I can't do anything and you're the hero." Ka-san let go of Chichiue and even Harutoga saw the tears in her eyes. "I'll take the baby." She bent over to take his baby brother but even that made him start screaming and she flopped the baby back in Chichiue's arms and left the room.

"You made her sad," Chichiue said firmly bouncing the baby in his lap. "Ka-san is a warrior."

"But you only ever talk about yourself," Harutoga told him.

"Ka-san has slain many ogres on her own. The first time I saw it, she was sixteen. Did I tell you this story?"

"No!" Yuki and Harutoga answered at the same time.

"She was in the forest with her friend," and he grimaced when he said the word _friend _and Harutoga wondered why. "They were near Kaede's village walking home. She had your cousins with her. This was before Mayumi was born. They were very young and her friend had his nieces and nephews. An ogre came from the bushes and attacked her. He said he would eat her to make Chichiue suffer. She jumped into the air, like a falcon, onto his shoulders. She threw a knife into his neck first, then slid down his back using the katana that I gave her. He fell to his death. That is the power of your Ka-san. Now into bed, the wedding is early in the afternoon and you need to sleep."

"How come she doesn't do that anymore?" Harutoga asked as he made himself a nest in Yuki's bed.

"Because she's weak after having babies duh! Ouch!" Yuki rubbed her forehead and snarled at her father.

He had flicked her in the head for her insolence. "Because she cares for you and this village. When you lived by the ocean, who killed the ogres?"

"Ka-san," they said together.

"Who made jewelry to pay for your clothes?"

"Ka-san."

"Who killed the Healer?"

"Ka-san."

"Is she weak?"

"No," they said together. "Just because she is human, doesn't mean she is less than this Sesshomaru. Now go to sleep." He kissed their brows and left the room.

**Rin**

**Early Morning**

She fell asleep before he came to bed the night before. Something about feeling like she could do nothing right was eating at her as she finished the rest of the preparations. As she woke she felt herself wrapped in arms and warm breath puffing next to her neck. She sat up, her red yukata half falling off her shoulders as she did. She wiggled out of his arms to stare at him and leaned on one hand to trace the markings on his face before leaning over and kissing his sleeping lips. "I chose this didn't I?" She said it quietly, more to herself than to him as she checked on the sleeping baby in the basket next to her.

"Chose what?" his voice came from behind her.

"I woke you, I'm sorry." She slid her yukata off her shoulders baring her naked body to him, while she rummaged for clothing.

"Such a pleasant sight to wake up to," he said not getting up. "Come back to bed."

"There's too much to do, that is if I am of use to anyone for anything." Her back was turned and she was glad he couldn't see the tears welling in her eyes.

"Should I say what I can smell, and feel my heart? Come to bed. You have many uses."

"A vessel for children? For pleasure?"

Her hand was grasped and she was tugged back onto the futon and into the arms of her lover. He wrapped one arm around her waist and leg around her ankles. "We were friends before we were lovers and before that I cared for you as a father does a daughter. I remember when you lost a tooth do you remember?"

"I was scared."

"You told me that your first tooth hurt when it came out. One of the village children had hit you in the face with a stone."

"And you wiggled the tooth until it came out," she chuckled. "I remember. How is this making me feel more useful?"

"You warmed my heart with your trust. You gave me my strength. Did I tell you the first time Naraku kidnapped you, I nearly died?"

"No," she said quietly.

"He trapped me in his body in an attempt to absorb me, to fuel his body. For a moment inside, I thought does it matter? But then I thought of the little girl who was waiting for me and again with Magatsuhi. I was injured and more than anything in that moment, I wanted something to destroy Naraku, to protect you, my heart. Bakusaiga was made from my love for you. I am not the hero without you. I am nothing without you."

She smiled listening to him speak.

"You are powerful, driven, beautiful. They will know the strength of their mother."

"When all you tell them stories of is yourself and your father?"

"Last night, I told them of the day you slew an ogre when you were sixteen. Tonight, I will tell them of the twelve year old girl who killed two demons for the first time. After the wedding you will tell me more, of the time when you trained as a child and hid it from me." He warmed her cheek with his lips. "They will hear of your battle against Touma, how your birthed Yuki in a cave by yourself and all the exploits of your life."

She chuckled and wiped her eyes. "I shouldn't doubt you."

"What did you choose?"

"Life next to a dai-yokai. You will always outshine me."

"I am the moon," he touched his forehead, fingers running over the crescent moon. "I reflect the light of the sun. You are my sun. We will make love before you leave this room." He rolled her naked to straddle his lap, it was only as he slid into her that she realized he was naked too.

She grit her teeth, taking him in and wiggling to find comfort. "I wasn't ready yet," she panted.

A smirk creased his features as he held her chin and took in her lips. "Then let me help you."

**Taisho**

**Mid-morning**

No one tells you how to say goodbye to a brother. They decided together to come after helping Sesshomaru with the Healer fiasco and because their mother would return to her time and Sota was a freakshow who would need special permission to keep his head covered while Taisho always felt like an awkward second wheel to his smoother older brother. Sota had everything, the looks, the wiggly ears, blades of blood and was even taller and more youthful because his yoki was more powerful. But, they had bonded serving their uncle together and then Sota found Sayako and ever since she went into heat the month before he had barely seen his brother. Now they would be parted, for how long he didn't know.

"Stop looking so sour," Sota told him as he dressed in a fine silken black Kimono with dragons embroidered in gold. His hikama contrasted in pristine white as he tied his obi and threaded his katana through it.

"You're getting married. You're sixteen!"

"So?" Sota sat down on a wooden bench in their room that was western style rather than Eastern. "What's wrong Taisho?"

"You're leaving me. It's always been you and me and now you're going." The black haired brother sat on the bench. "What am I going to do here now?"

"Stay? Take care of the barrier. Keep Obasan from killing Ojisama," Sota chuckled at his joke and slapped a hand against Taisho's back. "We knew it would happen one day. Besides you'll find someone to love."

"I hope she's human. How is your back?"

Sota reached over his shoulder laughing. "It finally healed."

"Did you bond her?"

"No, she did me but I couldn't. She pummeled me, I had to hold her down which wasn't easy because she is so much stronger than I am. Can you imagine? Being married to a being so much stronger than you?"

"You mean like To-san and Ka-san?"

"Yeah but at least To-san is stronger than Ka-san. It's odd," he shook his shoulders nervously. "I'll bond her tonight. Ojisama will help me."

"Isn't supposed to happen during?" Taisho nervously asked.

He nodded. "He won't be in the room, but I need him to thread some of his yoki into the sword for me to draw on. We knew it might happen that on my own, I don't have enough. So if I can use the katana to strengthen what I have, we can do it."

"Either way, I'll miss you."

"She's pregnant," Sota told him standing up. "We don't know how long it will be. More than three months, less than nine."

"Really? I'm going to be an Uncle?" Taisho hugged his brother. "That's amazing!"

**Kagome**

**Afternoon**

There are no words that could have prepared her for this day. Her son is sixteen and getting married. It would be a scandal on the other side of the well but here it's considered normal. "Just breathe," Sango encouraged her as Sota and Sayako paced up the trail of flowers that had been laid for them. They would get married under a canopy of flowers, while the hot summer sun traces orange silhouettes on their bodies. Sayako wore a white kimono despite the loss of her virginity. "Just breathe."

Kagome wrapped her arms around Inuyasha's stomach and he smiled at her proudly. Their lips met briefly as the young couple was led to the canopy. Koga came forward first to deliver a speech. It spoke of the spiritual bond that transcends time and space. He wound a red string around their wrists, saying that it represented an eternal thread. They would be together in this life and the next. Her hanyou lover glanced down at her and tore a thread from his clothes, wrapping it around her wrists and whispered in her ear, "for always."

She couldn't hold back the tears, her baby was getting married and just before the procession started Taisho let the secret out that Sayako was pregnant and she would soon become a grandmother in her thirties, she laughed internally. Another scandal if it were to happen in her time. Sesshomaru stepped forward first to bless their union, then Inuyasha and then the children were encouraged to throw rice and candies at the couple to bless them with many sweet years just before the villagers who could play instruments began a sensuously slow song that Kagome had no idea what to do with.

Sango flushed watching some of the demoness drag their partners into a circle around a lit pyre and the men fall to one knee. "What are they doing?"

"I want to do that," Miroku licked his lips.

"You'd do anything," Sango said flatly.

"As long as it was you," he said cheerfully.

The women began swaying their hips while pointing at their lovers.

"It's a dance," Rin ran over and grabbed Kagome and Sango by the wrists. "It's a lovers seduction. The female draws the male in."

"I don't know this dance!" Kagome protested.

"Neither do I. It's a wolf demon dance, but I'm not missing my chance to make him," she pointed at Sesshomaru, "dance with me. Come on!"

Kagome watched as Rin grabbed Sesshomaru wrist and led him into the circle. He lowered himself onto one knee with a fire in his eyes that made Kagome blush, especially when Rin swayed her hips and jiggled her belly at him, just before she slid one leg over his shoulder, making her kimono bare her legs and he rubbed her hips sensuously for everyone to see. "Shall we?" Inuyasha asked red cheeked.

_Why not? _

She led him into the circle. The women danced in a round, skipping and flipping their hips until they came to their partners. Kagome giggled as she swung her hair into his face and then ground herself against him, starting by holding his shoulders and rotating her hips against his face. It seemed entirely immodest to dance like this where others could see, but Koga's nose was buried in Ayame's crotch, Sesshomaru was holding Rin's butt in his hands while she bent backwards and rocked her hips into his face. Sango held Miroku's hands as they wandered up her sides and she ran her butt up against his face and he nuzzled the cheeks warmly. No one was watching her, so she shimmied herself down until her legs were wrapped around him. The dance alone was making a heat rise in her center and she wanted him. She turned around as he stood and rolled her shoulders into his chest as his hands explored. They dipped down and lifted the fabric of her emerald green kimono to bare her legs. He knelt back down following the other men and then she felt his hands massaging the inside of her thighs. She gasped in surprise at how warm it made her feel and how badly she wanted to continue this naked, until she saw Rin backing away from Sesshomaru and untying her obi, letting her outer layer fall to the ground. Underneath she wore only a thin layer that left very little to the imagination. Sayako had done the same, so did Ayame until they were hardly clad. Sango flushed and removed her outer layers. "Take it off," Inuyasha stood up with the men, it seemed their only job was to stand and kneel and paw at their females.

Sesshomaru now had his nose firmly pressed into Rin's crotch and Kagome wondered what exactly they were doing but shook herself free. "I don't have anything on under it." She shook her butt in his face, back and forth. "Just underwear."

"That's a problem," he said tugging on the string of her thong. "I guess I need to take you somewhere private then."

"Can we? Is it bad form."

"I don't think so?" Inuyasha pointed at Rin who seemed to be riding out an orgasm. Kagome was more than glad that Rin's yukata was covering whatever it was that Sesshomaru was doing to her, until she noticed that many of the demonesses were moaning and gyrating against their lovers. "Let's go!" He snatched her around the waist and ran with her back to their room.

**Inuyasha**

**Late Afternoon**

"Fuck Kagome," Inuyasha flopped backwards on the bed after she had rode him until he exploded inside of her. "Wow…we should marry all our kids off to wolf demons."

Kagome climbed off him and passed him a towel. They were in the private family guest rooms. _"Oh…ah! Sota! Yes! Right there!" _

Inuyasha's ears drooped slightly. "I'm not sure I want to hear that."

Kagome turned bright red. _"Harder, oh fuck me harder! Yes! Oh I'm going to! SSSSSSOOOOOOOTTTTAAA!" _

"No, I'm not so sure I want to hear that either." She scrambled to find her clothing and flew into them like she was being chased by something darker than Naraku.

Inuyasha watched with a solid and satisfied smirk as he did the same. They ran out of the hallway just as it was obvious that Sayako came with a horrendous howl that rattled the walls and Sota roaring so loud that they picked up speed. "Okay I know our son is having sex, I definitely don't want to hear him having sex," Kagome said to him.

"Koga said when they did it the first time, that he nearly caused an avalanche. She screamed that loud," Inuyasha laughed.

Now that the sensuous dance was over a new, jollier tune floated into the field of daisies and around the pyre the children danced. A smile crossed his lips as he watched Mayumi and Yuki hold hands. Next to them Taisho held Taiyomaru in one hand and Harutoga's hand in the other. Izayoi joined in with the girls and it didn't take long for Sesshomaru to join next to his brother watching them, holding his white haired child in his hands. "You brought him to my son's wedding?"

"Tsukimaru is my son. Why should he not come to his cousin's wedding? His mother is in the castle." Tsukimaru sucked happily on his father's thumb, half gumming it.

"He still looks like a newborn. Can I hold him?" Inuyasha asked holding out his arms.

"You want to hold the son who tore my house apart?" He shrugged and passed his son to his brother.

"It wasn't his fault," Inuyasha said as he made silly faces, blowing raspberries at the baby to get him to smile. He was rejected when Tsukimaru frowned and immediately broke into hysterical screams. He threw the baby back at his father. "Apparently he doesn't like me."

"I would also dislike being slobbered on by someone like you," Sesshomaru said wryly, but then he exhaled heavily. "It's good to see our children celebrating together."

"Almost like the past never happened. Do you worry about it with Tsukimaru and your hanyou children?"

"Often." They found a grassy area to sit together. "I want them to be friends, allies, not enemies. Not like you and I."

"Would it have been different if Oyaji had said why he did what he did with the swords?" He had always wondered about that. Would their lives have been different, hatred avoided?

"It couldn't be taught with words. It had to be as it was. But this one," he said nuzzling his son's nose, "will be outnumbered by the other three and I do not wish him to ever have to face Yuki's temper. She will kill him. It will take centuries for him to be stronger than them and they are inseparable. He threatens one of them, he will face all of them."

"I hope I live long enough to see it. I never thought you would father a hanyou."

"Neither did I."

"It never bothers you?" The scars of the past ran deep and he could see his brother eying him as they sat together.

"They were made in love. The past is the past Inuyasha. You are my brother, annoying as you are. You have cared for my family many times in the past. Rin would not be alive without you," and then he winced and Sesshomaru said so quietly, it was almost missed, "I am sorry for the pain I caused you before, it was childish and immature."

"Thanks," he said quietly. "It was stupid wasn't it? The way we fought?"

"A waste of energy, I should have just killed you," he rose from his place and brought the baby to Rin. "He's hungry, feed him."

**Sesshomaru**

**Middle of the Night**

The celebration has been long and the middle of the night approached. Before he returned home, he had gone to get demon shochu. It was quadruple the strength of regular sake and even he was feeling its affects. The males were gathered in the public dining halls together singing at the top of their lungs. He slammed his hand down on the table, picking up another glass of sake and downing it. He closed his eyes and opened them to find two Rins standing in front of him. He belched and covered his mouth, trying to recover his dignity and said, "Rin who is your beautiful sister?"

"I think you've had enough."

"I've never had enough. Nring her to bed," he giggled joining a chorus of laughter.

"Okay, that's enough come on," she bent down enough to get an arm around his waist.

"Why doesn't she help you carry this Sesshomaru to bed?"

"You're seeing double," she rolled her eyes and shook her head. "My love, you've had too much to drink."

He leaned on her as he walked, his feet moving sloppily as he did. "The night is young my heart, we should celebrate."

"We will," she assured him as he carried her.

"You're lying," he said smelling her neck and licking her skin. "Where did your sister go?"

"She went home. She has a husband and a family and many children."

"I will kill him. She will be mine," he tripped and landed against the wall. "All the beautiful women will be mine! We will fuck, until you cannot walk."

"You already cannot walk!" she fumed at him with her hands on her hips. They had made it as far as the private corridor with Rin glaring at him. "Come on."

"I'm thirsty," he stalked her like a dog, wrapping his arms around her waist and squeezing her ass.

She squeaked in protest, music to his ears. "Those are not drinks!" She slapped his hands off her breasts. "Sesshomaru, get into bed."

"Only if you come too," he burst into laughter leaning on her as she led him into bed. "Let me touch your breasts, they're so beautiful."

"I'm going to remind you of this in the morning." She elbowed his stomach and opened the door their room. He flopped onto the bed, taking her with him, until she straddled his chest. "What do you think you are doing?"

"You? I'm hungry," he said gleefully, shimmying himself down until he could feel the heat of her slit against his lips. "I will eat." He parted her petals, bearing her heat.

"That's not food!" she protested trying to get up but even drunk he was stronger than she was. He held her hips in place and reveled in the gasp he brought from her lips. "My love," she whispered in his ear. "Oh I like that."

"You love this," he said sensuously sucking on her bud that was smashed into his face. He licked it gratefully, running his tongue up her heat then down. He had made her come so hard during that dance she dripped down his elbow, now he was going to enjoy this. He yanked her kimono off her shoulders, freed her hair from the combs she was wearing and inserted his tongue deep into her crotch, licking her walls until she was gasping and leaning over him. "Even drunk, I pleasure you."

"It's so good," she said gripping the pillows in front of her.

He inserted his fingers and pumped her core, licking, sucking, swirling with his tongue while she rocked her hips against his face. He drank her taste, ate her essence until she was moaning and then he felt the familiar rush of muscles vibrating against his nose. She lowered herself down laughing and kissed his lips, tasting of the moisture of her opening and of her own saliva. "You look satisfied."

"Very, now it's my turn," he inclined his head, removing his clothing, although his hands fumbled on his obi and his thumbs felt fat. She helped him with a smile and as she removed his hikama she said quietly. "We have a problem my love."

"What?" He sat up stroking her back.

She twirled his extremely flaccid cock in her fingers with pursed lips and small snorts of laughter escaping her lips. "You seemed to be having a little problem."

"There is nothing little about this Sesshomaru," he glared at the offending appendage.

"Well, I will try my best, but I think you may be too drunk."

"Impossible," he hiccupped, "my yoki powers my penis. It will not be defeated by sake. Up!" he commanded it.

"I don't think that's how it works."

"You will put it in your mouth," he flopped backwards. "That will work."

He felt her hot mouth cover him, she sucked and licked and after a minute she sat back laughing, covering her exquisitely beautiful mouth. "I think it's broken," she broke into raucous laughter as she spoke.

He sat up and touched himself in dismay, "pathetic thing." It was soggy from her saliva, flat and so floppy it was embarrassing. "You will tell no one of this."

"Your secret is safe with me," Rin said laying down against his chest. "Now go to sleep."

"When did your sister get here?" He rubbed his eyes, seeing two beautiful dark haired women against his chest before the world went black.

**Please review! What was your favorite part? My husband was rolling last night reading drunk Sesshomaru. **

**WHY NAG ABOUT REVIEWS? I GOT ANOTHER ONE OF THOSE "WHY DON'T YOU HAVE MORE REVIEWS?" QUESTIONS ON KISS OF FATE WHICH I AM COAUTHORING WITH KIMMIGIRL9. I COULD EXPLAIN, I COULD TALK ABOUT WHY THE SESS/RIN IS DYING BUT REALLY I JUST WANT PEOPLE TO REVIEW TO SHOW THEIR SUPPORT, LOVE AND APPRECIATION FOR THE WRITING THAT THE ARTISTS DO ON THIS SITE. #REVIEWOTUION PEOPLE. IF WE WANT MORE SESS/RIN STORIES AND TO BRING THEM BACK AS A COUPLE YOU HAVE TO START LEAVING MORE REVIEWS. SO YOU READING THIS, NOT LEAVING A REVIEW? YEAH WRITE ONE, TAKES LIKE FIVE MINUTES OF THE SEVERAL HOURS IT TOOK ME TO WRITE THE WEDDING.**

**Special thanks to Nighbird755...we wrote a drunk sess scene together, rather role played it and I had so much fun making him drunk I wanted to do it again. **

**Esther247: **I am for sure still taking requests! I just don't have as much time to drabble right now. Darn university classes!


	41. Author's Warning

**Just a fair warning to all you guest reviewers who don't have an account...if you can't get past the Instinct plotline, I am no longer going to approve your reviews. They are getting old and tired. I get it, you don't like, but yet you keep coming back and reading more...so please go find other stories to hate on because it's not welcome here.**

**These drabbles will continue on with or without your support because at the end of the day I write to please myself :) and your reviews have nothing to do with the current chapter posted. **

**Thank you!**

**Elohiniar**


	42. The Children Lead the Way

**Well...it's been a while since I wrote a drabble.**

**To all who asked, yes I do still take requests! I'm a little more strapped for time, so it will take much time for me to actually get to them. I'm sorry... :(...I'm trying to focus on Fire and Ice and the Disease mostly right now besides beta work.**

**Just a fair warning, I am not going to respond to whiny reviews below. I don't have energy for whiners. All you people that were posting under anonymous accounts, you can review but no one will see it, because I won't approve it. This is a reminder to move the fuck on and enjoy the other 6,000 sessrin stories on this site. Oh and if you flame under real accounts, I'll block you...so either way you lose. **

**This section is inspired by 2 things. Having a challenging kid and Fire and Ice being nominated best angst on tumblr. I admit my failure if someone nominated my fluff story as best angst. But if you think that was angst...well read this...**

**The Children Lead the Way**

For the most part, life has returned to normal. After Ka-san and Chichiue returned from seclusion, whatever that meant, they did their best to live life as it had been before Natsuki. Chichiue wakes them early every morning for their lessons. Lessons that begin with breakfast with her mother who nurses the baby and eats at the same time. Every so often Chichiue pinches her bare side and Ka-san throws a piece of fruit at his face in retaliation.

He's smiling again. It took their week away for Chichiue to remember to smile and for the lines on his face to disappear. But while her parents lives have gone back to normal, Yuki's hasn't. "Can I be excused?" she asks, already standing.

"You didn't eat." Ka-san points at her plate.

"I'm not hungry," she lies. She is, but her tummy aches every time she tries to eat. It knots around her middle, making bile rise in her throat. Lying doesn't work on Chichiue. He raises an eyebrow at Yuki and points to her chair. To make them happy, she sits down and pokes her food with a fork, forcing a few bites of raw meat and fruit down.

Chichiue is leaving tomorrow for a week. The borders are stable, the ogres no longer mass against the Southern Border. The Eastern allies made peace with their enemies, which means more peace for Chichiue as he no longer has to aid Ichiro in battles that he had in the past. Their lands are quiet and all that's left is for Ka-san to begin the harvest that will last them through the winter. "Yuki, after your lessons with Jaken I want you to help in the garden."

The world spins as she rolls her eyes. "Do I have to?"

"What was that?" her father's voice comes out coarsely, making her jump.

"Yes Ka-san." She puts on her most innocent face and lying smile. Stupid grownups, always making her do things she doesn't want.

"One day, you'll be glad I taught you how to tend the gardens," proudly Ka-san speaks.

_Yeah right, _she thinks to herself. "Can I be excused now?"

Chichiue nods his head, this time giving her permission to leave. Her tummy aches again. Her hands are clammy. It's like the walls are closing in on her. She runs out of the dining room, leaving her parents behind and fleeing for the nearest exit. She slams the door behind her and runs as fast as she can. Over the large rock that's just outside the door, into the forest where the pine nettles used to sting her feet. Swinging from branch to branch, she flings her body over and over again until her arms start burning and she can't catch her breath. The last branch closest to the river is slippery. The second her palm hits the slimy wood, it slips. She loses her grip and falls towards the forest floor.

Curling in a ball, she prepares herself for the impact, the jagged rocks of the river, the splashing water and the pain.

It never comes. A striped hand wraps around her waist and flies her back to the river bank. Chichiue's mad at her. She can see it in his eyes. She isn't supposed to leave the house without dogface, but she left him behind. He raises an eyebrow and points towards the house. She doesn't want to listen but she already knows resistance is futile.

He takes her into the garden where Harutoga already waits, bare from the waist up. Chichiue follows suit, hanging his own on the sakura tree. Chichiue teaches them about breathing and stances and how to stand strong. He takes them into the forest to play hide and seek, tag and then begins a new game of how to evade an enemy you can't escape. Yuki learns to climb trees faster, to use branches and boulders as barriers. But all it does is make her mind go back _there. _To the forest, to Hideyoshi chasing them, to feel of his warm blood, dripping down her hands after she slashed his throat open.

She twists around a boulder, and leaps into a tree. When Chichiue's clawed hand comes flying at her she shrieks, "STOP!" Slipping and falling, she hits two branches, crashing into her ribs, sending shockwaves of pain before her father catches her around her waist. "Let me go!" She slashes at his face.

His grip is like iron. "Stop Yuki."

"NO NO NO!" She struggles. She bites his arm. She slashes his wrist. She sprays him with dokkasu. The skies fill with her cries. "Let me go!" she pleads, sobbing and crying in his arms. She kicks until she has no strength left. Feeling faint, her stomach empties itself, making her ribs hurt that much more, but Chichiue doesn't let go. He pats her back and rubs her shoulders.

"Shh, my little one. Quiet."

"What's wrong with her?" Harutoga asks, but Yuki can hardly hear him.

"Shh." She feels his wind against her ears and his chest against her back.

She cries until she can't anymore, until the world is dark and things become garbled.

When night falls, the air begins to change. It smells like rains even though the skies are clear and an uneasiness settles in the air, like something is about to change but she doesn't know what. She wakes to the smell of herbs on her chest and the whispering of grownups in the hall. She sneaks forward, eavesdropping on their conversation. "Is she okay?" Ka-san asks Nobuatsu.

"She shows no sign of illness," the lanky horse demon answers. "If she develops a fever, send for me."

All the while Chichiue is quiet by the wall. He and Ka-san go into their room and the conversation continues. "Something's wrong," Ka-san says, making Yuki feel guilty for worrying her.

"She did not eat this morning," Chichiue adds.

"She hasn't been eating most morning since we returned," the sound of Ka-san flopping against the futon reverberates off the walls. "She barely smiled at the wedding."

"Tired my heart?"

Yuki presses her head against the turquoise door of her room to hear better.

"I'm so worried. Something's wrong with Yuki. She hasn't been right since we returned. She killed, Sesshomaru and she's only nine years old."

_Something's wrong with me?_

"She will get past it," Chichiue says. "Although," he adds, his voice becoming quieter, "she is younger than I, when I killed for the first time. But not that much younger than you were."

"That was different. Those youkai did not have human form. I was protecting my village—"

"She was protecting her brothers."

"It's not the same my love and you know it. I don't want you to go tomorrow. Something feels wrong."

On cue the skies flash with lightning, the clouds come and the rains begin. They beat on the ground, flooding the garden, making streams. Yuki runs to her outside door and pushes rags and towels against the crack to prevent water from entering, then goes back to the door to listen but all is quiet.

Rin wakes with a start. Her lover is absent. Setting palms against the ground, she feels the vibrations, the movements of the ground beneath them. At first it's just a tremor, soft rumbles that make the bed feel like it's swimming. It lasts for all of a few minutes and then stops.

But then, it starts again. A rumble. A crack. The ground vibrates so hard she can't stand up. She reaches for Taiyomaru, sleeping in his basket and runs for the children's room. They have to get out of the house. It happened once before that the beams cracked under the pressure of one of the earthquakes that often shake Japan.

Gathering her baby in a bundle of blankets, she reaches for the turquoise door, only for the red one to open. Her lover comes through and pushes her out the door into the garden. "Go to the river!"

It happens too quickly, all of it. The ground sways again, knocking her feet out from underneath her. She lands on her side, cradling Taiyomaru, taking the blow. The wind flies out of her mouth. The branches of the trees in the garden sway, one collapses. A pine's roots fail and the entire thing comes crashing down only inches from where she is laying. Rolling over, she leaps out of the way, then jumps over a log, heading for the river, trying to avoid the forest. It comes crashing down around her. Pines, leaves, branches, stone.

Behind her she hears a crack and then the rumble of breaking stone. The last thing she sees is the roof collapsing to rubble before she crests over a hill, fleeing for the river. "Sesshomaru!"

He was in his study reading when the tremors began. They tickled his toes at first, swaying them back and forth like a hammock, then stopped. In 900 years, he had experienced many earthquakes. One he had been in a cave playing with other boys when it collapsed and his mother and father rescued him.

But as the earth shook, tremored and then cracked beneath his feet, he rushed first for his bedroom, to the one most vulnerable, Taiyomaru. He picked both Rin and the baby up, urging them out of the home to the river, their safe place. He would meet them there.

The earth becomes furious, striking out at him before he can make it to the children's room. He stepped over jagged rocks shooting up from the floor below. He rips their door off the hinges just in time to see only Harutoga scuffling his way to the outer door. The children had been taught since they could talk and walk to leave the house by the nearest exit if it were ever attacked, on fire or when the ground moves. "Chichiue help!" the boys screams. He falls, ripping a hole in his side.

Sesshomaru dashes for his son just as the main support beams above crack. There's no time to think, to leave the room, only to act. The beam is twice as thick as he is, and double his length.

Harutoga screams, covering his head with his hands.

Sesshomaru dives on top of his son, taking the blow. The beam slams into his back, shattering his spine, making him growl in pain and rage. It slides down his back, tearing his skin and lands on his left ankle severing the foot, but he forces his back to stay arched to protect Harutoga from the falling debris. "Yuki!" Sesshomaru sniffs desperately, trying to find his daughter, but her scent is absent.

Rin slips on a log, falling and twisting her ankle. "Dammit!" She forces herself up. The rain is still pouring, making escape from the rumbling earth impossible.

"Rin-sama!" she hears Hisato's voice, just before he lands next to her. He catches her by the elbow just as the tremor hits the ground. Grabbing her around the waist, he flies her into the air, where neither of them can suffer the ill effects of the shaking earth.

"The house!" Rin calls, watching Hisato's gaze shift. "Sesshomaru was in there."

Hisato nods, waiting for the ground to stop moving. When it does he lands next to the house, in the garden, amongst the rubble. "Kami," he mutters and moves towards the large stones that have fallen. "He's in there. I smell his blood!"

"Sesshomaru!" Rin yells, running for the stones, throwing them off as quickly as she can. "Sesshomaru! Hisato get Nobuatsu and some of the other men from the village. Tell Taisho to help Takeshi and the others to raise tents to treat the wounded in front of the house. My children?"

Hisato sniffs again, moving closer to the stones, leaning over them. "Harutoga is inside, but I can't smell Yuki."

"Yuki!" Rin howls into the air, then throws herself into digging her lover out of the rubble. "Is she masking?"

"I don't think so. It's the rain," Hisato joins her.

"I told you to go."

"You can't move this yourself!"

"Please Hisato? The villagers rely on me to care for them. Get your brother and Katsumoto to help me. Kami, Yuki." She pushes the tears back, now is not the time for tears.

Yuki's by the river when she hears the wind call her name. She had left hours earlier when everyone thought she was sleeping, but then the earth began to shake around her. She dodged trees, rocks and falling limbs, and then hung onto the trunk of a strong oak. The river below was angry, sloshing water onto the sides, swelling and spilling.

She cries first for her mother, then for her father and then for dogface, because she thinks this time, her luck really has run out.

"Yuki!" she hears her name again. This time, coming from a younger male voice. "Yuki where are you!?"

"Katsumoto!" she cries, hugging the trunk of the tree, digging her claws in so deep she gets splinters.

"Here little one! I can't smell you. Where are you?"

"In a big oak tree! Hurry! I'm going to fall!" The rains are making it difficult to hold on. Water slithers down the sap soaked trunk. "Please Katsumoto!"

"I'm coming!" She feels the rush of his yoki, the wind of his speed and then arms gather her against a warm chest. The rain is cold. She shivers against him, hugging his neck. "It's okay. I have you now. When are you going to stop running off?"

"I didn't mean to. I couldn't sleep."

"Again?"

"Katsumoto! The house has fallen!" Hisato hovers just above the younger dog demon. "You have Yuki?"

"Yes, Cousin. I have her," Katsumoto shouts through the storm.

"Bring her back to the manor. Sesshomaru-sama was buried in the debris."

"Chichiue?" Yuki whimpers. _This is all my fault…there's something wrong with me._

Sesshomaru pants against the weight on his back and the pain pulsing through his body. There are no words to describe what a severed limb feels like, or how dizzy and near fainting he is. But if he moves, the cave of fallen stones around them will fall, burying his son. "Harutoga, wake up." He grunts, feeling a flash of pain fly up his spine. His leg is numb. He's sinking in stone and his own blood. "Wake up!" he shouts firmly, feeling guilt for yelling at the boy.

"Chichiue?" Harutoga croaks. His son has a deep gash in his belly and only lives because of his demon blood.

_"__Sesshomaru!" _he hears her from the other side of the stone. _"My love, answer me!"_

"Here!" he calls as loud as he can, succumbing to the pain. He loses several inches, sending rocks flying down around him. He sends his whip flying around his back, severing the beam into two, but the larger portion only falls heavier onto his back.

_"__We're coming for you!"_

"No! The foundation isn't stable!" He pants, trying to catch his breath. "Harutoga is hurt!"

He has to get the beam off his back, reattach his foot and somehow move his son. He closes his eyes, drawing on his yoki, but he's already lost too much blood to transform, too much to heal. "My son, wake up."

Harutoga finally stirs more. "My belly hurts, Chichiue."

"Shh." Sesshomaru's chest touches Harutoga's shoulder. "Stay beneath me. Do not move."

"Chichiue your foot!" Harutoga cries out.

"It's fine. Listen to me, you must stay beneath me, until a safe passage is made to get you out."

"Yes, Chichiue," he whispers, hugging himself.

Rin stops pulling stones off long enough to hug Yuki when Katsumoto lands. "We have to get him out. He sounds weak," Rin whispers, hoping her lover won't hear.

"As you wish," Katsumoto intones gravely and begins pulling rocks and stones out of the pile.

"I smell his blood!" Yuki screams and runs for the rocks, helping to clear a path.

Katsumoto goes to lift a large rock, the second he does, the rubble shifts and Sesshomaru howls from the inside, "STOP! It's going to fall!"

"Stop!" Rin commands.

Katsumoto backs away. "What are we going to do? If we shift too much the whole thing will fall."

Rin paces. They are surrounded by rains, by a night so dark it's hard to see. "We need light…Katsumoto, get Akari and Hineko. Sesshomaru are you okay?" She leans against some smaller stones.

She hears coughing from the inside of the cave. _"My heart," _his tone is pain filled and desperate. _"The inside must be stabilized first!"_

"The builders," Rin nods, taking in her lovers words. "How can we get anyone in there."

"We find a hole big enough for someone to get through," Hineko, Akari's orange haired husband says as he lands with the hanyou fire cat next to him. He raises two clawed hands, blazing fire. Akari follows.

Rin holds Yuki around the shoulders with one hand, and with the other tries to silence Taiyomaru. The babies sobs from the cold and from the stress he feels radiating off his mother.

Katsumoto, Sato and Hisato land, along with Taisho and Nobuatsu. "Is he alive?" Nobuatsu asks, peeling off a bag full of herbs.

"He's alive," Rin answers. "He's trapped," her voice finally breaks, giving in to worry.

"We'll get him out," Nobuatsu says confidently.

Sesshomaru shifts, trying to escape the pain in his back, to move away from the flinching nerves. "Harutoga," he whispers again, trying to keep his son awake.

"Chichiue, are we going to die?" The little boy grips his belly. It oozes blood.

"No. Take some of my blood and put it on your injury."

"From where? If I go to your ankle, I won't be underneath you?"

"Cut my chest."

"Chichiue?"

"Do it." His muscles tremble beneath the beam.

Harutoga lifts an unsure claw and slices into his father's chest, spreading the blood against the long cut along his belly. "It stings."

"I'm sorry, little one." He would kiss the child's forehead if he could reach it, but all his efforts are in keeping the rest of the rubble from collapsing on top of them. He was meant to die in battle, not under stone and rock.

Suddenly, from the corner of his eye, he sees orange flames going back and forth. "Hineko!" he calls when he can see it again.

The light stops, then he sees a hand several meters away from where he lies. _"Rin-sama, I can see him, just barely. There's an opening!"_

"Where?" Rin runs forward. Taisho and Sato have raised tents to block the rain and stop it from entering the ruins of what was once her room.

"Here," Hineko points through the rubble.

Rin looks into the hole but can't see anything. She shakes her head.

"Trust my youkai eyes, he's there. He's struggling. Whatever we do it, must be fast." Hineko back raises the flames. "Sesshomaru-sama! Can you see me?"

"_Yes_."

"The opening isn't large enough for an adult." Hineko starts pacing back and forth.

Hisato and Sato come to examine the shaft and carefully begin pulling stones out of the way to widen it. They reach in several feet, but the rocks start shifting again. _"Stop!" _Sesshomaru calls again. At this rate, they are going to send the rocks crashing down on his head.

"What are we going to do?" Sato glances at Rin and then his brother.

"The builders, Rin says. We need Usagi and Daisuke."

"But they can't fit through this hole. The light Hineko, higher." Hisato lifts the fire cat's hands until he can make out more of the tunnel. "It gets wider at the end, but if we shift too much rubble, it will come down on him and Harutoga. An adult can't fit in there."

"Taisho?" Rin eyes her nephew. The boy is tall and lanky still, only fourteen with a slender body.

"It's too risky. We need someone smaller," Sato eyes Yuki.

"No…" Rin shakes her head. "No, it could collapse with her in there."

_"__Send her!" _Sesshomaru calls from inside the hole. _"Harutoga is getting weaker!"_

Rin bites her bottom lip and nods her head. "Yuki, Chichiue needs you. Akari take the baby to Atsuko and bring Usagi and Daisuke and their children, and your children."

"Rin you can't—" Akari tries to interject.

"I can. This is my home and my lover trapped under there with my son. Your children will provide the light, Kai and Rei have learned building from their parents. They'll go and stabilize the interior so we can widen this shaft and pull Sesshomaru-sama out."

"You're lucky I love you like a sister." Akari takes the baby and kisses Rin's cheek. "I trust you with my life and the life of my children."

"As I have always trusted you." Rin bows her head and then takes Yuki to the shaft. "Hineko will light your way. Get your brother."

Yuki shivers as she makes it to the dampened shaft. She sizes up the hole. Taisho approaches her with a rope and ties it around her stomach. "Chin up cousin, you'll be fine."

"Listen to me little one," Katsumoto kneels by the opening, holding her shoulder. "Tread gently. If you move too much it could come crashing down on you. Step as if you are flying."

"But I can't fly," Yuki argues.

Katsumoto only ruffles her head. "You can do this Yuki."

She swallows hard and hugs her mother. "I'm sorry Ka-san."

"For what?"

"For being messed up." Yuki's lip trembles and she breaks, sobbing into her mother's chest.

"Oh my daughter. You aren't. There's nothing wrong with you."

"But I heard you and Chichiue say there's something wrong me," Yuki trembles.

"Yuki," Rin glides down to her knees and cups her daughter's chin. "You killed and it's left its mark on you. There is no sin in that. You did what you had to protect your brothers and now you will do what you must to save Harutoga. Ka-san believes in you."

"You do?"

"I always have. Now go. Chichiue needs you."

Yuki nods, pushing her tears back and climbs into the hole. Behind her Hineko holds the light steady. She paces herself, listening to Taisho remind her to tread carefully, to test her foot and hand holds. The shaft goes down, where the earth broke apart and swallowed part of their home. The water makes the stones slippery. But she perseveres, using her toe claws to grip the ground and the claws on her fingers to keep from sliding down the shaft head first. "I need more light!" she calls, regretting it the second she does. The rubble rumbles, and trembles. She winces, waiting for it to stop.

Orange light surrounds her, lighting her way just enough. She opens and closes her eyes and keeps moving. She slides down the last few feet, into the small open space where she finds her father. "Chichiue?" She crawls to him, through the blood and rubble. She sees the stone that severed his ankle and the large beam on his back.

"Yuki," he sighs in relief. "Take your brother."

"What about you?"

"Can you get the stone off my leg?"

"I can try."

"Slowly. If the rubble groans, stop."

"Yes, Chichiue." She crawls around, staining her hands and legs and finds the large stone on her father's foot. She lifts with all her might, but it's too heavy. She tries again, grunting and groaning. "It's too heavy. Can I melt it?"

"Get your brother…out…first…"

"Chichiue?"

"I'm fine."

"You're lying."

"You lied…too."

She cries again, burying her nose into his shoulder. "I keep having nightmares and I keep going back there. At night…"

"Shh," he moves his head to nuzzle her neck. "Death happens little one. There is no shame in killing to protect the ones you love. The first is always the worst."

"Did you feel this way?"

"I did. I killed my closest friend. He was offered a reward for my head."

"Were you nine?"

"No," Sesshomaru laughs, but then groans in pain. "Get your brother out. I'll tell you the story when this is off my back."

"Chichiue the rubble is piled high. You're meters below the top of the pile."

"Chichiue is not leaving you little one. Take your brother."

"Come on, Harutoga." She grabs her brother by the crook of his elbow. Harutoga is fevered and barely responsive. "What's wrong?"

"My blood. Slap his face."

Yuki slaps her brother as hard as she can, making him squeal in pain. "Yuki?" The gold and brown eyes open. "Yuki!" He throws his arms around her.

"We have to get out of here," Yuki encourages him. She pushes him towards the shaft.

"I'm so tired."

"I don't care, move!" Yuki pushes her brother butt to keep him going up the shaft. It seems up is harder than down. The rocks are slippery, and it's harder to find safe hand and foot holds. Every so often the rubble shivers and shakes, and pebbles fall from cracks. "Keep going."

"What if it falls on us?" Harutoga laments, stepping carefully up the shaft.

"I won't let you die little brother. To your left, see that opening? Pull on it and lift yourself up."

"My tummy burns."

"It's okay, keep moving. I've got you," Yuki encourages him, giving him her knee to stand on. "Keep going."

He lifts himself up again, weakly moving. All the while Yuki pushes on her brother to keep him moving. She finally stops when they are at the mouth of the shaft, there are cheers and huzzahs and sounds of celebration. "We did it!" Harutoga yells.

"You did it my love!" Rin helps them out of the shaft.

Yuki's eyes widen in shock and amazement, Kai, the hanyou kitsune is there with a torch, Rei-chan her best friend and Akari's twin sons Saito and Mitsuko. They are more than hanyou but less than pure blooded. At a century they are only a few inches taller than Yuki and Harutoga. But they are all there to help free Sesshomaru.

"Listen to me, all of you," Rin instructs the children. "We need to be able to move the rubble, enough to get Sesshomaru-sama out. Mitsuko and Saito will light the cave, Rei and Kai, you will stabilize it enough we can start moving the rubble. Okay?"

"I'm going back in," Yuki says firmly. "Chichiue needs me. There's a rock stuck on his ankle. It cut his foot off. It's kind of gross, but I want to put it back on."

"Then you will take these," Nobuatsu hands her a bag full of bandages and some foul smelling ointments. "Put them on your Chichiue's injuries."

One by one, the children enter the shaft and then spread out inside. Yuki comes last, carrying the bag over her shoulder. Her father has sunk lower into the mud beneath him. "Chichiue?" She touches his neck the way Obasan once taught her to feel his heart beat.

"I'm…still…here," he whispers, face buried in his elbow.

"Hold on," Yuki moves around the stone on his ankle. "Kai, Rei? Can we get this off?"

"There's not much space to move it," Kai answers, "but it doesn't look like it's attached to anything keeping the cave from collapsing."

"We can use it to stabilize that wall," Rei points to the side. "Can we lift it?"

"All of us together," Yuki nods her head, feeling like the boss. This is after all her home.

Together the children pull it off and then push it to the side, until it kisses the top of the cave, making everything groan. "A little more," Kai encourages them, gritting his teeth. "There." They set it down.

Yuki runs back to her father while Kai and Rei discuss what they need to get the area stable enough to move the beam off her father's back. "I found your foot." Yuki holds in front of her father's face. "Do I just put it back on?"

"And wrap it."

"If I cut my hand off will it heal like yours?" she asks him, while she cuts strips of his hakama off around the severed ankle and puts the ankle back on.

"I wouldn't test that theory little one."

"Can I cut off Harutoga's?" She spreads the ointments on the broken skin and then begins wrapping it tightly.

"No."

"Taiyomaru's?"

"No." He laughs, because he knows his daughter is trying to distract him.

The children crawl through the opening of the cave and call for lumber. Yuki cuts it for them, while Rei and Kai hold it in place. Where they can, Yuki and the twins begin to melt rocks and stones until they've cleared enough space to walk around hunched.

Hours later, they have finally finished bracing the sides of the cave and widened the shaft enough for Taisho to come down and make sure that it stable enough to start shifting the rocks above. He's brought water for Sesshomaru and dried fruit for the children. "We're ready!" he calls.

"Chichiue," Yuki takes her father's hand. "We're ready. Hang on."

Outside the cave, the morning sun is rising and the rain has finally let up enough that the rocks don't slip through the hands of those carrying them. The entire village has come to remove the stone and wood. During that time, Rin discovered that their guest bedrooms remained undamaged. Their bedrooms will have to be built again, but it didn't matter, as long as her lover came out of this alive.

The youkai take turns, tugging and pulling, moving stone after stone until they come across the large beam and uncover five muddy children and Sesshomaru hanging on for life. It takes Hisato and Sato together to pull the beam off Sesshomaru's back. Katsumoto flies him out of the hole and into the tent where Sesshomaru immediately loses consciousness next to Harutoga.

Yuki runs to her mother, hugging her around the waist. The other children run to their parents. Rin gazes around at her villagers, her friends, with pride. "We did it!" Yuki calls.

"We did it!" the other children yell.

A week later, when Chichiue is healed, he calls for a celebration in the village. There are bonfires, roasted boars on spits, tables full of fruits grown from their orchard and melon patches. Yuki runs with her friends, playing tag. Kai and Rei boast that the party is in their honor, but Yuki says it's Mitsuko and Daisuke.

Even Soba-sama comes to celebrate from her castle in the sky. She brings a giant ball of sweet rice so big it's carried by four female Inu-youkai in a giant golden bowl. Next to it she places a sweet fruity drink for the children.

The musicians play music, jolly notes that keep everyone dancing. And finally, Chichiue and Ka-san come on Aun's back. Chichiue's ankle still hurts, but it's like he never lost it. When Yuki asked him why he didn't do that with his missing arm after Ojisan cut it off, Chichiue tickled her until she couldn't breathe. Some things just shouldn't be asked.

The music stops when Chichiue gets off of Aun and limps lightly to the platform. He smiles at the children. The first time Yuki has ever seen him smile in public. "One week ago, our village was ravaged by an earthquake. This Sesshomaru was buried with his son. And now," he gazes around at the children, "we celebrate the children who showed no fear. The children who went into the depths to save this Sesshomaru. The children lead the way!"

**Please review! Now can we all agree that this is angst and Fire and Ice isn't? LOL...I'm flattered someone nominated it for angst but...I tried to make it not angsty but I fail. **

**Story rec...I just read a cool one with Kaede and Sesshomaru on AO3. Encounter by Sadladybug**

**Okay...responses **

**Smmahamazing: **And now I betray you with an angst filled chapter!

**Freshlymintedsesnshi:** Thank you so much! I've had so much fun writing this series.

**Mechine:** Trust me I wish someone had healed me down there, especially after baby #4...and I know about the comments. Let's just say some people can't handle my writing. But hey...I guess I can't please everyone. I agree, Rin and Sesshomaru have faced a lot of heart ache, but life has ups and downs. This happy ever after stuff is boring in my opinion. I want real life...to cope with my life LOL

**Guesswho:** Where are you? Are you okay? You are missing disease updates and I miss you! Oh man I just realized the last time I posted on this was in March right around the shut down. Man how the world has changed.

**Melizabeth lover:** I loved Chi!

**Nightbird:** Thank you! I was rolling writing the drunk Sesshomaru.

**New Reader:** Request will be granted. Morning after the hangover will get written. I just need more time.

**The rest of you asinine guest reviewers. Fuck off thank you. :)**


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